A/N: I mostly use the italic for sentences written in English but meant to be in another language, be it Trigedasleng or Italian. And if there are no " " it's someone's thoughts.

I'm sorry if there are mistakes, English is not my language.

If you like it, please leave a review! Enjoy!

I won't update too often for a month or so 'cause I need to study for some exams so forgive me. Also come and tell me about the end of this chapter.


Chapter Eleven: Falling for liars

"I don't know how to tell you this, but I want you to hear it from me and not someone else." Clarke starts awkwardly staring at the ground. When her eyes shyly look up at Aeryn they find a warm smile and Clarke's stomach turns, knowing that in a matter of seconds the smile will fall from that beautiful face.

"I haven't been utterly honest with you and I am so sorry. I couldn't risk to tell you when I didn't even know you. I guess that I still don't know you, but you and your people have shown me so much trust, I'd never want to betray it. When Nyx trusted me enough to take me to the rebels' shelter I felt so bad 'cause I wasn't telling the whole truth. So at one point," Clarke laughs bitterly "a bad point I might add, I just said that. So, before you find out from others" Clarke tries to stop rambling and get to the point, but she just can't help it. She doesn't want to hurt Aeryn, she may be the only person Clarke could get to call a friend in a long time.

"What's the matter, Daire? You can tell me. You said that you couldn't risk, I und..."

"My name is not Daire." Aeryn's voice is so sweet, Clarke can't stand it any longer. But Aeryn's reaction is not quite like Clarke expected it to be. The girl doesn't seem so surprised.

"Okay, so are you going to tell me your name? I understand if your story is difficult to tell, you're not forced to, we have time."

But we may haven't got time. Clarke says quietly to herself. "My name is Clarke. I come from the people who fell from the sky, I'm the one called Sky Princess." It's done. For the second time that day a wave of relief rushes through Clarke, but it doesn't last long because Aeryn's eyes have gone wide and the girl moves her hand to cover her mouth.

Clarke lowers her head, she tries to say something but what could she say? She doesn't want to justify herself, there is no excuse for how she has been lying to the girl all this time.

"You're the destroyer of the Mountain." Aeryn's voice is just a whisper and shock fills it.

There it is, her great sin; there it is, Aeryn can now see the murderer.

"You're the reason our people are safe from the Mountain Men."

Oh Clarke did so not see this coming. "What?" she looks up in disbelief.

Aeryn smiles sadly. "I'm sorry. I know that for you it must have been horrible. But if it weren't for you our people would still be fearing the Mountain, probably without you the trikru Commander couldn't even have saved the ones of us in the Mountain. Cristallo is near the border, the Mountain Men didn't venture far in the Ice territory, but we were always in danger. Thank to you we aren't any more."

Clarke is left speechless. Of all the things she surely wasn't expecting this, more like something completely different. Aeryn is... grateful? To her? To Clarke? To a monster? Maybe Clarke doesn't know Ice language so well, maybe she totally misunderstood. Yeah, it must be like that.

"I'm sorry for all you had to go through, for all you still are going through." Aeryn says sweetly before slowly reaching out for Clarke. She looks at Clarke for permission and when she sees that the sky girl still can't process what she's said, Aeryn gently pulls her into a warm, soft hug. Her touch is faint and careful not to scare Clarke but the girl flinches anyway. She's not used to this anymore, she hasn't received a real hug in such a long time.

But this is Aeryn who's hugging her and it's Aeryn who's forgiving her for lying, so Clarke lets herself fall in the girl's arms, just for this moment, just this time. She only allows herself to be held for a small moment, a short now that she shares with someone she suddenly realizes she cares about. Oh god, Clarke actually cares about Aeryn, this is bad. This is dangerous. She shouldn't be making true friends, she knows she will lose them sooner or later and it will be painful. But in this little now of theirs, she doesn't really care about the future, so she allows herself to shed some tears. She cries quietly, almost not breaking the silence, with Aeryn's hand caressing her back; she cries for herself, she cries for the girl she was before, she cries for her lost friends, she cries for what could have been. She even cries for Lexa, but she won't ever admit that, she can't.

"If something can break, it also can be fixed." Aeryn whispers quietly, not wanting to break the forgiving moment.


"Lexa..." Indra whispers only to herself.


Clarke isn't sure about when they broke the hug the night before, but she wakes up in the comfortable bed and she welcomes the foreign feeling in her heart. For once she actually knows that something is good. A small, little, invisibly important part of her life is good.

She told Aeryn her story, she told her what she did, she told her how she couldn't bare staying with her people after that. She told her how sometimes in the woods she has hoped she would die. And Aeryn listened, and maybe she didn't understand everything, but she stayed. She stayed at her side, she didn't judge her, she didn't offer forgiveness for what Clarke did, but she offered friendship, comfort, warmth. She offered faith where Clarke couldn't have faith in herself, she offered trust where Clarke believed to deserve only disappointment and silence. She granted a smile to the darkest part of Clarke. And it was enough.

Only for once, only for that night, it was enough.

When Clarke comes out of Asher's house, after talking to him and gaining his trust by telling him too her whole story, she finds Nyx waiting for her. Clarke is so not ready for this, but she gives Nyx a nod anyway and she follows the girl down the street toward the woods.

"You lied. I understand that you would have been risking too much telling us the truth. But I endangered the people I care the most about, I took you to them and you knew how important they are for me, and you kept lying to me." Nyx is not looking at her, instead Clarke sees her back and she wishes she could see the storm in the brunette's eyes.

Clarke knows that saying something now would be useless, so she struggles to keep silent.

"I was stupid, I just proved that Malaya was right. Just tell me one thing." Nyx slowly turns around. She stares Clarke in the eyes and the sky girl can see the hurt there, though Nyx is trying to keep it at bay. "When did you plan to tell me? Or maybe you didn't plan to tell me at all?"

"I wanted to tell you yesterday morning. No, hell, I wanted to tell you much earlier than that, but it felt stupid, I trusted you and that was the problem. Last time I trusted someone in so little time... Well I guess it's thank to her that I am the destroyer of the Mountain. After you introduced me to the rebels, after you showed me so much trust, I was going to tell you. I surely didn't plan on telling you like that." Clarke tries to keep her voice low and apologetic, but she knows it's just not good enough.

Nyx looks away from her, her gaze lost somewhere behind the trees, behind the world. "As I said, I don't believe you're dangerous for us, I don't think you're here to harm us. That doesn't mean I trust you."

"Thank you, Ny..."

"Liri told me you trained yesterday. She told me you're not too bad, she wants you to go back today, she'll train you herself everyday until we leave. We should be ready to go in a week or so, I don't think it will take too long to organize. Tomorrow we'll decide where to go, where to start and how to approach the people in the villages." Nyx doesn't give her any time to say more, Clarke is starting to feel annoyed about this habit of hers.

"You should come. We have a lot to discuss and you seem to be good with speeches." with that the girl turns her back at Clarke and starts walking further into the forest.

"Nyx! Wait! I know you don't trust me, but, for what it's worth, I only lied about my identity and where I come from. All you know about me and about how I am it's true, I haven't lied about that. So I know you won't believe me now, but the things you knew about me before are still true. I just needed to tell you." she tells the trees in front of her, but she knows that Nyx has heard her.

Why is Clarke doing this? Letting her heart out for what? Trying to show a girl she merely knows that she cared enough to be honest about herself even when she was lying about her identity? Why? Why is Nyx important, why is Aeryn important? It's too soon. Too soon to care about people again, it shouldn't be that easy for Clarke to care about someone so soon. It's not right. But they have been so fair, so kind, so friendly and understanding to Clarke, how could she not care?

She really has a problem.


In that week Clarke trains like never before, Liri is tough and she never gives Clarke a break, but she's an amazing warrior and Clarke learns so much from her. Clarke can't say if Liri likes her of if she hates her, the warrior is so difficult to read that at some point Clarke just gives up trying.

With Malaya things have smoothed down a bit, the rebel still very openly dislikes Clarke, but sometimes the sky girl can catch a sparkle of respect in the other's look. She seems to keep an eye on Clarke, she's always near her when Clarke is at the rebels' shelter, she follows her like a shadow. Clarke decides she's content enough with the fact that the girl hasn't tried to kill her yet.

She also sees Faith again and the younger girl looks just as eager as the first time they met. Eager about what? Anything, Clarke imagines. The girl simply shines with life and looks like a tiny ball of power and excitement. This time Clarke also sees how the other rebels look at Faith, as if she were their hope, as if she were the little sister of everyone and Clarke realizes that the girl really has a gift. No matter who she's talking to, if she wants to make someone smile, she will succeed.

Clarke spends a lot of time with Chayim and Wit and from dinner to bed time she's always with Aeryn, trying to make it up to her for having lied. Her host doesn't change her attitude around Clarke and things would be just like before if it weren't for Mawiyah. As soon as the little girl knows about Clarke she doesn't stop asking her about the sky, about the war, about the Mountain Men and the reapers. Kind of about anything. Clarke feared Aeryn's sister's reaction, she feared the little girl would have hated Clarke for lying, but maybe she should have feared this kind of reaction more. The girl is just way too much excited about Clarke being the Sky Princess and Clarke wouldn't get a break from her. But it's good, it feels good to be accepted, in a way or another.

The only person Clarke misses during the week is Nyx, and she actually misses her more than she should. She does see the rebel at the meetings when they discuss about the journey, but she misses talking to her, sparring with her, just spending time with her. They don't talk about Clarke's lies again, but Clarke knows they will have time since they're going to travel together. Near the end of the week it gets easier, though. Nyx doesn't avoid her eyes so much anymore and maybe she doesn't trust Clarke, but the sky girl can see that she wants Clarke to earn her trust again. And Clarke will do her best. There's a weird connection between them and Clarke knows that Nyx is curious about it too. She just tries not to think about how she had felt an immediate connection with Lexa as well. She must not think about it.

And finally the day comes when they're about to leave. Clarke wakes in the bed in Aeryn's house and enjoys the comfort for some minutes before getting up. She gets dressed and gathers the few things she has to bring with her, she knows the rebels are bringing the majority of what she'll need so she just takes the knives Liri has given her, her gun with the little ammos that are left in her bag and a the backpack in which she has her sketchbook and little more.

When she meets Aeryn for a quick breakfast, the girl wears an unreadable look on her face and she seems lost in her thoughts even if she's staring at Clarke. They don't speak much and Clarke goes to say goodbye to Mawiyah who's still sleeping but who has insisted that Clarke came to her before leaving.

While Clarke is with the little girl, Aeryn puts something in her backpack before handing it to Clarke when she comes back.

That's it, this is when the journey begins, this is when Clarke starts to actually do something to help these people. To maybe redeem herself somehow. Or maybe not; helping these people, helping Aeryn and Nyx's people will be enough. Clarke stands in the threshold of the house and just stares in front of her for a while.

It feels like forever before Clarke turns back to greet Aeryn goodbye and the girl leans in to kiss her.

Aeryn's lips are soft, sweet and the pressure the girl applies is kind, the brush of her lips on Clarke's is caring and shy. She tastes like trust, faith, hope. For a moment Aeryn almost tastes like a second chance.