Hi, guys! I'm truly sorry about how long the wait has been between chapters but I have absolutely no extra time to write now, which I know is weird since we're supposed to have more time come summer. Anyway, I hope you enjoy chapter four, which is mainly an explanation to most of your questions regarding Cassidy and the divorce. Enjoy and review!
I raced out of the restaurant and to the nearest cab, which, of course, was taken by some old woman with a grocery bag and a cane. I ran a couple of blocks until I caught another cab and gave them my address as quickly as I could, not thinking about anything except Ally and the book and what happened. As we rounded the corner near my apartment building, the cabbie didn't stop.
"Hey, man, what are you doing? You missed my stop!"
"No, dude. We still got about five minutes left." I slumped back against my seat as I remembered which address I'd given him when I got in. I had told him Cassidy's address, my old home, and now I was headed straight into what, for the last few weeks, my mind had created as my own personal Hell and for some reason I just didn't tell the cabbie to turn around. As soon as he parked across the street from Cassidy's I handed him a fifty dollar bill and told him to keep the change. It was far more than necessary, but I figured that if I was about to do something that I'd been dreading for weeks and probably not come out of it very well, at least someone would have a good day. He thanked my as I slammed the door shut and waved him on. Then, I was standing on the stoop saying a silent prayer as my finger pressed the doorbell.
I listened to it chime five times, dreading each new sound as it carried my fate closer. I didn't expect what happened next.
"Who are you?" A man, about 6'3", dark hair and eyes like chocolate opened the door. I didn't know how to respond until the man looked me up and down, clearly understanding who I was, then called inside. It was then that I realized the aforementioned was half-naked, standing in front of me in only boxer shorts and socks.
"Austin?" Cassidy asked, stepping into the springtime sun in a very revealing tank-top and one of what were my favorite pairs of her shorts. I guess they still were if I bothered to notice that she was wearing them. "Hey- what are you doing here?" She stood a safe distance from me, but still didn't dare touch what's-his-name while I was standing here.
"Um...," I couldn't get any words out, "I, uh, I'm-"
"Okay," Cassidy said, stretching the "O" to make it clear that she was about to say something to alleviate the awkwardness. "David, could you come with me for a moment, and Austin- wait here. I'll be right back." Cassidy took the man, whose name I now knew was David. I waited on the porch for what seemed like an hour until I checked my phone- yup, four minutes had elapsed and still no sign of my ex-wife. She came out a moment later with a pink robe on and sat down on the swinging bench on the porch, gesturing for me to join. I did, but by pulling a stationary bench from the side of the wall in front of the swing. I prayed that she would talk first and she did.
"So... that's David. He's, uh, a friend...," Cassidy muttered.
"Uh huh. Just one question- how long have you been... 'friends' with David." I put the middle school style air quotes around "friends" to emphasize my frustration.
"Well," Cassidy began, obviously stumped by my question. For good reason, too, because the answer was not one that I wanted, but that I knew was true. "About eleven months."
"And... I have a headache."
"Austin! You don't understand!"
"Yeah, yeah, I do. You cheated on me. You're still with the guy that you had an affair with. The same guy that, I presume, is the reason that our marriage is over?" Cassidy managed a single, choked response.
"Yes." Damn it, I still couldn't bear to see her hurt. After all she's put me through, I can't let her sit here feeling hurt. I reached out and held her hand in mine, but couldn't think of any words to express what I wanted to say, so I just stayed there for a while until she had calmed herself down.
"Austin," she finally muttered, "I'm really sorry."
"I know...," I said. I didn't know why, because I didn't know, but it just felt like the right thing to say. Damn my uncontrollable tact.
"I wish you did," Cassidy said, then started to laugh a little. She wiped her nose on her fluffy pink sleeve and looked at me, eyes bloodshot. "I know you have the songbook."
Okay, now that was not what I had expected her to say. Not that I had expected anything, but if I had it was definitely not that.
"What?"
"I put it in that box. So that you'd have it. I, um, kept it from you since the day that you moved in with me."
"What!" I felt anger rising and I knew that it was starting to reflect in my voice.
"And that's how I thought you would react. Well, can I just tell you why?"
"Sure," I muttered, angrily and followed by some curses in my head.
"Well, when I found you again in Miami during my band's tour... you had already had this whole thing with Ally. You'd dated and everything and once, after we had started dating again, Dez came up to me one night and told me that I was screwing with true love. That I was about to do something unspeakably horrible if I continued dating you. Then, there was the night that we went to Sonic Boom and met with Trish and Ally and when the two of us were leaving I forgot my purse so I ran back inside and heard Ally crying upstairs. And then-"
"Okay, you need to stop. Right now. Just shut up." I stood up from the bench and started pacing the porch, closing my eyes tightly to fight off any tears threatening to escape. "Let me get this straight. You kept the one thing that was holding me to my best friend in the entire world for your own selfish f-ed up reasons, after forcing me to say goodbye to her forever? What the hell is wrong with you?" I kicked the bench hard, then fixed it and sat down. Feeling not in the least bit relieved.
"Yes. And I know it was wrong, but I couldn't bear the fact that you weren't a hundred percent mine and I-"
"I what? That I wasn't a hundred percent yours? I loved you so much, how could you think that I was still anyone else's?"
"It wasn't what you said or what you did. It was something that I just felt," Cassidy replied slowly. I ignored her and kept up my rant.
"This coming from the woman who decided to have an affair! Talk about not one hundred percent in a relationship!"
"Okay, trash me but don't talk about David. You don't even know him! He's a really sweet guy once you get to know him and-"
"Yeah, no- I'm sorry. He's SUCH a sweet guy. I mean, so sweet to steal my wife away from me! So sweet as to steal the woman I LOVE away from me! So sweet to-"
"AUSTIN SHUT UP! Just listen." I let Cassidy guide me to the swinging bench next to her, I met her eyes and focused on her face. Every detail of her face from the curve of her lips to each individual eyelash. I let it all go. "Austin, I was never the one you truly loved."
"Bull crap, Cassidy."
"No, Austin, hear me out. Do you remember the night about a year ago that you had a meeting with Jimmy and you were away that whole night. You went to the New York office."
"Do not tell me that was the night you started hooking up with David in there."
"No, Austin." Cassidy took my hand and continued. "But at that point, I knew that there wasn't much left between us. And, yeah, I had already met David."
"Oh splendid, do I get to hear your entire love story with the amazing David?"
"No. Austin, listen. That night I was watching MTV and they were replaying documentaries of stars for some weird marathon and while I was watching, there was a documentary about...," Cassidy stopped and took a breath, calming herself, "Ally."
"What?"
"Well, during the interview they asked her about her favorite song that she'd written and it was some obscure one that I've never even heard before. I can't even remember the name of it. But, anyway, it was a love song and when asked who it was about, she said, and I quote, 'I've only had one true love, and it's about him, but I won't tell anymore.' I was pretty sure that she meant you and... and that was when I knew why you had always been a little distant."
"Distant, what do you mean? I was a perfect gentleman, I listened to you, I talked with you, I did everything. Even big romantic gestures."
"I know, but it never felt really... right. But now, with David, it does feel right." I really couldn't hear anymore, I stood up from the swing and faced Cassidy, who was now standing right in front of me.
"I don't care anymore, Cassidy. Honestly, thank you for setting me free because, especially after all that you just said, I'm going to Miami. I'm gonna go find Ally and try and fix what I screwed up with her all those years ago." A tear rolled down Cassidy's cheek and she hugged me. She stood on her toes and I'll never forget what I heard her whisper in my ear.
"I really hope you get her."
Ooo drama! Alright, so, good? bad? what did you guys think? I spent a long time coming up with the idea for that chapter because I knew that there was going to be a lot of dialog and a lot of talk about Austin and Cassidy and the divorce, but I still wanted it to be intese and good. Anyway, review! :D
