A/N: I mostly use the italic for sentences written in English but meant to be in another language, be it Trigedasleng or Italian (yes guys, Italian is my first language, so I guess I chose that so it is easier for me to handle it). And if there are no " " it's someone's thoughts.
I'm sorry if there are mistakes, English is not my language.
Leave a review if you like it!
Chapter Four: Melting Ice
Clarke wakes up as she hears the little noise of the door being opened. She has come to be very sensible to any sound and she's immediately on alert. She reaches under the pillow for her gun, but remembers she's in Aeryn's house, so it could be her and it wouldn't be nice to point a gun at her host.
However it's not Aeryn. A little girl is looking into the room. The door's just inches open and two curious eyes are staring at her.
Clarke can't say what time in the morning it is, because in winter darkness is not even a good clue to say if the sun is up.
The child doesn't draw back when she sees that Clarke is staring right back at her. Clarke tries to smile at the little girl, so that she knows Clarke will not hurt her.
"Buongiorno", Clarke says.
The girl smiles widely and opens the door a little more while greeting her good morning too.
Clarke doesn't get the chance to say anything more, because a man steps in behind the child and pulls her back. He sends her away and then turns to Clarke.
Meanwhile Clarke has stood up. She wears a dress Aeryn gave her last night and she feels slightly uncomfortable because it would make her movements more difficult if she had to defend herself.
"Aeryn!", the guy has turned again, now facing the still dark alley.
Clarke looks at the pillow and considers taking her gun out. But this man is calling Aeryn and it doesn't seem like he's going to do anything before the girl arrives.
The man shouts some more until Aeryn comes into view.
She seems surprised to see him and not pleased that he's standing in front of Clarke's now full open door. She smiles apologetically to Clarke and greets her good morning.
Again the man talks before Clarke can.
"Who the hell is she? Mawiyah said she's a stranger and you're hosting her." he doesn't low his voice. He probably doesn't know that Clarke can understand him.
"Calm down, uncle. She's Daire. She comes from the south, she needed somewhere to stay." Aeryn's voice is calm but firm.
"And so you thought it would have been wise to take her into your house? She's a stranger! And for the time being any stranger is a possible danger. You cannot trust people this easily! You're endangering not only your life, but also your sister's!"
At this Aeryn doesn't answer, but she doesn't back off neither.
The man shouldn't shout like that and probably shouldn't give a show like that in front of the dangerous stranger, but he's still right. Clarke too thought that Aeryn shouldn't have trusted her like that, though she was grateful the girl did.
"Mi dispiace causare problemi, signore. Posso assicurarle che non ho alcuna cattiva intenzione nei vostri riguardi, anche se lei ne dubita giustamente. Sono arrivata da poco dal sud e non conosco queste terre. Avevo bisogno di una mano e sua nipote รจ stata tanto gentile da offrirmi aiuto. Ha la mia parola che non le farei mai del male." I'm really sorry to cause you trouble, sir. I can assure you I have no bad intentions, even if you doubt it of course. I've just arrived from the south and I do not know these lands. I needed help and your niece was so kind to grant it. You have my word that I would never try to hurt her. Clarke tries to soothe him by speaking his language and assuring him of her good intentions. He looks at her surprised, not expecting a girl from the south to talk their language.
"You speak our language. How is that?" The man looks at her suspiciously.
"My grandmother came from here."
It isn't easy for Clarke to convince the man, Eber, that she's not a threat. But eventually Aeryn manages to make him go.
When her uncle is gone, Aeryn takes Clarke to have breakfast with her sister.
Clarke finds out that the little girl who woke her, Mawiyah, is Aeryn's sister and she's seven years old.
The child is a bit shy at first, but she's soon telling Clarke everything about her job in the village. She helps the healer together with another girl a bit older than her, and she wants to be an healer herself when she grows up.
Mawiyah also tells Clarke about her friends and how once they escaped the soldiers.
Clarke smiles, thinking she's just talking about some kid's prank. But then she sees that Aeryn's turned serious and she shoots a glare to her sister.
"And if you do it again, you'll be in a lot of troubles."
Mawiyah lowers her head, but then adds "They were wrong and unfair. We did well."
It's just a whisper, but Clarke can hear the sadness and the fear mixed with pride that fill the kid's voice.
She looks at Aeryn for some sort of explanation, but the girl shakes her head dejected "You will see."
They finish their breakfast and then Mawiyah leads Clarke outside and through the village.
At first Clarke doesn't understand what she is meant to see, but soon she starts to realize that not only the houses are poor, but also that the people are not happy. She sees old people sitting behind windows made of Roman glass. As they work at some clothes or common item there's just sadness and sorrow in their eyes.
As they pass almost everyone looks at Clarke with mistrusting and worry. Clarke sees that some of them, usually the younger ones, wears bandages and they seem a bit wounded. Clarke thinks they're hunters, but Aeryn voice explains otherwise.
"Some of us still try to fight the soldiers. And they're lucky to be alive." she seems to be keeping herself from speaking further, so it's Clarke who asks.
"Why would they need to fight the soldiers?"
The way Aeryn looks at her fills Clarke with sadness. "They come here and take our things, our food, our dignity. Sometimes our bodies." she looks ashamed and scared.
"The Queen, she doesn't say anything? She just lets them?"
"She doesn't care. And maybe she's the one who orders this in the first place." the girl is whispering now. Like if she feared that someone could hear her and tell the soldiers next time they come.
Clarke feels rage filling her veins. "Is it like this everywhere in the reign?"
Aeryn nods slowly. Mawiyah has a dark look on her face and she bows her head.
They remain silent for a while. Clarke keeps looking around. Some houses are made in wood or stones. A little child runs out of a house and a man runs after him, calling him and telling him to come back. The child laughs and doesn't stop until the man reaches him and stops his son by hugging him.
She also sees kids working, but no one playing.
Mawiyah gently takes her hand to lead her away from the little main road. They step into a small street and the child doesn't let go of her hand until they're facing a building a little bigger than the houses. Aeryn tells her the healer lives here. His house and his medical room are all one.
Mawiyah seems eager to start the work day and Clarke offers her help.
"I'm a healer too. I bet you'll find my ways a bit different, but I could help."
Aeryn looks at her surprised, but she seems happy that Clarke has told something more about herself. Mawiyah takes her hand again, enthusiastic. She almost runs inside the house, dragging Clarke with her.
The healer is a kind man who appreciates Clarke's offer. Clarke knows he doesn't trust her, but she thinks they will get along well and he will understand that she really means no harm.
He's tall and thin, his eyes are grey and warm. He looks like a very good person. And even if Clarke has learnt the hard way never to trust anyone, she kind of likes him. He's name is Asher.
They haven't been there for long before another girl, a little older than Mawiyah, comes in and joins them. She's the other kid who helps the healer, Ianthe.
Clarke learns that Ianthe is an eleven-years-old child whose parents have been killed by the soldiers. She now lives with her aunt and she works all day long with the healer. She's never tired of working and Clarke understands why.
Every time the girl would stop long enough to close her eyes memories of her parents would come to her and she would feel the pain all over again. Ianthe just tries to keep her mind occupied. As Clarke does.
Asher tells Clarke she can come and help them whenever she wants or feels ready. Clarke thanks him before Aeryn is leading her out again.
As they go on walking through the village Clarke can't help but think at how poor it looks like. She wonders if it's just Cristallo or if the other Ice villages are also like this. Aeryn answers her unspoken question when she sees Clarke eyes settling on a boy without an arm.
"Ice is not like our grandparents remember it anymore. The Queen doesn't care about her people, she exploits us and abuses us. She takes our belongings and she lets her soldiers do whatever they want. If someone of us tries to defend themselves or the people they love, the soldiers punish them or sometimes kill them."
Clarke clenches her fists.
"There isn't a place that is safe from them. All villages are poor and people struggle to live, or survive. In Cristallo it's not even that bad. Being near the borders means soldiers come less frequently. Sometimes they come once a month, sometimes less. But there are places where the soldiers go and tyrannize every week or few days. Those are the villages nearer to the capital. In them misery is everywhere."
Clarke can see that talking about this causes Aeryn pain and she hesitantly reaches the girl's arm with her hand.
Aeryn smiles shaky at her and Clarke wonders who the girl lost to the soldiers' hands.
But Aeryn starts walking again and shows Clarke the rest of the village.
They meet other people and Clarke is introduced to them.
Lexa has failed.
The Coalition is broken.
Half the clans has sided with the Ice Queen against the standing of the Coalition. Four clans have confirmed their alliance with the Heda. The others haven't spoken, they've just voted against the Coalition.
Lexa doesn't know where those clans' loyalty stands. But she's almost sure they'll ally with the Ice Nation.
The Storm Nation and the Moon Clan have sent a general instead of the leaders, and they couldn't form alliances without their leaders' consent. However Lexa knows they do not stand by her side.
The Ice Queen smiles at her before leaving the tent. Lexa feels rage building up inside of her and she feels failure falling upon her.
Lexa slowly makes her way out of the tent. What should she do now? She had fought for the Coalition to stand. She had sacrificed so much for peace and alliance with the other clans.
Costia. She died. She died and Lexa gave up avenging her death to seal the peace that signed the beginning of the Coalition.
The people she had to kill, just like Gustus. They are all dead for nothing. The alliance is broken. Everything Lexa did for it is now ash.
She walks through the city, she looks at her people who just now have found peace. How can she throw them yet in another war so soon? Will they ever know peace for more than a few months?
She never will. She knows it. She doesn't deserve peace. But her people do.
She sacrificed Clarke to give her people peace. And now, that too is for nothing. Clarke died for nothing. Lexa killed her heart for nothing. Nothing.
She can't take it. She betrayed Clarke for her people, she chose her people instead of her heart, and now, not only she's lost any chance at being happy, but her people won't even get to live that peace.
She tried. She tried to be a great Commander. She tried to listen to the spirit. But now she even regrets that. If Clarke were there, maybe she'd tell Lexa a way to fix things. Maybe with Clarke's help, she could have found a way to keep the Coalition together. The sky girl's power at convincing people was extraordinary.
But now she will never have that again. Clarke will never again be there for her. She will never be there with her. With Clarke, Lexa felt like maybe, just maybe, she could have been a good person even being a ruthless commander. But now, what is she?
A warrior. A war machine. Nothing more.
She wonders if Clarke could have loved her, had she been given the time to. There's a stubborn voice in her head that keeps saying she already started loving Lexa. But what if it were true? That only would make things worse.
She fights the need to run away and let herself cry. Her people need her, she can't walk away. There will be a war soon, and her people need her in full strength.
Once again she has to leave her heart behind. She can't settle in thinking about her feelings and her sorrow.
Forgive me, Clarke. She thinks before turning in full Commander mode and storming into her throne tent summoning her general.
