Her lifeless eyes stared up at Will. And just as it had taken a moment to process impaling her on his seraph blade, he realized that her eyes were looking at him. Though they remained pale gray and damaged, much like Jem's, their dark pupils bore into his own eyes with far too much precision for a blind person. His stomach clenched as he realized whatever spell she'd been under had managed to restore her eyesight.
The first time she looked at him he'd glared at her with anger before driving a knife into her body.
He removed his hands from her stomach, and couldn't look away from the crimson stain now covering them. Her blood. Quickly, he tried to rub it off on his torn gear, but his efforts were futile.
He could hear the battle raging on around him, and he took one last look at the dead girl he'd grown to care about before he rose to his feet and joined the battle.
An automaton cut across his path, but Will's blade had already severed the machine's head. The next automaton faced the same fate. And the next. And the next. When he felled ten machines, his eyes drifted towards the carriages, where a wounded Jessamine fell to her knees under the blows of a large automaton. Just like his brethren, he too fell to Will's swift movements and cuts. He crouched near Jessamine and pulled her on her back to get a look at her wounds. He had to stop himself from gasping, and instead only closed his eyes briefly.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
"Hush, Jessie," Will said gently. "This was not your fault."
"I have acted like a spoiled little girl, yelled at Sophie, and said terrible things to Charlotte and Tessa. I've betrayed my family…" Her breathing was shallow, and he knew she didn't have much time left.
"You did well today," he said.
"Mortmain is in Idris, your Idris," Jessie said quickly. "That's where he's taking… and the other...Oh, Will." And she died there in Will's arms.
He sack back on his heels then, and wallowed in the feeling of helplessness growing in his chest.
Rising again, he looked around the Institute grounds and saw that the battle was over. Broken machines littered the grounds, and he could see the other Shadowhunters of the Institute either walking around or tending to the injured. Except-
Jem
His head whirled around until he spotted Jem walking back through the open gates of the Institute, covered in blood. He ran then, to his friend, and managed to catch Jem before he collapsed on the ground.
His body heaved with heavy breathing, and Will's eyes widened as he realized how tired Jem looked.
"They have her," he gasped. "They took Tessa." And then his body sagged as Jem fell into unconscious sleep.
My eyes opened slowly, which confused me, as I expected the afterlife to be less corporeal and more spiritual. But the discomfort in my limbs and the sharp chill in the air tell me I had not died on the front lawn of the Institute.
My body, though a little stiff, moved much more gracefully than before my supposed death, and this seemed odd. The next thing I noticed was that I could still see. While under the control of the spell, I had thought the eyesight was just a temporary side effect, and when I broke free of that control and looked up into Will Herondale's eyes, I considered it my last gift. But now, my eyes blinked once, then twice, and the sight of a rocky ceiling held strong.
Sitting up, I immediately noticed a third thing. This was not my body. Having lived in it for months (and potentially years as I couldn't remember that far back) I had gotten used to the feeling and shape of it. But now, with my hands splayed in front of me, I couldn't recognize myself. Pale, long fingers. Equally white arms. There was nothing of the drug in my features, as if Mortmain's imprisonment had never happened. And even before I'd been subjected to his torture, my skin took on a more tan color as the Inn near the docks had been bathed in sunlight often.
The clothes I wore were just as unfamiliar. The gown I had been wearing, drenched in my blood was gone, replaced by black clothing resembling the Shadowhunter gear.
"I see you've awakened, my dear," a cool voice said.
I spun around to see Axel Mortmain standing at the entrance to the cave I resided in. He looked just as vile as I remembered him. "Where am I?" I snarnled.
Mortmain chose to ignore my question and strolled through the doorway and approached me with two automatons flanking him. His demeanor looked as if he were greeting an old friend, and he opened his arms out as if expecting a gracious greeting. "You've returned home."
A retort flooded my tongue, and I was about to fire back with an equally preposterous comeback, but it died on my lips just as quickly as it had come. I did not know where home was. For the past few days, home had been the Institute. And before that, the prison and the Inn. Did he mean one of those places? My body tensed as I thought back to that cold, dark cave. And the demon that had fed me the poison.
"Not the Dark Sister's house, I assure you," he said calmly, as if reading my thoughts. "Haven't you ever wondered why it was you that I sent Mr. Gray after? Did your curious case of amnesia seem at all inconvenient?" He drew closer to me as he spoke, and when his hand brushed against my shoulder, I shuddered.
"No," I whispered as realization dawned on me.
He smirked. "Yes. You were under my control since the beginning. I fashioned Ms. Gray as my salvation, but you were my sword I'd use to cut down my enemies."
My heart dropped into my stomach as I thought of Will's eyes swimming with hatred. I remember hearing Charlotte's cries for her husband and Jem's ghostly figure. I had only caused trouble for the Shadowhunters of the Institute. And all the while, Mortmain had some sort of roll in this. I had previously only considered myself as a symbol to the Shadowhunters, that Mortmain was cutting off Jem's access to the yin fen as a way to swade their morals. But now…
"You created me?" I asked. "And Tessa?"
"She was an experiment of mine, combining Shadowhunter and demon blood to create an entirely new breed. But you were a dream of mine, ever since my parents were murdered." His eyes narrowed then. "I sought revenge against the Shadowhunters, and with your help, I made progress on that plan. But how could a mere mortal bring an entire race of half-angels to their knees? The answer came to me easily: you take them down from the inside."
My hands balled into fists at my side and a growl threatened to spill from my lips. "Isn't that why you manipulated Mr. Gray? What more could I do?" I spat out. Whatever fear I held before burned into a fiery inferno.
Mortmain had the audacity to chuckle. "Nathaniel Gray was only a pawn in my scheme. I needed a way to get information, and his relationship with Ms. Lovelace proved very useful. But information alone would not be enough to stop the Shadowhunters. Not when there were people like William Herondale in the enclave. I needed more."
"What did you do?"
"At first, I intended for Ms. Gray to charm Mr. Herondale, but after I heard about her engagement to Mr. Carstairs, I altered my plans. You would be the one to bring Mr. Herondale to his knees. If I altered your memories, and presented you as a young, attractive woman afflicted with the same disease as his parabatai, well…" He trailed off, but the smirk never left his face.
I looked at my feet, clothed in black, and completely unfamiliar. A question formed in my mind as my mind jumped to a hundred different conclusions, none of them good. "What am I?"
"You grew up in a small town outside of London with your parents and your younger sister. As far as I know, you were a mundane-"
"Were?" The fire in my chest died down into smoldering embers as a chill swept across my body. "I am not anymore?"
"Warlock magic is a curious thing," Mortmain continued. "With the Dark Sister's help, I managed to separate your soul from your body and place you in another's."
My eyes drifted down to my arms and trailed along the pale skin and lanky appendages. "Whose body is this?" I asked.
Mortmain regarded me with a cool indifference, as if the body I was currently inhabiting seemed like trivial information at best. "What does it matter now? It belongs to you now."
"How can you say that?" I gasped. "How could a person be so vile and self-centered?"
"My thoughts and actions shouldn't come as a surprise to you, my dear. From what I have just told you, the answer should be clear. I was not born evil, but forged by the ashes of my parents and by the hands of the Shadowhunters. And after the battle today, their morals should be flickering out. I should thank you for bringing the mightiest angels to their knees."
Rooted to the spot, I watched as Mortmain regarded me for a brief second before striding out the door, followed closely by his automaton guards.
Before he vanished from sight, I called out, "What was my name?"
I expected him to continue walking away, but he stopped mid-step and looked back at me. "Natalie Adair Wells." And then he was gone, and I was alone.
Will leaned back in the chair and watched Jem's chest rise and fall with every shaky breath he drew. Even after years of living with him, it still hurt Will to see his brother in such a state. After Jem had run back to the Institute and shouted that the Dark Sisters had Tessa, he'd fallen into an unconscious sleep. Magnus assured Will that Jem was stable, but even Magnus couldn't hide the truth from Will. Jem was dying.
Of course, Jem had always been dying, but Will always played it off as something he would deal with later. Jem's prospects were looking good, and after his engagement with Tessa, Will was certain he'd never seen his friend more happy. And Will had been willing to give up his feelings for Tessa if it meant Jem was happy. But Mortmain's strive for power would not be stopped so Jem and Tessa could get married. Instead, he sent her to them and threw all of their plans out of order. In the span of a few days, she had shaken Will to his very core and had managed to worm her way into almost everyone's hearts. Even Gabriel cared, not that he would let anyone, especially Will, know.
He thought back to their time in the library. He'd been looking to escape training with the Lightwoods, and found himself watching her sit amongst the books with nothing to do but stroke them. She looked so sad and defeated, and Will started to feel something, something that had been growing since their first night together. The night where they talked about Jem. And in the library he once again felt himself opening up to her about himself. He'd only ever told Magnus and Tessa about his curse. Perhaps she was the representation of his two loves; Her body held a representation of Jem while her mind reminded him so much of Tessa.
But when she opened her eyes to him, and he'd seen the white irises and scarred pupils, he knew she was someone entirely different. Someone who'd suffered under Mortmain's reign just as much as they had.
So when he'd seen her wielding that knife and attacking his fellow brethren, his mind could not process what his eyes were telling him. He acted on instinct then, and his sword swung of its own accord, and the way she parried his attacks told him that she was no friend of theirs.
"Who are you?" he had snarled at her, pushing as much venom into his voice as possible.
But she had not been a spy, not an intentional one, at least, for when he'd ultimately delivered the final blow, she did not struggle.
"Thank God," she'd said, and collapsed into his arms.
He'd cried then, because, in a way, the curse had come back. To love is to destroy, and seeing her there, lying dead in his arms, eyes staring up at him… it had its effect on him. Months after he'd come to grips about Tessa's true feelings, he was once again shattered. And the one person he wished to talk to was dying.
After Jessie died, and they'd brought Jem in with the other injured, Will had gone back to look for her body. He had been the one to bring her down, the very least he could do for her was bury properly, perhaps near Thomas and Agatha. But when he stepped out of the Institute's doors, the courtyard was empty of all evidence of the previous battle. All the automatons had vanished along with her body.
Will knew he had to do something for the anger within him threatened to burst out. He needed to go after Mortmain and return Tessa to his brother. To avenge her death.
But, as he looked down at Jem, he knew he wouldn't be able to leave his bedside. With Jem's life hanging in the balance, there was no telling when Jem would breathe his last breath. Perhaps he had days left. Maybe only hours. No matter the time, Will knew he wouldn't-couldn't- leave. And it began to eat away at him.
He leaned forward and brought his legs to his chest as a few silent sobs wracked his body.
"Go," a soft voice croaked.
Pulled away from his pitiful cries, Will sprang from his chair and knelt at Jem's head. Though his eyes remained closed, Will could tell Jem was very much awake.
"You need to rest," he said softly.
At this, Jem opened his eyes, though only a bit, and considered Will. "Go after him, William. Bring Tess back."
Will shook his head. "I will not leave you."
"I was not asking, Will. The only thing you can do for me is to ensure the safety of my fiance."
The door to Jem's room opened, and Magnus walked in. He didn't seem surprised to see Jem awake, but he did raise an eyebrow at Will's form hovering over Jem.
"You're still here?" he asked. "I expected you to be gone by now."
"What is it with you bloody people wanting me gone," Will spat. "We don't even know where he's taken her, they could be…" But Will broke off as he remembered. "Jessie said they were in Idris."
Magnus snorted. "And you believe the word of a proven traitor?"
"No, Jessie may have betrayed us once, but she wouldn't lie now. Not after Nathaniel's death. She knew, and she said Idris. But… there was something else. She said it was my Idris," Will said.
"Do you happen to own a plot of land?" Magnus drawled.
"Will," Jem breathed. "Home."
And Will understood Jessamine's words then. Mortmain had taken Tessa to the one place Will would never consider. "Cadair Idris."
"Go home, Will," Jem said.
Will looked into Jem's tired eyes, and he knew he couldn't refuse Jem's wish. And though he knew this was probably the last time he would probably see Jem's eyes, he could not bear say those words he'd been preparing to say for five years.
Instead, he nodded his head and charged out of the room, hoping and praying that Jem would somehow manage to live long enough to say goodbye to Tessa.
When Will had left the room, Magnus turned back to Jem's bedside.
"You did not just come to convince Will to leave," Jem observed.
Magnus sat down in Will's vacated chair and shook his head. "Quite right," he said.
"How are the others," Jem asked.
"Gideon was lucky, the cut was shallow. Mr. Branwell, on the other hand will most likely never walk again."
Jem took the news with a calm manner, nodding his head as if the news were of a paper cut Henry had received in his workshop. But, Magnus guessed, Jem was considering the positive side of the situation.
"There is something you are not telling me," Jem stated.
Right again, Magnus thought. "Mrs. Branwell had called me in earlier today to help stabilize your little refugee's condition. Charlotte had been very cryptic about the situation, so I was shocked to find another like you. Like you, I tried my best to keep her alive, but I discovered something odd…"
"And?" Jem pressed.
"Needless to say, when her conditioned improved, I left to get a consultation, if you will. However, when I returned and found you all in conditions worse for wear, my suspicions were confirmed. Your guest was not who she appeared to be," Magnus said. He was standing then, not really finding any comfort telling Jem while remaining still.
"You believe she is a traitor?" Jem asked, voice rising just a bit.
Magnus shook his head. "I do not have to think. From Ms. Collin's testimony, she has proven herself to be a traitor, an unfortunate pattern this Institute is consistently following, I might add. According to her, your guest attacked Gideon Lightwood before confronting Will in battle."
"This cannot be right," Jem whispered.
"To the Enclave, proof is proof. I have lived long enough to know that Shadowhunter rarely believe things they cannot see, but Ms. Collin's words would be enough to warrant their interest. They are already out for Mortmain's blood. She could very well be caught in the crossfire."
Jem took a shaky breath as he tried to sort through his racing mind. In the center of it all, his mind thought to Will. Had he known about her?
"Thank you for telling me, Magnus," Jem said once his mind had quieted down. "I suggest you give this information to Charlotte."
Magnus seemed to consider Jem's words, but stood nonetheless. "I shall leave you to your rest."
Jem seemed to consider something, then, and Magnus paused in his tracks. "Could you also tell Charlotte something for me?"
Confused, Magnus nodded.
"Tell her I request an audience with a member of the Silent Brothers."
