As soon as Magnus turned 17, he moved out of Ragnor's and found his own place to live, deciding that he was going to find his own way. Moving out had been one of the hardest things Magnus had ever done, and he was determined to not let Ragnor see that. The kindness Ragnor had shown him over the years had been nothing short of the most meaningful thing Magnus could think of. Ragnor had grown to mean absolutely everything to him, and Magnus had begun to think of Ragnor as an older brother.

Sure, over the years they'd had their arguments, but Magnus had come to understand that that was completely natural. Ragnor had taught him far more about love than he had ever imagined he would know, and Magnus had decided that he would never forget that.

Now, Magnus was moving out and into a place with what he thought to be the first love of his life. He'd been so elated when Elaine had responded to his love that he hadn't even paused to ask Ragnor about the hesitation he saw in the other man's eyes. There were just two problems with their relationship as it currently stood, and Magnus planned to ignore them both until he could do so no longer.

The first problem was that Magnus had yet to tell her that he was a warlock. He'd decided very early in the relationship that he would glamor himself until he got a feel for how things were going to work out. Yet the longer things went on, the more and more Magnus found himself thinking that it would be terribly awkward to tell her now, that she would be very angry.

The second problem was a bit more complicated than the first, considering the face that Magnus didn't exactly know what to make of it himself. He was beginning to slightly question his romantic attractions, but the most confusing part to him was that he knew he was still entirely attracted to women, which didn't make sense to him when he started realizing that he was attracted to men as well. This was such a foreign thought to him that Magnus often put it in the back of his mind and decided to save it for a rainy day. He knew that the punishment for homosexuality during this time was just as bad as the punishment for witchcraft, and he didn't even want to think about what the might do to him if they found out his attractions were equal both ways.

So Magnus decided that the best course of action was to keep everything from Elaine, despite Ragnor's constant protestation that he needed to show her exactly who he was. Magnus knew that he should listen to Ragnor, everything inside of him begged him to do so, but the thought of how she might react kept him from doing so. And now here he was, lying on the bed beside of her, wondering if things would ever be completely honest between them again.

"Magnus, darling?" Elaine said, pulling Magnus out of his thoughts. "You look so deep in thought. What could you possibly be thinking about that would take you that far away from me?" Magnus couldn't help but smile at her question. He knew that this was the perfect opportunity to tell her absolutely everything, but he knew himself well enough to know that he wouldn't take that opportunity.

"I was just thinking about your beauty," he flirted effortlessly, rolling over on his side to face her. Magnus felt joy well within him when Elaine's smile brought light to her face. He idly wondered if this was what true love felt like, but he pushed that away, having taught himself to never hope for love.

Before Elaine could respond, before Magnus had any time to further contemplate their relationship, there was a bloodcurdling scream outside that was followed by silence that seemed louder than the scream itself. Magnus didn't need to get up and investigate to know that there were demons outside of the house, he'd been around enough demon attacks to know what they sounded like.

The world froze when Magnus realized that the only way he would be able to protect either of them from demons was to use his magic against them. The only problem with that was that the tiny fact that that would mean showing Elaine exactly who he was. Just as Magnus turned to her to motion for her to stay there, Magnus heard the front door cave in. Before he could think about it, Magnus was on his feet, sneaking out of the bedroom door as quickly as possible.

After that moment, Magnus didn't have time to stop and think any longer. He either had to fight back or die, and the second was not a viable option. Magnus got lost in the fight after that, his head no longer on whether or not Elaine might be watching, what she might be thinking of him. As soon as the demon was incapacitated, however, Magnus turned to see Elaine standing in the doorway, her expression completely unreadable.

Or it was unreadable, at least, until Magnus began to walk toward her. "Do not come near me!" she all but screamed at him. When he stopped, she spoke again, her voice was much softer, but it was no less terrified. "What on earth was that, Magnus? What are you?" For a few moments, Magnus considered simply leaving, he thought about not even trying to explain things. Then he thought of all that Ragnor had taught him about not being ashamed of who he was, and he dove into the explanation.

The entire time Magnus was speaking, Elaine simply looked at him as though she'd lost someone she loved. When he was finished explaining things as best as he could, she seemed to explode once more. "I am leaving," she said without any hesitation. "Frankly, Magnus, you're disgusting. What would ever make you think that I would want to be in a relationship with a monster like yourself?" Magnus wanted to answer that he honestly had no idea, he wanted to tell her that he'd been wondering the same thing, but he couldn't do anything other than look down at the floor.

"I'll just be getting my things now, and I kindly ask that you stay away from me." Magnus simply sat down in the only chair that seemed to still be standing upright after his fight with the demon. He couldn't seem to move himself until Elaine walked out of bedroom and past him once more. "I don't ever want to see you again," she said with such finality that Magnus felt his chest tighten.

The next thing Magnus knew, he was knocking on Ragnor's door, trying desperately to believe that everything that had just happened had been a nightmare. "What's wrong?" Ragnor asked as soon as he opened the door. Before that moment, Magnus had resolved that he was not going to break down; he had thought that he would simply tell Ragnor what had happened. But the fact that Ragnor immediately knew that Magnus was hurt was too much for him to handle.

Instead of trying to change Magnus's mind, instead of trying to change how Magnus felt, Ragnor simply allowed him to talk. It was like he knew there would be no chance of helping Magnus immediately. When Magnus was finally done talking, however, Ragnor said only one thing to him.

"Magnus, I know you don't believe me, but one day you will find someone who doesn't care about you being a warlock, someone who thinks that this is just a part of who you are." Magnus looked up to see that Ragnor had a soft smile on his face, which only made Magnus more upset for reasons that he couldn't explain. "Think of this heartbreak as practice. Think of this as trial and error. Then when the right person comes around, you'll be ready."

It suddenly hit Magnus that Ragnor hadn't said "woman," that he'd said "person," and Magnus looked up to see what Ragnor might have meant by that. It wasn't immediately evident to Magnus that Ragnor knew more than he was letting on, so Magnus decided to make no comment on the matter.

"You're not a monster, Magnus. But I understand that me sitting here and telling you that over and over again isn't going to help you feel any better." At that, Ragnor got up and began to walk toward his bedroom. "Feel free to stay here tonight, I don't mind. But Magnus," he said, turning around and giving Magnus an all too knowing look. "Whenever you do realize that I'm right, please come tell me so I can say, 'I told you so.'"


So this will probably have one more chapter to it before it's complete! Let me know what you're thinking of it, and be warned that what I have planned next is full of angst!