For a second, he almost believes he isn't dreaming. It's a normal morning, he's sitting at the table, finishing some paperwork, and she's making coffee. Only once he notices the gaping wound in her back does Levi understand that none of this is real.

"What do you want?" He barks out to Petra. She looks up, confusion filling those large hazel eyes.

"What do you mean Captain? I was just making some coffee." She joins him at the table.

Of course this happens. Even his subconscious can't stand him. "Why do you do this to me? It's been years. Why can't the dead stay dead, instead of fucking up my life?!" Petra cringes and he understands why. For years he's tried holding it all in, and now he's breaking. He can't stand it anymore though. The dying, the bleeding, the screaming. He can't take always being the sole survivor.

"It's been tough without the squad, hasn't it?"

"After you guys died, Hell got even worse, if it was possible."

"I know…" She lays her hand on his. "You know we've been looking out for you. Hanji, Erwin, Eren, all of you." She squeezes his hand before continuing. "You don't have to be strong anymore, we're all here for you."

Levi remembers all the times she'd say that. While delivering coffee in the middle of the night, after sobbing from another failed expedition, between soft kisses and hard fucks. We're here for you, I'm here for you. Though she was one of the strongest people he knew, her real power came from her emotional strength.

So he lets the dam burst, he collapses into her as tears roll down his face. He feels Petra rub circles into his back and she litters his forehead with kisses.

"There, there," She murmurs into his ear. "That's good let it all out."

"I don't know why I'm doing this." He pulls back, trying to recover the mask he always wore. "But then again maybe because none of this shit is real."

Petra cocks her head to the side and a copper hair falls out of place. "What do you mean?" Without thinking, he moves to tuck the strand behind her ear.

"You're dead. The only way we could talk is if it was a dream." But as soon as those words were out his mouth, he noticed something. In all his dreams of Petra, and he had many after that expedition, he's never felt a thing. But he'll be damned if he didn't feel it when he tucked that strand back in place.

Petra smiles, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes. Slowly she unbuttons his shirt and pulls it back to revel a giant scar over where his heart should be.

"Levi, it's not a dream,"