Just for a second, Alec didn't recognise his surroundings. As he blearily opened his eyes to the light of the newly-risen sun, it was as if he was back at the Institute. But he was not - that much became evident after a few seconds. He sat up, running a hand through his hair, and feeling his shoulder ache. That was strange - Jace had healed it, but it still hurt. Not in the same inflamed way as before, but in a different way. As if the pain was not in his skin, but in his muscles, in his bones. He winced as he stretched his arms, shaking them to wake them up from where they had lost the sensation of touch. In the course of the night, he seemed to have shifted so he wasn't leaning on the log, but rather lying parallel to it, and not only that, but he was pressed closely against the log, as if he was spooning it. He brushed the dirt off his clothes, out of his hair, and hoped to the Angel that nobody had seen that.
"You're missing Magnus."
Alec looked over to Simon, where he was sitting on a rock. There was nothing condescending about that statement, or inflammatory, or mean-spirited at all. It was simply a fact, and evidently, a fact worthy of wishing someone a good morning with.
Alec shrugged. "Yeah. You're missing Isabelle and Clary."
Simon smiled a little. "Not in the same way as you're missing Magnus."
Before Alec could say anything, Simon continued. "I miss Izzy and Clary, don't get me wrong. Of course I do. You do too. Even Narcissus over there would. All of us are missing the others, and I'd like to think they're all missing us too. But the thing about missing someone is that often, you don't really miss them. You just miss their company. I miss Izzy's company. I miss Clary's company. But you… you miss Magnus in a different, more wholesome way. You miss him. You're worried for his safety, not your own. You're… you really love him."
Alec felt his face go red, not because Simon was talking about Magnus, but instead because Simon was focussing so much attention on him. He began to shrug, to shake his head, but all he could manage was a jumble of weak gestures.
"So what?"
It came out more defensive than he intended, but he could tell Simon didn't take it to heart.
"You really miss him. Wow. Alec… I think I'm ready to admit I… screwed up. Majorly. I have acted selfish, I know, and… and I can't even bring myself to truly miss Clary. And she's my best friend. I've acted like an asshole, I haven't given much consideration to how you feel at all, and seeing as it's about 50% my fault you're in this mess, I want to apologise."
Alec smirked, clearly enjoying Simon's dramatic flair, and gestured with his hand for him to continue. The apologetic grin dropped from his face.
"What else do I need to do? I mean, I thought it was just Magnus who had that thing with choreographed apologies, but I could always do some sort of impromptu interpretive dance if that would help sell my point."
"As amusing as that would be," Alec said, "I'll spare you the embarrassment. I simply meant that there was someone else you needed to apologise to."
"Who?"
"Take a stab in the dark."
"Is it like… Jesus or something? Because I'm Jewish, so - "
"Jace. It's Jace."
"No. No. Just… no."
"Simon," Alec said in a warning tone. "Jace deserves your apology just as much as you deserve his."
Simon froze, frowning, obviously displeased with how true Alec's sentiment was. If Alec watched closely, he could see the subtle shifts in Simon's expression as he debated with himself as to what he was should do.
After much deliberation, Simon cast a cursory glance at Jace, and relief flooded his face. "It doesn't matter now, anyway. He's asleep."
"He won't be for long," Alec said, and with that, he picked up a rock and pegged it at Jace. Simon yelped in surprise, but the rock fell short of Jace's face by a few centimetres. Alec smiled smugly, having aimed perfectly, and enjoying Simon's startled exclamations. Jace's eyes flickered open, and he hurried into a sitting position, reaching for where his seraph blade should have been.
Simon looked, impressed, at Alec. Alec grinned. "If you ever want to wake up a shadowhunter, just throw something at them. Their cat-like reflexes will usually jolt them awake."
Jace realised what had happened, and turned his sour expression to Alec. He flipped him off half-heartedly. Alec smiled cheerily, waving at him. Jace rolled his eyes, and stood up, brushing the dirt off his clothes.
"Simon… do you have something you want to say to Jace?"
Alec looked over to catch Simon's panicked expression. "Uh… now? Like… right now?"
Jace seemed mildly interested now, and his casual expression of superiority had again taken residence on his still-bruised face.
"Yes. You're in the zone. You're ready. Go forth, young padawan. May the force be with you."
Simon smiled, and Alec clapped him on the back. There was nothing like a nerd reference to boost Simon's confidence.
"Uh… Jace. I am… sorry, I guess? I apologise for… being… what was that word you used, Alec?"
"Simon," Alec said calmly, indicating for him to continue.
"I just want to get the word right, you know? Okay. Selfish? Was it? Or no - self-obsessed. Scratch that. Selfish sounds a little better, doesn't it? Okay. Sorry for being a bit selfish. I didn't intend to. I just… don't want to die, you know? I mean - can you blame me? Dying… you know, it's not… fun…" Simon trailed off, kicking at some leaves at his feet.
Jace laughed to himself, but when Alec's expectant gaze turned to him, he too found tremendous interest in the dirt around him.
"Do you want to say something in response, Jace?"
"Not really."
"Jace."
"Alec."
"Jace."
"Alec."
A series of hurried glances passed, Alec raising his eyebrows, challenging Jace to be mature. Jace shook his head in response, his eyes widening in concern. Simon looked up to see more wordless communication ensue, with Alec's expression becoming more and more unimpressed. After a while, Jace cleared his throat, and maintaining eye contact with Alec, began to apologise.
"Simon - "
"I'm over here," Simon said, enjoying his forced apology. With a glower, Jace redirected his gaze towards Simon.
"Simon," he said, pausing to allow any further interjections. When none came, he continued. "Simon. Um. I guess I'm sorry too."
He nodded, looking at Alec for approval. He found none and instead received an eye roll and a condescending stare.
"Fine. Right. Well. I… assume that some may… describe my prior behaviour as… somewhat selfish. If, on the off chance, you… agree, uh - sorry. There."
"Jace." Alec's tone was flat and bored.
"Look, mate, I fucked up. Okay? So did you, but you know that. It's both of our fault. Great. Alec, I'm sure I speak for this dipshit as well when I say that I am sorry for this whole mess. You deserve better than us."
"Cool it with the melodrama, Jace, I just wanted sincerity." Alec winked at Simon, who was duly taken aback at Alec's confidence. As Alec began to walk away, head held high, Simon turned to Jace, who was equally confused.
"What's up with him?"
Jace shrugged. They stood in silence for a second, until the awkwardness became unbearable, and Jace picked up a rock.
"What the hell are you doing?"
Jace smiled as if he and Simon were sharing an inside joke. "Let's see how Alec appreciates being used as a target."
Simon barely had time to respond before Jace pegged the rock at Alec, where it landed a few centimetres short of his feet.
"Asshole," Alec called out, barely looking up.
"Love you too, buddy."
Clary woke up slowly, almost refusing to admit that she was awake. But when she opened her eyes, she was surprised to see daylight instead of dark.
"Huh?"
Magnus, who she was still resting on, looked at her. "Good morning, biscuit. How was your night?"
"You didn't wake me up," she whispered, her voice still asleep.
Magnus made a small noise of admittance, but he shrugged it off. "I figured I'd let you sleep."
"Did you wake Izzy?"
"Nah."
"What - did you - "
"I couldn't sleep. Don't make a big deal of it."
"You didn't have to. It's not as if Izzy and I aren't capable of - "
"Don't flatter yourself, hon. I just wasn't tired. I had all of yesterday to sleep."
"You didn't… go off anywhere?"
"Of course not," Magnus said, laughing quietly. "I may be besotted, but I'm not stupid."
Izzy made a small noise, as if her sleeping self wanted to contribute to the conversation. In her peripheral vision, Clary saw Magnus look at Izzy with a gentle kind of adoration. A familial kind of adoration.
"Magnus?"
"Mhmm?"
"They're okay. I know they are."
As awkward as it sounded to say out loud, Magnus' grateful smile made her feel better. She had taken a while to get to sleep, wracked with anxiety over the others - she could only imagine how much worse it was for Magnus. Not only was he apart from Alec, but his magic, that could have led them straight to him, was failing him.
"I don't want to disturb Iz, but … we should probably get going soon," Clary said, sitting up and instantly missing the comforting warmth of Magnus' chest against her shoulder. He nodded, and ever so gently shook her awake. Izzy woke quickly - she hadn't been fully asleep anyway - and stood up. Her ankle was still tender, but she gave no indication of that. She was just as fearful as them for the safety of the others, and though both Clary and Magnus assured her that her injury wasn't an inconvenience, she knew that if she was outwardly in pain, it'd stress them even more. And so she put on a brave facade and walked around as if the throbbing pain of her ankle was no more of a hindrance than a rock in her shoe.
They had no food, so it didn't take them long to begin moving again. The river was a relatively straight line, curving gently every now and then. The ease at which they were able to navigate it made Clary worry. If it was so easy to walk along the river, then why the hell had the others not made it back?
Magnus was worried too. They hadn't wanted to risk tracking the others again, for fear it would weaken him further. So, they were just clinging to the hope that they had had the sense to stay put, wherever they were.
They walked in silence, all lost in their own thoughts, before Isabelle said, "we should probably make noise. You know… in case they hear us before we see them."
"Good point," Clary agreed. "What should we discuss?"
"Magnus?" Izzy asked.
He turned around. "What? Discuss me? Well, if you insist, but it could get a little awkward."
"I was asking if you had any suggestions. You're usually one to know what to talk about."
Magnus laughed, and soon Izzy and Clary did too. They were tired - all of them, completely fatigued - and they just needed a chance to calm down.
"Okay, then. Hmm. Let's… huh. I'm really not sure."
"That's a first," Clary mumbled.
Magnus rolled his eyes. "Fine, Clarissa. If you have anything to discuss, be my guest."
She shrugged. "We could play a game."
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Izzy asked.
"FMK?"
Magnus raised an eyebrow. "What on earth is that?"
Clary and Izzy shared a smug smile. "I have a feeling you're going to like this game."
Now that a degree of peace had been restored, the tension had mostly resolved itself. That, however, didn't change the fact that they were bored. Jace had found a sturdy, horizontal branch, and was doing chin-ups. Alec was pacing. Simon was watching them both with a mixture of confusion, admiration, and boredom.
The sky above them was white, bright but covered in clouds. There were darker clouds to the east, threatening to rain on them, but Simon figured they were half an hour or so away at least. They had time.
"Sixty-eight…" Jace finally released his grip on the branch, covered in sweat. His face was flushed red from the effort, but he seemed so content with himself that it almost looked effortless. The bruise on his face had turned dark, with an unappealing yellow undertone. Simon didn't have time to look away before Jace caught him staring.
"Jealous, mundane?"
Simon shrugged. Of course he was, a little. Not only was Jace superhumanly strong, but he still managed to look attractive when half of his face looked like a bruised banana.
"How many do you reckon you can get in?"
Simon stood up and took off his hoodie. There was something condescending about Jace's asking that he needed to address. He was strong, right? He could get at least forty.
Or so he thought.
Jace whistled lowly, a look of feigned surprise on his face. "Well then. You've got sixty-eight to beat."
"Piece of cake," Simon muttered.
When Alec stopped pacing and turned around, he noticed two things. The first was that Simon was suspended from a branch, trying to pull himself up, his face red and contorted into a strained expression. Secondly, Jace was watching him amusedly.
"Is Simon doing chin-ups?"
Jace nodded. Simon, who appeared to be using all the strength that he could muster, succeeded in pulling himself up once more before falling limply back to where he had begun.
"How many has he done?"
Simon was panting, the redness in his face bleeding down to his neck, sweat patches on his t-shirt.
"Four."
"And a half," Simon added breathily.
Alec looked at Simon, at his pathetic attempt at fitness, and at Jace, who was enjoying it a little too much.
Something in him wanted to scream and slap both of them, because how the hell could they be doing chin-ups at a time like this? What if the others were lost, or hurt, or worse? What if?
"Can I say that I'd sleep with all three of them?"
"No, Magnus."
"Why not?"
"That's just not how the game works. We've told you that already."
"I don't like this game us much as you thought I would," he admitted.
"That's because you're not playing it right," Clary said.
Izzy nodded. "You can't just keep asking to sleep with everyone. It doesn't work that way."
Magnus shrugged. "Fine. I say we talk about something else, then."
"If you can come up with anything, be my guest."
Silence fell, but something about it seemed almost calculated. Isabelle looked at Magnus, who was staring with determination ahead of them. She caught Clary's eye, who nodded subtly. Magnus had something he wanted to say. He was just waiting for the right time.
"Well," he began, still staring ahead. Clary had never seen him this flustered when Alec wasn't around.
And then, it clicked.
Alec.
"Isabelle… I don't really know why I'm so nervous… wait a sec…"
Izzy glanced at Clary, her eyes wide and excited. Magnus wrung his hands. "Okay. Okay. God, I'm so nervous over nothing. I just want to know… uh… if I was to… I don't know, hypothetically ask Alexander to move in with me… would he… agree? Hypothetically, of course, because - "
He didn't get to finish because Isabelle had almost barrelled him over with a hug. "Yes! Of course he would!"
"But… the Institute…"
"Ha! Don't worry about that. We'll cope without him around. It just means he won't be hogging the training room so often."
Magnus' nervous smile grew in size and confidence until his own grin was bigger than Izzy's. "Holy shit. Okay. I'm going to do this."
Clary was beaming too, and she joined in the hug. Maybe, in all of this tumult, there was something worth celebrating.
There was a peal of thunder, loud and interrupting, and before anyone could make anything of it, rain began to fall.
Simon let go of the branch, the rain making it too hard to hold on any longer.
"Quitting?"
"I call interference. I would have been able to do more if there was no rain."
"Sure."
"How much did I get all up?"
"Eleven."
Simon looked at the ground, defeated. Jace sighed.
"When I first started training, my personal best was eight in a row."
Simon looked up. "Yeah, but you were what - ten years old?"
Jace shrugged. "Yeah, well, you haven't had all that much practice. Up until now, you've been coasting on vampire strength. But don't worry. All this means is you can improve."
Simon raised an eyebrow. "I'm sorry - did I mishear you? Did you just… encourage me?"
"Drop it," Jace said lowly. But Simon did not.
"Alec! Alec! Guess what! Jace just tried to inspire me!"
"Shut it, mundane."
"Alec! Hey - "
"Are you kidding me?" Alec snapped. His confidence from the morning was quickly wearing thin, as it was almost midday and there was still no sign of the others. Simon's amused smirk quickly faded.
"Sorry, Alec, but - "
"Just… by the Angel, just stop! Aren't you worried? At all?"
Jace frowned. "Hey, Alec, don't - "
"Don't what? Worry?"
"Don't freak out," Jace said. "Everything will be okay."
"But they're… they're still not here…" Alec trailed off, panic overtaking his words. Simon gulped - he had never seen Alec so stressed. The rain was falling in fat droplets, and they left streaks down Alec's face as they washed the dirt away. Jace was calmly talking to Alec in a low voice. Simon had to admit - there were times when he doubted how close the other two were (including the past day or so), but seeing them now, so focused on each other, Jace so determined to calm Alec down - it was as if the parabatai bond was visible.
In those moments, when Simon was watching them so closely, he felt the acute, crushing feeling of being powerless.
Was he so selfish for wanting to be useful?
Was he so selfish for wanting to be involved?
Over the ever-growing roar of the river and the booming thunder that filled the valley they were trapped in, Simon heard something.
Something faint, but high-pitched.
A voice.
A voice he knew better than anyone else.
"Clary!"
"Oh God."
They stood there, the three of them, staring at the river. Their celebrations had been interrupted by rain, and as they had picked up the pace and made their way downstream quicker, Isabelle had spotted something. Another branch of the river, just across from them, coursing angrily in the thickening storm.
"The river… it forks…"
"They have to have waited somewhere near here, right?"
Clary looked at Magnus, who was standing in solemn silence. He noticed her staring and coughed a little. "At least we know why they haven't found us yet. They wouldn't have known which branch to go up."
"Or they went up the wrong one," Izzy said breathily.
Clary closed her eyes. This was bad. She just needed to think.
She just needed -
"Clary!"
Her eyes snapped open.
"Was that - "
"Clary! Izzy! Magnus!"
Isabelle turned to Clary. "That's Simon. That's Simon!"
Clary didn't need Isabelle's confirmation - she had already run to the river, scanning the surrounding banks for the others.
And, like a beacon in the dark, there Simon was, standing on the opposite bank, waving with a mad grin on his face. "Clary!"
"Simon! Are you guys okay?"
"Couldn't be better!"
She laughed in spite of herself. They were okay, they were safe. She had had no reason to be so nervous. The lump in her throat had almost disappeared. Simon was there, bags under his eyes, glasses missing, clothes muddied, but God, he was safe, he was okay, he was… he was there. Part of her wanted to cry.
Simon was tearing up, too. Clary. He had missed her, so incredibly much, even if it was just her company that he felt the absence of. He wanted to cross to her side of the river, but the current was getting stronger with the rain, which was still falling, in fatter and fatter drops. By this point in time, Jace and Alec had realised the others were there and were running out to greet them. Jace stopped at the water's edge, his face flooded with relief.
"You're okay?"
Clary nodded. Izzy had hobbled her way over to where she was standing and was holding her hand to her mouth. She, too, was speechless with relief. She was tired, so incredibly tired, and seeing their trek come to an end - it almost made her legs give way.
Simon took a deep breath, trying to focus. Okay. Now all that they needed to do was cross the river. Before he could think of a way to do that, however -
"Magnus!"
Jace's startled cry brought him back to the real world, to see Magnus running, full pelt, straight into the river. Isabelle gasped. "Magnus! Stop! The river's too strong!"
But he did not stop. He flailed his way through the raging water, half running, half swimming, trying, by any means possible, to get across.
Alec stumbled out onto the bank of the river. He did not see Clary, or even Isabelle. He did not see Jace or Simon. All he saw was Magnus struggling to get across to him. He was fighting against the river, and he was losing.
Alec felt dizzy - he had dreaded Magnus putting himself on the line for him, and there he was, about to be swallowed by the rushing water. His heartbeat echoed through his head as he steadied himself. Magnus, he thought, and that was the only thought reverberating through his tired mind. Magnus.
Alec was not, by any definition, stupid. In fact, out of the group, he was one of the most, if not the most, logical. But in that second, he made what was probably the most illogical decision in his life.
He threw himself into the river too.
Isabelle screamed, and Clary had to hold her back before she dove in too.
"Alec… Alec…"
Clary shook her head. "It's okay, Iz. He'll be okay."
Alec was taller than Magnus, and broader, meaning he could hold his own better against the current. Magnus was almost completely submerged, struggling to stay upright. Despite having a full day of rest, he still wasn't as strong as usual. The rain bucketed down as both fought their way into the middle of the river, Alec's eyes locked on Magnus, Magnus fighting to stay afloat.
Jace was so petrified by seeing his parabatai, his brother, his best friend fighting against a coursing river that he didn't realise what he was doing.
Simon was so completely rapt in the scene in front of him that he barely noticed Jace's hand find its way into his.
Alec could see Magnus up ahead of him. He was so close.
Magnus.
It was everywhere, roaring, tumultuous, piercingly cold and breathtakingly loud.
Another peal of thunder and the valley around them echoed. But Alec didn't hear it.
It was big and grey and everything he could see.
He found Magnus' wrist, but before Magnus could give any indication of realising that, he was pulled under the water.
He fought, fought for air, fought his way to the surface.
Magnus, Alec thought, Magnus, the name running through his head like a mantra as he swam with all his might to the other side of the river, holding his wrist with vice-like strength.
He became aware of something, another force, pulling him away from the direction of the tide.
He was almost there, almost on the other side, the water getting tantalisingly shallow. Part of Alec felt he wouldn't make it, because the river was too strong, too fucking strong, but then -
With all the strength he could muster, he followed that force.
Magnus was kicking too, pulling Alec as much as he was towing him. They half swam, half stumbled -
until the seemingly bottomless river spat him up on the riverbed.
All Alec could do was breathe. he was vaguely aware of someone - maybe Isabelle - holding his face in their shaky hands. His eyes focussed and saw his sister kneeling above him, eyes red-rimmed and awash with relief. In his peripheral vision, he could see Clary saying something to Magnus, and him nodding in response.
He's okay.
Jace made to run his hand through his hair, to play off how stressed he had been, but he found his hand occupied. He looked down to see himself gripping Simon's hand so strongly that his knuckles had turned white. Simon, finally able to snap his eyes away from the river, looked down too.
"Oh."
His first thought was to be defensive, to pretend it was a joke, or even to play it off as something for Simon's benefit, but he didn't have it in him. His eyes met Simon's.
"Don't tell anyone."
"I won't."
"I was afraid."
"I know. So was I."
Jace smiled half-heartedly. "You're a good kid, mundane."
"You too, pretty boy."
They laughed, both giddy with relief, and Jace clapped Simon on the back.
Well then, he thought.
Magnus blinked to clear his vision. His eyes were still clouded by the murky water. The red-headed one had been reprimanding him for being so stupid, but he hadn't paid enough attention to care.
There was only one thing his aching head would let him think. Alec.
He rolled onto his side, to see Alec, his chest rising and falling heavily, eyes clenched shut. His hand was still gripping Magnus' wrist as if he was afraid of letting go.
"Alec."
He opened his eyes and looked at Magnus. The heart-wrenching relief he felt was spelt out on his face.
"You're so incredibly stupid."
Magnus smiled weakly. "Thank God I have you around then, right?"
"But when I'm not around," Alec said, his voice breathy but his tone chastising, "what are you going to do then?"
Magnus shrugged. "I guess I'll just have to have you around me all the time. Do you want to move in with me?"
Alec sat up, the fatigue that had shaken him vanished in an instant. "Really?"
"Of course."
He laughed, as if this wasn't an oddly timed request. As if their current circumstance was perfectly reasonable. As if they hadn't just almost died.
Magnus faltered - Alec hadn't actually said yes just yet, just laughed, and that could mean anything - but his proposal was answered, completely and utterly, when Alec leant down and kissed him.
Right there. In front of everyone. Despite the rain, the chill of damp clothes, the dirt, the noise. Alec kissed him, with all the sincerity he could muster, because of course he would. He would, he would, he would.
"Well… what do we do now?"
Simon turned to Jace. "Huh. I was just going to say that."
"Just because you don't suck completely doesn't mean I want to be all telepathic matchy-matchy with you, okay? Cut the 'thinking in unison' shit."
"Oh."
"And seriously. What do we do now?"
Simon shrugged. "We could wait for the rain to stop."
Another clap of thunder, louder than before, swept through the air. The rain itself seemed to pelt down harder, just to spite him. "Or not."
"Hey! Simon! Jace!" Isabelle was waving at them from the opposite bank. "You're going to have to swim!"
"Wait - what? No. No. Not at all. Not in a million years."
Jace smirked. "Come on, Simon. Let's see if you can redeem yourself after those pathetic chin ups."
"This is dangerous, and unsafe, and I'm… I'm not having it."
"Fine. Suit yourself."
Before Simon could convince him otherwise, Jace threw himself into the river. Unlike Magnus, he had made a torpedo shape and was swimming, so he was moving faster, but the current was beginning to pull him downstream. Simon looked up at Isabelle, who looked back with a pleading expression, so clear he didn't need his glasses to see it.
"Simon."
It was Clary who said it. Clary, who would never wish anything but good on him. Clary, who would fight for him until his death. Clary, who was now looking at him, with all of the earnest truth she could hold in her gaze, and asking him to swim across.
Clary would never let me get hurt.
And with that, he threw himself in too.
His entrance into the water wasn't as smooth as Jace's, but that proved to be to his advantage, seeing as the friction between his feet and the rocks kept him anchored upstream. Jace was still floating downstream. If Simon was to continue as he was, he'd make it to the other side. But would Jace? He looked up and, amongst the dirty water crashing against his face, he saw Clary looking concerned. Not for his safety, but for Jace's.
And so, against his better judgement, Simon picked his feet off the bottom of the river.
The surge of the current swept him quickly downstream, close enough to where Jace was still paddling futilely. He wrapped an arm around Jace's ankle, and found his footing again. This was a conundrum that couldn't be solved through strength, but instead, through physics.
If Simon hadn't been on the brink of further ruining Jace's and his lives, he would have taken a moment to smirk.
With his arm still tightly coiled around Jace's leg, he turned them so Jace was parallel to the flow of the river. Despite Jace's kicking and attempting to free himself, Simon's grip remained secure. Now that the surface area going against the force of the water was less, Simon pushed himself off the rocks at the bottom of the river, using the friction between it and his shoes to haul them both upstream. Jace had stopped kicking, but Simon was somewhat certain he was still conscious.
He got to the bank, and finally, Jace rolled himself onto the dirt shore. They took a moment to catch their breath, lying side by side in the dirt.
Simon waited for Jace to congratulate him on his application of science, but all he did was glance at Magnus and Alec and say, "If you try and kiss me right now, I will punch you in the - "
"Simon! You did it!" Clary bundled him up in a hug, smiling brightly.
"What did he do that I didn't do?" Jace asked.
"Use his head," she said, smiling. Before Jace could reply, she raised her eyebrows. "I know you think it's unfair when he gets praise and you don't but you have to understand that he just saved your life, so…"
"In his defence, if he hadn't have gone in first, I wouldn't have either. He does get some credit. For… you know. Bravery."
Both Clary and Jace looked at him as if he had just confessed to murder. Jace coughed. "Wait… did Simon Lewis just compliment me?"
"I don't know. Did Jace Herondale just refer to me by my actual name?"
"Touché."
Isabelle walked over. "Are these two fighting again?"
Clary shook her head slowly, looking confused. "No… they're just… passive-aggressively… complimenting each other, I think."
Simon ignored her comment and got to his feet. "Thank God you guys are okay."
Clary hugged him. "We were more worried about you - I mean… if you guys had gotten lost, or had… drowned…"
He squeezed her tightly. "We're okay. We're all okay."
She breathed a sigh of relief, sinking into him slightly. "That's good. That's all I care about right now."
She leant back. "Wait - where are your glasses?"
He shook his head. "No idea. I think they got lost in the river. Don't worry - I, uh… have a spare pair in my bag."
"Oh. Which ones?"
"They're… uh… new. In a way."
She smiled. "Something tells me this is going to be entertaining."
Before he could respond, Izzy tapped Clary on the shoulder and whispered something in her ear. She nodded knowingly and winked at Simon, leaving the two of them to be. Izzy smiled.
"All of the training in the world can't beat physics, huh?"
Simon shrugged. "What can I say?"
They stood in happy silence for a second, before something in Simon clicked. Something in him that had been afraid that he didn't care as much about Isabelle as he should. And so he looked her in the eye (or at least, as close to her eyes as possible - his vision was a little off), and said, "Actually, I know what I can say. Isabelle Lightwood, you're a wonderful person, and I know your ankle still hurts but you ran to the river anyway. I saw you. I've been pretty selfish these past few days, and you haven't been anything but kind to me, but for some reason I doubted that. I haven't appreciated anything that you, or anyone else, has done to make things easier for me. God. I'm sorry."
"You're not selfish, Simon," she whispered.
"I am. Or at least, I can be. When I'm afraid."
"You shouldn't be afraid. You're with us. You're with me."
"I know," he breathed. You're with me. He couldn't see her well, but he could hear her, smell her, feel her warmth from where he stood. "I'm with you."
There were times when Simon could be socially awkward. He had never been good at reading body language, or noticing social cues. But in that one moment, he didn't even need to see to know exactly what to do.
It didn't matter who leant in first. It didn't matter who wrapped their arms around the other one first. All that matter was them, there, seeing without vision, and kissing like they were afraid of never seeing each other again.
Clary sat down next to Jace. Jace rolled his eyes. "Well, alright then."
"What?"
Jace smiled. "What? You aren't looking to join in the make-out fest?"
She shoved him playfully. "Not yet. We have to talk first."
"Oh God."
"Don't worry. You don't have to say much." She took a deep breath and turned her whole body to face him. "Jace… I don't know if you guys talked about this while you were… you know… here, but you… Wait. Let me start that again. You're not selfish."
"Don't be ridiculous."
"I'm not. You're not selfish. Self-obsessed, maybe a little. Narcissistic, sometimes. But not selfish. Because a selfish person wouldn't throw themselves into a river to get to their loved ones. A selfish person, no matter how stupid, would never go to the extremes that you're willing to go to for people you care about. So, maybe Simon isn't always the dork you want him to be, and maybe, the close proximity to him for so long is freaking you out. No one can do anything about the fact that you two don't always get along. But most importantly, you can't think that your minor flaws will ever get in the way of others caring about you."
She paused, looking for some indication that she should continue. Jace was frozen. He hadn't told Clary any of these sorts of things. She had just known. He gulped. "Clary - can I ask you something?"
"Anything."
"Why did it take so long for you guys to get here?"
"Magnus tracked you, but his magic was weak and it drained him. He slipped into this sort of magic-coma. When he woke up, it was night time. And today, we got here as quick as we could."
Jace, eyes downcast, mumbled something she couldn't make out.
"What was that?"
"So you were looking for us."
"Of course we were."
"I just… I was just worried that you weren't. I was just worried that you didn't want us anyway."
Her expression was soft and sympathetic, and as stupid as Jace felt saying that out loud, she didn't seem to consider it invalid.
"Jace. Look at me. I would never abandon you. You could be the most flawed person to ever exist, but I would still fight until I got to be by your side. Everyone have flaws, but flaws don't forfeit the right to be loved. The need to be cared for."
"Not everyone has flaws."
"Oh yeah?" Clary nodded towards Magnus. "He's completely blind to danger when Alec is involved. Alec? He's afraid of letting everyone down. Izzy would die before she had to admit she needed help with anything. Simon is afraid of going out of his comfort zone, and he gets panicked, maybe even a little selfish, in his own self-interest when he does."
"And you?"
"Me? I have tonnes of flaws."
"Like?"
She looked at his exasperatedly like there was an obvious answer to that question. "You know. I… I don't know my limits. I think I'm capable of such great things but that's completely unrealistic."
"So what? You aim high. You take risks. You like a challenge. That doesn't sound like a flaw at all."
"Any flaws sound okay if you paint them well enough. I mean, you could argue that Magnus is just really in love with Alec. Alec just wants to be what everyone expects of him. Izzy is independent. Simon works best when he's comfortable. I'm a 'risk taker'."
"And me?"
"You're such an incredible person even you can't help falling in love with you."
He laughed, a short, honest laugh, before regaining his composure. "Not quite there yet, I'm afraid. A bit too cheesy."
She rolled her eyes. "Ha ha. Very funny. I'll work on it."
Miraculously, there were dry towels back at the camp. They had gotten soaked in the first night, but as they had been stored in tents, they had dried over time. Not all of their belongings survived the deluge - a bag containing camping supplies, such as a torch and a few other obscure items, was drenched with rain. The other belongings had been safely stowed in tents by the girls after Magnus had first run away, for fear of them being stolen or eaten by wild animals.
And speaking of wild animals.
"Neville!"
Even without his glasses, Simon could make out the furry little creature, still loyally guarding its new territory that was once Jace and Simon's tent. The exhilaration that their group had shared at finding each other quickly dissipated at the sight of Neville's squinty face.
"I thought it would have died by now," Alec whispered. Magnus narrowed his eyes.
"Maybe it's a demon."
"A demon? It's probably Lucifer himself."
The two chuckled to themselves, and went to get changed. Jace turned to Clary and Izzy, his face pleading.
"Come on. You two can get through to him. Just tell him to get rid of the rat."
The girls exchanged reluctant glances. Neither wanted to have to be the one to open Simon's eyes.
Finally, Izzy gave in, and with an impatient flick of her hair, she approached Simon.
"Hey, Si? Uh… where are you sleeping tonight?"
He looked at her funnily, trying to focus his eyes without glasses. "Um… with you guys?"
"Sorry to break it to you, but both you and Jace aren't going to fit in a tent with the two of us. Hell, even if we split the group in half, we'd struggle to fit in two tents. You need your tent back."
"We could sleep on the floor," Simon retorted defensively. Izzy shook her head sadly.
"It's too muddy."
"But - "
"This tent could be salvaged - with some elbow grease, of course. But it would mean - "
"Evicting Neville," Simon gulped. "I don't know if I can do that to him."
The understanding smile dropped from Izzy's face. "What do you mean, you don't know if you can do that to him? Simon, he shredded your tent and shat everywhere. I don't know much about renting houses, but any decent landlord would be pretty pissed off, don't you think?"
"You can't blame him - he's an animal."
"Exactly. He's an animal. He's not meant for tents. He's meant for the wild."
His physique sagged as he sighed, he was so dejected. But his reluctance meant one thing - Izzy had gotten through to him. Perhaps it had taken a near-death experience, but Simon was finally seeing things in perspective. Clary smiled. Good for him.
Simon knelt down, took a deep breath, and gently scooped Neville up. To him, Neville looked betrayed, devastated, begging for forgiveness. To everyone else, Neville just looked like he normally did - ugly. With a gulp, Simon shakily got to his feet, walked over to a nearby tree, and softly placed Neville down. The squirrel scrambled away without a second thought. Simon's dramatically pained expression disappeared. "Huh. I guess he didn't appreciate our bond as much as I did."
Izzy rolled her eyes. "Come on, Romeo. Don't mind Rosaline - you'll find yourself a Juliet one day. Now come and help me salvage this tent."
As Izzy set to work on the tent, Simon caught Clary's eye. She tried to smile reassuringly, but instead he looked at her with wide eyes. "But… Romeo and Juliet die…"
The boom of thunder made Jocelyn flinch. Luke glanced at her from the driver's seat, careful not to divert too much attention from the road. It was raining heavily, and he didn't fancy getting into a crash.
"You don't have to be so tense, Jocelyn."
She didn't pay him any heed, and began picking at her nails anxiously. Luke sighed. "Any sign of them?"
She looked out the window at the woods as they drove past. "Not yet."
An uneasy silence descended upon them before Jocelyn mumbled, "I'm so afraid for them, Luke."
"That's it."
He pulled the car over to the side of the road, where they could stop safely. He turned to her, his brow creased with worry. "Hey. Hey. Look at me."
Reluctantly, she did. He smiled reassuringly, but her pained expression stayed put.
"They're going to be okay."
"It's been three nights, Luke. Three nights. Anything could have happened."
"I know. But they have food. They have tents. They have supplies. And most importantly, they have each other."
"But what if they do something stupid?"
"Come on. Do you really think Clary would let them do something stupid?"
"You know her, Luke. If anyone paints it as enough of an adventure, she'll go along with it."
"Fine. What about Simon?"
"Simon? He'll do whatever Clary says."
"Alec, then. He may be a bit… prickly on the outside, but he's a good kid, and despite his disagreements with Clary and Simon, he'd never let harm come to them."
"But what about Jace? Isabelle? Magnus? They're all prone to irrational behaviour, and I'm just worried that - "
"Jocelyn. It'll be okay. You're worried about a few trained warriors and an immortal warlock getting hurt. They'll be okay. And do you remember what the police said? They said they were looking for them, but it may take them a while. So all we can do is hold on, okay? We just need to wait it out."
Jocelyn looked at him, her eyes glinting slightly with tears. "I know, Luke. But you can't sit there and tell me not to be afraid for their lives. They're kids. They're children. I know that they're warriors, and that they can handle themselves, but that doesn't mean it hurts any less that they're gone."
"I know," Luke admitted. "I'm afraid too."
She reached out and took his hand in hers, and was surprised to find that his was shaking slightly. He laughed nervously, flicking his eyes back to the road. The rain was pattering down on their roof, a tinny drumming sound that filled the gap left behind by their silence.
There was only so much that they could do.
And so, without another word spoken, Luke drove them back to the campgrounds as thunder pealed once more.
