Unforgettable Nights, Unforgivable Mistakes

Chapter 25: Scared to Death

It had now been more than six hours since they had taken Bay in for surgery, and Emily was close to having a breakdown. She hadn't even had a chance to see her daughter after she had fainted, and they had taken her in for emergency surgery. Dr. Bergman told Emily Bay's system was too weak to wait any longer, and if they didn't act immediately to place the bone marrow transplant Bay could die. It was the worst news a parent could ever receive, and Emily had been crying hysterically since they had taken her daughter into surgery, and as much as the team was trying to calm her down, they simply couldn't. After the fight between Clyde and Aaron, and the doctors telling them they were rushing Bay in for surgery, they found themselves calling anyone they remembered that could come help, or at least that could be there to support their friends. The entire team was there, of course, with no questions, and Elizabeth, too, had arrived shortly after the surgery started.

There wasn't really much they could do but just be there for her. It was difficult for everyone to see their best friend in that state. Emily was a mess, she found herself unable to stop crying, and while she had tried to remain strong over the last couple of months, tonight she simply couldn't take it. She was crying from desperation and from anger, she should have done something before her daughter got this sick, she should have acted sooner. She kept trying to think of all the ways she had failed Bay, and even though her friends kept telling her it wasn't her fault and she had done everything she could to help Bay, she simply didn't listen to them. She knew that if something ever happened to Bay she could never forgive her self, and she knew Aaron would never forgive her. She didn't really give a damn about him or how he felt, but she knew if Bay didn't make it, he would hate her forever. But it truly didn't matter for her, yes he might still love him and care for him, but Bay was her life and her entire world, without her she simply didn't think she could live. Maybe that was too dramatic, but that was how she felt…if something happened to Bay, she would shoot her self in a heartbeat. Without her daughter she just didn't have any reason to live.

Clyde tried to make her eat something or even drink water or tea, but they couldn't get her to do anything, it was as is she was suddenly lost. She just sat there in a chair crying and praying; she didn't respond or talk to anyone, even when her mother arrived, she just had no energy for anything, all her mind and thoughts were in that surgery room with Bay. It was heartbreaking and depressing to see her like this, even for Aaron who was watching from a few feet away. It pained him to see her in so much pain and agony. He was very worried and desperate, but the truth was he had only been in Bay's life for a few months, so, he could only imagine what it was for Emily to be going through this. She had carried the little girl in her womb for nine months, then she had raised her and taken care of her for the past four years, and as much as he hated to admit it, Emily had done a lovely job with Bay. Aaron had an opportunity to spend a lot of time with Bay and the more he discovered about her, the prouder he was that Emily was her mother. The little girl was a carbon copy of Emily, she was beautiful and smart, and she was driven and even stubborn. She knew exactly what she wanted and how she wanted it, yet she was sweet natured and a loving little girl. She was by far the most well-mannered and polite little girl Aaron had ever met, and she had Prentiss written all over her. She was intriguing and captivating, she knew how to read and write for her young age, she was interested in so many things. She could make Aaron smile so easily, she was adorable in so many ways. But most of all, she loved her mother more than anything; Aaron saw that right away…Bay did nothing but talk about Emily and all the things they did together, and all the things Emily bought for her, the games they played, the stories she read her, Emily was simply her hero and her entire life. Bay worshiped Emily and Aaron was proud of that, he couldn't have asked for a better mother for his little girl, and he knew that despite not knowing about Bay for so long, Emily had done a remarkable job with her. He just wished he could be part of that, a part of her little world…Emily knew every story, every wound, every memory, her first words, her fist steps...everything in his little girl's life, Emily knew down to a science, her entire happiness was wrapped around Emily. He was happy for that, but it really hurt him that Bay didn't even know who he was...it really stung, and although he knew it was all his own damn fault, it still hurt.

Clyde was right about everything, it was all his fault, he should have treated her like the beautiful lady she was and like she deserved to be treated; he should have wowed her with roses and amazing words and treated her like a queen. Emily left and ran away with his daughter, because he had made her do so, he had treated her so badly that he had made her run away and hide his daughter from him, and now here he was looking like and idiot in front of everyone, looking like a loser…everyone had heard the fight between him and Clyde, and he knew they all agreed with Clyde, he was a piece of scum, and he had no right to come here and demand anything from Emily.

He watched sadly as Emily got up from her seat and walked away. He knew she couldn't take it anymore, and that she was desperate and probably dying inside, he just wished he could comfort her and tell her everything would be fine. He, too, stood up from his chair, excusing himself to go to the bathroom and quickly tried to go after her, but he had no idea where she had gone. He walked around the hospital aimlessly for a while, searching for her until finally he could her soft sobs coming from the chapel. He walked inside slowly and saw her in the very front pew crying and praying silently; it truly was heartbreaking for him. He slowly made his way to the first pew and sat close beside her. He didn't want to scare her or disturb her, he just wanted to see if she needed anything. Emily was aware of his presence from the minute he opened the doors, and now she could smell his cologne, she knew it was him and honestly, he was the last person she wanted there.

"Please go away, Aaron...I just want to be alone." She begged, still crying in her arms.

"I want to pray for her, too, you know, she is my daughter, too, Emily." She didn't say anything, she just kept praying silently and tried to ignore him.

"I know all of this is my fault, but I know nothing about her...what she likes, what she's allergic to, her favorite books, her favorite food." He said, as a single tear rolled down his cheek.

"I'm a complete stranger to her, all she does is talk about you, she will never know who I am, I'll never forgive myself for that." Tears were finally running freely from his eyes, and that got Emily's attention, and she sat back down on the bench of the chapel and looked at him. He was looking down at the floor, although the tears were evident in his eyes.

"She does know who you are." Emily said sadly.

"No, she doesn't, I'm some random guy that comes to visit her, you, on the other hand, are her hero, her entire life, you're part of every little story in her past, all of it."

"You can be part of her future." Emily said, looking at him with tear in her eyes.

"Shellfish." Emily said suddenly.

"What!?" Aaron asked, raising his eyes to meet hers.

"She is allergic to shellfish and kiwis." Emily continued.

"I'm allergic to kiwis, too." He responded, astonished.

"She likes the "Cat in the Hat", but she mostly loves books about horses. I swear I don't know where she got it from, but she loves horses in all sizes and shapes."

"I knew that." Aaron smiled timidly.

"Let's see, she weighed about seven pounds when she was born, she took about twenty-five hours to get here." She remembered as if it was yesterday when she was born.

"Oh wow! Jack only took six hours." Aaron said, surprised.

"The doctors wanted to go in and get her, but I knew she would come when she was ready, and that is how she is, you can't rush her to do anything, she does things at her own pace, but she is so smart you'll be surprised." Emily smiled softly…Aaron, too, couldn't help himself and smiled too.

"She started walking when she was eight months, she fell several times before she finally did it, but she was so determined to it. She is so stubborn I swear I don't know where she got that from." Emily kept talking; it felt so good to talk about this and have positive thoughts, so she just kept going.

"I can guess who she got it from." Aaron joked.

"She is like you in so many things, it's so annoying." Emily gave Aaron a warm smile.

"She is a perfectionist, even at her young age, she is the sweetest kid, but she has this frown when she is upset that I swear I feel like I'm looking at you, she is a complete enigma sometimes, she is truly an overachiever and when she sets her mind on something, there is nothing that stops her, she looks like she has this huge wall in front of her. She pushes people away especially when she is upset, but she is so lighthearted and gentle, she has such an amazing heart." Emily kept talking about her daughter non-stop as Aaron listened to her without missing a single word she was saying.

"She sounds like such an amazing child, you truly have done a lovely job with her, you have raised such a wonderful little girl." Aaron said, looking at her gently.

Emily just looked away as tears rolled down her face.

"If something happens to her, I'll die, I'll kill myself...I won't be able to live without her." She finally sobbed.

"Don't say that Emily, please, she's going to be fine. You need to be strong, for her you need to be strong." Aaron took her hand gently and together they prayed for their daughter; maybe this was an odd moment to be friends and stay together, but they needed it.

After they ended their prayers, Aaron helped Emily off the floor, and they started to walk out of the chapel.

"Thank you for doing this, the bone marrow...I don't have the words to thank you and to show you what this means to me." Emily said, wiping her eyes.

"She's my daughter, Emily, it's the least I can do for her, I owe her that much."

As they were about to walk out the chapel, Dr. Bergman walked in; he looked exhausted and he was sweating, making Emily's heart immediately drop. His face looked somewhere else. Oh God, no, please, Emily begged internally.

"Ms. Prentiss, I've been looking for you everywhere, your friends said you would be here, I have something very important to tell you." His words were long and sounded dreadful.

"Oh my God, is Bay okay? Is my baby fine." Emily's heart was paralyzed and so did Aaron's…he found it difficult to breathe, and Emily felt her knees give.

"No, Bay is fine, don't worry, we just need your permission and signature to place her on a different floor." He explained tiredly.

"Another room?" She asked with a shaky voice.

"Well, I think the recovery room on the second floor will be much better fit for all of you, it is much larger." Dr. Bergman explained.

"Recovery room?" Both parents asked in unison.

"Yes, the recovery room. Everything went great with the surgery, and we think in a couple of months Bay will be able to resume a normal life...if everything progresses well with the transplant." Dr. Bergman said, and finally smiled.