A—A—B—B

I apologize, White Kyokaen, that it gave you such a headache ^^; but sadly, no one else got it, so I can't reveal the secret *shrugs* feel special that you got it! ...Well...kinda... 8'D

But damn, this is the longest chapter by far. Enjoy!

-PD

P.S. An unexpected pairing made its way in here ¬ w ¬


Head Over Heels

Ace watched Smoker's retreating back with a complicated frown on his face. He started to go after Smoker, but he stopped, biting his lip and turning to go the other way. Little did the awkward pair know that there had been another set of eyes watching from the adjacent alley way.

In the kitchen of the Alubarna restaurant, Saga was washing dishes as Sanji helped prepare foods. Out of the corner of his eye, Saga watched Smoker and Zoro come and go, the twins both feverishly trying to keep up with the Saturday crowd. Saga thought back to yesterday, when he had seen Ace and Zoro leave together and he thought about just their general closeness. However, he had also caught Ace kissing Smoker just that morning. For Zoro's sake, and Smoker's as well he supposed, though he wasn't nearly as close to the older twin, he was worried that this Ace guy was two-timing the twins.

Saga quickly finished the dishes and went to help Sanji chop the seemingly never-ending supply of vegetables. "Hey, Sanji." He picked up a knife and got to work on the onions. "Who does that Ace guy like?"

Sanji quirked an eyebrow, "What, you interested in him, too?" He snorted scornfully, "Good luck, the bastard's taken."

'...But by who?' Saga quickly finished one onion and moved on to the next. "Oh, really?" He figured pretending to know nothing about it would be the easiest way to get information out of his fellow cook.

"Yeah, fucking Marimo bastard."

'He's with Zoro?' Saga's eyes widened, and he was about to say something when the aforementioned party spoke up.

"What'd you say about me, shitty cook?" Zoro shouted through the service window.

"None of your damn business, you useless waiter! Table 7's food has been ready for almost 5 minutes! It'll get cold, dammit!"

"That's in Smoker's section!"

"Just go, will you? Or are you too busy sitting on your ass to take food to a table?"

"Alright, Jesus, pull that cactus out of your ass, why don't you?" Zoro scooped up the tray and hurried off to deliver the food, having to force a smile onto his face as he dealt with the customers.

Saga waited until Zoro was good and gone before speaking up again. "So Zoro and that Ace guy are together?"

Sanji snorted scornfully, "Saw em in that Alley over there," Sanji gesticulated vaguely in the direction the presumed alley was, "they were fuckin all over each other."

Saga frowned. He'd known Zoro a while, and he'd never really been one for pda. Something didn't seem quite right with Sanji's story, but he didn't think Sanji would lie about that sort of thing.

"Why do you ask?" Saga looked over at a clearly ruffled Sanji, listening as the blonde spoke. "You got a thing for the moss head, or what?"

Saga figured it wouldn't hurt to be honest. "Yeah, I do." He smiled, somewhat bashfully. "He's cute, ain't he? If he wasn't with Ace, I was gonna ask him out."

Sanji crushed the bright red bell pepper in his hand, brow twitching. "Oh really." His voice was tight as he spoke, working to cut up the pepper around where it'd been brutally squashed.

"Hm? You don't mind, do you?" Saga didn't really feel he needed Sanji's blessing, but if Sanji was uncomfortable working around gay people—he highly doubted that this was the case—he didn't want to make the blonde uncomfortable.

"What? No! I don't give a flying fuck about that green-haired moron. He means nothing to me. I can't stand the stupid ba—" Sanji's eyes diverted to the service window and he saw Zoro leaning against it and staring straight at Sanji. Sanji's jaw snapped shut so tight and so quick he nearly bit off his tongue.

"Yeah, well, being forced to see your ugly face and that ridiculous eyebrow every day isn't a walk in the park either." His insult lacked its usual sting, sounding lackluster and forced, quite unlike usual. "Table 12 is wondering where in the hell their food is."

"Ask the chefs, not me. I'm just an assistant, remember?" Sanji frowned at Zoro and then at Saga before heading off to go do some other sort of menial task and to let the chefs know that the order for table 12 was overdue.

Saga watched as Zoro stuck his newest order up for the chefs to see, the young man wearing a frown as he turned to walk away from the service window, obviously upset.

"H-Hey, Zoro," Saga called, going over to the window, "wanna hang out after work today?"

Zoro stopped in his tracks and turned to face Saga, staring blankly at him a moment before he answered. "Yeah, sure, sounds cool." His mouth twitched up into a little smile before he hurried off to go take care of the customers.

Saga couldn't help but smile a little too. At this point, he didn't really care if Zoro saw him as a friend now. He was just hoping that after today he might be seen in a different light.

o()o()o

That evening, Perona was applying her favorite shade of red lipstick, preparing to go out for a night on the town with some of her friends. She applied her base and her eye shadow before she picked up her lash curler.

"Going somewhere?"

Perona jumped, almost clamping her lid in surprise. "Jeez! Smoker, you startled me! I almost pinched my eyelid!" She turned back to the mirror and continued her primping.

"I thought you were grounded."

"Dad and mom are at a business dinner. They won't be home till late, right~?" She smiled mischievously as she finished curling her lashes, putting down the curler and picking up her liner and mascara.

"...You look better without all that make up. You don't need it, you're only 15."

"I'll be 16 soon enough! Ugh, you sound just like Dad, you old geezer." Perona stared at herself in the mirror, smiling a little sadly. "Besides, I don't look cute without it..."

Smoker went up behind his sister and stated at her reflection in the vanity. "...You're always, er...cute." His face burned with the awkwardness he felt saying things like that. "And you usually act like you know that already. Besides, boys are just gonna think you're trashy if you wear all that."

"Shut up! You're just my brother, what do you know?" She frowned as she put down her make up and began to fix her hair.

"It's because I am your brother that I can say that sort of embarrassing shit. If I think you look like a tramp with all that make up on, which I do, I'll tell it to your face." He shrugged and turned away. "Whatever. I'm going over to Law's. I'll see you later. Be safe."

Perona's scowl disappeared as soon as Smoker closed her door. She looked at herself in the mirror before grabbing a pad and her make-up remover.

Smoker was just putting on his boots when Perona came down the stairs, stopping half way, wearing only her lipstick and bit of mascara. She would never give up her candy red lipstick. "Um...Can I...Can I come with you?"

Smoker smiled a small smile up at his sister. "Grab a coat. It's cold out."

o()o()o

"So where's Zoro?"

"I think he went to the movies or something." Smoker stopped at a corner, trying to remember exactly which street his friend lived on. "I dunno who with though, his voicemail was kinda muffled. Think it was Sa—Something."

"Do you think he finally got a date with Sanji?" She asked excitedly. Finally! She was getting a chance to gossip about her brother's love life! How exciting!

"...What do you mean?"

"Well, duhhh, he's had a crush on him for, like, a month now. Jeez, how could you not know?" Perona put her hands on her hips, pouting up at her brother.

"...Well...he never told me he had a crush on anyone, just that he had a thing for guys." Smoker felt a little left out, having to find out who Zoro liked through their sister. Though he had never really asked if Zoro had liked anyone, and Zoro was they type of person that wouldn't say anything unless asked directly.

"Well, it'd be nice if things worked out for him. Oh! By the way~"

"No, we're not talking about Ace. I don't even want to think about it."

"Gah, Smoker! Why do you have to be so difficult! Why don't you ever want to talk to me about him?"

"Look, Ace and I are completely incompatible. So just drop it already. It'll never happen. Not in this lifetime."

Perona looked up at her brother with concern. He didn't sound angry or aggravated like usual. If anything he sounded like he'd given up and was still trying to convince himself that this tree would never beat any fruit.

"Why wouldn't it work? You obviously like him." Smoker scoffed and was about to retort when Perona spoke up again. "And he's head over heels for you."

Smoker closed and opened his mouth, trying to find the right words. "You don't know that."

Perona stepped in front of him, stopping him in his tracks. She put her hands on her hips and got in his face as best as she could, as she was a good 6 inches shorter. "The reason he wanted to try and make you jealous was probably because he wasn't sure whether you liked him or not. You're damn near impossible to read you know? And it takes a whole lot of guts to try and break through that grumpy and not at all cute exterior of yours." Perona folded her arms and continued walking. "Seriously!"

Smoker followed after, hands shoved in his pockets meekly. His sister had shut him up pretty good, which was highly unusual. "...For someone who's usually so selfish, impulsive, and typically rather gullible and naive..."

"Oi!"

"You do have a couple pearls of wisdom tucked up in there." He tapped her pink-haired head affectionately. "Thanks Perona." He wrapped an arm around her neck and brought her in for a side hug, smirking when she squawked in protest.

"Geeeh! Let me go! You're acting weird and nice and it's freaking me out~! Stoooop!"

Smoker couldn't help but laugh. "You little brat."

"Grumpy old man!"

o()o()o

By the time the siblings finally arrived at Law's house, it had started to snow.

"Oh, hey...Why'd you bring your sister?"

"Cause I felt like it." Smoker walked in past Law and into his extravagantly large house, Perona following behind him, staring at everything in awe. "Your Dad home?" He asked.

Law's face split into a shit-eating grin. "Outta town on one of his conferences."

Smoker's grin instantly mirrored Law's. "His stash is full right?"

"When isn't it?"

"Smoker, what are you two talking about?"

"I'm gonna be a bad example here, but we're gonna have ourselves a little party with the good doctor's booze and cigars."

"No way!" She had never seen Smoker's rebellious side before. It really surprised her, but she wasn't one to bring down a party. Not usually.

"She's not gonna squeal on us, is she?" Law glared over at Perona, who didn't buckle under his gaze like he'd expected.

"If I get completely wasted, it might convince me to keep my mouth shut~" She winked, sticking out her tongue, "Otherwise it might just slip out~"

"Or I could just tell Mom and Dad that you snuck out to see your friends."

Perona froze, "Alright, I'll keep quiet."

"Good." Law gave one last glare before turning back to Smoker. "Oh, by the way, I invited Sanji too. You know him, right?"

"Sanji's here?" Perona was shocked, she had thought that Zoro was out with Sanji. If he wasn't with Sanji...who was he with?"

"You know him?" Law turned his attention to the girl.

"Er...by name, but I've never seen him."

"Ah." Law turned back to Smoker, still waiting for his answer."

"Well, we work at the same place. Don't really talk to him much."

"He was in a piss poor mood when he called, figured he could use a little booze. He's up in my room right now." Law headed over to a huge, mahogany cupboard, throwing it open to reveal an array of liquor bottles and several boxes of cigars. "Pick your poison."

"Sweet." Smoker grinned, reaching for a box of Cuban cigars and taking two out.

"Smoker, can I have a cigar?"

"It'll make you sick. I don't really want you having one just for you to wind up puking the whole way home."

Perona grimaced and withdrew, simply grabbing a bottle of Bailey's instead. Law grabbed a bottle of wine and a bottle of Smirnoff. "Alright, this's more than enough. Let's head up."

Law lead the way upstairs to his room, and once they stepped inside, Perona was floored. The macabre decorations had her in awe. She suddenly had a new respect for Law and his creepy side.

"Oh, you're back." Sanji had been lounging on his bed, doing something on his phone. "Oh, hey Smoker." Sanji greeted with a bit of a wave. "Didn't know you knew Law."

"Yeah, hated each other in like 8th grade, but somehow we seemed to become friends." Smoker sat down against the dresser, pulling his lighter out of his pocket.

Sanji grinned broadly when he saw Perona step into the room. "Ahh, we meet again cutie~ Will you finally tell me your name?"

"GEH! You're Sanji?" Perona shrunk back behind the door. "Smoker~ That's the guy I was gonna have you beat up for me!" Perona was absolutely appalled by the recent turn of events. Why on earth would Zoro fall for this creepy pervert? It didn't make any sense to her.

"Huh? Him?" Smoker was surprised, to say the least.

"Wait, are you their sister?" Well that was awkward. Sanji knew that Zoro had a sister, but neither he nor Smoker had ever really talked about her at work.

Law just watched the moment with an indifferent expression as he brought out his secret shot glasses. "Guys, shut up. Let's just get drunk off our asses."

An hour later and already Sanji and Perona were piss drunk. Perona, being only 5'3" and rather skinny, got drunk after only one full glass of Bailey's, but that didn't stop her, and she was already pouring her third.

"Horo horo horo horo~ Smokerrrrr this stuff is soooo gooood~ Horo horo horo~"

Smoker was just finishing up his cigars, the nicotine putting a nice buzz around his head. "Hmm...you should probably stop soon, Perona. Don't wanna be too drunk when ya get home..."

"Ahhh, c'mooooon~ Zoro, you gotta drink more than thaaat~" Sanji threw an arm around Smoker's shoulders as he washed down his 4th, or was it his 5th glass of wine.

"Sanji, I told you, 'm Smoker, not Zoro."

"Nawwwww, don' lie to meee..." Sanji nosed Smoker in the cheek, and Smoker suddenly flashed back to earlier that day with Ace. He blushed, turning away and reaching for his abandoned, mostly empty bottle of Smirnoff.

"Get'off me..." He mumbled as he tilted the bottle back.

"Awwww...Zoro~ Don't be shyyy...jus' cause of earlier, don' be maad..." Sanji put his glass down before wrapping himself around Smoker, comfortably situating Smoker between his legs and letting the slightly larger man lay back against his chest.

Law watched with apparent disinterest, but he himself was too drunk to really do anything or have an opinion about what he was watching. He sat there, silently watching as the scene before him unfolded. He had enough presence of mind to know that something was gonna happen, but he didn't have any plans to interfere. He looked over at Perona, staring unabashedly through half lidded eyes. What a cool girl she was...that skull shirt rocked...yeeeeaaaah...his mind petered off into more abstract, drunken musings.

Perona took a moment to notice, but when she did, she got right in his face. "Whatchya lookin aaaat?"

Law reached up and grabbed hold of her hair. "It's like...a lot of cotton candy..."

Smoker watched Law and Perona with a careful, drunken eye, but when Sanji practically shoved the bottle down his throat, his attention on his sister quickly turned into attention towards Sanji, who, after Smoker'd finished off the bottle, was starting to look remarkably similar to a certain black-haired interest of his.

"Hey...Ace..." Smoker mumbled, face flushed with the heat of drunkenness as he tried to look back at Sanji from where he sat. "Did you...dye'yer hair...or somefin?"

Sanji couldn't even activate enough of his brain cells to form a coherent answer. He had Smoker sitting on his lap and he was fumbling with Smoker's left earlobe. There was something different about it, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He leaned forward and gently bit it, tongue rolling over the soft skin and making Smoker squirm.

"...Ace..." Smoker groaned as he blindly reached for another drink, even though his head was already spinning, lolling as if his neck didn't feel like it was strong enough to support it. He could feel the pleasant, throbbing pressure move about in his head, his vision feeling like it was moving slower than his eyes were.

Sanji didn't know why Zoro kept calling him Ace...Oh, that's right: Zoro and Ace were dating. Well, if Zoro thought he was Ace, what harm could it be to play along? He took Smoker's chin and turned his head so he could press a gentle kiss to his lips. He missed, twice, getting his chin and then just to the right of his lips before connecting.

Smoker brought a hand up to Sanji's hair as he kissed back who he thought was Ace. Sanji's hands traveled across his chest, one hand slipping under his shirt, going up to molest his muscular chest.

Smoker groaned, his other hand going up to grip at Sanji's arm as his body arched into Sanji's touch. He shifted in Sanji's lap, trying to adjust himself so they were facing each other. As he shifted, he could feel a firm lump rub against his ass. His movements elicited a throaty moan from Sanji as he moved. He straddled Sanji's lap, wrapping his arms around him as he slipped his tongue inside the blonde's eager mouth, deepening their kiss. The two of them were slowly grinding their crotches together as they grabbed and groped at each other.

Sanji's hands traveled down Smoker's sides, down to his ass where he groped and kmeaded, panting and moaning as he rolled his hips up into Smoker's ass. One of his hands wandered to Smoker's fly, opening it and sliding his hand inside. Smoker mirrored the action, hand cupping Sanji's growing erection and palming it gently. Sanji's hand found its way into the back of Smoker's pants, running teasing fingers over the crack of his ass, thumb hooked inside the waistband of his boxerbriefs.

Law had had just about enough of this. He looked down at the mass of pink cotton candy on his lap. "Oi...Ain't your brother goin a bit far? They do know we're still 'er right?"

Perona had been fiddling with Smoker's belt chain, admiring all the charms he had hanging off of it, her favorite being a little karate bear. It took her a moment to realize she was being talked to. She sat up and stared at Smoker and Sanji. She watched her brother writhe and moan in Sanji's lap as clothing was slowly starting to come undone. She felt like there was something wrong, but it took her a moment to notice what it was. When it finally clicked what was going on, she sobered up a bit, feeling anger rise.

"Smoker!" She got up and stalked over to her brother, grabbing the back of his shirt and pulling him off Sanji. "What the hell are you doing!"

Smoker grabbed at Sanji, not wanting to be separated from the blonde However, his double vision making him miss his original target. Why was he being taken away from Ace? They were finally together, why was his sister pulling them apart? He looked at the man he'd been plastered to, furrowing his brow.

Smoker looked over Sanji with his disheveled hair and opened fly—shit when did that happen?—and the realization of the situation hit him like a ton of bricks. 'That's not Ace...' He staggered to his feet, stumbling into the wall. "Perona, we're-we're goin home..." He held onto the wall with one hand as he fixed his pants with the other, slowly making his way down the hall, face drawn tight into a focused frown as he demanded the hallway to stop wiggling around like that.

Perona looked down at Sanji as the blonde tilted his head, wondering where in the hell Zoro had gone. Perona went over to where Smoker had been sitting, picking up his forgotten phone. She looked over at Sanji, who looked genuinely upset that Zoro, or who he'd thought was Zoro, had gotten up and left so abruptly. He looked up from his still half hard erection into the inquisitive face of the younger sister.

"Whr's Zoro?" He asked, still terribly confused.

Perona stared a moment, brain slowly working around her buzz. "You like my brother? You like Zoro?"

Sanji started blankly before he chuckled a bit, remembering something Saga had said to him earlier that day. "S'cute, ain' 'e? Ah'like 'im..."

Perona smiled and patted Sanji on the head, as if praising a good dog. She stood up, a little wobbly on her feet, but nowhere near as bad as her brother, and set off after Smoker.

"Oi," Law called from where he was still sitting, "take care o' yerself...don't get killed or some'n on yer way back...num's 555-51...no...555...uh...555...5298 if y'get 'nto shit ya can' handle...call it...'n I might pick up..." He tipped his hat down over his eyes, preparing to pass out in his drunken stupor. "Later...cotton candy head..."

Perona smiled despite herself. "Take care of yourself, Mr. Bearsy~"

"Th' fuck's a bearsy?"

"Cause you got bears on your chain!" She explained, as if any moron could see her logic.

"...His name's Bepo..."

Perona rolled her eyes. "Whatever, I'm leaving." She turned around after Law had given her a little wave of farewell, hurrying to catch up to her brother. She was thankful that she'd stopped after only 3 drinks, as she was already about halfway to sober.

Smoker was presently trying to make his way down the stairs, but he couldn't quite tell where the edges of the stairs were, so progress was slow and a touch painful when his foot missed. Perona sighed at the pathetic display.

"Smoker, give me your arm."

"No. I got it..." He pouted, wrapping his arms around the banister. His front half was starting to slide down the banister while his feet tried to remain where they were. If he let go now, he'd surely fall face first down the stairs. His brow furrowed as he tried to solve this problem.

Perona frowned, "Just trust me!" She took his legs and brought them down to where he could stand. She pried one of his arms off the banister and threw it around her shoulders. It was a long, difficult process, but eventually they made it down. Once Smoker felt safe enough to let go of the banister, he wrapped both arms around his younger sister.

"I wanna go hooome...I wan' Zoro...I wan' Ace..." He whined, burying his face into her shoulder.

She huffed, "Why are you only cute when you're drunk! Seriously..." As Smoker slowly put more and more weight on her, she began to wobble. "Gyaaah! Stop, stop, stop! Not cute! Not cute! Too heavyyyy!" She crumpled beneath his weight, the two of them falling to the floor.

"...Peronaaaa...'m sleepy..." He groaned from where he lay somewhat on top of her.

Perona huffed. What a troublesome guy her brother was. She pulled his cell phone out of her pocket and opened it. Now, who would want to come out at midnight to help her with her drunk ass brother?

A) Call Zoro

B) Call Ace (Next Chapter)


Author's Note

Meh heh heh~ bet you weren't expecting the bit of SanSmo, were ya? ^^~

Bwaaaahhhh~

Thank you guys for the reviews! I normally take the time to respond to them all, but I haven't really been able to this time :C

-PD