Chapter 189: Clearing the Air
"That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way." – Doris Lessing
"Everything that I understand, I understand only because I love." – Leo Tolstoy
"The greatest happiness of life it the conviction that we are loved – loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." – Victor Hugo
"Today is the blocks with which we build." -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Sydney smiled at him and looked to Francie, where Will's eyes traveled as well.
Francie regarded everyone, "Why does everyone keep looking at me?" She looked at Will, "How did you find out?"
Will answered, "Mike told me…and we're looking at you because…well…"
"Because she wants to protect Sydney," Vaughn answered.
Will looked at him, "I want to protect her too…'
"Yeah, but you heard it from me…you'd probably be in the same boat if you heard it from Sydney. You're first reaction would be to kick my ass."
Will smiled, "Well…"
Vaughn looked at Francie, "I hate what I did…and I'll probably never forgive myself, no matter what anyone tells me…I'm sorry…"
"You don't have to apologize to me," Francie said.
"Well, I feel like I should for some reason."
"Why?"
"Because, it's obviously affected everyone – it's not like this is just about me or Sydney…if I'm here, it's going to affect you guys too. You let me stay here…you're Sydney's friend…" he shrugged, "I just wanted to apologize."
"I don't want to see Sydney get hurt," Francie said.
"I don't want to see her hurt either, and I don't want to hurt her…I would never hurt her intentionally."
"Vaughn, I know that," Sydney said looking over at him.
"But maybe Francie doesn't," he said looking from Sydney back to Francie.
"No, I do…I just…I'm not sure it matters that it was unintentional."
"Francie…" Sydney said with distain.
"I'm just saying what I think…and I have every right to as your friend, because I care about you."
There was silence again until Vaughn said quietly, "I already asked Sydney, but this is your house too…if you want me to leave, I will."
"Vaughn, it's not up to Francie," Sydney said.
Vaughn looked over at her, "If she wants me to leave, I will."
All eyes fell on Francie again, "Can you guarantee it won't happen again?"
"No, but I can guarantee I'd kill myself before I hurt her again."
Francie started him down, searching his eyes. She nodded, "Good enough for me."
Will let out the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding in.
"So, what movie are we gonna watch?" Francie asked.
Will stammered, "Uh…I don't…why don't I go see what we have."
"I'll come with you," Francie said, getting up. She smiled at Vaughn and Sydney and followed Will out.
Sydney looked over at Vaughn, "What if she would have said yes."
"Then I would have left," Vaughn said simply.
"Even though I didn't want you to."
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because she cares about you. And it's her house too…"
"But you're mine…and she has no say over what we decide."
"Well…I would have…"
Sydney laid her head on his shoulder, "Why is it then that you can't forgive yourself when you've just demonstrated once again what a wonderful man you are?"
Vaughn chuckled, "Because I love you too much."
"But I already forgave you."
"But I'll never forgive myself."
"Vaughn."
"I didn't say I'd never accept it…just…not fully yet. That's all I've got right now ok? I can't tell you that I'm over what I did."
"I understand…I just don't want it to drag you down…"
He sighed, "Just keep doing what you're doing then."
"I will."
He turned to look at her and kissed her forehead, "Thank you."
"Thank you." She said as she turned her head to kiss him on the lips, "That was very brave…"
"Nah…"
"Yeah, it was."
"Well, I was scared shitless."
Sydney chuckled, "You still did it."
"Yeah."
"I love you even more for it."
"That means a lot…I love you more every day."
"Ditto."
Will looked sideways, nervously at Francie.
"Will if you have something to say, say it," she said.
"What were you doing in there? It wasn't his fault…"
"No, but he did it…"
"Would you have said yes?"
"If I didn't believe him…but it took a lot of guts for him to ask in the first place."
"Sydney would have been really mad."
"Well, she would have seen in time that I did it because I care about her."
"By sending the one person she loves the most away?"
"Yes."
"Jesus. That was really…awkward…"
"Yeah, now it's not. Really, I like Michael and he handled that really well. He initiated the conversation and he did a good job answering me. Given that, I still had to ask, but I would never say yes…not really…because I think that would do more damage to him… and Syd…ok?"
"I'm glad you said that, because you were starting to scare me."
Francie smiled, "What movie…"
"Uh…I have no idea…I think drama is out…" he said with a smile.
Francie smacked his arm.
"And horror…"
She smacked him again, then turned him and kissed him softly, "You're a good man too…"
Will smiled, "Thanks."
"How about…romantic comedy?"
"Ugh…"
"You can stand one…"
"Ok," Will said with a sigh, "Which one…you pick the chick flick."
"Heartbreakers? Blast From the Past?" Francie chuckled, "I've seen like all of these…so…"
"Well – what…um…actresses are in them?"
Francie turned, "What?!"
"Well, I mean – I have to have something to…" he stopped, "whichever you pick is fine…"
Francie smiled, "Knew I liked you…let's do Heartbreakers."
"K…that's an excellent choice honey," Will said with a smile.
"You're not a bad liar…"
They walked back to the bedroom, smiling and holding hands.
"K – well – I let Francie pick the movie – and she picked an all-out-action film! Just kidding! We get a CHICK FLICK! YAY!"
Vaughn laughed, "Which one?"
"Heartbreakers…I tried to ask about that actresses…but well I got the evil eye…"
Vaughn smirked, "Never ask about the actresses, just look at the box dude."
Sydney smacked his arm.
"Ow!"
She and Francie smiled triumphantly at each other. Francie beamed, "Movie's starting!"
She snuggled up with Will on the floor by the bottom of the bed and Sydney did the same with Vaughn on the bed. When both women looked at their respective boyfriends fifteen minutes later, they were both asleep.
Francie looked back at a smiling Sydney. She shook her head and they giggled quietly through the film. When it was over, Francie tapped Will.
He jerked awake, "What? What I miss…"
Francie snorted, "The movie, come on."
"I missed the whole thing?" he asked in a whiney voice, "Oh man…and I was really looking forward to it…damn!"
Francie just shook her head, "Night Syd."
"Night Syd," Will echoed.
Sydney got Vaughn resettled on the bed and turned off the lights, snuggled back in and joined him in slumber, hoping he'd be free of nightmares.
