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The doorbell rang causing Emma to run downstairs, makeup only half applied and her hair still damp from the shower; she pulled opened the large mahogany front door, standing in front of her was a girl in her late teens wearing heavy makeup, fake tan, tight ripped jeans, and a crop top.
"Um...can I help you?" Emma asked
"I'm Ashley, the babysitter" the girl looked over Emma's shoulder, "is Killian here?"
She walked past Emma into the house, "oh, please, come in" Emma muttered sarcastically to herself.
She followed Ashely into the living room, "He'll be home soon...have you looked after a baby before?" Emma was feeling nervous about leaving Kathryn.
"Yeah, sure, I've babysat Liam since he was a baby!"
"I see…" Emma wasn't completely convinced but Killian obviously trusted her.
"Ok, well Killian is going to be here soon and I need to finish getting ready, the boys are upstairs already, reading in bed and Kathryn just needs her bottle and then she'll not be long going to sleep..."
"Are you like his girlfriend?" Ashley interrupted.
Emma blinked twice, surprised by her bluntness. "No, I'm 'like' his nanny" she replied with probably more sass than necessary.
Ashley's questioning continued, "great! Wait...does he have a girlfriend? Is he still dating Ruby?"
Emma shrugged her shoulders. "I've no idea, it's none of my business!" she smiled sweetly then made her way upstairs rolling her eyes once her back was turned. Was this girl for real?
Emma finished curling her hair then threw a brown leather jacket over her navy wrap dress, she didn't know where they were going but it was the kind of dress that could pass as casual or dressy so she wasn't worried. She picked out some knee high brown leather boots and went into Henry's room to give him a kiss, he was already asleep, book in hand lying open; she smiled, picked it up and stuck his bookmark in before closing it and setting it on his bedside table. As she walked downstairs she heard voices, upon entering the living room she saw Killian holding Kathryn who was squeezing his nose, he and Ashley were laughing then looked up to see Emma, "your daughter has some grip!"
Emma laughed, "She sure does! Here let me help you" she peeled the baby's fingers off his nose one by one until he was free and then kissed her daughter on the forehead and hesitantly handed her to Ashley.
"You sure you can manage her?" She asked, feeling sceptical.
"Yeah, for sure! Bottle then bed, easy!" Ashely replied, still greedily eyeing Killian.
Emma sighed, "ok, well I've left my number on the fridge if you need anything please call"
Killian smiled sympathetically at Emma sensing her uneasiness, "I'm sure she will, right Ashley?!"
"Of course!" The teen assured her.
Emma looked at Killian, he was wearing black jeans, a thin charcoal sweater and black leather jacket, and god he looked good! She snapped out of her daydream and elbowed him in the arm, "right Rudolph, let's get going then, I'm starving!"
Killian rubbed his nose where Kathryn had been pulling it, a smile lit up his face, he liked it when Emma felt comfortable enough to tease him, and he walked out behind her calling over his shoulder "thanks Ashley!"
He jogged down the steps to his house rushing ahead of her, unlocked his jeep and opened Emma's door for her, she turned to him still feeling in a teasing mood, and said "so now you're a gentleman?"
He smiled as she climbed in and once she was seated and looking at him he did his best offended look and leaned in to say, "I'm always a gentleman" there was a dark mischievous look in his eyes that sent a delicious shiver right down Emma's spine. He closed her door and walked round to the driver's side.
As they left the driveway he turned to look at her and said "so I was thinking of going to this place I know called 'The Rabbit Hole' they do the best burgers and beers"
"Sounds perfect" Emma said, then also feeling mischievous added, "so your babysitter seems like a sweet girl..."
Amused, Killian played along,
"Oh Ashely? Yeah she's great!"
Emma raised her eyebrow, "she seems to have quite the crush on you!"
He laughed, "She's harmless. Her Dad is one of our crew members, I've known her for years; as for the crush, that's new but it'll pass"
"Mmm hmm? That's what you think" Emma teased.
He chuckled, then looked over at her while she took in the view of the mountains from her window; he couldn't help but wonder if that was the voice of experience speaking…was it possible she was jealous? Was he a horrible person for hoping she was?
The waiter led them to a booth in the back of the restaurant, they slipped into their seats and Killian ordered two locally brewed beers for them, "trust me, you'll love this stuff! I'm somewhat of a connoisseur." he gave her a wink and sly smile.
She giggled then raised an eyebrow, copying his signature look, "Is that so?"
After a look over the menu They each ordered a colossal burger, Emma opted for onion rings instead of fries and while they waited for their food Killian started to tell Emma about his day. He'd been shooting scenes with Ruby all day, and by the sound of it they spent less time filming and more time goofing off!
His stories had Emma in stitches; she wiped a tear of laughter away as the burgers arrived. She took her first bite and it was heaven! She closed her eyes and let out a satisfied moan. Killian raised his eyebrow, "would you like me to leave you and your burger alone for a moment?" He asked suppressing a smile.
"Hey!" She kicked him under the table, "a girl should be allowed to enjoy herself every once in a while without being judged for it!"
Killian raised his hands in defence,
"No judgement here!" That cheeky twinkle returned to his eyes and he added, "if you want to make out with a burger that's fine, it's a free country"
She picked up one of his fries and threw it at him, they both laughed.
He could watch her smile for hours, not just because of how delicious her lips looked but her eyes sparkled brilliantly when she did, she was breathtaking and his chest ached at the sight of her. Her joy was contagious, he was sure he must look like a fool grinning back at her. The evening was going better than he could have imagined and he cursed himself for not doing this sooner.
His voice eventually grew serious, "I'm glad you're having a good time, genuinely!"
Emma smiled at him, "this is the first time I've been out without the kids since I moved here!"
Killian felt a pang of guilt; he really should be making more of an effort.
"We should do this more often", he suggested.
"You're a very busy man." She reminded him.
His face turned thoughtful, "not too busy to make time for my friends" he studied her face nervously.
Emma blushed, she knew they got along well but she worked for him, she never dreamed he'd hold her in such high regard. She realised in that moment that she had begun to truly care for him and that scared her. She made the decision when Neal died to lock up her heart, to save all her love for her children and no one else; that way she couldn't get hurt. She didn't like where her feelings were taking her with Killian, she would need to be careful, there was no way a future was on the cards for them; after all she was his employee and he was...well...Killian Jones! Her walls started to rise up she sat up straight, it was time to take control of the conversation and keep it work appropriate. Her body stiffened and she cleared her throat, "this place is great, do you bring all your nanny's here?" The tone of her voice was blunter than she intended.
Killian scratched his ear, "well you're the only nanny I've hired so technically yes" he raised both eyebrows and smiled hoping to bring back the light-heartedness they shared just moments ago.
Emma was racking her brain for conversation starters, this was so much harder when she wasn't allowed to relax and be herself. She took another bite of her burger to buy time. 'What were they talking about before?' She was backtracking in her mind, 'oh right, Killian's day with Ruby'. "Is it hard to pretend to love someone?"
Killian almost spat out his drink
"What?!"
'Oh shit, that came out wrong' Emma thought to herself.
"I mean..." Emma tried to explain herself, "...when you act. Is it hard to convincingly pretend to love someone, the way your character loves Ruby's"
Killian was unsure how to answer, the question had taken him by surprise, as had Emma's sudden change in demeanour. Did he say or do something wrong? He opened and shut his mouth a few times as he tried to decide the best way to answer.
"It's no different from any other emotions I'd act, be it anger, betrayal, hurt, sadness, surprise etc." He started explaining, "Acting is just playing pretend, I may use my own experiences to draw from but I'm essentially a different person in that moment so the emotions belong to that person, not me." He gathered his thoughts and then continued, "It helps when you work with people you trust, people who are good at their job, it gives you the freedom to really explore your character without worrying about their actions reflecting on people's opinions of you as a person. Does that make sense?"
Emma nodded; she thought for a moment, opened her mouth to ask a question then thought better of it and closed it again.
Killian sighed,
"No, I've never had feelings beyond friendship for Ruby, we've never dated or slept together, or even kissed other than when we were at work on set rehearsing or shooting."
"H...how did you know...?"
"...you were thinking that? Because most people think we have, we know there are rumours of an affair when Milah was alive" his eyes grew dark and his expression grim, "I've never seen Ruby that way, I loved Milah, she was everything..." There was so much pain in his expression, Emma felt awful, "Killian I'm so sorry, I didn't mean while you were married" she reached her hand out and put it on his, he looked up at her, "There is no doubt in my mind you loved Milah, I never believed those rumours, even before I knew you".
She sighed, "I should never have said anything".
He put his free hand on top of hers, holding it between both of his sending her body into high alert, "you didn't, I did. Sorry Emma, I shouldn't have spoken to you like that, it's just a sore subject, I appreciate your faith in me though! Why don't we get out of here, it's a nice night we could walk to the harbour?"
Emma nodded, she could use the fresh air, he released her hand and they made their way outside.
The night had grown cold and Emma pulled her jacket in around her, they walked towards the harbour, the reflection of the moon lay perfect on the still water.
"It's beautiful" Emma sighed.
"That it is" Killian agreed. He wanted to tell her it paled in significance to what she looked like in the moonlight, but that would be a step too far, all night he had been itching to tell her she looked beautiful but it didn't feel appropriate. Then there was whatever just happened in there, something had put her on edge and he wish he knew what. He looked at her standing by the water, taking in the way her hair cascaded down her shoulders, her eyes staring into the distance, her lips relaxed in a small content smile. He ran his tongue along his bottom lip then bit down to try and wake himself out of his daydream.
"Did you speak to your lawyers about the article?" She asked.
"They're looking into it, they feel pretty confident we have a case for slander"
"That's good" she mused then changing the subject,
"Where do you film your scenes on the Jolly?" Emma asked as she looked out at the water.
Killian stood beside her and reached out his arm to show her.
"Way over there, see that pier."
"Is that it? That tiny ship?" She squinted her eyes to try and focus.
Killian cleared his throat, "you know its bad form to insult the size of a man's ship..."
Emma giggled, "sorry, I was just expecting it to be bigger"
He raised one eyebrow.
Emma blushed, "that came out wrong!" She insisted.
"its part of a ships deck built on a barge we use for filming." He shrugged, "as I said, acting is just playing pretend! Besides..." He leaned in and gave her a wink, "it's not the size that counts, it's what you do with it"
Emma rolled her eyes and they both laughed.
"Why don't you come to set tomorrow?" He suggested.
"It's a shorter filming day and a few cast members are bringing their kids along, Henry might like to see the set, I'll be doing a fight scene with Robin, I could show you guys around after?"
"Really? That would be awesome!" Emma said excitedly.
Killian smiled, "great! You guys can all come along with me in the morning. There will be plenty of people there to watch Liam so treat it as a day off; it'd be good for you to make friends here"
They continued walking until they came to a bench looking out on the water and Killian signalled for her to sit. He sat down next to her, the water always calmed him, he looked out on the horizon and asked, "What do you miss most living out here?"
Emma thought for a moment, "I miss my friends and my piano"
That got Killian's attention, "you play piano?"
"Yep, and sing, not so much since the kids came along but I did some touring between nanny jobs that was back when I was Emma Swan"
She shrugged her shoulders, "it seems like a lifetime ago."
"Swan was your maiden name?" He asked.
"Yeah, my close friends just called me 'Swan'"
"Hmmm, 'Swan'...I like it! I didn't know you were musical, we should jam sometime"
"I'd love that!" Emma's eyes lit up again. He stood smiling at her for a moment; he wanted so badly to lean in and kiss her, feel how soft her lips felt. This was torture, he'd be needing another cold shower if he kept this up.
"Well Swan what do you say we head home?"
"Probably a good idea" Emma said, "I'm sure Ashley is anxious to see you", she winked at him.
"Just do me a favour and please don't leave me alone with her!" He groaned and rolled his eyes.
Emma laughed, and then linking her arm in his she pulled him along, "come on Jones! Your adoring public awaits".
