Thirty: Agitation
Characters: Doopliss, Count Bleck/Blumiere, Tippi/Timpani

"Timpani, my love!" the blue-skinned man onscreen called, a hand held out towards his human girlfriend. "Why do you run from me? Why?"

She turned, bright tears falling freely. "Blumiere, please! This cannot continue!"

Close enough now, he put a hand on her shoulder, only to draw it away when she flinched. "T-Timpani… What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, truly…" She shook her head. "Just a little sunburn is all…"

He snorted. "Do you really think I would be fooled?" He gently clasped her hands in his. "Please… You know you can tell me anything."

Hesitating, she pulled up her sleeves, revealing crisscrossing slash wounds going all the way up her arms. Blumiere gasped.

So did a bed sheet wearing a fancy bowtie and a party hat. Well, he wasn't a bed sheet really (he had shoes, too), but he sure looked like one. "Oh man…" he murmured, leaning forward in his plushy seat, eyes glued to the scene on his TV screen. As the drama continued, he shoveled a handful of cheese puffs into his cut-out mouth.

"Who has done this to you?" Blumiere growled, amber eyes darkening to crimson. He went to wipe away her tears, but she turned aside her head.

"Blumiere… We… We shouldn't see each other anymore," the beautiful human girl choked out painfully.

"What?!" the sheet exclaimed, banging his invisible fist on the arm of his Laz-E-Boy. "No, no! You guys had better not break up!"

Blumiere definitely shared his sentiments. "What…? Timpani, why would you think that?" Seeing that she was scared, he reached for her to comfort her, but she moved away once again. "Timpani, my love… Please… Tell me how this happened. Who did this?"

Trembling, she slowly turned towards him. "Oh, Blumiere… It was…"

"Yes…!" The bed sheet leaned forward, spooky red eyes widening in excitement.

"It was your-" KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

"What!" the sheet screamed, accidentally knocking over his bowl of cheese puffs and getting them all over the floor. Blumiere wrapped his arms around her, bearing a rare expression of fury. He'd missed what she said.

Suddenly, the music took a dramatic turn, and an ominous shadow appeared onscreen. As the character did not show himself, it was up to the dialogue to reveal them. It was unfortunate that everything was drowned out by the resumption of the annoying knocking. Whoever was at the door didn't stop at three this time, and instead opted to produce ceaseless noise.

Desperately turning up the volume on the TV, he still couldn't hear what anyone was saying. Ok, now it was definitely more than one person banging away at the steeple door. Despite being in the bell tower and as far from the front door as possible, he still heard someone clearly yelling, "Hey, you, weird ghost thing! We wanna talk to you! And don't pretend you're not there because we can hear you watching TV up there!"

The ghost put his head in his hands, trying not to shriek in frustration. "For crying out loud! Why can't I ever get any peace around here!" Getting out of his all-too-comfortable chair, he stomped downstairs to answer the door.

"What! What'd ya want!" he growled, flinging the door open. In front of him stood two mopey-looking villagers, one of which he knew to be the mayor. "Oh, you again. Make it snappy cause I'm missin' my show!"

The mayor coughed and ignored his glare. "Ahem, yes, Mr. …ah-"

"How many times do I haffta tell ya, slick? I don't like anybody knowin' my name, understand?"

"Very well. We're here on the matter of your overdue rent."

"Not payin' that."

"As well as your water bill-"

"Not payin' that either."

"And your cable bill, too."

"Oh ho ho ho, definitely not payin' that!"

"Well, you're gonna have to pay something, mister!" the guy next to the mayor chimed in.

"Look, slicks. We've been over this. What kind of idiot expects a ghost to pay rent? What about the hundreds of boos that live here, huh? You gonna charge them, too?" He leaned against the doorframe, smirking smugly.

"Well, no, but-"

"Then why ya tryin' to put it all on me, huh, slick? I may not look it, but I'm a ghost too, and technically me movin' in here counts as a haunting." He glanced up at his bell tower, suddenly remembering that he was missing his show and didn't have time to mess with these mooks. "I'm sick of being bothered, so don't come back. Or else!" With that, he slammed the door and turned to leave.

But then, like the idiots they were, the duo started gossiping about him almost as soon as the latch clicked shut.

"Sir, you sure we should keep bugging this guy?" the other guy muttered.

"Of course. The steeple is Twilight Town property. If you move in, you have to pay your dues."

"I don't know… That guy doesn't seem like someone you should mess with. Plus, he does kind of have a point."

"Nonsense. He looks harmless. Besides, I can't let him slide. If I do, everyone else will want to as well, and it's hard enough to get people to care about payments as it is. If we come back every day, I'm sure he'll crack…"

"If you say so…"

Their voices faded away as they went down the path. The ghost's sheet would have turned a flaming red in anger if that was at all possible. Grouchily stomping back up the stairs, he muttered to himself, "Oooh, those guys really get my goat… Why, I oughta…"

Suddenly, he froze in shock. On the screen, credits were rolling. He'd missed the whole gosh dang show!

"Alright, that's it! If you make me miss my soaps, then I'll just have to make my own!" He looked around the room, cooking up a plan for a curse. His eyes landed on the bell high above his head, then the red star-shaped crystal he'd found here recently.

"Oh ho ho ho… This is gonna be good…" he said to himself, Jack-O-Lantern mouth stretching into a large, devious grin, his red eyes glowing evilly with a sudden sinister power.