Unforgettable Nights, Unforgivable Mistakes
Chapter 7: Reflections and Looking Back Through Time.
FOUR YEARS LATER: LONDON
Emily was driving back home from a long day at work with a major headache, and all she wanted to do was see her little girl and husband. The last couple of weeks at Interpol had been crazy chaos, one case after another, and on days like this, she wished she wasn't the boss where she was responsible for the outcome of these cases. Of course, being the perfectionist she was, she always pushed herself to the max, even if that meant more hours and exhausting herself the most.
It had been almost four years since Emily made the decision to marry Max and move on with her life, a decision she sometimes deeply regretted. Although, she was happy, she would always carry a doubt in her subconscious, along with the guilt and the uncertainty that she had made a mistake. Sometimes, she felt like a horrible and selfish person, but she had made the decision she made for many reasons, but mostly to protect her daughter and her daughter's happiness. When she discovered she was pregnant and Max asked her to marry him, she wanted to run, she wanted to walk the other way to shut Max out of her life, but it wasn't because she didn't love Max. She did care for him, and she had come to love him now, but at the time she discovered she was pregnant, there were a lot of things that made her doubt that a marriage with Max would work. She wasn't really the type of woman that would think she had to get married because she was pregnant; she knew very well that wasn't how love worked, and that definitely wasn't how life worked. She felt as if she had moved too fast with the entire Max thing, and she hadn't been sure if a relationship with him would work.
There was also the fact that she had been intimate with another man and there might be a small possibility that Max wasn't the father of her baby, and in her mind, that was a big issue. The possibility of that other man being the baby's father was miniscule compared to Max being the real father, but that truth scared the hell out of her! And more than that being true, the fear of being judged and the fear of people's reactions, especially her mother's and Max's, stayed in Emily's mind constantly. They would probably all judge her to be some kind of cheap slut that fell into bed with any man after a couple of drinks. That was not the kind of woman she was, but it did put her in a very tough position if her child turned out to be another man's.
Also, as much as she hated to admit it, that other man would never accept the baby as his, if it turned out the baby was indeed his. That man hated her and had hated her for three years...ever since the day she set foot on BAU property, even if they had slept together that one night. He hated her so badly...she couldn't even picture what his face would look like if she told him she was pregnant with his baby...he would probably kick her out from wherever they were and tell her to disappear and take that baby with her. He would never care for her baby or her, so why subject herself with the humiliation of being rejected by him, and worse, why put her baby through that pain and agony.
It was a selfish and stupid logic, and she would probably hate herself for hiding something so important, but again, this wasn't about her, this was about her baby's safety and happiness, and she knew Max was an amazing person and would protect her and her baby with everything in him. Max was the kind of loving person and father she needed to give her baby, even if there was a small possibility he wasn't the biological father, and to be honest, the chances of Max not being the father were slim to none, so why cause so much pain and trouble about something she didn't even know for sure. So she moved on with her decision to marry Max because she knew that was the best decision she could make for her baby. Five months after she married Max, she gave birth to a beautiful and healthy baby girl that they named Bay Arian Olsen, and she was the most beautiful tiny human Emily thought she had ever seen. Bay was a clone and exact image of Emily, in fact, she could be her twin. Bay had raven black hair and alabaster skin, with chocolate brown eyes, so she looked a lot like Max, and although Emily had dimples they weren't as defined as Bay's. Bay's dimples were very prominent; that was something that made Emily really uncomfortable sometimes. Emily immediately fell deeply in love with her daughter; she was everything Emily had ever wanted in life. Bay brought so much happiness and joy to her life. Watching her grow everyday was an adventure. Bay was curious and very smart, and she had started walking and talking at a very early age. Max was sure she had inherited her mother's beauty and intelligence. He and Emily had talked about enrolling Bay in an early school for toddlers; they wanted their daughter to have the best education possible. Bay was sweet-natured and very loving, but she also had her mother's temper...she could definitely throw tantrums. Her intelligence and sweetness never ceased to amaze Emily, but sometimes Bay's dimples or frown took her in a direction she had avoided going in for the past three years.
The truth was, though, Emily was happy...her daughter had become the most important thing in her life; she has successful in her job, and she and Max where happy. It might be that she wasn't completely and utterly in love with Max like most movies showed, but she cared for him a lot, and it was a different kind of love. Emily was sure that one day she would learn to love him like that, like he was everything in the world to her. They were happy and they had a child together, that was all that she needed now, and she was comfortable and satisfied with that. When Emily finally arrived home she couldn't have been more relieved. It truly had been a rough month but now she was home, and nothing else mattered for her. She parked her car in the driveway of her house and got out of her car, tiredly making her way to the front door. She opened the door and the smells of her house greeted her immediately, it was a fresh night of spring, and it was starting to rain. Emily placed her purse and briefcase on the usual chair by the door, and she could smell the delicious food coming from the kitchen and the laughter of her husband and daughter. She walked into the kitchen slowly and the image in front of her made all the stresses on her mind disappear. Max was cooking dinner, and Bay was helping him sitting on one of the kitchen stools. They were making chocolate cupcakes, and Bay had chocolate all over her face, hands and apron.
"Hi, guys." Emily said, smiling joyfully.
"Mommy...!" Bay jumped off the stool running toward her mother...
Emily's smile got even wider and caught her little girl in her arms, hugging her tightly and smacking her little face with kisses.
"Hello, my sweetness." Emily said, kissing Bay and holding her close.
"Mommy, we're making cupcakes." Bay cried happily.
"I see that." Emily laughed, wiping the chocolate frosting from Bay's cheek.
"You also need a shower." Emily added when she realized the chocolate was all over her shirt and curly hair. Smiling, she picked her daughter up in her arms and walked further into the kitchen.
"Hi, honey." She said, pressing a kiss to her husband's cheek. Max was a nuclear engineer and made a good deal of money, but he worked mostly in the mornings while Bay was at pre-school, and after that, he would come home so he could take care of Bay and make dinner until Emily got off.
"Hi, darling, how was work?" Max asked her, handing her a cup of tea.
"It was a very long...day." Emily replied tiredly, smiling at his sweetness.
"Dinner is almost ready, you can eat, and then we can all go to bed." Max said, pressing a gentle kiss on her lips. He knew she had been working a lot for the last couple of weeks.
"Actually, I want to take a shower first, if you don't mind, then we can have dinner together." Emily said smiling.
"Of course, darling, go...I'll set the table for us." Max said smiling.
"Come here, munchkin, let's take a shower." Emily told her three year old, picking her up again.
"I don't want to take a shower, mommy." Bay protested, pouting.
"You have to, baby, you are covered in chocolate...come on, you can take a shower with mommy." That got the little girl more excited, and they headed upstairs to take a shower.
When they were inside the master bathroom, Emily began to undress her little girl; they had taken showers together before, and Bay was very used to her mother's naked body. So, when Emily started taking her daughter's clothes off, she noticed there was some small bruising on her legs and knees...nothing to be highly concerned about, but they were not normal.
"What happened to you, Bay." Emily asked concerned, taking her legs in her hands so she could look closer at her daughter's bruises.
"I don't know, I think I fell." The little girl answered, putting her arms around her body to make herself seem smaller.
"Do you think you fell, or you did you fall, baby? You have to be careful, sweetheart." Emily said, as she examined Bay's entire body.
Bay was three years and some months old and was very tall for a child her age, but she was also very skinny, Emily had questioned several pediatricians about her height and weight, but they all seemed to think it was normal and she was within the normal range for her age. In fact, they told Emily most healthy children were slim, and there were many countries trying to fight obesity in kids, and that was something that was somewhat upsetting to Emily. She definitely didn't want Bay to be obese, but she didn't want her to be skin and bones either. Emily's mother told her all the time that Bay was just as skinny as she had been when she was her age, and Emily shouldn't be concerned. Still Emily's motherly instinct make her really concerned because Bay had gotten sick a lot recently. Bay had been a very healthy child for the first couple of years of her life, but a few months ago, Emily had noticed that Bay had been sick more than usual and that really concerned her. The pediatrician kept telling her that everything was fine, but something in the back of her mind made her really concerned.
Once Emily was finished examining her daughter's entire body, they got in the shower and had some mother and daughter time playing with the foam and water. After that, they both settled down to eat dinner.
"What's on your mind, sweetheart?" Max asked Emily, worried since he knew all of her expressions.
"I think I'm just tired." She said, squeezing his hand gently. Max leaned forward to press a kiss on her lips.
"Are you sure?"
"Did Bay fall today?" Emily asked, unable to stop her self.
"No, why?" Max suddenly turned his attention to the three year old who was working on her dinner.
"There are some bruises on her legs, and she doesn't know where she got them." Emily replied, concerned. She wasn't trying to sound accusatory because she knew for a fact Max would never hurt their daughter since he was an amazing father. Still, working in the field she did for many years, she couldn't stop herself from questioning these kinds of things.
Max stood up and took a look at his daughter's bruising, he hadn't noticed the bruising, but that was because she was wearing school pants, and he knew she had not fallen at home, but knowing his daughter and how hyper she was, she had probably fallen down at school.
"She probably fell at school Em, you know Bay is very active, I'm sure it's nothing." Max told his wife, taking her hand and kissing it.
"I know, I just worry, you know." Emily stated, again looking at the beautiful raven-haired little girl who was now playing with her chicken dinner. There was something inside her that told her she should be worried and she didn't know why.
When dinner was over, Emily and Max put Bay to bed together, after they read her a story. They both headed to the room they shared talking for a while and then Emily fall asleep in his arms, she was just too tired to stay awake. Emily also knew she neglected Max a lot, and she didn't want to blame her job because she didn't want to be that kind of wife, but the reality was her job took so much time from her, and when she was home, her attention completely shifted toward Bay. That left little to no time for Max. However, he had never complained, he was truly amazing to her, and he was always there for her...she just wished she could love him back the same way he loved her. But she simply couldn't, and she didn't know why.
The next day, Emily left home earlier than usual, she had an important meeting at Interpol with the directors, and she knew that would take most of her morning. Max took care of dropping Bay off to school and then he headed to work. It was a normal day...he had to design several projects and a few meetings, but nothing very important, so most of the morning went by quietly, until around noon when Max received a call from L'Ecole Des Petits, Bay's school. Normally, they called Emily but he knew she was at a very important meeting that morning, and she wasn't going to have her phone with her.
The director of the school called telling Max that Bay had fallen on the school playground, and she had a cut on her head...nothing huge or terrifying, but they were having difficulty stopping the blood so they had rushed Bay to the hospital. Max felt like his heart was torn apart; he immediately rushed from his office and didn't even bother canceling his meetings or events that day. He just wanted to rush to the hospital and see his baby girl. When he arrived at the hospital, the doctors assured him Bay was fine and it had been a minor cut, they, however, were concerned because Bay had lost a lot of blood, and it wasn't normal for a cut that small. They reassured him they would do a blood transfusion for Bay since the amount of blood she had lost had been very concerning, and they wanted to keep her there long enough for several other tests.
Max wanted to see Bay so badly he almost fought with one of the doctors at the hospital, but he knew he also needed to remain calm and try to contact Emily. He didn't want to scare her since he was already there but, he knew Emily needed to know what was going on, and she would kill him if he didn't call her as soon as possible. He called her a couple of times and finally decided to send her a text explaining briefly what had happened. Max knew her meeting was super important and he had her work number, but he didn't want to get her out of the meeting when he was already with their daughter and she was stable. When she got out of her meeting, she would see his text message and would call him...for now all he could do was wait.
A while later, Emily's meeting was over and she was happy to be done. These meetings were usually stressful and very tiring; she still had a long day but for now, she wanted to grab a bite to eat and call Max and her mother. She and Clyde made their way out the long conference room and headed toward Emily's office.
"I think you owe me lunch." Emily teased.
"Oh, really, is that so?" Clyde asked, with a big smile.
"Yes, it's because of you that I put up with all this bureaucratic crap." She pointed out. That made Clyde.
"Fine, you're lucky you're cute and I like you."
Emily punched his arm playfully and walked inside her office.
"Let me just grab my phone and purse." Emily said, as she reached her drawer and grabbed her purse, pulling out her phone, then realizing she had several calls from Bay's school and from Max's phone, her heart immediately dropped. Checking quickly through her messages, she suddenly wanted to die when she saw her husband's text.
"Oh my God." She said in a shaky voice.
"Something has happened to Bay, they rushed her to the emergency room." Emily said in a barely audible voice.
"Let's go...now!" Clyde said immediately, taking Emily's purse and putting an arm around her because by the look of her face, she was about to pass out.
Clyde got them to the emergency room in less than ten minutes, and as soon as he parked the car, he and Emily both rushed into the hospital. They quickly made their way to the children's section where they saw Max pacing around.
"Max, what happened?" Emily begged, walking toward her husband with tears rolling down her cheeks.
"She is okay, darling, she fell on the playground and got a small cut." Max told her, trying to sound as calm as he could so he didn't freak out his wife.
"What do you mean a cut and how did she fall?" Emily asked, raising her voice.
"The teacher told me she was at recess, and they were on the playground where she slipped and fell to the ground, where she got a small cut but they couldn't stop the bleeding." Max explained gently.
"Oh my God, I want to see her, please." Emily begged, unable to stop the sobs that were coming from her mouth.
"They're running some tests on her now, but we'll see her as soon as they're finished." Max reassured her, pulling his wife into his arms.
"Tests for what...what the hell is going on, Max, I want to see my daughter NOW!?" Emily screamed crying.
"Just calm down, please, darling, she is fine...everything is going to be fine." Max said, pulling her into his arms again and hugging her tightly to him, as she cried in his arms.
A few hours later the, doctor came out of the doors.
"Mr. and Mrs. Olsen, I'm Dr Morrison." He stated, walking toward them.
"What's going on with my daughter?" Emily asked, raising her voice.
"Bay is fine, Mrs Olsen, we had to give her a couple of stitches, and she's fine now." Dr. Morrison said.
"You may see her as soon as the nurses are finished with the bandages and cleaning her up."
The doctor added, "However, there is something else we're worried about."
"What's going on?" They asked, holding hands.
"We want to run some more tests on Bay; the amount of blood she lost isn't normal and there are some bruises on her body that gave us some concern. Bay said she fell because she was dizzy, which raised even higher concerns." Dr Morrison further explained.
"What does this mean?" Emily asked, feeling a knot beginning in her stomach along with difficulty breathing.
"At this moment, we're not certain, however, we do need to run a blood test on both parents." Dr Morrison informed them.
"Why, what does Bay's fall and subsequent blood loss have to do with us?" Max asked concerned.
"It's actually protocol, and we just need to see the compatibility of blood cells in case Bay needs another blood transfusion." Dr Morrison explained to the couple.
"Absolutely, I'll give my daughter anything she needs." Max stated without hesitation.
However, Emily felt her heart starting to beat a hundred miles a minute, and she didn't know why.
A/N
Now, Dear Readers, I know you're confused thinking this hasn't really been a Hotch/Emily story, but we had to give you a background to see where Hotch/Emily were coming from. You have now been introduced to Bay Arian, Emily's beautiful, raven-haired, dimpled daughter, and now the best is yet to come. We also split this chapter in two sections so we didn't make it a novel in the middle of a story. We'll try to get the second half of this chapter to you very soon.
In addition to that, I'm back in school, so I have to fit my writing into my school, work and volunteer schedule, but since writing is my stress-reducing past time, I plan to make you the beneficiaries of my past time...lol.
Happy Reading!
