Chapter 5
Disclaimer- I own nothing!
Looking at the options in front of him Alan didn't know what to do. He had never had this much of a hard time picking something out.
"We can always try a different store if you don't like these."
"No, no, these are fine. I just. I never knew there was this big a selection for clothing." Holding a standard tee up and a pair of pants he looked over at William, "both come in five different colors."
William couldn't help but laugh as he moved closer to his fiancée, he was too cute. As promised they went out after work to expand Alan's wardrobe a bit seeing as he complained earlier about his pants being tight.
"Do I really need maternity clothes? I mean I'm not showing yet."
"We could just get you a size up from what you wear now. I just figured this would be easier on you in the long run."
"I guess." Grabbing a few things he went towards the back of the building to try them on having no idea what size he would even need. At least nothing looked old fashioned, everything was standard clothing he was used to wearing now, just stretcher. Looking around with nothing to do William noticed there was a lot to choose from, no wonder Alan was complaining about it
Only waiting a couple of minutes he heard Alan clear his throat as he walked out to the doorway.
"What do you think?"
He was wearing nothing more than black khakis and a striped shirt, but, he looked good.
"I like it. Does the sizing work?"
"I think so, I grabbed the next size up and look." Moving to the side you could tell they weren't about to fall over, though you could see they were a little big on him.
"Well that's good to know. Guess we figured one thing out."
Nodding he went to change quickly back into his other clothes, knowing what he had worked he figured he would just grab more of that just in different colors. While he waited, William grabbed him a pair of sweats and a zip up hoodie for his days off. Alan wasn't big on lounge wear but he noticed while he was sick he loved it. Coming back out he looked over and approved what was grabbed for him and grabbed a few more things before heading out. He really didn't feel like spending a ton of money today. They were planning on buying a house, still needed baby things and he personally missed three weeks of pay. Only one week of it was covered by vacation.
After they left William treated them to dinner knowing neither were really up to cooking, and he wanted to celebrate Alan's first day back at work. Not to mention they hadn't been out to dinner since before their engagement, this was overdue.
"So my doctor's appointment is next week. Twelve weeks next week, how crazy."
"Should I be there for it?"
"Don't you want to be?" Alan looked up at him with hurt in his eyes. He didn't mean it like that, he was simply asking not knowing what sort of appointment it was.
"I do. Honestly I do, and I will be. I just, I don't know, I thought maybe it was one of those that didn't involve me."
"Oh. Well…it's a checkup for me but for the baby as well. We can hear a heartbeat."
Listening to Alan talk while he nibbled on his salad was the cutest thing in the world. It was hard not to be so excited for what was to come as he heard his every word. He wasn't going to lie, if Alan asked he would tell he was scared and excited at the same time. But, watching him, being near him for this experience made him feel better about the impending fatherhood.
Sitting up again Alan looked over at William who was sleeping soundly in their bed. He didn't want to wake him and really he felt fine, minus the nausea. His doctor said he could feel this way up to twenty-two weeks, maybe even the whole pregnancy, he certainly hoped not, he wouldn't be able to handle it. Getting out of bed he made his way to the bathroom and sat at the edge of the tub. Taking deep breathes he tried to make this go away without vomiting. It didn't always work but on occasion he got lucky. The books said the baby was really active right now as they grew, which probably was cause of this sickness. Moving to put his knees on the floor he barely was able to lift the toilet seat before he spilled out his insides. Feeling tears form behind his eyes he cried on his arms as he rested against the rim of the toilet. William didn't know but this was a standard occurrence. He cried every night he woke up sick. He hated being this way, hated being so sick, and this feeling of unable to do anything. He missed feeling like himself. Throwing up again he felt more tears spill from his eyes before he felt gentle hands on his back. When he was able he looked over to see William there, worry for him evident on his face. Knowing he saw him cry he carefully stood and flushed the toilet before rinsing his mouth out and leaving the bathroom.
"Alan…why didn't you say something?" William followed him out of the bathroom and into the living room as he gently sat on the couch and wrapped their spare blanket over him.
"Say what? That I'm miserable this way." He spat out as he brought his legs to his chest. Sitting next to him he put a hand on his knee.
"I wish there was something I could do. You know I hate seeing you this bad. But, we just have to keep reminding ourselves it won't last much longer."
"But it might! William…I don't know if I can handle this the entire pregnancy!" Standing he kept the blanket around him as turned to face him. "These past few weeks have been absolute hell for me! All I do is throw up and feel weak and tired and nauseated. You don't know what it feels like for me but I hate it! And I'm tired but I can't sleep because all I do is throw up and I am so scared of losing this baby my dreams are flooded with it and…."He lost his voice as the hysterics and tears took over. William was on his feet and held him in his arms trying to calm him down. He didn't know this, he didn't know any of this. Alan made everything seem like he was as fine as he could be. Trying to comfort him the best he could they stood there gently swaying as he kept Alan close in his arms. He wasn't sure if this was hormones or Alan but he knew he needed to be a rock for him.
"Ssh ssh, everything is alright Alan." Slowly bringing him to the couch he wrapped the blanket around them and kept Alan's head on his shoulder while he cried. He wished there was more he could do for him but this was all he could think of.
Noticing Alan was starting to calm down he rubbed little circles in his back to help relax him. Soon he realized he had shut his eyes. Carefully lifting him in his arms he brought him back to their bedroom and tucked him before going around the bed to slide in beside him. Holding him close he rubbed gentle circles on his abdomen. He wasn't sure why but something told him it would help him feel better.
In the morning Alan woke up balled up in William's arms. For the first time since he found out he was pregnant he actually slept well. Remembering his meltdown and how comforting William had been towards him he smiled and kissed his nose. He was engaged to the greatest man alive. How he loved him so. As William rolled over a little while later Alan carefully got out of bed and went to make his amazing fiancée breakfast. It had been a while since he had done so and after last night he deserved it. As he got the coffee pot ready he took his medicine not wanting to throw up over the smell of it. He was glad that the medicine did work pretty well, considering where he had been this was much better.
"Morning love." Hearing William come into the kitchen still in his pajamas he smiled over his shoulder while he got the waffle iron hot.
"Morning. I'm making breakfast, as a way to say 'thank you for putting up with me last night." Coming over to kiss Alan's lips he laid a hand on his waist. "You didn't have to do that. I should have figured things out sooner." He did feel guilty for no realizing how Alan was feeling and his not sleeping would explain his higher urge to nap. The books said that early on in pregnancy one was more likely to nap but he would sleep for hours on end instead of maybe forty-five minutes to an hour. Smiling at each other Alan was the first to separate to finish making the batter for the iron. They did have work this morning they couldn't get too side tracked.
