I journey back to Whiterun with Jarl Balgruuf. A combination of both not wanting to walk that far by myself, and wanting to save time. For the first few minutes, he simply stares at me, something in his gaze changed, thanks to my decision.
"Dragonborn… what you did back there…" he shakes his head in disbelief. "I doubt that a soul in Skyrim won't respect you for this. I'll make sure of it."
"Korina," I mutter. "My name is Korina."
Balgruuf nods, patting my arm with his hand lightly. "Of course, Korina. They'll know your name from Haafingar to Winterhold."
"Do you think any of them will feel guilty about it? About letting this war drag on so long they had to get a hero involved, one from legend and folklore, one that people doubted existed in the first place? Do you think that they'll ever learn that I didn't want this? Will they care?" I ask, eyes gazing off into the distance, but I'm looking at nothing. I only have this journey back to Whiterun to feel sorry for myself, I'll make damn good use of it.
"Dragonborn….." Balgruuf starts, then stops, sighing. "Does it matter? They'll be grateful to the hero who saved their lives, their homes, their children. Their world."
"And what of my life? My home? My world? It is all taken from me. Taken by a selfish Jarl who just wants to use me to further his claim on being Skyrim's High King. Taken because he saw an opportunity and he took it. Taken because….. Because he cares nothing for others." I slouch in my seat, the muscles in my shoulders and backs finally relaxing enough so that I can feel the weight of this.
Balgruuf says nothing, considering my words.
"Perhaps, in time, you will come to love him. If not love, then you may… appreciate him." he offers amicably, as if we are old friends. "It is not ideal, but… aren't the greatest heroes the unsung ones?"
He tries to crack a smile, but it falls off his face when he sees my still glum mood.
"No. I will be a hero that everyone knows, everyone can name and point to. They'll sing songs about me and my valor against Alduin, and they'll admire my bravery against the dragon menace. But they won't ever sing about how I gave my freedom so that the people of Nirn could live their lives, could have their children grow up before their eyes. Is that a fair trade-off, Balgruuf? I get to have my name go down in history as one of the greatest heroes ever, but my name will forever be linked with Ulfric, who hates half of my heritage, who despises the fact that he's not me, who is repulsed by magic in almost any form. I get nothing from this deal besides misery, while everyone around me gets so much more. Is that a fair point, Balgruuf? Do you actually believe that there is a single part of me that is happy about this? I will never come to love him, I will never come to appreciate him. I will never allow him to touch me, yet he will claim my title for his own gain, binding me to him for eternity and beyond." I drew in a shaky breath, tears stinging my eyes as reality sunk in, bit by bit.
"I have chains waiting for me, when I return from defeating Alduin. The rest of the world is freed from them." I close my eyes, trying to block everything else out.
Balgruuf opens his mouth to say something, but stops. Good. I don't want anything to touch me right now. Not people, not pity, not emotions.
I have a duty to save the world. Might as well do it.
"Are you sure this will work, Dragonborn?" a guard asks me, and I shrug, fixing my Glass armor boot.
"Hard to tell. It hasn't been used in, what, three, four Eras? Who can say?" I say, and smirk a bit when I see the guards around us shiver in fear.
Farengar approaches, clearing his throat to announce his presence. "Dragonborn, the trap is fully prepared for trapping the dragon. Additionally, would you mind if I performed a few experiments on the dragon, while it is trapped?"
I frown, standing up from my kneeling position. "I don't think that the dragon will be here for long enough. Arngeir said he would be likely to answer the call, but there's no telling if he'll even stick around long enough for the trap to work. And, once he lands and we do trap him, I imagine that he'll want to be gone as quickly as he can, even if it means flying me to Alduin's hideout."
"Besides, Farengar, if the dragon doesn't wish for you to do so, then you shouldn't. Dragons might be attacking, but that does not mean that they are evil and have no right to their person." I add, shaking my head at Farengar's disappointed look.
"But we could use it to devise a more efficient means to kill them!"
"Farengar, enough." Balgruuf joins the conversation. The court mage immediately halts, looking meekly at the ground and shrinking in on himself a bit. "You are here as a means of support to my guard, and to Irileth, and, of course, our friend here."
"Yes, Jarl Balgruuf." Farengar states, obeying the man who kept him fed and clothed.
Amazing what power can do.
"Well, Dragonborn? Do you think this will work?" Balgruuf crosses his arms over his chest, still hostile to this entire proposition.
"It has to. If it doesn't…." I don't need to finish my thought to him. He already heard my self-pitying rant on the journey back here.
He nods, understanding. "Whenever you're ready, summon the dragon. My guard will stand by you no matter what."
I nod, smiling a bit at him. He's been a helpful ally during this whole thing. I'm grateful.
I walk, steady yet slow, to the balcony of the Keep, and draw in a breath. Releasing it, I Shout out the three words, combined into a name. "ODAHVIING!"
For a few minutes, nothing happens. I'm about to try again, when a guard near Irileth and I stops, saying something along the lines of, "Do you hear that?"
Moments later he's carried off in the dragon's claws, released over the land and falling to his inevitable death.
"By Azura!" Irileth shouts out, and draws her sword, scanning the skies as the guards all do the same, drawing weapons and muttering curses, not wanting to be anywhere near next.
Calmly, I wait for Odahviing to present himself again, and make sure that he can see me. Quickly, I step back into the enclosed part of the keep, still in view of the skies and Odahviing himself.
He's supposed to be prideful….. But, then again, all dragons are.
I take a few more steps back, and Odahviing makes another circle around the keep before coming in to land on the balcony. He ignores Irileth's sharp stabs with her sword, merely brushing her off as casually as a fly, though he does so into a wall. She won't be very happy about that….
The guards all watch my apprehensively, scared to death of the dragon. I smirk, running backwards now, and Odahviing takes the bait, following me with ease, though not the previous grace he had in the air.
"Dovahkiin, you are a Mey to think you can face Alduin!" he says, and I merely back up more. Only a few more steps for him…
He chuckles, if a dragon can chuckle, and moves forward, opening his mouth to breath fire or frost….
When the trap comes down on him, and his throat is forcibly constricted, the contraption effectively paralyzing him. I have never been so glad to have guards around.
"What is this?" Odahviing cries out, finally understanding his predicament. "Dovahkiin!"
"Odahviing, I'm sorry that I had to do this. But I need to get to Alduin, and I do not know where he is hiding," I explain, a bit of desperation creeping into my voice.
"Hmm. You know, many of the Dov have been questioning Alduin's supremacy, his domination. If you defeat Alduin, it may be that the Dov will bow to the strength of your Thu'um," he thinks out loud. Is it weird for a dragon to look thoughtful? Because he is…
"What are you not telling me, Odahviing?" I ask, the nagging feeling that there's a catch creeping up on me.
"Alduin is at Skuldafn, high in the mountains of Keizaal. You will never reach it, Dovahkiin, without the wings of a Dov. You may have the Thu'um and the Sil of a Dov, but you are not one of us," Odahviing replies smugly.
I grit my teeth, letting out a huff of hot air. Dragons. "You could take me there, though."
Odahviing seems surprised that I would suggest such a thing. "His lair is filled with protection. You will not reach him alive. If you bow to his Thu'um now, he may spare you for the next world."
"I will never bow to him." I shake my head. "But, Odahviing, you forget. Only my word prevents all these guards, all these people, who Alduin thinks beneath him, and beneath all the Dov, from killing you. You are helpless. Recognize the strength of my Thu'um, and take me to Skuldafn. After I am safely delivered there, you will be free to go and serve whomever you choose, be it myself, Alduin, or no one but your own desires. I give you my word."
Odahviing draws his head back, as little as he can, and considers the offer. My eyes glance around the room, though I don't turn from Odahviing for a moment.
In the corner of my eyes, I see Farengar, looking more excited than ever, Irileth focusing solely on my exchange with the dragon, and all the guards staring at us, fingers gripping their weapons tightly.
Odahviing calls my attention to his winged self again. "Very well, Dovahkiin. Part of the reason I came to your call was to see if your Thu'um was stronger than the World-Eater's. I no longer serve him, but instead, you. Your Voice is as strong as his, if not stronger. Zol mul. I will fly you to Skuldafn, safely."
I nod, after a moment. Dragons do not lie- and I can feel Odahviing's truth in my Sil.
"Release him." I call out, not turning from Odahviing.
"What?!" Irileth, for one, asks, startled beyond measure.
"You heard me. Release him."
The guards hesitate, the ones at the levers to raise the trap.
I whip my head around to them, glaring, and they gulp. "Do it."
They obey, finally.
Ironically, the Dov seem to follow my voice more than mortals.
Odahviing stretches as the trap is released- it must have been painful. "Ah, freedom!"
"Now, Dovahkiin, Bo with me. Let your Sil know what it is missing, as a Joor." Odahviing turns around as he talks, the guards scattering like snowflakes in a strong wind.
"Dragonborn, are you sure this is a good idea?" Balgruuf asks me, standing off to the side, somewhat behind Irileth, whose eyes have not left Odahviing.
Hey, even dragon's tails are dangerous.
"No, but what about this entire plan was a good idea?" I respond, checking my armor and weapons for any flaws that I could see. I doubt that I can duck back into town for supplies once I fly off on Odahviing. This is the end stretch.
The people outside with me all watch, as I approach Odahviing, the red-scaled dragon eager to be in the sky once more, where he belongs. I hesitate just a moment before climbing on his back, fiddling with my new sword that has yet to be tested. I should've brought my other one, but… I couldn't. I don't know why. Maybe because it feels like the strength of the legion is with me? Or at least my commander's.
Maybe it's because it reminds me of the weight that will come with this outcome. I have all the lives in the world hanging on my shoulders. I doubt that that weight will clear up when this is over, though.
Just a feeling.
Skuldafn is immense, sprawling, and- from just a quick peek at it on Odahviing, high in the air- well protected.
"This won't be easy, will it?" I ask the red dragon, who shakes his head.
"No, Dovahkiin. That would defeat the purpose of Alduin hiding his lair, even if he is behaving like a Nikriin. A coward," Odahviing answers, and I square my shoulders.
"Thank you, Odahviing, for helping me here. Even if I don't survive, and Alduin wins…. I wish you the best of luck." I turn, facing him, and he considers this, before nodding once.
"And to you, Dovahkiin. You will triumph. Your Thu'um is zol mul, stronger than Alduin's. You will return from Sovngarde with his head." He takes off before I can respond, confusion written across my features.
I shake it off, turning to the sentinels guarding Alduin's hide away. Time to save the world.
The Draugr are easily dispatched, though annoying, but the dragons are the problem. I don't truly want to kill them, as I believe that they might be simply under Alduin's sway… But they are attacking me.
I duck behind a pillar as one breathes fire at me, and I hold my breath, terrified. This is, without a doubt, the most dangerous thing I have ever done. And I have no choice at this point. No choice, no help, no way but to push through.
And these things are in the way of that objective.
As soon as the dragon stops his assault, out of breath apparently, I dash out, firing an Ice spell at it, Wall of Frost, with my left hand, while my right swings the sword at it's neck, hacking away at the scales as fast as I can, with as much power as I can muster.
He snaps at me, but I dodge, feeling the heat from it's recent Thu'um projection emanate from it's body. The Voice tends to do that. Whenever I use Unrelenting Force, I'm more likely to be aggressive in battle, and with Whirlwind Sprint, I'm more likely to run from it. They have a lingering effect, surprisingly enough.
The dragon catches my spell arm, though, teeth digging in and scraping as I slip away before it's a solid grip and he can throw me around like a ragdoll. I barely feel it; the battle is taking up too much of my attention.
I slip back behind the pillar again as he fires up another Shout, and breathes ice, this time, at me.
It catches my injured arm, making me hiss in pain as it throbs unhelpfully. It can still do magic- but it won't be pleasant. He tore into my muscle fairly deep, even with a light scrape. I sheathe my sword, inspecting the damage with my uninjured hand.
He stops the Shout, and I whip around, Shouting myself, "Yol!"
It startles him, at least a little bit, but only for a moment, baring his fangs and preparing to bite my form once more.
I don't give him the chance, instead sending a Lightning Strike his way, and another, and another, rapidly casting them with both hands. A few more hits….
They all land, the dragon unable to stop them or get away. Giving a cry, he surges up, as if to escape the onslaught, but falters, slamming back down into the ground and sending stone fragments flying into the air. I'm far enough away that none hit me, but there's still a reflex flinch that goes through me at that sound.
The familiar process of consuming the soul of the dragon happens, the bones the only remainder of his life besides the knowledge that now resides in me.
I know there are other dragons here. Maybe this will prove to them that I am no idle threat.
And perhaps it will prove to them that they should join me, instead of following Alduin.
I dislike such violence that could be avoided.
Despite the wishes of the Nords, I don't want the dragons to die. I just want them to settle down.
With a leader like Alduin, how can they?
But if I was leading them….
Zol mul. I must prove it.
The last few dregs of the mortal world drain away, and my eyes behold the wonder that is Sovngarde.
For a few moments, I'm stunned by the mere beauty and sheer amazement that I'm here, yet not dead.
Come to think of it, why didn't I just die and come here, once I learned Dragonrend? Wouldn't that have been simpler?
But the thoughts passes, and I glance around, seeing a great veil of mist. With a distracted spell in one hand, I heal my wounds from my fight with Nahkriin, the dragon priest who guarded the portal. He was a bit much, especially on my own. But I got here, and a good bit of loot from the temple. Why not take it, since this place is inaccessible to mortals, besides myself?
My wounds heal, and I end the spell, trudging forward with a determination, but a certain… reluctance. If I died here, yes, the world would be doomed, but…. I wouldn't be trapped. Just dead.
There's a certain beauty in that.
(A/N: I know she's having a self pity moment kinda throughout this chapter, but you'd do the same.)
