Don't Wait For Me
"None of those other logs were what I really wanted to say to you, Tali, I -" Shepard's image looked down at the desk where he sat, clearly trying to think about what he wanted to say. He wore his usual puffy orange jacket, his hair was close cut, and if Tali strained, she could almost smell that specific scent of his shampoo. It was weird; The things one remembers are never the things one wants to remember most.
She had been both surprised and excited that the last drive was a video file instead of strictly audio, but the instant she'd seen his face, instead of having to rely on only memory... It had devastated her. For a full minute she had had to pause the video, just staring at him. Memorizing his every feature like she had done so many times before. When she thought she had finally gotten control of herself again, she tentatively pressed play.
"Heh, to be honest I didn't actually know EDI was recording all of that. Sly girl that you are." Shepard's words only got one response from the quirky AI: a thumbs up on his monitor. "It did have an unintended side effect, though. I think I narrowed down what I needed you to hear." He paused, staring straight into the camera for a moment as though he could see her very soul.
"I love you, Tali Zorah Vas Normandy. I have loved you since I first laid eyes on you back in that dingy little citadel alleyway. Some days, you're all that keeps me going. But the dangers we face now, with the Reapers out there... Well, there's a good chance I won't make it through to the end."
"No, no don't you say it." Tali's voice was quiet, but she knew if she heard him say the words she might lose the hope she'd been holding on to for so long. It would be the nail in the coffin.
Shepard looked down at the desk again, running both hands over his face as he contemplated his next words. His hands steepled over his mouth and nose for a moment, and his eyes searched the room as if he might find the answers written on the wall. He finally sighed, letting his hands fall back onto the desk.
"Tali, you are the strongest, smartest, most courageous woman I know. Frankly that's what worries me the most. If I die, Tali... Please. Mourn me, but don't let it destroy you."
In that instant, she felt her muscles slowly go numb in her face. She sat staring blankly at Shepard's image as though she were hypnotized. She closed her eyes, unwilling to see the world around her any longer. When she heard him chuckle, she dared to open them again, only to see that half cocked smile he always wore.
"Of course, I'd appreciate it if you made sure I was dead before you did all of that. I know i've lived through some pretty ridiculous stuff before so, can't hurt to include that I suppose." His nonchalant delivery of the most important thing she'd heard in months was dumbfounding, but after a brief moment of disbelief she sat up straighter in the chair. She felt her resolve returning ten fold. It was not only something she wanted, but a request from John. That made all the difference.
"In the end, know that I will always love you, no matter what happens after this shit-show of a war. No matter where you go, no matter what you decide to do, I'll be keeping an eye on you, Miss Vas Normandy. You can count on it." His wink and sultry tone got her heart rate up with thoughts of what she would do to him at that particular moment if he suddenly appeared beside her. She quickly did her best to dispel those thoughts, frustrating as they were, to focus on video. She refused to miss even a second.
"And one last thing, Tali. I asked Garrus to look out for you if i'm not around. So if you don't mind, at least try and cooperate with him? You two squabble like kids sometimes and you're stubborn as a mule when it comes to taking care of yourself." The chastising remark forced a choked up laugh out of her as she watched him look on lovingly.
"Be safe, my Love. I'll see you soon." That same mind crushingly abrasive 'click' of the video ending jolted her from her stupor. Tali leapt up out of her seat and snatched up all the thumbdrives that weren't already in her pocket before rushing out of the Captain's cabin without a backwards glance. She had a ship to fix and a captain to find. She would let nothing slow her down.
"I'll see you soon, John."
Hey guys! I know it's been a long time and I apologize. I could give you a plethora of excuses but That doesn't really justify my not finishing this story sooner. I'm aware it's an incredibly short chapter, but then, my Shepard was not a long winded man. His message would be short and to the point. I hope you all get some closure out of this, and be sure to check out my other stories if you haven't already!
- Yours in service, Bahoogasmif.
