CONVERSATIONS


She sat by the bonfire, arms around her knees, eying the woods impatiently though she wasn't entirely sure why when Merle walked over and flopped down on the ground beside her, looked in the direction she was watching and proceeded to shake his head and howl with laughter.

"What?" Lana asked, giving Merle a sharp look. She was still on edge from an earlier confrontation with Shane and yet another attempt at her sister giving a half assed apology. She was pretty much done with the day so far and glad it was night time. But anxious.

She hadn't seen him all day, not even for a split second. There had been no vague jabs taken at her like he seemed to enjoy doing when he stubbornly insisted on calling her princess or barbie or some other nickname she suspected that he gave her because he had entirely the wrong impression about her.

Merle eyed the brunette and shook his head as his laughter ceased gradually and took a sip from a flask as he said "Nothin, sugar tits."

"If it's nothin then you won't mind tellin me what the hell is so funny?"

"Just know what yer sittin there thinkin right now, is all. Ya won't ever admit it. Girls like you never do, I don't reckon."

"Girls like me..."

"Classy stuck up ones."

Lana burst into laughter then and then asked quietly, "And just where do you get that impression?"

"You and yer sister, sugar tits. Yer like night and day."

"Thank God for that. Least I'm not screwin her husband."

"One way o' lookin at it, I reckon." Merle shrugged as he added casually, "He'll be in from the woods in a few minutes, sugar tits."

"Who?"

"The man yer about to damn near break yer neck watchin fer. My little brother. Which is what I came over to talk to ya about… Daryl ain't…. He ain't like me." Merle stared into the fire as he twisted the empty glass bottle in his hands.

"That's kinda obvious, I'd think."

"Hey! I could take offense to that."

"He has manners."

Merle snorted in laughter again, shook his head and waved his hand as he laughed. Then he stopped and said calmly, "If yer just messin with him cause yer bored… It won't last."

"I'm actually not messing with anybody." Lana stated as she air quoted the term messing with and then said quietly, "Besides, you're wrong about me, completely. But you're right about one thing… It won't last."

Merle noted the shift in her tone when she said it, how it almost sounded wistful and he covertly smirked to himself. She wasn't as bad as some of the other women in this damned group, at least she did laugh at the way he did things and the stuff he said, she didn't go getting uptight like nearly every other one.

Curious, and enjoying casual conversation for once, while also trying to find what the hell his kid brother saw in this one girl, he asked Lana, "Why wouldn't it last? I mean yer opinion."

"Because… guys like that only look for the easy marks. And this easy mark's all played out."

Merle snickered and shook his head. Again, she had entirely the wrong assumption. So he stated in response to it, "Yeah, well, yer kinda girl only goes messin around with guys like my brother n me if they're bored."

"You really think so, huh?" Lana asked, brow raised as she wondered where in the hell both the Dixon men seemed to get the assumption she was some high society woman or something. It made her start to laugh and she was laughing so hard that soon she was shaking.

"What's so damn funny?"

"Most people, Merle, would be real offended if you said some shit like that to them. I, however, think it's hilarious and don't mind setting you straight.. I mean since we're having this conversation." Lana took a sip of water and winced a little, she had a slight abdominal pain that for a few seconds made her heart race a little in fear.

Merle noticed it and stood, pulled her up. "C'mon… Reckon we can see if anybody here knows anythin about babies and bein pregnant. Because that look just now..."

"I'm fine, okay? I just… Every now and then today it's happened. Goes away when I calm myself down and just sit real still. I was taking courses to become a nurse, interned at a hospital. Lots of women get them now and then, especially if they're too active and conditions aren't exactly optimal to be pregnant in the first place. Also not too early for it to have been a kick..." Lana rubbed her abdomen gingerly… Maybe if she kept thinking positively, maybe… She couldn't let herself freak out, not now, damn it. She could do this. She was going to do everything in her power to make sure she took care of herself and the baby. It had only been happening sporadically throughout the day, if it kept up tomorrow, she'd tell someone heading out on the supply run what to pick up for her.

But she refused to think anything negative. She was going to be fine, the baby was going to be fine, she was not going to lose a child she very much wanted. She wasn't sure if she could actually handle it, but she didn't dare admitting it. "I'm fine. If it keeps up I'll get somebody to pick things up for me on the supply run tomorrow."

Merle eyed her warily, almost as if she were a ticking time bomb and not a pregnant woman. "Yer sure? Because Daryl, he told me to look over ya while he was gone huntin." as he eyed her and searched her face for a reaction, smirking a little when he got the desired reaction, he'd been casually testing the waters. After a few seconds, he added with a shrug, "Tell me what ya need and I reckon I could try and find it.

Lana grumbled and raised a brow, a confused look on her face as she asked quietly, "He did? I mean but why the hell?" as she eyed Merle and waited, nodding when he mentioned helping her and thanking him for it, her mind going a mile a minute at this new information revealed.

Merle nodded in the direction of Shane and Lori.

"Oh.." Lana went quiet and then picked up where she'd been about to start a few minutes before the flutter of pain. "I think you both got the complete wrong idea about me. For starters…. That car? Something I've been working my ass off for and saving my money to buy since probably, oh, my freshman year in high school… My sister and I, we didn't have that much when we were growing up. And I just got so sick of wearing Lori's hand me downs and never having anything of my own."

Merle eyed her, curious now. He nodded so she'd continue.

" I worked my ass off, made damn good grades and the second that diploma was in my hand, oh man…. I got the hell away from King County. Thought I'd go off to a big city somewhere, make something of myself."

"Reckon it went well, you got all this fancy shit."

Lana laughed and shook her head slowly. "I did, but I didn't… Because you see that man right over there? The one thing I really wanted… I use past tense here because since this whole end of the world shit started, I've sort of started to step back and take a look at things..." Lana's voice fell away and for some strange reason, the passing thought came to her ' I really hope that stubborn son of a bitch gets back to camp soon. He's never been gone on a hunt this long, has he? Does he not know it's dangerous?' but she kept it to herself. Probably the best thing to do. She continued where she left off be f ore getting distracted after taking a heavy sigh and answering honestly, "Shit like this… It always knocks the people we idolize and love the most right off any pedestal we got 'em on… I thought Shane was going to change this time… Should have known better. Never should have come back here, for him."

Merle thought to himself, 'If it didn't work the first time, girl, why the hell would ya keep tryin?' but his curiousity was satisfied when she continued to speak a few seconds later, telling him that she'd always had this crush on the older guy, Shane… And the older she got, the worse it got… Problem was, Lori was always around… And then when Lori got married, Shane suddenly noticed her.

It made sense to Merle then, but not willing to risk his life and piss off a hormonal pregnant woman, he kept his thoughts on the matter hidden.

Shane walked over and eyed Merle, asked Lana in concern, "You alright, baby?"

"I'm not your baby."

"Hon..."

"Get lost, pig boy." Merle stood, toe to toe with Shane, eying him, doing exactly what his brother asked him to do.

Shane glared at him and started to shove the guy but Lana spoke up and said calmly, " What part of don't fucking stress the pregnant woman do you not get, Shane? Look, it's over, it's done. You can be a part of our kid's life but you're not a part of mine anymore. And if you want me to have a healthy and easy pregnancy, Shane, god damn it, stop breathing down my neck and trying to make me forgive you because it will not happen. Ever. This was the last time you took my heart and broke it. I think I got the best part of you anyway."

Shane sighed and started to say something but Lana's cool tone and the pain in her eyes stopped him. He walked away to cool off, he'd give her time to cool off too. They had to fix this. He was not going to just stand back and let her go without a fight, especially not to one of the damned Dixons.

Daryl chose that moment to walk out of the woods, crossbow slung over his shoulder, cigarette dangling from his lips. Shane was walking past, Daryl said casually, " Might be a good idea ta leave 'er alone." and kept walking.

Shane turned but Lori grabbed him quickly and then said quietly, "Shane, you have to let her go, okay? You know how this always goes. And she's my little sister even if she hates me right now. Maybe it's for the best."

Shane yanked his arm away and glared at her before walking away.

Daryl walked over to Merle and Lana and Merle made it a point to say in a very loud and teasing tone, "See, sugar tits? Back and in one piece… And lookit, he's got supper too."

"Merle?"

"Yeah, Daryl?"

"Stop talkin and start skinnin, god damn."

Merle grumbled and took that as his cue to make a retreat. One look at Lana's visibly flustered and flushed cheeks told him he'd gotten the desired rise out of her anyway, his work for the time was done.

Daryl eyed Lana wondering why Merle said what he did when he'd walked over just now after getting back from the hunt.

"Took you long enough, Dixon."

"Bastard I was carryin in over m' shoulder decided it wanted ta run all over. Found it down by that crick we all been usin to wash up in."

"Pretty good sized deer."

"Ain't the biggest 'ne." Daryl shrugged as he eyed Lana and then asked, "Shouldn't ya be sleepin or somethin, shit..."

"I was heading that way."

The tension between them was so thick anybody could see it and after the sarcastic exchange, Lana made a hasty retreat to her tent.

Laying there, she went back over the entire conversation with Merle in her mind, though she wasn't really even sure what she hoped to gain by doing so in all honesty.

"If I don't stop overthinking this, seeing things that are definitely not there..." she warned herself as she yawned and rolled over, tried to get some sleep.

It was harder to do now, she didn't have anyone holding her on the few nights she actually let herself feel the loneliness. The thought made her laugh because if she really stopped to think about it, when had she ever 'had' Shane Walsh all to herself?

He might have been with her but his mind and his heart were always somewhere else.


CAVEAT LECTOR:

Wow! I wasn't expecting many to review this, to be honest. I really don't view myself as the greatest writer and I figured that I was get ting all the characters totally wrong. I can't believe I have 6 reviews! And then 4 favorites and 5 follows. Thank you all so much for the love and the encouragement to actually continue this story. Azraelthegunslinger, your review really touched me because like I said, I was so worried I was going to fuck up even attempting to write Daryl. I'm glad you like the portrayal, very glad. galwitanatitud, I may or may not have made a decision as to who I'm going with. ;p

Thanks so much, everyone! God I love you guys!