"The Chronicles of Narnia"

It was so good to be home. As she stepped through the castle's gate, ran through the halls and finally got to her private chamber, finally the exorstion took over her. It was wonderful to refresh herself and to eat dinner in peace. The castle seemed remarkably quiet. Susan and Edmund were in Archenland, so the only company she had there were the guards - fauns and centaurs, and the tree faeries in the garden. They all welcomed her with joy, happy that at least one of the four Kings and Queens was back.

In the evening, Lucy, wrapped in her most comfortable night robe and the warm, white blanket, stood on the castle's highest terrace and for a long time she watched the amazing sunset over the Eastern Sea. It was so peaceful and full of warm colors that her past few days seemed to be like a strange dream. Her eyes often dwelled on the Northern Mountains though and again, a new feeling of longing and axiety caused her heart to beat a little bit faster. There were so many mysteries to be solved, she thought.

The next day, shortly after breakfast, Lucy went to Cair Paravel's library. After the war, when the things calmed down, many of the books and the old manuscripts previously kept hidden from the White Witch, were brought to them. Some were also found in the castle itself, sealed in the dungeons and damaged, but they were still readable. Part of them she already knew. The Chronicles of Narnia. The Prophecy about her, Peter, Edmund and Susan. Hundreds of archives and documents related to Queen Jadis' laws and rules. Prison sentences. Stoning sentences. With trembling hands she opened one of them, although a part of her didn't want to know what exactly Jadis was doing with those, who opposed her. Seeing that there were no tales of tortures, Lucy sighed with relief, but it gave her only a little comfort as apparently Jadis always turned everyone into a stone.

It was almost evening when she felt she couldn't sit there any longer. In a way it was much more exhausting than climbing the mountains. She took some of the parchments upstairs, ordered a dinner to her room and ate it alone, reading intensely. "Her Majesty Queen Jadis of Narnia sentenced, here was the name, to stoning for plotting against the safety of Narnia and The Queen." "Her Majesty Queen Jadis of Narnia banned, there was a name, for disloyalty." "Her Majesty Queen Jadis..." And so on. All these kinds of documents were very alike and each of them was signed by Jadis herself and the chief of her secret police. Lucy stared at the big, ornamented "J" and had it still before her eyes when she went to sleep.

If Lucy hoped to find any proof that Jadis was not always as evil as it was said, she didn't find it. It seemed like in those times Narnia was indeed safe from an outside invasion, but kept under a strict control and most of its inhabitants felt terrored. The young queen stared at the ceiling, feeling confused and disappointed. And lonely. Very lonely. Which was another, strange and unknown experience.

"Only those who don't hate me can enter this land. That is the spell."

Lucy was turning in her sleep. The familiar voice in her head kept on asking questions she couldn't understand, but she had a question herself.

"What do you want from me?"

"I don't. You do."

Lucy woke up. She noticed her duvet was lying on the floor and she was covered in sweat. It was often hot in Narnia but never that much and definitely not in the early morning. She shivered.

But the delicious breakfast on the sunny garden terrace and smiling faces of the cheerful tree fearies brightened up her mood. She listened how they hummed beautiful tunes, ruffling among the flowers and laughed as they made the leaves whirl around her head. Soon, she couldn't resist anymore and took off her shoes to run through the grass, following them.

"Have you heard, have you heard? The Oak saw them kissing! Rose-Nayad with Lily! I know what I saw!"

Lucy laughed as they quarreled, wondering if the couple they were referring to really got together after some fight they had witnessed before.

"All is forgiven! Love forgives everything!"

They giggled. Lucy looked at them curiously.

"Do you think, all can be forgiven?"

Fearies silenced and gazed at her, musing.

"It depends," said one.

"If there is regret, there can be forgiveness" said the other.

"But what if a person did wrong for a very long time? Can such a person change?" Lucy asked again.

"Everybody can change." Faeries answered.

Back in the library, Lucy put aside all the documents about Jadis' times of ruling. She focused on the older ones. As old as possible, so this time her task was much more difficult. She dug through the piles of dust, seeking the most damaged ones, the oldest pieces of the archive, hoping she would find the answers how really Jadis came to Narnia. And about the Great Magic. The one Jadis and Aslan quoted as they settled the fate of Edmund. It was the first time she saw her. Little Lucy, standing near the great Lion, feeling like in a weird dream.

"Why it felt like a dream?" Appeared in her thoughts. She reminded Jadis approaching, her golden hair shone in the sun like Aslan's mane. She was beautiful and frightening, as anger flickered in her eyes like little blisters.

"Aslan let her kill him. Aslan sacrificed himself for Edmund. But he rose again. And he killed her. And now she rose again. Does she want to kill him? Is another was upon us?" As she thought about it, tears filled her eyes. It was all so horrible.

"Something bothers you." Said Mr Tumnus the next day. He watched her with concern as she drank her tea, ate a dilicious pie, as always. But she was also unusually quiet and restless.

Lucy smiled to him. She was in fact prepared for this question. Who could she better share her worries with than her best friend? Yet, she never had a secret before. Now it hanged in the air, like a wall between them and she knew she must find the way to go around it to not destroy this friendship.

"I have so many thoughts and questions lately. There are uncovered mysteries in Narnia that keep hiding from me. And shouldn't I know everything, as the queen?" She asked. It was true. She didn't find what she was looking for in the library and it didn't let her rest.

Mr Tumnus looked directly in her eyes and the first time she felt like turning away. He seemed like seeing through her and it frightened her that he could see the memory of the ice land, like the foxes did. But he only took her gently by the hand.

"What mysteries do you mean?"

"For instance, the history. The very ancient history of Narnia. From before the Winter Times." She avoided to speak of Jadis openly, aware that the tone of her voice would drag Mr Tumnus' attention. He let go of her hand and prepared more tea.

"Nobody really remembers it. And the chronicles were destroyed." He spoke.

"Destroyed? Why?" She was so curious she forgot to be careful.

"Nobody wanted to remember how she came to this land, I suppose. That's what I was told." He glanced at his father's portrait and his fists clenched. Lucy understood very well who he meant by "she" and shivered as the faun's voice instantly changed. It made her feel even worse.

"She wanted me to kidnap you! I almost... Oh, never mind. Forgive me, please. Just, as I remember those days... Thanks to Aslan they are over."

"But I can't stop thinking, how it all started?" She hoped her voice was as calm as she wanted to.

"Is that what bothers you? The White Witch?" Mr Tumnus stood up and closed to her, staring disturbingly at her face. Lucy felt her cheeks turning red and her heart bumping. 'He knows...' she felt increasing panic.

"You have dreams about her, is that it?"

She couldn't deny it.

"I..."

"Oh my queen! You should have said so at once! I knew something troubled you for weeks already!" Mr Tumnus clearly relaxed and she felt she could breathe again. "Your brother has nightmares, too. Though he wouldn't admit it before any of you. But I know. Once I even gave him one of my sleeping potions. The one that..." He looked down and stuttered. "But it really helps, if you don't take more than a few drops!" He took one of little bottles standing on the shelf where he also kept the tea. Finally she managed to smile. The visible relief on her face reassured Mr Tumnus that was the reason she was so uneasy lately and he was even happier that he could help. So the took the potion with the words of gratitude and left his home.