A/N: I mostly use the italic for sentences written in English but meant to be in another language, be it Trigedasleng or Italian. And if there are no " " it's someone's thoughts.
I'm sorry if there are mistakes, English is not my language.
If you like it, please leave a review! Enjoy!
Chapter Ten: Sky Princess mode on – Part One
"I am Clarke of the Sky People. I am the Sky Princess. And I am the one who, alone, destroyed the Mountain."
The first who reacts is Wit. He starts laughing loudly and he looks like he's about to choke himself. "That's it! Malaya you're down, there's no shitty come back for that!"
Chayim tries to laugh along with him but it's a forced laughter and he glances suspiciously at Clarke and Nyx, the people in front of the stage are conflicted, some wear amused smiles, some other are laughing like Wit, some are just looking up stunned, waiting for Clarke to say it was a joke. Malaya, though, looks ready to murder Wit and she glares at Clarke with furious eyes, probably she doesn't even believe her, she just doesn't like being played around.
But Nyx is looking Clarke in the eyes and she hasn't said a word yet. Clarke can see emotions raging in the pool of grey of those eyes, but she can't give them a name, she's deadly nervous now because she has no idea how Nyx is going to react. One thing she knows: Nyx believes her.
Malaya is the first to catch on to it, Wit is still laughing and Clarke can see her expression changing. "Oh gods, she's serious! She's telling the truth!"
As soon as Clarke doesn't contradict her, she draws out her sword and Clarke doesn't know what to do. Looking at Nyx she knows she should have told her first and she regrets waiting, lying and telling everyone like this, it probably has been the worst way to say the truth.
"I've left my Camp after destroying the Mountain because I couldn't bear watching my people, knowing what I had done for them. I couldn't bear to stay there and go on with my life, because I didn't deserve a life anymore." Clarke is interrupted by Malaya.
"I can help you with that." she hisses as she raises her sword.
A second later the loud clunk of clashing swords reverberates in the room. Nyx has her sword pressed again Malaya's and has taken a step forward to stay between her and Clarke. The sky girl can't believe that Nyx is still defending her after she lied all this time.
"Go on." Nyx's voice is cold and distant, but she's allowing Clarke to explain herself and it's more than what Clarke could have asked for.
"I don't know for how long I've travelled. When I arrived here I was broken and empty. I've survived woods and forests, and I probably was hoping not to survive at all. But here I am. A girl from your village helped me, she hosted me and she gave me time to heal, she didn't ask about what happened to me, she didn't ask me to tell her nothing more than what I felt like telling. She understood and I am sorry I lied to her about my identity. But what would have you done? I didn't know how you would have reacted, I didn't know what you thought about my people."
"Then you surely chose the worst place to tell the truth. We can kill you without effort. And we will." Malaya interrupts her again.
"I know. But I may say something you want to hear. As you can see I am no danger to you, I am alone and without my people, they don't even know where I am. You are fighters and could kill me if I tried anything. I can't be an ally to your Queen, because if you think about it, I wouldn't have had any time to go to her, talk to her. I came here and I stopped here. In the time that passed from the fall of the Mountain and when I arrived here, do you think I could have gone to the Queen?" No one answers, but they know she's right. "If anything I could be here for revenge. The Grounders left my people at the Mountain, they betrayed us. But if I wanted revenge, don't you think that I would have gone to the trikru? The trikruCommander is the one who betrayed me and my people." Clarke knows what she's saying makes sense, but she also knows it won't gain her their trust. Maybe she shouldn't have said anything about who she is.
"As I said, when I came here I was broken. Do you know why? I fought to save my people 'till the end. Like you, I didn't give up. And what I had to do to save them was horrible, it was so horrible that I couldn't stand it. I became a monster and I didn't want to wait for everyone to see it. Sometimes this is the price for your people's safety. Would you be ready to bear it? I took down the Mountain when I was alone, and I can help you take on your Queen. But are you ready for that? Your passion..."
"You can help us? Help? You lied to us since the start! Do you really think we would follow you?"
"I had to lie!" this time Clarke yells back at Malaya. "I couldn't just say the truth, it would have been too dangerous! You wouldn't have trusted me, and I know you don't trust me now, but you did. Some of you trusted me after spending time with me, knowing me and not just what I've done. Now I'm telling you that you have the power to free your people. Your passion is strong and if you know what happened to the Mountain's Men, you know what that passion can do. I loved my people, that's why I was able to save them! For the same reason you will be able to fight the Queen if you rise! Stand up for who you are. Fighting for who you love can destroy you, can tear you apart and make you feel awful, but you won't regret it. If I looked at myself in a glass, I would see nothing but a monster. That's the risk. But, even if I hate what I did, if I had to go back I would do the same again. I couldn't leave my friends, I couldn't let them die, and I won, I hate myself for that, but I would do it again. It killed me what I did, but my love for my friends won!"
"So, what are you suggesting? We can't fight the Queen on our own!" a voice among the crow rises.
"Don't you think there could be more people like you? You can't be the only ones who are ready to rebel and fight! What I suggest is you form an army. What I suggest is to go and find others, because I am sure there are enough people in these lands who want to stand up for themselves." Clarke feels the rush of power, the exaltation of finally be doing something. She can feel her skin burning and her heart is thumping so fast in her chest.
"And you would be leading us? Why should we trust you?" another amused voice comes out of the whispering.
"Because I'm your best chance. I fought the Mountain Men, I came here on the ground knowing nothing about how to survive here and I did, I survived, I destroyed the Mountain alone and I'm telling you that I'm ready to fight at your side! Your choice: stay here and go on playing, or follow me and let's fight!" Clarke voice is full of passion, but severe and unforgiving.
Nyx is looking at her with such an intensity, Clarke sees her in the corner of her eyes, and she can see her mind struggling to decide what to do, what to believe.
"Why would you help us? What good would come to you? You would be risking your life for people you don't even know!" the man who's speaking looks like a bear, he seems strong and his eyes are not kind.
"I told you. I am nothing after what I did. What do I have to lose? Nothing. But what do I have to win out of this? I could have a reason to fight again, I could get something to live for again. Maybe you think is stupid, but you don't know how it feels like to be broken because you did what you had to save the people you loved. You don't know what it means to die inside in order to fight for who you love 'till the end. If a fight destroyed me, a fight could put me back together, and if not, at least I will not die as a monster, but as the girl I was before, the girl who started the fight that the monster ended. That is what I win out of this. I get to feel like I was before again." Clarke struggles to keep herself together. She didn't plan to say this much, she wasn't going to open up so completely, but maybe it's what it'll take to get them to believe her. They deserve her to be honest for once.
"Yes!" the cry surprises everyone. Clarke looks to her left, shocked. "I'm with you. We have to fight!" Wit's looking at her excited and then he turns toward his friends. "Who is with me? Who is with me!" he gets some cheers, but most of the people is still waiting for something, or someone, before deciding.
"I am with you! If Dai...Clarke destroyed the Mountain, she can totally help us fight the Queen. I'm in!" Chayim yells back and steps at Wit's side.
Clarke knows that everyone is waiting for the same person she is waiting for. Even Malaya is looking at that same person everybody is looking at.
"If she were here to attack us, she would want to attack the Queen, surely not a bunch of people she didn't even know about. If she wanted to side with the Queen, she wouldn't be here. She can't be a spy, because, as Wit said we are nothing but annoying to the soldiers." As Nyx speaks Clarke feels some hope growing inside her.
"But you lied to us." and now Nyx is looking directly at her. Clarke doesn't back down, she keeps up with the little staring contest and she lets Nyx see everything she needs to.
The young warrior doesn't smile and her tone is not gentler when she speaks, but she closes her eyes for a second and goes on. "But I understand why. I'm in. We have to fight!" she turns to her people as well as her other two friends.
"So you choose to believe her?" but Malaya's voice is less accusatory this time.
Nyx looks back at her. "Yes."
"And you really think we should follow someone who doesn't even know us or our lands."
"I won't lead you. Nyx will, and I will help. You don't have to trust me, just let me help. I'll show you I can win your trust." Clarke jumps in.
"Clarke is right, we can't go on playing being warriors. We will become real warriors, we will fight for our freedom!" Nyx turns back to her friends and takes some time to watch them in the eyes. "I am ready to follow her. Are you ready to follow me?" she shouts at the crow.
The rebels cheer and shout back at the girl they always followed. Nyx raises her sword and Wit follows suit. Malaya shakes her head, but doesn't say anything and she raises her sword anyway, she may not like Clarke, but she does want to fight.
"First we train harder than ever." Nyx says.
"Second, we go to other villages to find more people ready to rebel." Clarke finishes.
The people cheer again and they go back to the training area, more motivated than ever. When they're off the stage, Clarke turns to talk to Nyx, but the girl doesn't let her speak.
"Malaya and I will start organize what we're going to need for this journey. We'll have to send more than a couple of groups and we need to organize supplies." she says. "Chayim you should keep an eye on the training ones, help them and ask Liri to come with you, she'll put them in place."
Chayim smiles amused and she turns to Wit. "You stay with Clarke. Answer her questions, introduce her to whoever she wants, tell her some more about the lands we're going to travel. If you go back to the village, don't use the secret passages." she adds the last sentence after a sharp look from Malaya. Nyx sighs and finally faces Clarke.
Clarke is about to talk again, but the girl cuts her off. "Later. I'll come to you after dinner or something. We need to talk." her voice is still cold, but not so distant anymore.
Clarke knows that Nyx doesn't trust her like she was starting to just that same morning, but even now she feels like the girl understands her. She nods and Malaya takes off, heading to a door without saying a word, Nyx follows her after glancing at Clarke one last time.
When Chayim is about to leave too, Clarke finally manages to speak. "I'm sorry, guys. But I couldn't risk. My first encounter with grounders wasn't so great, so I didn't know what to expect..."
"It's okay. You're the Sky Princess! It's pretty cool." Wit smiles at her and Clarke can't decide if this boy is just a god of goodness, or if he's quite stupid in his believing her. She hasn't known him long enough to judge him, but in these last days she has seen that he is actually smart and he doesn't trust anyone, so maybe he's not being naïve, just kind and friendly.
"Yeah, don't worry, we understand why you had to do it. I don't know if I'm more excited or worried about you being who you are. But Wit is right anyway, it's pretty cool, you're kind of a legend among grounders. Voices from the south talked about you as if you were some incredible warrior who could destroy an entire clan without effort." Chayim joins in to support Wit.
"Okay, let's not exaggerate." Clarke replies amused.
"Right. You'll have to tell me how you did it, at least how you found the guts to go inside there alone."
Clarke kind of goes silent at that, starting to remember that day, until Wit's voice brings her back to reality.
"Come on, Chayim, are you stupid? Don't worry, Clarke, you won't have to talk about it. And we know how you did it, you just said it. You lov..."
"I was desperate. That's how I did that, guys. Yes, I loved my friends and I was fighting for them. But when I was left alone in front of that Mountain, I didn't know what to do, I just knew I had to save them, no matter the cost. And I did, but it wasn't only love, it was also desperation." she whispers.
Wit's hand carefully comes to touch her shoulder, but before he can say anything, Malaya appears from the door the passed before.
"I forgot something. Your gun, Princess." she spits the title and eyes Wit for a moment, staring at his hand on Clarke's shoulder, but he doesn't back off. However, Clarke detaches herself from his touch and reaches for her gun. It is only fair that she gives it up. Plus, she's running out of ammo and the gun will soon be useless. She hands it to Malaya and the girl take it like if it were a snake.
She turns to leave and stops before the door. "One last thing. Don't ever think that I trust you." she pauses and looks Clarke in eyes, searching for something that she seems to find. "But if you're really willing to risk your like for a bunch of people you don't even know...if you're that stupid, you should go get a sword and start to do your best with it. I know you trained with Nyx. I don't agree. But if you want to survive, you should train as much as you can. Wit can help you, or Liri can kick your ass, as you prefer." then she disappears again and Clarke is left stunned.
Wow, she surely wasn't expecting that. Did Malaya just tried to...help? Has she just said that she's kind of okay with the rebels teaching Clarke?
"Oh. That's new. You totally got her, Princess. She may hate you, but I think she'll come to respect you...maybe she already does. O gods, Chayim do you think that is possible?" Wit is amused and shocked at the same time.
"Was that really Malaya? Come on, she couldn't be Malaya. Maybe she has a twin we didn't know about." he laughs, but Clarke sees that she wasn't the only one not expecting that.
"Guys, is she going to kill me in my sleep? Because that is what it felt like." Clarke jokes along, trying to recover.
"Yeah, maybe you should sleep with an eye open." Wit pretends to think about it. "Okay, just keep both eyes open."
Chayim laughs again and Clarke joins him. Well, maybe the all telling the truth thing didn't go that badly, after all they are laughing and joking. Chayim then says he should probably go and he leaves them alone.
Wit tells her to follow him, they're going to have a tour around again, talk a bit about what Nyx said she should know, and then they'll head for the training room.
"Hey Clarke?" he calls while he lets her pass through a door before him. Clarke turns around to look at him. "Do you have three eyes maybe? Just to be sure?"
She laughs louder this time. Wit is a dork. She likes him, totally likes him.
The leaders who refused to be allies with Lexa have left Polis and the remained leaders are holding a meeting. Luna has sent word to have scouts patrolling the borders with the Blood Clan, Lexa will probably send scouts herself on the Blood Clan's north border. But they still had to meet the leader of the Fire Clan. Now that the other leaders have left, they have called a meeting with her and the River Clan's leader, but Lexa is not hopeful about it.
Their meeting is not going so well. Lexa asked them who would side with her if a war were to start and the River Clan's leader seems now uncertain. Amhràn says that if the Storm Nation will fight against them, they have no chance. He says that if all the leaders who have left Polis will side with the Ice Nation there is no way they can win.
"And so what do you suggest? Should we surrender?" Deen is not someone that you can anger easily, but he cares for his people and he would never back off from a fight when he's fighting for their freedom and safety.
"We should try to come to terms with at least some of them. Maybe we can reach peace again."
Lexa knows why he's saying this. He's not a coward and she knows that if they will have to fight he will side with them, but his people are not warriors. His soldiers are not as strong as Lexa's. He's just trying to spare his people the need to fight and die.
"The Storm Nation accepted the alliance only because all the clans did. The King had no real interest in joining the Coalition, but he had no interest in getting against all the clans either, so he accepted. Now if the Ice Nation starts a war, he will not side with us. He has always been more ally with Ice than us, why should that change now? His lands are far enough that his people will not suffer the war and his army his strong, it will not suffer great loss." Lexa says calmly.
"What about the Moon Clan? We could get them not to fight. They have always been kind of separate from us, they never had any interest in us either and they are mostly a peaceful clan." he's probably talking out of desperation by now, but he manages to keep a façade of control and quiet.
"They also are the closest ally of the Ice Nation. They have always been ally with them. Plus, in order to reach them we should cross the Ice lands, and I doubt the Queen will let our messengers pass." Deen cuts him off.
"Right." Amhràn clenches his jaw and visibly tenses, but he doesn't say anything more.
"There still is a possibility they will not fight. They are ally with the Queen, but Amhràn is right, they are a peaceful clan, maybe they will remain neutral. Anyway, we should be ready to face them too." Luna joins the conversation trying to be diplomatic.
"Luna is right. They hardly leave their lands and try never to get involve in fights between the clans. When was the last time they joined a war?" Lexa backs her up.
"Years ago, before the Coalition was created, during the last great war between all the clans." Bry hasn't spoken a lot in the meeting.
"They did not actually fight that war, because that war stopped with the Coalition, they just sided with Ice and protected the Ice lands during the whole conflict. It was before. When Kyr was King, before he sealed the peace with the Commander." Deen corrects her.
"Right. Last time they agreed to help the Queen by protecting her territory, but they didn't come at war with us. They did not get against us as a clan. They never actually followed the Queen in her wars, the last one they sided with was Kyr." Luna goes on.
"So maybe they will not side with the Queen this time either." Amhràn finished, his voice holding the smallest hint of relief.
"Perhaps. But we have to be ready. Even if the Moon Clan will not come to fight us in our lands, we won't be able to attack Ice back if they will be there protecting the Queen's territory." Lexa warns them and then she settles that it is enough for now. She tells them to ready their army and train their warriors, because it doesn't matter if they will win or lose, thy will fight.
Deen and Luna agree with her, Amhràn does as well after a moment of uncertainty, but Bry doesn't. The Fire Clan's leader says they'll remain neutral. Lexa tries to make her see reason, she tells her that the Queen won't stop in front of the hostility of the Fire lands, she tells her that Tecla wants the people, not the territory. But Bry doesn't change her mind.
"I can not afford to throw my people yet in another war if there is the possibility that we will not be attacked. If the Queen attack our lands, we will fight. But I can not send my warriors to defend your lands when it is not sure that they would have had to fight otherwise."
Lexa feels rage building up inside of her. If Bry backs off from the war, they will be four clans against six or seven, they will have no chance at all. But then, would they have a chance anyway? If the Storm Nation fights they probably are already dead. And this thought just makes her more furious.
"What about the Blood Clan? If we are right, and we must be because if it's not them then it could only be you or the Boat People, they allied with Ice. If I recall correctly there is not a great friendship between you and them. Do you think they will stop at your lands? They live in a hostile territory too, sure not as hostile as yours, but still they are used to a hard life." she hopes she can get her to understand that her clan needs to fight. She could feel bad for pushing her so much, but she doesn't have time for that.
Bry looks angry. "I will see how the situation evolves and I will talk with my generals. But for now my answer does not change." she says between gritted teeth. She then storms out of the tent and Lexa calls the end of the meeting.
Outside Indra is waiting for her Heda and when Lexa exits the tent she reports the news about TonDC and she tells the Commander that everything is going well.
Lexa feels some relief at seeing Indra, but thinking about TonDC makes her think about Clarke and she curses herself for her weakness. She can't think about the girl now, but she can't push her out of her mind.
She doesn't want to talk to Indra anymore, she needs a stronger distraction. Every time Clarke comes in her mind, knocking out every other thought, Lexa goes sparring with her warriors. A good fight is always a good escape from her memories and weakness. Feeling the heavy sword in her hand, holding it firmly and swaying it in a lethal dance always manages to ground her and at the same time to take her away from the real word, in a performance of perfection and grace that holds no weakness.
So she tells Indra to go to Fern and he will tell her about everything that happened. Then she's off heading for the training area, again and again. Fighting is the only thing that keeps her from losing herself even more.
