*Updated* A/N: Christmas chapter! Merry Christmas everyone! This chapter takes place in current time and is about Cress. Last chapter was a prologue and took place in the past, and was showing when Cinder first discovered fanfiction. In this chapter, Cress has been on ff for years and in The Star Chronicles fandom.
THIS CHAPTER WAS WRITTEN BY ME (Cx3)!
Chapter 2- Where I am now
~)0(~
December 25th,
Well, today is Christmas, and I'm alone again. Maybe it's just better that way. Though I have to admit that I'm lonely. I think I'll call Kai after I write this, but he might be busy because he's always around a million people.
Sybil is going to be gone until January. I don't think that's right, but at least there's food in the house this time.
My anxiety has gotten a little bit better, but not much really. At least I'm finally comfortable at school. I still can't handle crowds.
I've really been a fan of the 'The Star Chronicles' fandom basically forever. I have to admit I'm Pisces/Scorpio trash. And the fandom is just so lovely. I have more amazing friends online than in real life. We PM on fanfiction all the time, and have group chats on Drive a lot. They help me get through my days because many of them are also having hard life issues.
Cinder's stepmother is evil, from what she told me, and her sister, Peony, has deadly cancer. Scarlet just lost her parents. PrincessOfTheMoon's life (she never told me her real name) is stressing her out, though she's pretty vague about it. I'm just here dealing with a ton of anxiety.
This year I didn't get any cards or presents. Kai probably sent one, but it hasn't come yet. Makes sense. He's a super huge celebrity. Besides, the only thing I really want for Christmas is a new laptop. And maybe Carswell Thorne.
Hopefully all of our lives will get better soon
Until next year,
~Cress
Deciding to call Kai after all, Cress moved her phone so it leaned against the lamp on her nightstand. Settling into a crisscross position on her bed she pressed the call button and stared at the screen. Kai's face flashed on it with a familiar whoosh of whenever they facetimed.
They'd been best friends for years, yet they hadn't talked in over three weeks. When they were younger, they'd talk every day for at least an hour. Now they didn't speak often. Cress hated it. Just because Kai was famous and all shouldn't mean he should ignore her. They still shared the same strong bond from when they were younger.
"Hello?" Came his familiar voice. Cress smiled at the screen.
"Merry Christmas, Kai," she said with little emotion. If she were being honest with herself, she wasn't as happy as usual. Her 'stepmother' was always abusive and never home. She'd be gone for all of Cress's Winter break. After Kai, her only other real friends were online. They were the only people that really understood her.
"Merry Christmas, Cress! How are things going? We haven't talked in forever!"
Kai was in his five-star hotel room. He was in Hollywood, where he was able to walk on the 'famous red carpet.' High-class decorations hung on the walls, and even a fake fire burned in a fireplace along the back wall. The single strand of lights hung on a lonely wall in her room couldn't even compare to his. She felt pathetic.
"Pretty good. I've been writing a bit recently. I was wondering if you wanted to come over for New Years?" She asked hesitantly. He probably had plans for the new year since November. No one would be coming over and she wouldn't be visiting anyone else. "I can make cookies or something, if you want. I` know you're in the city right now, but.." She trailed off.
He sucked in a breath. Here it comes. Another decline.
"Well, I already did have plans. I will be home by then. You have an open invitation if you want to come here maybe."
"Thanks anyway. I'll definitely consider it. I might have family coming over myself." Which wasn't true. Her anxiety tended to flare around more than three people. "I sent you a present, too."
"Thank you!"
She smiled. At least someone in real life seemed to appreciate her.
"Thank you back," she replied.
"I'm sorry. I know you're uncomfortable in crowds."
Uncomfortable was an understatement.
A high pitched tune rang through Kai's house from the doorbell. Cress tried to hide her disappointed emotions and smiled. " Don't worry about it. I guess that's your family?"
"Yeah. I'll see you later. Merry Christmas again." He hung up before she could say anything back.
Finally, all the emotions of the week, stress, pressure, and the conversation hit her at once. She couldn't help it; she began crying. Seeing everyone else, not just Kai, with other people just made her feel worthless. She had no one.
At least, no people in real life. That's when it occurred to her.
Jumping up, she scurried to the couch, where she had left her beat-up, slow laptop. Picking it up she turned it on and carried it to her bedroom.
She typed in the familiar URL. The website she went onto so much all she had to do was type the first letter: F.
She wrote a message to Revolutionary26, or as few knew her as, Cinder. She was probably busy, but they always talked anyway. They'd known each other for years. In fact, she was the first one she had became friends with. They were so close Cress even knew her little sister, Peony.
Hey, Cinder. Know you're probably horribly busy but I wanted to say hello and Merry Christmas. Having a horrible one this year.
Sure, the message was probably personal, but Cress wasn't worried. Online she had a tight group of friends, including Cinder, that she trusted.
Opening up The Star Chronicles archive, she saw that RedFire79, or Scarlet, had updated one of her favorite fanfictions, a Scisces (Pisces x Scorpio) AU. It'd been updated only for an hour, but she soaked it in. All two thousand words of it.
Checking her PM inbox afterward, Cinder had actually written back.
Oh no? Whyy? That's not fair. Can you come to Hangouts? Hangouts was a private place online where their group could talk with all them together at once instead of just having a one way conversation. I'll try to get a few of the others on there too.
Sure. Thank you :)
Logging into Hangouts, she was surprised to see three of her friends- Cinder, Peony, and Scarlet- were already on.
She wrote to them.
Hey guys. Merry Christmas. It's okay if you're busy and don't want to be here :)
Scarlet wrote first.
Don't worry, Cress. We're here for you. Cinder said you were alone? BTW, thank you for leaving another review.
She wrote back: It was my pleasure. And yeah, I'm all alone and I feel miserable.
I know how it feels to feel miserable. But on Christmas? That's no fair :( *hugs* Peony wrote.
Cress smiled. It was just like Peony to be going through that yet still care about others. She typed a quick thank-you to her.
Soo, any major plans going with you guys? She was honestly curious. They probably had differing traditions big time.
No.. I'm just on campus and no one is bothering me. Scarlet said. Her grandmother's house had no internet, so she had to go to her college campus to get access. It was probably a hard adjustment for her. My grandma might tell me to come home in a bot tho.
Guilt plagued her. They didn't have to be talking to her when they could be enjoying themselves. In a way, it warmed her heart to know that they actually cared about her. Aw guys I feel bad.
Don't, wrote Peony.
Everyone stopped talking for three minutes. Everyone ended up coming back with the same response.
Sorry, grandmother just yelled at me over the phone to come home. We'll talk later okay?
I need to go to take my medicine. Peony wrote. Her 'medicine' was more of a home 'stick a needle in your arm' treatment. I'll be back in two hours, K?
And last but not least, Cinder. Adri's yelling at me to clean up. I promise we'll talk later.
Cya later guys, thanks again!
Putting the slow computer off her lap, she let out a shaky breath and felt her heart speed up. Her breathing became quicker. Now she was really alone.
A small '1' appeared in the corner of her screen, indicating an email. She opened it up.
Ironic enough, it was a PM from PrincessOfTheMoon.
Ryu told me something wasn't right. So, my dear hacker, I just want to tell you that you are a lovely girl, inside and out. Even when you feel alone, we're always there for you even when we're not there exactly. Have a merry Christmas.
How in stars name did she know?
Outside a few flurries began to fall, and the sky darkened. Alone or not, she had friends, best friends that actually cared about her. That's what the PM was saying.
She smiled and looked at the swirling snow now falling heavily. A wave of reassurance passed over her. So maybe this wasn't the best Christmas. So maybe she was was 'technically alone.' The fears from before no longer mattered.
Because she always had someone to turn to.
