"The Great Magic"

Lucy woke up and the first thing she saw, was almost blinding light and the white walls around. She was also very comfortable and warm. The wonderful feeling increased when she realized that the smell, which made her instantly thirsty and hungry was coming from the steaming pot of tea and the plate of pastries put on the night table by the bed. At first, she felt like home. The feeling of relief and safety made her body relax and she almost started to fall asleep again. Then she realized. Quickly, she stood up and ingnoring the sourness she felt in her bones, she looked around. The room didn't change much from the first visit. The landscape with the snowy field was now covered in orange and violet light of the setting sun. Lucy reminded what happened, but couldn't recall how she got to the Santuary this time. Everything in her mind was blurry. She opened the door and carefully stepped out. Down the stairs she found her own coat and her bag. The opened scrolls were lying on the table. She stepped closer.

"Don't touch them!" Jadis rushed in and quickly took them away. "Don't you have enough?" She forced her to seat on the chair nearby and before Lucy managed to speak a word, the queen put one hand on her forehead and covered her right cheek with the other. Lucy gasped. She couldn't move, just stared at Jadis' eyes, as she gazed back at her intensely and looked relieved.

"You are amazingly alright, considering what you have done. It's incredible..." She let go of her.

"What have I done?!" Lucy couldn't stand it anymore. "And what I am doing here?"

Jadis smiled. If Lucy thought at first the queen was angry, now she noticed she wasn't. Jadis really seemed relieved.

"You are the first mortal being that could come through my old spell. What's more, you are also the first one who experienced the spell in this way."

Lucy looked at her astonished, feeling confused, but the more awake she was now, the more curiosity was overtaking her. Her mind got clear and she reminded something.

"You told me to look for them! You told me! In my dream!"

The icy blue eyes met her own, darker blue and Lucy again thrilled. Why Jadis had such an effect on her?

"Neither I know, why we seem to visit eachother in dreams, dear. But I would never think the scroll would pull you into my own mind. It should be impossible for someone like you..."

"But it did. And I saw how Narnia was created! I saw... everything!" Lucy stattered as she almost said about Aslan. Jadis frowned.

"I know."

Lucy looked down. Now she understood. She understood not only what she saw, but also what she felt. She knew she had experienced the birth of Narnia through Jadis' eyes, through Jadis' mind. She knew, how the queen felt at that moment. She even could recall some of her memories. And that was the part she desperately wanted to forget. The dizziness started to come back to her.

"You need rest." Jadis helped her to sit on a more comfortable, soft armchair and the food from upstairs reappeared on the table.

After breakfast Lucy felt better and her thoughts cleared up. This time the queen didn't leave her alone. She waited in silence until Lucy finished her tea and ate one of the pastries, although she didn't really feel like eating at all. Finally, Jadis sighed and sat closer, staring at the girl with a strange expression. Lucy didn't know if it was irritation, or apprehension.

"I really was going to let you read them, you know? Your curiosity impressed me. You have a hunger for knowledge and you cannot be satisfied with the stories you were told. In a way, you are like me a long time ago." She smiled. Lucy, who was now strenghtened by the food and feeling more confident thanks to Jadis' gentleness, calmed down and smiled back.

"You helped me to find them, didn't you? I called your name and..."

"Well, that wasn't me. I couldn't leave this realm even if I wanted to. But a long time ago I secured the scrolls so nobody inaproppriate would put the hands on them." Jadis said with a hint of pride. Lucy noticed that the queen liked to brag about her powers a little bit and she felt it was sort of funny. It was almost like Susan telling everyone who would listen that nobody would win with her in the archery tournament. "Anyway," the queen continued. "Only the one who would really want to learn about me, but not to harm me in any way, could break the spell. Now you know." She smiled to her again.

"You must have been very lonely in those days."

As soon as she said that Lucy realised it was inaproppriate. Jadis face got colder. Even if she was right, it was strange to talk in this way to someone, who was destroying entire worlds. But then the corners of Jadis' lips moved slightly up as if she wanted to smile, or to say something ironic, as often. But when she did, her voice was only calm.

"You should stay here till morning."

Lucy was more than happy to hear that. Now when she wasn't afraid of her anymore, she welcomed the chance to spend more time in the winter land. Jadis noticed the change on her face and couldn't refrain a smirk.

"You sure are a curious little queen."

They went to the terrace outside and Jadis wrapped her in a warm coat. As the thick wool closed around her, Lucy grinned. "It's so wonderfully soft! And oh! How lovely!" A white bunny jumped on her laps and tried to hide under the fabric. The other one tried to do the same with the cape of Jadis.

"They can be actually very annoying. Always get under the blanket at night." The queen said, carresing the fluffy head. The bunny didn't seem to be worried by her words as it closed his eyes and started to fall asleep. Lucy refrained a giggle as she very well remembered where she saw them for the first time. Strangely, that memory made her blush. Jadis was looking at her with curiosity mixed with amusement and that made her face burn even more.

"You didn't tell me how I got here this time." Lucy asked to break the silence.

"After our little conversation in the dream, I thought I should send someone to check on you." The queen admitted. "And to my astonishment, Sylvester found you in my castle, with my scrolls, in shock and barely conscious. Bringing you here was the only option." As she spoke, Lucy once more reminded her vision. And then another one came. Lucy saw a red, dark light over an unknown, ruined city. She shivered.

"Charn", she whispered.

"What did you say?!"

Lucy startled. Jadis streightened up on her chair and the bunny escaped and vanished in the snow. The girl managed to control herself and not look down.

"That was the name of your world, wasn't it? I hear it in my head. I feel like everything burns. Inside of me. It hurts when only I think about it..."

"I told you the scrolls are dangerous." The queen replied gentler. "You have got to my memories. Do you realise how old I am? And how old are you? It is a miracle you haven't got insane."

"How old am I?" Lucy thought and suddenly got scared. She had those uncomfortable feelings before, like something in her life was missing, but so far, she used to forget about it after a few minutes. But now, after the visions from the scroll her mind seemed to be unblocking things that were long hidden and now they came our to the surface and overwhelmed her.

"I don't know! I don't know how old I am! And until now I didn't think about that. Jadis, what is going on? Why I don't know? When is my Birthday? When is Susan's Birthday? And Edmund's, and Peter's? We don't celebrate Birthdays, neither we know how old we are. And... Why I don't remember anything from before the war?" She was shouting now, as this empty place in her mind seemed only bigger, the longer she thought about that. At every thought of her childhood, Lucy's mind felt like covered in a mist. Jadis watched her carefully and finally she touched her forehead and caressed her hair.

"You are under a spell, little queen. But not mine. Not mine." She repeated slower and colder. For a while she looked like the old White Witch again, but her anger wasn't directed at Lucy. She stared blankly at the icy space before them. And then she asked. "Indeed. You, a little girl, who, according to the prophecy, came here from another world. The human world. Who were your parents? What were you doing before?"

"I don't know..." Lucy felt a big lump in her throat and could barely speak. "I feel strange. Sometimes it's like the time has stopped. The years pass by, but inside of me... like I am stretched in time and remain a little girl. Yet, I am an adult woman. I am the queen of Narnia now. It's all like heaven. Yet, sometimes it feels like a dream. I feel unreal! I don't understand it. Why don't I remember?"

Jadis cupped her cheek. This touch was so comforting that she stopped shaking. She felt the intense gaze of the blue eyes studying her own.

"My little queen. You don't belong here." Jadis said slowly and clearly. Suddenly Lucy became strangely aware of her every breath, every heart beat. The seconds passed like a clock ticking and she couldn't move.

"What do you mean?" Her throat was completely dry.

"This is not your time. This is not your world." Each word of Jadis stung her like a dagger. "This. Or Narnia. You don't belong here."

"Stop that... that hurts! Stop that!" Lucy struggled and ripped her coat off. The white bunny, sleeping on her laps, jumped out in panic and disappeared. She escaped from the terrace and ran through the snow.

Jadis didn't move. She just sat there, watching the slim silhouette vanishing behind the ice caves and said to herself.

"The big lion gives and takes. Let his name be cursed."