Love, Lies, and Loss
Disclaimer: I own no rights to One Tree Hill or any of its characters.
A/N: I'm so addicted to writing this fic its crazy! Also, thanks to some feedback I have reposted chapters 2-4. They now state how far into the future each chapter is. In case anyone is still confused, we are five years from the beginning chapter.
"Hey Brooke. We're gunna get going home. Are you riding home with us?" Haley asked.
"No, I think I'm going to stay a bit longer and try to get in a few words with Luke. Thank you Haley for being a good friend," Brooke hugged her.
"Thank you for helping out with Luke. Do you want me to bring Tegan with us or are you going to bring him back with you?"
"He can stay. Keith Jr. and him seem to get along very well."
"Like father, like son."
"Haley!"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
"It's okay. I know its hard for you to keep it from him. Thank you."
"Brooke, Luke is my best friend, but so are you. I'll see you later. Good luck," Haley took Zach by the hand and went to hunt down her husband.
"Luke, how you holding up?" Brooke sat next to him.
"Better than I was. It's amazing how much Anna brings me to life," Lucas's eyes searched the room for his daughter.
"Speaking of, there is someone I'd like you to meet." Brooke left for a moment and returned with her son.
"This is my son, Tegan."
"Hi, who are you?" The outgoing four year old asked.
"I'm Luke. It's nice to meet you Tegan. I see you've been playing with Anna. She is my daughter."
"That curly-headed girl? I wasn't playing with her. She was trying to play with me."
"Oh Tegan. You know you like playing with the girls just as much as you do the boys."
"Ewww…girls are gross," the child ran to discover yet another mess to get into.
"He's cute, looks a little like Anna," Lucas pondered for a moment.
"I think all those blonde haired, blue eyed kids look alike," Brooke quickly responded.
"How old is he?"
"Just turned four," Brooke lied, "I got pregnant right after I moved to New York. I met Brad and it was an instant click."
"Brad is who? Your husband? The one you might be getting a divorce from?"
"Brad is my husband and we are not getting a divorce."
"I thought you said he was pissed at you, wanted nothing to do with you, and your marriage was over."
"I was exaggerating, I hope."
"Lying some more huh?"
"I wasn't lying. We really haven't talked for two days. I'm going to call him when I get back to Haley's and see what's going on. My life was really good. I'm so scared that I might have ruined it all."
"Well, if he can't get over that one little secret, then you didn't mean that much to him to begin with."
"It's not just…" Brooke stopped herself.
"It's not just what?"
"Nothing. Never mind. It's not important. I should get going."
"Yeah, I should get Anna home too. She'll probably be glad to be back home."
"I'm sure she will. I'm sorry Luke. Everything is going to be okay. I know it."
"Thanks Brooke. When are you going home?"
"I guess that will be decided after I talk to Brad."
"Okay, well if you're here for a couple days, maybe we could get all the kids together. It would be nice for Anna to be around kids. It'd be nice for me to be around people too, keep my mind off things."
"So, do you forgive me yet? I really am sorry Luke. I never meant to hurt you or Peyton. I still loved you both when I left. I hope you know that. I didn't leave because of either of you, I left for myself."
"I don't know Brooke. A lot is going on right now. You're leaving soon anyways and you'll probably never be back so it doesn't much matter if I forgive you or not."
"It does matter Luke. You have always mattered. You will always matter. I don't think you are ready for me to leave yet anyway."
"I can't tell you anything right now. I'm so mixed up. I don't know what's going to happen with us or if I can ever forgive you, but I will try. It's going to take time. All of this stuff in my life is happening all at once. I need time to sort things out. I need time to not be angry with the world anymore. When I get past that, we can talk."
"It's a deal. I'll see you later Luke," Brooke gathered her child and took a cab back to the Scotts.
Brooke was ecstatic that she had made progress with Luke. He was still in a bad place, but he seemed to coming back to life. She hated seeing him in a dark place. It wasn't the Luke she remembered and it wasn't the Luke she wanted to see now. So far things were going good with Tegan. No one suspected and she only had to keep it going for a little longer. She wondered how much longer that would actually be. She couldn't leave Lucas, but she couldn't stay forever. She worried how her next conversation with her husband would end.
Brooke's hand was shaking as she hit speed dial number one.
"Hello?" Brad answered.
"Hi. How are you?"
"Fine. How's it going there?"
"Okay. Rough, but okay. It's nice to see people again."
"People like Lucas?"
"Brad, stop. We need to talk about this."
"What's there to talk about?"
"What's going on with us? You left without saying bye to me or your son."
"I was upset."
"And now?"
"What do you want me to say Brooke?"
"Whatever it is you want to say. I want to know what you're thinking. I want to know what's happening."
"You lied to me. It wasn't just a little white lie. It was a huge lie."
"I know and I'm sorry. I been saying this a lot lately, but I can't change what I've done."
"No, you can't. Have you told Lucas yet?"
"Told Lucas what?"
"About Tegan being his son."
"Brad! Tegan is YOUR son. He will always be YOUR son. Why are you being like this with me? You have never been like this before. What is wrong with you?"
"I'm just not so sure about us anymore."
"What do you mean? You're my husband and I love you. That's all there is to it."
"Sometimes love isn't enough Brooke. Sometimes relationships take more than love, like trust for example. I can't trust you anymore. I don't even know who you are anymore."
"You know me Brad. Nothing has changed other than Tegan's real father. Why is this such a big deal to you?"
"What have you been doing since you've been there? Catching up with old friends? Lucas maybe? You can't go the whole time with out seeing him. It was his wife that died. I'm sure you've talked to him."
"Of course I've talked to him. What does that have to do with us?"
"Why did you guys break up? Why did you leave? If I remember, it was Peyton. She's not there anymore. What's to stop you from falling back in love with him Brooke?"
"You. I….LOVE….YOU. You are my husband. Why it is so hard for you to accept the fact that I love you and I want you?"
"If there wasn't something about him, something deep inside of you, then you wouldn't have lied to me for all these years. I can't do it Brooke. I can't compete with your child's father. I can't compete with the love of your life."
"I'm not asking you to compete with anybody. I'm asking you to forgive me."
"No, I can't. I'll get my things when I get home from my trip. I'll get the divorce in the works and send you the papers."
"Brad? You can't do this. What about Tegan?" Tears were now streaming down Brooke's cheeks.
"I can do this. I love that child. I'll see to it that he adjusts well living with me."
"Fine, if you want to play dirty, we'll play dirty. You want to know the real me? I'll show it to you. If you want to do things this way, I'll make sure you never see Tegan again."
"He's my son. You can't take him from me."
"Yeah? As you keep reminding me, Lucas is Tegan's father. I'm sure when he finds out about him he's not going to let another man raise his child."
"You wouldn't."
"Oh…I would. Like the real me?"
"You should go into an acting career. You did a pretty good job of playing someone you weren't."
"What is this really about Brad? You can't seriously want to divorce me because of that one lie."
"It's not that you lied Brooke. It's the fact that you couldn't confide in me enough to tell me the truth. If you really love me that much, you would have told me. There has to be a reason why you couldn't tell me. What's the reason? Why couldn't you tell me?"
"I was scared that you'd leave me."
"Why would I leave you because you told me you knew who the father was? I would have rather known the truth than to have you tell me years later that I've gone all this time caring for another person's child. Someone who would have stepped up to the plate and taken care of his responsibility. You never gave him that chance. If he loved you at one time and you loved him, you could have made it work. You ran away from him when you needed him the most. What's to stop you from doing that to me? I love you Brooke, but I can't live with the worry that my wife is going to run off on me."
"I would never do that to you!"
"Just like you didn't do it to him? At least this way I know that we are getting out of it before you get pregnant with my child and let some another man raise him. Tegan might not be my blood, but I will have that child. You are not fit to raise him on your own."
"SCREW YOU BRAD! I am a damn good mother and there is no way in HELL I am letting you take my son from me! SEND ME THE PAPERS," Brooke screamed and slammed the phone down.
"Brooke? What's wrong," Haley came running into the room.
Brooke was sobbing as she fell into Haley's arms, "He wants a divorce. Brad…I called him. He wants a divorce Hails. He threatened to take Tegan from me."
"Oh honey. It's going to be okay. I'm here for you. We are not going to let him take your son away. After all, he isn't really Tegan's father."
"That would mean I'd have to tell Lucas the truth. Yet one more lie I've told and one more secret I've kept. I can't to it Haley. I can't tell him. He's got so much going on right now, he can't take this. I can hardly take this. I'll just give it time. Brad will cool off. He just needs time. He'll figure out he doesn't really want it to be this way."
"Are you so sure?"
"No…not really. He's never been like this. He's never yelled at me a day since we've met. He's so angry with me. I don't blame him. I lied. I told him I didn't know Tegan's father. I told him it was a one night stand. I couldn't tell him that his father was a man I was in love with. A man I had to leave because I couldn't bare the sight of him with another women. He's always thought Tegan's father meant nothing to me, that Tegan meant nothing to his father. For him to find out that he has a real father, a father who might actually want to take care of him, it must have broken his heart. What am I going to do Haley? I can't tell Lucas, but I can't let Brad take my son."
"We'll figure something out. You can stay here as long as you need to. If you like I can come with you to get your things."
"That's probably a good idea. I don't know if he'll calm down. He's gone from the house this week. I might want to get some things before he comes back. I don't think I can handle seeing him. Not in this state."
"Okay, we'll go this week then," Haley squeezed her best friend.
A/N: I love you guys! My readers are my inspiration. I am so glad everyone likes the story. I wasn't sure anyone would. It's been ages since I've written. Thank you all so much and keep reviewing! I love to hear what everyone thinks and what they would like to happen.
