[:Riley:]
It was like a tear in the heart as I said that. Hearing Josh, repeating what destroyed me that made me look like this, it just twisted my instinct. I wasn't ready to trust again. I was way too forgiving. I can't just be like, "Oh Lucas I forgive you now. I love you!" But I know I want to make amends to someone else. I was so focus on Lucas, that maybe I should try and listen and ask why she hates me. Maya. The best friend I had since kindergarten and she betrayed me. I took out my phone and swiped through my list of contacts until I found her name.
"Peaches"
I pressed the call button. It rang a few times until I heard the cackle. I was taken back by surprise. I thought she would ignore my call.
"Hello?" I heard Maya's voice. "Riley, what do you want?" She sounded genuine like she was happy to hear my voice again which confused me.
"Can you meet me at the bay window? I think we need to talk." I asked quietly probably waiting for her answer to say no.
"I'll be there in five."
I waited at the bay window until Maya came in through the window like old time sakes. She settled down and it was awkward. I felt her direction shift to me.
"I'm sorry!" She exclaimed. "For everything. For how I treated you. For pushing you away. For blaming you for my crappy life and getting jealous of your perfect life. At first it was to protect you and then I started to like being without you because I could be myself but my life has been falling apart without you. I miss you." She had tears running down as well I. I smiled, a true smile that I haven't shown in a year.
"I missed you too Peaches." I breathe. "I forgive you." Her smile broadened widely.
"But, I don't think our friendship could ever be the same. I don't think that closeness will ever be the same because of this year time gap. You'll always be my sister and best friend, but I don't think I can go back where you have to protect me and shield me away from the world. Im a senior. I need to grow. But I forgive you."
"Oh Riles." Maya sobbed. She threw her arms around me and I started sobbing too. We just sat there holding onto each other for dear life.
We walked in Topanga's and was faced to face with Missy Bradford.
"Wow, Maya. I've only been gone for a day and your already going back to that loser stage." Missy sneered. Maya tensed up, but I rubbed her shoulders in assurance.
"Leave her alone Missy." I told her. Missy looked at me.
"Oh please. Why would I listen to you? To someone who cuts, starves them self and have parents who are alcoholics." She laughed. I froze. Maya looked at me in horror.
"Oh Maya? She didn't tell you. Cory and Topanga are alcoholics. Auggie is a naughty boy. And Riley here cuts herself, starves herself and tried to kill herself." I was in shock.
"Who told you..." I whispered.
"Oh Lucas did." Missy said innocently. My eyes felt wet and I realized I was crying. Maya rushed me out of Topanga's.
"Riles, how could you not tell me?" Maya asked me.
"I couldn't tell you that because I still didn't trust you. Maya, I'm still healing. I'm still recovering from the pain I had to face for this past year. Losing my parents to alcohol was the most painful thing to have to go through. They are in therapy now. My uncle Josh comes by every week to check on us. Auggie is slowly falling apart. He hasn't fully break because I'm there to keep him together. My grades have been slipping and not having you two in my life was hard. Farkle and Zay were the only one to stay with me, but it never was normal like it used to be. And now, Lucas comes and you come back in my life. I just wanted to live now." I explained to her. She looked at me. It looked like she was having a debate with herself of what she had to say.
"Riley, you won't do it anymore right?" She asked quietly.
"I never said that."
"But Riley-"
"But what? It isn't easy. I'm still hurt. I forgave you but I'm still hurting. Lucas destroyed me. You destroyed me. I have to pick up the pieces. And it isn't gonna be easy." I said.
"But you won't have to do it alone. I'm here forever. And I don't want to lose my best friend again over some guy. Because losing you was the biggest mistake of my life." Maya confessed.
"As long as I know you won't hurt me again. I'll try to lean on you. But, this still doesn't mean we can go back to where we were. Deal?"
"You got a deal."
I'm sorry it's short but I've been on writers block. I'm trying to take some advice and taking it slow. Even though Riley and Maya made up. Riley still doesn't trust her. Their friendship still has some repairs to make but Lucas and Riley need a lot of repairs. I'm sorry for the wait. I've been so busy. Hopefully next chapter is next week:) signing out. -Jackie
