A/N Well, look who's back from the dead! Did anyone miss me? No? Alrighty then! :D
Sorry about the hiatus, guys. Writer's block is the main reason for my disappearance, though school certainly hasn't been helping either (just finished midterms, btw).
Anyway, a bunch of people (meaning like two or three) were wanting to see a certain cliché. You know those stories where someone plans to go to the closest lab to get their first pokémon, and they end up running late? And then for whatever reason, they're not given some common pokémon (pidgey, rattata, etc.) as an alternative, but something rare and coveted (like freaking psuedo-legendaries!) instead? How does that even make sense to anyone? Like HOW?!
Anyway, here's a lovely poem that took me way too long to write because I'm dumb and rhyming is hard.
Enjoy!
OoOoOoOoO
Not Safe for Newbies
There was once a Mary Sue
Who was feeling very blue.
She woke up late;
It seemed her fate
That her wish would not come true.
Ms. Sue had a grand old scheme
That she would be quit supreme.
She wanted fame
And great acclaim.
Wanted a great poké-team.
But it seemed that her cruel fate
Would make sure that she was late.
Her dream seemed dead,
Her hopes had fled,
And she wasn't feeling great.
But when she came to the lab,
There was still one more to grab.
A special one,
A better one
Than the things the others nabbed.
In the sphere Dratini slept,
Dreaming that he would be kept
By someone good,
Who surely would
Be a trainer quit adept.
Mary Sue looked at the 'mon,
And began to coo and fawn.
"It's oh so fine,
And it's all mine,
And it's full of brains and brawn!"
Here's a question, girls and gents:
Does this stuff make any sense?
Would someone sane
And with a brain
Let this crazy thing commence?
This young girl was very new,
And did not know what to do.
It's no surprise.
She wasn't wise,
And she simply had no clue
But alas, that's how things went,
And no one seemed to repent
That she now had
A thing, if mad,
Could make kids all broke and bent.
When Dratini saw this girl,
His keen thoughts began to whirl.
He then deduced
That this young goose
Would soon make him want to hurl.
But his thoughts the Sue knew not,
As she began to plan and plot.
The gyms, she knew,
They'd blaze right through.
They would soon be at the top.
But things seemed to go awry,
For Dratini was quite sly.
He felt no need
To ever heed
When she told him to comply.
Mary Sue felt like a wreck.
She kept thinking, "What the heck?
This dratini
Is a meanie.
I just can't keep him in check!"
Things kept getting even worse.
She felt like it was a curse.
This wasn't fun,
And she was done.
So she said to him, quite terse:
"I am done with you, you cur.
You're a loser, that's for sure.
You're such a pest,
And I suggest
That you end yourself, young sir."
Big mistake, the girl soon found.
She was soon knocked to the ground.
Dratini jeered,
And with a sneer,
Cooked her to a blackened mound.
This is how a tale will end
If you make an unsafe friend.
You might just die.
Your pals will cry.
Some will go around the bend.
Mary Sue was brokémon
By a little pokémon.
So please be kind,
And keep in mind
These words I have spokémon.
OoOoOoOoO
A/N So, how was it? Love it? Hate it? Read only the author's notes? :B In case you're wondering, this is how this poem was built: Each paragraph has five lines (though it's pretty hard to tell because Fanfiction won't let me separate the poem into neat little pieces). The first two lines have seven syllables, the next two have four, and the fifth line once again has seven. The first, second, and fifth lines rhyme with each other, as do the third and fourth. Repeat this over and over again, and you get this masterpiece/atrocity. It's actually really fun. :D
Anyway, I would love to hear your thoughts on this chapter and/or any of the ones preceding it. Everyone who reviews gets a giant plate of chewy, delicious imaginary brownies straight from the oven. That, or a nice glass of diet water with gluten-free ice cubes.
Oh, and happy early Halloween to everyone. :D I hope everyone eats lots of candy and gets lots of sp00ks. And maybe watches Nightmare Before Christmas or something.
Cheers!
~Geek
