Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon a Time and am just borrowing the characters
Chapter 4-Graduation and After
Emma sat anxiously in the high school auditorium. Henry's graduation started in a few minutes. She was seated at the end of the second row next to Kili with Mary Margaret. Charming was beside his wife with Leo on his lap and Neal next to him. Roland, Robin with little Kerry on his lap were next, followed by two open seats with Catie, Colin and Belle finishing out the row. She assumed Killian and Regina were with Henry since she noticed when she looked around that family groups had people missing.
"It is tradition for parental photographs to be taken before the ceremony before rejoining their families," Mary Margaret explained in a low voice. Emma swallowed hard. 'Parental pictures' how she wished she could be included in that. It was her own fault she was not and that bothered her more than she wanted to admit. She had no right to feel sorry for herself when she had chosen to leave. Henry had at least sought her out to witness this moment.
Kili tapping on her arm pulled her out of her thoughts. He had been busy talking with Colin and Catie. "Can I sit with Miss Belle, Colin and Catie?"
"Killian will be sitting there."
"Captain Killian," he corrected her. "Colin says his Daddy won't mind. He will just sit on Captain Killian's lap. Miss Belle said it was okay if you said yes."
"Miss Belle?" she repeated, glancing down at the librarian who nodded that it was okay. She gave Kili a nudge and he happily bounced back to sit between the dark haired twins, looking for all the world like a slightly older brother. "Captain Killian? Miss Belle?" she repeated again.
Charming laughed lightly. "Killian is a stickler for manners. It is disrespectful to call an adult by their given name. Last names are too formal for most of us so we settled for a title as acceptable. Mayor Regina, Deputy or Mr. Robin, Captain Killian, Ms. Red, Dr. Victor, etc." Sheepishly he shrugged. "It just caught on and most of the kids use them now."
"If they don't," Robin chimed in, and Emma noticed Kerry had moved over to share a seat with Colin, "the other kids correct them. It is 'Bad Form' not to respect your elders," his voice mimicked Killian's accent.
"There is nothing wrong with good manners," Killian's voice, slightly rougher than usual commented as he and Regina joined them. His hand rested lightly on the mayor's back. Her eyes appeared damp. They took the two vacant seats next to each other as the kids scrunched together, trying to fit four kids in two seats. Absently Killian reached out and pulled Kerry onto his lap, one arm holding her secure around the middle as she turned to sit sideways to face her friends.
David outright laughed. "It is not manners but some of the titles given after the Moppets got a hold of Henry's storybook."
"Moppets?" Emma repeated, feeling like she was doing that quite often.
With a nod of his head David signaled to the still talking children. "Add in Red and Victor's son and you have quite the creative crew."
"Moppets!" Colin, Catie and Kerry chorused gleefully.
Before anything else could be said the ceremony began. Pride and sorrow filled her as she saw how grown up Henry was in his cap and gown. She was hardly aware of the ceremony, focusing only on Henry. She could feel her eyes filling as he stepped onto the stage to receive his diploma. "Henry Mills Jones." At the name her eyes shot quickly to Regina and Killian. Robin had slipped an arm around Regina's shoulders while Belle had stretched her arm behind the kids to rest her hand on Killian's shoulder. Most surprising Regina and Killian were clasping hands, a wide surprised smile on the pirate's face. Quickly she turned back to the stage, not wanting to miss any of Henry getting his diploma. As he was walking off the stage, diploma clutched tightly in his hand, Henry glanced at his family, smiling happily. His smile widened and he gave a quick nod to Regina and Killian. Emma did not think she had ever regretted leaving more.
When the ceremony was over Henry came over to accept hugs and congratulations. Emma couldn't help noticing how short her hug was and the brief 'thanks' she got to her, "Congratulations, Kid, I'm proud of you."
It was few moments before she realized Killian and Regina were standing a little apart, allowing all of Henry's family to share in his triumph. It wasn't long though before the graduate pulled away and walked over to them. "Mom, Dad."
As one the three moved, embracing. Emma's eyes went to Robin, who had a hand on Roland's shoulder and was holding Kerry with a contented smile on his face and Belle, who was holding Colin and Catie's hands, tears in her eyes and a happy smile on her face. The trio was taking a step back when she turned back to them. "Why?" Killian asked, a hand still holding Henry's shoulder.
"In every way that matters you have been my Dad for years. You had no reason to be. You even made sure I had my own space in your house while Belle was pregnant with your true children."
"That has never mattered," Killian stated.
"That's why," Henry said. "You love me the same as Colin and Catie. You are there whenever I need you, even if I don't know I do." He glanced at Regina. "I talked to Mom first and she agreed."
Regina laid a hand on his shoulder. "You have more than earned it."
Killian hugged him again. "Thank you. You do know that Colin and Catie are going to be even more impossible about their now official big brother?"
That broke the solemnity and the rest of the family rejoined them, Colin and Catie indeed bragging about their big brother, the graduate.
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The graduation party, which it seemed most of the town was attending, was at Killian and Belle's house. It was by the sea with the Jolly anchored near, not that that was a surprise. The rest of the house, however, was. It was a nice sized house painted a soft green. There was a sprawling backyard that led to a sand beach. The yard itself was a child's dream. There were several good climbing trees, one with a treehouse 'I helped build it' David gleefully told her, a play set with slides, swings, tire swing, swinging bars, rings and a climbing wall 'We put together multiple sets' Henry proudly informed her, a trampoline, sandbox, and a second story deck that looked perfect for jumping from. There was also what appeared to be a good sized sledding hill at the back of the property.
"Killian and Belle have the preferred house to play at," Ruby commented to Emma, watching as her son raced to join the other kids playing what appeared to be a complex game of tag on the play set. Victor followed after to join Killian, Robin, David, Phillip, and who she guessed were some other fathers supervising. "It was how they got roped into hosting the annual high school graduation party. This year they at least have a graduate."
Emma surveyed the yard. There were picnic tables set up all around, tables brimming with food, coolers filled with drinks, several grilles set up and more people than she knew lived in Storybrooke wandering around. "That seems like a lot of work for one family."
Ruby laughed, "but it is not one family." She nodded to Grumpy who was currently manning one of the grilles. "The local restaurants and stores supply the food and drinks, we will take turns on cooking detail. Several of the guys came out earlier to help set up and others will help tear down tomorrow morning." She led Emma over to the drinks and pulled out a beer for both of them, nodding absently at Ashley, who was currently supervising the coolers to be sure the kids did not take from the wrong ones. "I am so glad Victor and I decided to stay here."
At that Emma's eyes shot to her. "People can come and go?"
Still watching the children Ruby nodded. "Killian has to lower the barrier, but people can leave and return. Few people have left and most of those have returned. It opens up a lot more possibilities to our young people. I believe Henry has been accepted to colleges in a few other states."
Slowly Emma sank down into a chair. She could have visited, she could have found a way to keep in touch. Everything began to swim. Suddenly familiar warm hands were holding hers. A touch she had missed for years. For a moment Emma clung to Killian then gave herself a shake. She was Emma Swan, she did not get overwhelmed or need help. "I'm fine."
"No," he stated implacably, but quietly, in a voice she doubted would carry beyond them. "You are not." He pulled her to her feet and unobtrusively led her inside and up a flight of stairs. She was pushed down in a chair and a minute later a cold rag placed on the back of her neck. "Take deep breaths," he commanded, setting his own breathing so she could follow. An unknown amount of time later the drowning sensation faded away completely. She looked up to find Killian sitting at the end of a king size bed, watching her. "Care to tell me what caused a full blown panic attack?"
To avoid his eyes Emma looked around the room she was in. The floors were hardwood with beige walls. There were bedside tables to either side of the bed, each with pictures and a book resting on it. The chair she was in was matched by another and a table to make a nice reading nook. There was a dresser and a couple of bookshelves stuffed with books, knick-knacks and pictures. Rising she walked to the bookshelves looking closer at the pictures. They included Robin, Regina and their family, David and his kids, the dwarves and others on the Jolly Roger. There was even a picture of the two of them at the loft. Moving to the bedside table there were pictures of Colin, Catie and Henry and a family photo that included him and Belle. "You've built a good life."
Killian rose to stand next to her, also looking at the pictures. "Life did not end when you left. I had to keep moving forward or the Darkness would overtake me again."
"You aren't Dark," she stated firmly, wondering if he was still fighting his self-doubts.
His answer was immediate and sure. "No, I am not. But I have a tendency to make bad decisions in that type of situation." He turned to face her. "Now tell me what that was all about."
Turning she walked back to the chair, sinking down on it. She couldn't speak, she was not even sure she could define her feelings to herself.
Killian sat down on the chair next to her. "Shall I tell you?"
Staring down at her hands Emma nodded. Killian had often known her better than she knew herself and he did not hesitate to call her on her hidden motives. It was one of the things she had always loved about him and that had equally scared her.
"You ran. You let your walls and your fears win. It was hard when you were away but easier not to think about what you left behind. Kili and your new life could be used to fill your thoughts and those empty places. Nights and holidays would be the worst, but they could be ignored in the light of day. Now you are back and you see how much you missed and it is painful. To make matters worse you find that people can come and go from town."
"I could have stayed in touch," she whispered.
"No," Killian replied, taking her hands and squeezing them. "You were running. If you had known about the town line you would have felt even worse about not being able to come back." He tilted her head up so their eyes could meet. "It does give you more options now. Even if you do not stay you do not have to lose contact with your family." He rose. "Take as much time as you need. Rejoin us when you are ready."
She turned to watch him leave. "Kil-"
He turned at the door. "No one will disturb you." He pulled the door closed as he left.
Once he was gone Emma slumped back in the chair. She was not one for introspection, she actually spent a lot of time trying to avoid it. Maybe it was time to stop running in all ways. The last time she had stopped had led to the happiest time in her life. While she could not go back she could find a way to go forward. In fact she had to if she did not want to lose Henry and her family. Laughter pulled her on to the balcony. Kili was on the swings with Colin, Killian pushing them both while talking with David, who was supervising the climbing wall. As she watched Colin jumped off the swing and Kili followed him laughing loudly as they raced to the treehouse. And she wanted Kili to know this, the love and safety of family.
Immediately her fears started to overwhelm her. She can't be home, she can't be a part of a family. It will hurt her too much. She can't hurt her family when she gets overwhelmed and flees again. Everyone, including the town, has done just fine without her. No one needs her. Her arms wrap tightly around herself as Kili jumped off the treehouse ladder and into his grandfather's arms. Kili deserved better than a lonely apartment with no family but his mother. Why should her wonderful little boy be punished because of her? But how could she abandon him? Even if it was to give him a better life.
"You have to figure out how to stop running sometime."
Emma whirled at the familiar-yet unfamiliar- voice to see her firstborn standing in the now open doorway. "Henry."
He strolled into the room, leaning against the railing to look down at the party. "Dad said to give you time, but that I would know when to come."
Closing her eyes she turned away from her son. Her child that she had given up and then run from. "He is a good man."
The smile Henry wore was audible in his voice. "The best." She could feel his eyes on her but refused to turn, unable to see the pain and hurt in his eyes when he looked at her. "One of the most important, and hardest, lessons he taught me was about choice. In the end we each have to make our own choices and take responsibility for them. Others may influence our choices, but in the end it is still our choice." He hesitated a moment, as though a new thought had occurred to him. "Maybe that's why Killian's transition from villain was easier. He took responsibility for what he did from the beginning. And was willing to admit his errors and correct his mistakes to the best of his ability." After a moment he shook the thought from his mind, not the time. "You decided to leave all those years ago and are now facing the consequences. What you need to think about is do you want to face them again if you choose to run again?" He turned back to the kids playing and adults talking and laughing below. "There is no longer a memory curse around the town line. Kili will remember this."
"Killian controls the barrier. He could make him forget, it would save him the pain of remembering his time here."
Henry took a couple of steps back, a look of horror on his face. "Dad would never steal a child's memory! To force him to live a lie." Pain filled his voice as he backed away. "Why don't you just leave Kili here when you run? At least he will have what is best for him put first. I never should have asked Dad to find you. Who knows, maybe Dad will erase your memories if you ask." He fled the room.
For the longest time Emma just stared at the door he had vanished through. Where had that come from? She would never want to steal Kili's memories of his family! She sank down onto the tile of the balcony. What had she turned into?
She was still sitting there when Regina stormed into the room. "What the hell are you thinking, Ms. Swan? This is a big day for Henry, did you have to try and ruin it?"
She lifted her tear filled gaze to meet the ire coming from the former Evil Queen. "I didn't mean to," she whispered.
Primly sitting on the padded beach chair Regina continued to glare at her. "Killian is with him and will straighten him out. You, however, need to straighten yourself out."
"I don't know how."
Rolling her eyes in exasperation Regina rose. "Choose. Make your decision and accept the consequences." Her eyes closed a moment. "Damn, now I sound like the Pirate Sheriff." With a quick shake of her head she looked back at Emma. "You made the wrong choice six years ago and are only now realizing how steep the consequences are. Try to make a better choice this time." She walked to the door. "Fifteen minutes then rejoin the party. This is Henry's day and he deserves it." Her tone brooked no argument as she left.
Emma just stared at the door, feeling completely lost, alone and confused.
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A few hours later she found herself feeling much better. The sun was almost fully set and she was sitting on a deck chair next to her parents, Robin, Regina, Ruby, Victor, Belle, with Killian perched on the arm of her chair and Granny. Around them the other residents were in their own groups. The children had retreated inside to watch movies and play video games. The graduates had taken over the treehouse. She took another sip of her beer. While not drunk she was pleasantly relaxed and had lost track of the conversation as she enjoyed the easy companionship. Some people had started to leave but a great many were still present.
"Can we take the Jolly out?" Henry and a couple of the other graduates had approached the group.
Killian eyed the group. "Have you cleared it with your parents?" After a few moments some of the kids broke off to find their parents. "Midnight," he told them. His gaze turned to Henry. "You remember how to sail without the tides?"
With a wide grin he nodded.
"Have fun and remember the rules."
Robin turned to Killian. "How long?"
The former pirate smirked in reply, stretching his legs out. "Fifteen minutes." Belle shifted slightly so the chair did not topple.
David and Victor laughed while the ladies just shook their heads. "Fifteen minutes what?" Emma asked.
"Just wait." Regina leaned her head on Robin's shoulder. At Killian's look she shook her head at him. "Have fun."
The conversations started again but Emma noticed the guys kept glancing at their watches. "Time," they chorused together.
Killian's smile widened as he closed his eyes in concentration. A bottle appeared in David's lap and one in Victor's while a cooler appeared in front of Robin. A cooler Emma had noticed Ruby placing by her chair earlier disappeared. He opened his eyes, "well?"
David sniffed the unlabeled bottle in his lap. "Vodka."
Holding his bottle up Victor said, "tequila."
Robin was going through the cooler. "Beer, water and mixers." He glanced up at Killian. "Did you get it all?"
Killian had a self-satisfied smirk on his face as he rested his arm on the back of the chair. "Left a rum bottle filled with water."
Ruby was shaking her head. "You think they would learn by now, especially if they think they found a bottle of rum."
"Why are you laughing about it? That could be dangerous!" Emma exclaimed.
"Henry knows better," Regina stated. "I bet he was counting on Killian removing any liquor."
Giving the still lounging Killian a conspiring look Ruby added, "They were probably guessing you would do that but figured they had to try."
With a quick squeeze of Killian's leg Belle rose. "I will let the other parents know."
Killian rose as well, before the chair could tip over with the change in balance. "I'm going to go check on the kids. " He raised his voice slightly, centuries as a ship's captain gave him a voice that could carry without shouting when he chose. "Anyone want to help?"
Several of the other parents rose, including everyone else in their group. The playroom was a loft style attic Emma thought looked like a child's dream play place. It was split into two areas. In the first there was a large screen TV with movie theatre style chairs, a popcorn machine and mini-refrigerator in the corner. On the other side was a TV with several gaming systems , a couple of shelves stuffed full of books and board games, a couple bins of toys and a giant wooden toy box with cushions on it under the window and a building corner filled with Legos and Lincoln logs. "Play place of choice," Ruby leaned closer to her to repeat.
"I wish the kids went to bed half as well at home," Mary Margaret sighed, looking around at the kids collapsed on the various surfaces. Roland and a couple of his friends were playing Mario Kart quietly in the corner.
Robin, Victor, David, Grumpy, and Phillip were hauling already blown up air mattresses up the stairs while Nova, Ruby, Mary Margaret, and Ashley followed with blankets and Aurora, Billy and a few other parents brought pillows. "If your kids are going to stay go ahead and get them settled. Don't forget to sign the log that they are staying," Killian called out, lifting Colin into his arms.
Emma watched as various parents either carried their sleeping children downstairs or over to an air mattress. Killian, Victor, Robin and David carried their children down the stairs. "Is Kili staying?" Belle had joined them, dropping off more pillows.
"I don't want to impose."
The librarian directed her gaze around her at the various air mattresses filling up with sleeping children. Roughly twenty children were staying. "One more will not matter."
She was in the process of nodding when she noticed David carrying Kili out the door, Killian behind him with Catie. "Our kids bunk with Colin and Catie," Mary Margaret told her, leading her down the stairs. The room she entered was painted dark blue on the bottom and pale gray on the top, there was another wooden toy box with cushions to double as a window seat, bunk beds with underwater themed bedding, a shark lamp and more stuffed bookshelves. "Colin is enchanted with underwater creatures." Neal and Leo were on an air mattress, Kili and Mark (Ruby and Victor's son) were on the full size bottom bunk while Colin had the top bunk. After goodnights were said Killian flicked on a globe surrounded by a couple of dolphins as a night light before pulling the door almost all the way closed.
Robin, Regina and Belle exited the room next door. "We'll stay," Regina stated to David and Mary Margaret. "You stayed last year."
"We'll be back tomorrow to help with breakfast," Ruby commented. "We'll also take care of goodbyes."
Leroy joined them, an arm around Nova. "Granny is in the guest room downstairs. I will have the guys back around noon to help clean up."
Yawning Belle leaned against Killian tiredly, his arm going around her waist. "My room is ready," she told Robin and Regina.
Killian gave Belle a quick kiss on the cheek before nudging her toward his bedroom. "Go get into bed. I will just bring the coolers in and set the barrier around the house then I will be up."
At that Belle laughed. "You may come to bed but you will not go to sleep until the Jolly is docked and all the kids are home safe."
Killian grinned but said nothing as he went down the stairs.
As she followed David and Mary Margaret to their mini-van Emma wished she was able to stay. The home radiated love, family and togetherness.
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Emma found herself up just past dawn the next morning. She missed Kili. This was the first time he had ever slept apart from her. David and Mary Margaret were already up drinking coffee. "You could have slept in," David told her. "We were just going to help Killian and Belle with the morning exodus."
"I don't mind helping." She followed them up to the car. "I couldn't believe how kid-centric the house was."
"Henry started it. Shortly after they moved in while Belle was still pregnant he brought up always having wanted a treehouse. Once the treehouse was done Ruby had delivered and the Twins and Kerry were due shortly so they were talking about childcare. Granny liked the idea of watching them but needed a place to do so. Henry and Roland had a whole list of what they would have liked as little kids. Gradually, over the course of a couple of years you saw the result. That play set is a result of several of us getting together, Killian and Henry started but the number of sets used and people building it grew. Geppeto was a great help with the plans and supervising. Granny and Ashley watch the kids that are too young for school a couple of days a week. Over the summer it extends to kids under twelve and Mary Margaret and Frederick help out," David explained.
For a moment Emma was silent, closing her eyes in thought. "If I do go back to Chicago would Kili be able to visit, even if I can't, or at least not for as long?"
Mary Margaret turned to look at her. "Both of you will always be welcome. Have you decided to go back to Chicago?" she asked in a small voice.
Without opening her eyes Emma shook her head. "Not yet. But I do know whatever I decide I do not want to lose contact again." She didn't have to look to know both her parents were smiling.
