While we camped out in the open plain, I couldn't help but pull out the worn deck of cards I carried in my pocket. I shuffled the deck in my hand as I stared into the fire that was built a few feet away. The sounds of some of the men coughing and snoring was all I could hear over the sounds of the crackling fire. Laying on my bedroll, I tried to think of better times. When I slept on feather downed pillows and soft beds. The feel of a woman next to him. Sighing, I readjusted my head on my saddle and closed my eyes.
"Ezra," came a woman's voice, "Ezra. Stop playing like you're asleep."
A playful swat to my bare chest made me break my expressionless features and turned it into a smile as I laughed. I lifted myself up a little to capture her lips before resting my head back down. Her fingers ran across my chest and I lifted one of my hands to play with her hair. My green eyes stared at the wavy locks that cascaded over her form before her head came to rest on my shoulder.
"Will you forget me?" she asked in an almost inaudible voice.
"Never."
"Promise?"
I opened my eyes and looked up into the night sky and silently named stars. Over a hundred times had I wished that I was in the arms of comfort. The war was over, yet I was tied to the fate of this group. The question of why I even signed up in the first place for the war had me staying up late most nights. Fear of the slaves who were seeking their freedom. Me being a southern boy with a southern accent. They would falsely associate me with probably owning slaves. I hadn't, but I knew people who had. Friends that I had known for years. Though I was never okay with what they were doing, I never spoke up about it. Then I witnessed my friend being killed by slaves who rebelled. It scared the hell out of me, and I feared I'd be next, but they only stepped over me and walked away. After that, I kept my distance from the half of the country that was now considered free. To join a fight to keep them in slavery was not exactly what I was fighting for. I didn't believe any man should own another, but after pretending for years that I did, probably wouldn't sit well with any ex-slave. So I fought with those who wanted slavery, only for the sake of staying alive. My mother thought it was dangerous to go into a war where few came out alive, but there were the perks of money and riches found along the way.
What we did today was not like that at all. They stole from those who barely had anything. Sure, my mother would win the shirt off the man she was playing against in a card game, but I wasn't like that. After that, all I could think about were the faces of those people and the cries of the baby and children. Instead of the comfort of a woman's touch, I had the guilt that suffocated me to fall asleep to.
Colonel Anderson took myself and Sergeant Darcy into his tent to go over what the plans were. Darcy, being the scrawny bastard he was, wanted to go in and kill them all off. I opted that we just reason with them, holding in my hope that they would flee before we got back.
"You know what your problem is, Standish." Sneered Darcy.
"If I wanted your opinion then I would've asked for it. Seeing how I haven't, please continue to keep your thoughts to your person." I said with a glare to the other man.
"We leave in a few days." Colonel Anderson said, getting our attention.
"What about giving them seven days?" I asked, frowning.
"They don't deserve even that." Huffed Darcy.
"If they're doing what they're told then there won't be a problem. If they're trying something, then we'll have to deal with it."
"'Deal with it'?"
The smile I got from Darcy was enough to know what he meant.
Stepping out of the colonel's tent Darcy gave him a crooked grin before walking away. I watched with disapproval before looking back to see the colonel drinking from the bottle I had seen earlier. He wondered if the pain in the man's leg had grown worse. The colonel never said anything, but there were clear signs of pain etched in his face. After making it a point to read people, I knew the man was slowly losing it, that and he was in a great deal of pain that he suppressed with whatever he was drinking.
