"I'm so over this." Olivia threw a can of beans on the shelf causing quite the noise and bringing everything and everyone to a halt. She had just been outside with Rosita, Sasha could only assume that conversation didn't go well. Rosita had a way about her. She was nice and she would save your life but she could rub people the wrong way. It was misunderstandings and passion more than a bad attitude. Sasha knew from experience. People often thought the worst of her.
Sasha and Tara threw a glance at each other unsure of what was going on. This outburst was out of character for Olivia. She was calm and a bit passive. Only fear seemed to elicit a change in emotion in her. She and Tara were heading out on a run with Abraham soon and stopped by to ask Olivia if there was anything the community needed.
Francine walked over to Olivia. "What's wrong?"
"After everything we've been through, it's still them," She looked at Sasha and Tara. "And then there's us. The Wolves, the herd, the Saviors. We're still standing but they still don't trust us. It," she stopped and let out a strangled growl. "It really burns my biscuits."
If it weren't such a serious moment Sasha would have laughed at that saying. She never heard that before. Burns my biscuits. She liked it.
"We're all in this together," Sasha assured her.
"Yeah, we're all in it together but there are differences," Olivia said. She cleaned the mess she made, organizing the cans on the shelf. "But we all know there are rings to this circle. We're the outer ring and you're the inner circle." She turned around faced Sasha and Tara as if daring them to disagree.
It didn't go unnoticed to any of them that even their position in the garage was an unintentional example of what Olivia was saying. She and Francine were on one side while Sasha and Tara were on the other side.
"Olivia, we're trying," Sasha spoke gently. "Even before the world was hell on Earth some people had closer bonds than others. We were out there. Out there struggling to survive and had each other's backs in a way I can't explain.
"But you're in here now and we've been through a lot as well." Francine had always been somewhat bitter of their addition to the community.
Sasha had the feeling some of the people in Alexandria who felt they were the strongest and bravest in the eyes of the other citizens resented the group's arrival because it showcased just how much they didn't know. It was as if people like Heath and Francine weren't the biggest and baddest dogs on the block anymore. That seemed to make them a bit insecure.
That was never the intention but when Rick, Abraham, Daryl, and the rest of them took positions of power and leadership it was because they knew what they were doing not because they wanted to be in control. It wasn't a takeover. It was Deanna's decision to put them in their jobs.
"Of course you've been through a lot," Tara spoke up. "But we can't pretend we haven't been through more and know what's out there." Tara was forever the mediator.
Sasha understood they didn't know what this group had seen. "We watched Maggie's dad killed right before our eyes with a sword to the neck by a man who wanted the home we created for ourselves. We watched as Daryl carried Maggie's sister's dead body out of a hospital. We watched my boyfriend tell us how cannibals chopped off his leg and ate it in front of him. Rick and Carl were reunited with Judith after they thought she was dead. She was cared for by my brother, who I thought was dead and who died shortly after I reunited with him. Glenn and Maggie were separated and without a phone or an idea, found each other on nothing but faith and love. Abraham, Tara, Eugene, Rosita, and I helped them find each other. And we're here because we left Georgia to get Noah home to his family in Richmond."
She never shared what they been through. She didn't know what the others had shared and who they shared it with. Aaron probably knew some things because of his connection with Maggie and his recruiting work with Daryl. Maybe Spencer knew some things because of the bond he seemed to have with Michonne. What she just told Olivia and Francine was only a bitter taste of what they had been through. She glanced over at Tara who looked like she was reliving each tragedy as Sasha spoke them. Meanwhile, Olivia almost seemed embarrassed and Francine's attitude seemed to change slightly. She could see it in her body language.
"We're not excluding you guys." Sasha shook her head and pleaded with Olivia.
"You're treating us like the enemy." Francine stood with her arms crossed, unwilling to accept anything Sasha and Tara said even though she was standing over there probably wondering if she could have survived everything she just heard.
"I never saw you that way. I thought you were naive and unprepared, but never the enemy." If they were going to have this conversation it might as well be an honest one. "And I know Rick, Abraham, Michonne, Glenn...they all felt the same too."
"Maybe we weren't out there but we were in here surviving and making things better and creating a system that kept a lot of people alive for a long time. That's nothing to sneeze at and it's time you all respected that." Olivia was angry. She never saw her that way.
"You're right," Sasha said as she nodded her head and looked down. It felt like whatever she said was making them angrier instead of building a bridge, which is what she was trying to do.
"We're not better because of what we've been through. In many ways we're worse," Tara said as she walked over to Francine and Olivia. "And we're fortunate Aaron found us. You helped us when we needed it. We needed to see what life once was and could still be. We were in a bad way. Going down roads that we couldn't have come back from because we thought we had to be what this world was." Tara's voice was soft.
Tara's words gave them all pause. There was a difference between doing what needed to be done in this cruel world and behaving, feeling, and believing they had to be cruel. They could still be good people who would simply have to do some not-so-nice things from time to time to save their lives. They forgot that. She definitely forgot that. Since Bob's death at the hands of Gareth's group all she saw was cruelty and she was determined to fight fire with fire.
"I just feel like we may not know everything but it's not because we're stupid." Olivia walked over and handed Sasha a can of chickpeas. "It's the last can."
"I shouldn't." There may be an abundance of food, but there were still rules.
Olivia shook her head. "I'll deduct if from your next rations."
"Thanks." She loved roasting them with cayenne pepper. Abraham thought they were too spicy. He thought she made everything too spicy.
"If you don't mind me asking, what exactly happened that brought this out?" Tara asked. "If it's something I did or Sasha or anyone, the only way we'll do better is if we know what we're doing to offend you."
Sasha nodded and looked at Olivia and Francine.
"Well," Olivia started as she pushed her glasses up higher on her nose. "I'm not a thrill seeker and I've never been outside these walls, but Rosita telling me I'm not allowed to go to The Hilltop like I'm a child and I have to do what she says really..."
"You biscuits are already burnt." Tara smiled.
Sasha shook her head and smiled as well. Leave it to Tara. At least she's not fist bumping everyone anymore. Sasha believed it to be a type of nervous tick that disappeared once she was comfortable around the group.
"Yeah, burns my biscuits."
"Why do you want to go to The Hilltop?" Sasha asked.
Even without knowing what went on between Rosita and Olivia, she was prone to side with Rosita. Olivia stepped up and killed walkers during the herd invasion, or as Eugene liked to call it, the Great Battle of Alexandria, but outside those walls posed an even greater threat — people.
"Not just The Hilltop. I want to go to all the communities. It can only help to see the different systems. If I can learn something from them to help make what I do better then that's a good thing. I don't need to write a list of questions so Rosita can get the answers. I know best what to ask. Most questions won't come up until I see their system and hear what they say."
Sasha and Tara looked at each other. It was obvious they both thought it made sense.
"Why don't I talk to Rick-"
"No," Olivia shook her head. "I'll talk to Rick."
Sasha caught what she did. At that moment she was no better than Rosita and it was another example of what pissed Olivia off. "Even better idea." She smiled. "We're far from perfect and we have a lot of stuff to work through, some of us more than others, but don't give up on us."
Olivia was smiling. Not Francine, but at least it wasn't a scowl. She liked Abraham and Carol, in due time maybe she'd give the rest of them a chance.
