And yet again, Camping Trip is back, and I don't even know what I'm on, so there's no point asking!

Okay, all the reviews I got were from my insane friends, so I'll leave it at that.

Chapter 5: Karma is Fun (for me, not Chazz)

Zane was miserable. Again.

Atticus was incessantly asking for cookies, and Chazz was screaming for two specific reasons. The first was that he was still VERY pissed about the "Boomerang Squirrel" incident. Shockingly, Zane was getting no enjoyment from Chazz's pain. The second reason for Chazz's incessant screeching was that he was, yet again, on fire.

Yet again, I was shocked that Zane did not seem to enjoy the youngest Princeton's pain.

"Zane…" I started cautiously. "What's wrong?"

"Do I really need to answer that question?" he asked, sounding irritated. "No, nothing's wrong."

"Zane, Chazz is in pain and you are not enjoying that pain. What is wrong?"

"Hn."

"You always enjoy Chazz in pain."

"Would you let it die?" he demanded.

"NO! I WILL NOT LET IT DIE! IF YOU DO NOT THINK CHAZZ'S PAIN IS AT LEAST MILDLY FUNNY, THERE IS SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH YOU!" I yelled.

"There's nothing wrong but the fact that everyone here besides you and me is a complete raving lunatic!"

"What about Lex?" I asked.

"Okay, fine, her too," Zane admitted.

At that moment, Alexis started screaming loudly, pointing at a tree that seemed perfectly normal to my vision. Zane left a visible dent on the tree in front of him with his head.

"Zane, stop it! Jeez, what's your problem this week?"

"I am surrounded by lunatics! I thought we covered that!" he yelled. Chazz ran by, screaming insanely and with the squirrel perched on his head, chattering happily. Somehow, I had a feeling that it had something to do with the fire extinguisher held by a charred Syrus, Chazz was no longer flaming.

"Big bro?" the midget asked.

"WHAT?" Zane snapped.

"Eep! Sorry!" Sy squeaked. "I just wondered if you knew why—"

"I don't know why anything here is happening, okay? It's all crazy and most of it defies the laws of nature! Like I really care, but it's also noisy and incessant. That is driving me up the metaphorical wall, got it!?"

"I just wanted to know why you were trying to kill either the tree or yourself," the younger brother said.

"Refer to the previous!" yelled the elder. "Why are you holding a fire extinguisher and currently looking like you were recently on fire? Okay, the second question sort of answered the first, but where did you get that thing in the first place?"

"You concussed Chazz with it in chapter 2, remember?" Syrus squeaked again, intimidated by his brother's bad mood. "It kind of appeared out of thin air!"

"That's it, I'm complaining to the authoress."

"Zane, karma," I warned. "Remember Chazz? He insulted her before the story, and look what a mess he's in. The woman's brutal. Course, she is kinda me, but not exactly…I don't know, I don't get how the whole thing works, just that karma definitely plays into it when you insult the authoress."

"KASDHFLSKJDHFALSDJKFFAEUFHCNXV!!!!!!!!!" Chazz screamed.

"What the heck was that?" Zane asked, looking completely baffled for the first time since his eight-year-old mini-stalker had started with marriage talk.

"I dunno; the authoress still doesn't know," I said. "Wait, this just in, it means 'I'm a crazy monkey-thing with a stick shoved very far up its butt' in some as yet unrecognized alien language. And yes, it is completely unpronounceable, making it entirely impossible to even mention anywhere but a fanfiction. See, Zane? Karma."

"Okay, nix the complaining," he reassessed. "Bad idea."

"Yes, Zane, bad idea."

"CHAZZ!" Daphne screamed suddenly, tackling aforementioned monkey-thing-with-a-stick-shoved-very-far-up-its-butt. "THERE'S A SKUNK EATING YOUR SOCKS!!!"

"DAMMIT!!! I HATE YOU, KAISERESS!" he yelled. A Volvo station wagon promptly fell on his head. "Owie," he whimpered from under the car. "Okay, I'll be good, let me out please…" The Volvo inexplicably vanished and Chazz got up stiffly.

"THE SKUNK IS STILL EATING YOUR SOCKS!" Daphne screeched again.

"JUST DON'T DROP ANOTHER CAR ON ME! GOT THAT, KAI? NO MORE FREAKIN CARS!!!"

NO ONE BUT ZANE IS ALLOWED TO CALL ME KAI, CHAZZY!

"Oh crap," Chazz whimpered. "When she calls me Chazzy, it's always bad…"

Kaiseress dropped her grandmother's camper-truck-thing on him.

YAY! DROPPING HEAVY OBJECTS ON CHAZZ IS FUNNY! AND NO COMPLAINING, CHAZZ! IT'S NOT A CAR; IT'S A CAMPER!

"Can I help with inflicting pain on Chazz?" Zane muttered.

YES!

"Joy," he said. "May I make a suggestion?"

YES AGAIN!

"I'm in pain," Chazz complained.

"I say take a leaf out of Smith's book and make him without a mouth," Zane said. "He'd shut up, which is more than he'll ever do with one."

GOOD PLAN! Kaiseress took Zane's suggestion. Chazz squealed like a little girl until he was no longer able to speak.

"Thank you," Zane said.

NO PROBLEM! WHO WANTS PIE? I LIKE PIE.

"Here, here," everyone said, even Chazz, as Kaiseress had decided not to punish him any more than he had already been punished.

But she did leave the skunk in his suitcase eating his socks.

End Chapter

Oh, yeah, I'm on something all right. Not sure what, but I'll get back to you if I find out. Oh, and the Smith I was referring to is the Smith from The Matrix. Agent Smith, in other words. See you next time if you review. 5 at least: my policy, you know. It might take a week or so anyway, but maybe longer; I'm lazy, you know…sorry. This might be ending soon anyway; I wanna start other GX trips and stuff. After that, I'll have a few other weird things. Don't expect them up soon, though; this is a series of GX doing strange things. Suggest something if you want. Review or no update and Daphne shall eat you! I shall watch and laugh maniacally.