Chapter 3

"I got it!" Lily announced proudly, entering the astronomy tower with a sense of pride that made her rare smile glow. Scorpius shot up from where he was leaning against a pillar, striding towards her with a mirrored smile of his own.

"Let's see it," Scorpius demanded, dimples on display. His hands came out of his pockets and grabbed the small baggy from Lily, then sniffed the contents. He made a face.

"I know. But it's all I could get last minute," Lily responded. "I thought you would be out with Rose tonight."

She stopped herself from scoffing, or perhaps throwing up. Everyone thought 'Scorose' was such a perfect couple, now going on 11 months together, and constantly at each other's side—except for nights like these, when Scorpius needed a break and smoked weed at the Astronomy Tower with Lily. She acknowledged the irony of the situation—unavailable golden boy, now head boy, drugs, and a secret hiding spot—the same secret hiding spot, actually. But this time it was different.

Because this time they were just friends.

"How was I supposed to know Rose was going to bail for studying?"

"Um, because she studies all the time?" Lily replied, rolling her eyes. Annoyance toward Rose absolutely seeped from her pores. Scorpius ignored it.

"Well, it is our NEWT year, so…" Scorpius shrugged.

"It's also only the third week of school," Lily pointed out.

They made their way over to the ledge, right where she and Philip used to sit. Sitting there with Scorpius should have reminded her of that dark time, but surprisingly, for some reason, it didn't. Seeing Scorpius' shining blue eyes under the moonlight, his dimpled smile, his plaid shirts he would offer her in the chill of night—it was different. It was better.

"Well, she wants to get ahead. She has this weird complex. She wants to be good enough," Scorpius muttered, licking the edge of the cigarillo.

Lily knew things about Rose. Mostly the basics. She knew that Rose was an overachiever. She knew Rose could be sassy at times, but rarely (therefore, Lily liked her rarely). She knew Rose had probably never heard of conditioner. But most things, most private, intimate things, she had just now started learning about Rose. Ever since Lily and Scorpius started their nightly rendezvouses at the beginning of the school year, she learned more and more about her cousin. Some surprising, some weird, some funny. She now knew that Rose rarely had sex—she didn't find it enjoyable, leaving Scorpius in a tough position. Lily never knew someone as attractive as Scorpius could actually be begging for sex.

Lily also now knew that Rose loved to go on dates, which also put Scorpius in a tough position, since he was by no means made of money. Rose loved to study, which Lily already knew, but now she also knew that Rose went to such lengths as to record the professor speaking while she took notes at the same time and highlighted from the textbooks. Rose also only started brushing her hair when, at the beginning of her second year, she discovered a dreadlock among her massive curls, a story Scorpius found both adorable and quirky—disgustingly so, in Lily's opinion.

"She seems 'good enough' to me," Lily amended. Scorpius had a faint smile as he nodded. Lily frowned. Scorpius handed her the finished joint. She chuckled at his happy smile and said, "Beautiful!"

Scorpius scooted closer to her to light the end for her with his wand. Philip had never done that for her. She could remember his face as he would say "do it yourself, Lily. Don't be a baby." Philip had never even let her have the first hit. But Scorpius did those sorts of things—he was just a gentleman like that. She could see why Rose loved him, why so many people were taken with him.

"Just like me," he joked.

"Honestly," she agreed. His eyes bugged for a second, but he didn't comment. Luckily Lily was able to take a hit during what would have been an awkward silence. As she exhaled, she passed the joint back to him between pinched fingers.

Lily settled back against the pillar behind her, tried not to think about Rose. Rose seemed to be everywhere lately, as she got closer to Scorpius and he began to sit with them every day at every meal. It was becoming more and more apparent to everyone with eyes or an attention span that a friendship had blossomed between Lily and Scorpius. She didn't care for coming up for excuses for their inside jokes; she didn't really care if Rose knew about their late-night hangouts. It wasn't like they were doing anything bad—you know, besides illegal drugs. Rose didn't seem bothered, anyways. Lily had kind of wished she would be.

Scorpius broke the silence by saying, "Rose is so weird."

Lily hated talking about Rose with Scorpius. He talked about her all the time, and it was getting old. She forgave him for it because Rose did happen to be his long-time girlfriend, and for moments like this where the lead into the conversation was a negative perspective on Rose instead of something usual like "didn't she look pretty today?" or "Rose said something funny earlier" or "Rose is so smart."

"Yeah, she is really weird," Lily agreed. "Why this time?"

Scorpius laughed and bumped her shoulder. "She told me I was her first, but I'm almost positive I wasn't."

Lily scrunched her nose at the thought of the two of them having sex, but replied anyway, "And why are you positive of that? She's like a plant."

Scorpius cracked up laughing, a high buzzing through him. "A… a p-plant?" he sputtered through laughter.

"She's, like, asexual," Lily replied, giggling.

"Because," Scorpius caught his breath, "she told me she'd come on to guys before but they never took the bait."

Gee, I wonder why, Lily thought rather pettily. "She's never even had crushes before, though. Which guys could she have possibly gone for?"

"Um, okay, I think she said only two… Philip, remember him? Head boy a couple years ago, and then Henrik, head boy from last year. And now I'm Head Boy. I guess she's attracted to power. Ha." Scorpius wasn't smiling anymore, and neither was Lily.

"Oh, my god," Lily muttered, almost dropping the joint. Her face drained of blood, and her companion noticed. "Philip?"

"Yeah," Scorpius replied. "I was surprised, too."

"When?"

"Right after him and Ava broke up."

Lily's chest tightened. She couldn't breathe. She felt like she was going to vomit. Rose and Philip? It was worse than any thought she could possibly conceive, even worse than Rose and Scorpius having sex.

"They hooked up?" Lily snapped, anger filling her. She hadn't seen Philip in over a year, but she wanted to track him down and give him a piece of her mind. Her cousin? Really, her own family? Who else? Roxy? Dominique? Molly, maybe even fellow fifth-year Lucy?

"No. Apparently she just flirted with him, but he was obviously still hung up on Ava," Scorpius said.

"Oh," Lily breathed, the anger leaving her as fast as it had come. Being high made it difficult to stay mad—or even be mad.

"Why? Did you have a crush on him or something?" Scorpius laughed at seemingly the mere thought of it. Lily didn't find it funny at all, and didn't respond. Scorpius put his arm around her briefly before withdrawing awkwardly and saying, "Aw, it's just a joke, Lily."

Her name coming from those lips made her feel uncomfortable. The way he said those two syllables seemed too intimate for anyone's ears besides her own. She turned her head away, hoping to hide any emotions her face might betray in her intoxicated state.

"Fine," Lily whispered, partly because she was embarrassed, partly because of the smoke filling her lungs and burning her throat. "I didn't have a crush on him, though." Technically, she hadn't. She had felt much stronger feelings than that. She had been in love with him.

"Yeah, I mean, that was like, two years ago. You were in… third year. That's too young to have a crush anyway."

Defensively: "Excuse me? Haven't you liked Rose since third year? Yeah, so shut up."

Scorpius smiled, "So you did have a crush on him."

"If I say I had a crush on him, will you shut up?" Lily snapped. Scorpius just laughed. He seemed to always laugh at what Lily said, jokes or not. Maybe it was because he was stoned, maybe it was because he was just a naturally happy person. Either way, Lily liked his laugh. It was never condescending or mean.

"No, you can never make me shut up. You should know that by now. Only one thing can make me shut up," Scorpius said with a devilish smile.

Lily rolled her eyes. "You talk about sex too much."

"Hey, you're the one who said it. What if I was talking about something else?"

"It's still true. You talk about sex a lot. You haven't even been sexually active for that long. You lost your virginity, what, like, yesterday?" Lily scoffed. In all reality, he had lost it in October the previous year, but she was getting annoyed of his bravado. And in even more reality, hearing about Rose's sex life annoyed her the most.

"Shut up. You're just jealous because you've never had sex," he said with a triumphant smile.

Lily ducked her head in her hood and mumbled, "Ooh, you got me."

"Sorry, I really shouldn't be talking about sex with someone so young. Little Lily," he chuckled. He had a carefree smile on his face and no idea of Lily's growing anger. Still, she stopped herself from saying anything brash. It didn't matter. And the last thing she wanted to say was that she had already had sex—more than he had, according to Rose's dwindling libido. No one would know; only Philip, Ava, and she would ever know, unless one of them decided to tell someone else. She had a feeling they wouldn't, and she definitely wouldn't.

"Then stop talking about it," Lily sighed. It wasn't like she gained anything from hearing him talk about how horny he was or how good it felt. She already knew those things, and she was in the same boat. The only difference was that he had Rose and she had no one. And she certainly didn't like being called 'Little Lily.'

Scorpius was quiet for a while, and when Lily finally looked over at him in curiosity, she saw why. He was offended.

"Oh, Scorpius," Lily exhaled, "I'm sorry. You know you can tell me anything." But her voice was flat. Then again, her voice was semi-regularly flat.

"Yeah, I know. I'm just… I haven't said it but… I feel like Rose and I are going through a rough patch. We're not in the honeymoon phase anymore and she never wants to go out unless it's some big fancy date, she doesn't get excited to see me anymore, we don't—I mean… never mind." His admission ended with a blush in his cheeks and an aggressive toss of the finished joint over the ledge. Lily watched it fall until it became a little brown dot and vanished.

"I didn't know that," Lily said, suddenly feeling particularly shitty. Rose's downfall would make her feel apathy, but Scorpius' on the other hand… "I thought she was just… busy."

"Well, she is, she's busy. But also she just doesn't make time for us. I guess it's just something I'll have to get used to," he lamented.

"No," Lily argued. She shook her head in frustration, knowing what it felt like to get pushed around, to be ignored and not cared for. "You should tell her. You care about her, and if she doesn't give 100% like you do, then she isn't worth it. I know she's my family, and I love her, but she's not perfect. Most likely, she doesn't even know how you're feeling because her head's stuck in a book." And a stick's shoved up her arse.

Scorpius shifted to face her, a smile growing across his face. Lily smiled back, a little unsurely—those dimples were contagious. He spoke, "I didn't realize Little Lily was so wise!"

"Call me Little Lily one more time," she growled jokingly, grabbing his shoulder and pretending to push. They burst into laughter as he pretended to struggle and lose balance, and for a second Lily thought he actually might fall, but he leaned back just in time with an ease and grace she couldn't help but wonder at.

"Fine," he sighed. "You win. You're younger than me, but you're smarter than me, so no more 'Little Lily.' Even though you're so cute and little." He gave her a mischievous little smile and she felt her stomach turn.

"You know what else is little?" Lily said innocently.

"What?"

"Your d—," she started, just as he caught on and cut her off with a loud "NO! RUDE!"

More laughter ensued until their eyelids became heavy with fatigue. They began their walk back to Gryffindor just as the moon dipped behind some thick clouds. Their paths split in front of the Fat Lady, when he headed to Slytherin. That was another thing about Scorpius—he always walked her back home, just to be sure she made it safely.

They never hugged goodbye. That seemed a little too weird, and neither had tried. That night Lily thought about hugging him as he turned and gave her a little wave, but he began to walk away and he was rounding the corner before her heart slowed and she could finally move.

Roxy sat across from Lily at dinner the next night in a tight leather skirt, a white blouse, and her corkscrew curls natural and wild around her bronzed cheeks. She was smiling at Lily intensely, waiting for her to ask the question…

"Tonight?"

"Tonight," Roxy affirmed.

Lily smiled a close-mouthed smirk and pushed her plate away, grabbing her bag and her hoodie and running out of the Great Hall and up to Gryffindor Tower. She threw her stuff down at the foot of her bed (where she threw all of her things—a pile had begun to form) and stripped off her clothes.

Sorting through the clothes she had yet to unpack from her trunk and the dirty clothes in the pile, she found the outfit she had put together in her mind for when this night came—a black, tight, lacy little number that she had bought during the summer when she and Roxy had gone on a shopping trip into Muggle London and found a store that had adult clothes catered to their small sizes. Lily had never dressed that way before, but when she had tried it on in the dressing room, it had pushed up her boobs in a way she liked. It showed off the slimness of her waist and the roundness of her arse. She liked the way she looked in it—she was hardly ever out of a hoodie and jeans, and when she was, it was in school clothes.

That hot summer day, Lily and Roxy came back with their cute new clothes stuffed in their purses and shrugged and frowned to their parents, lamenting that they couldn't find anything that looked witchy enough.

Lily tugged it on, struggling to pull up the zipper until she remembered her magical abilities and used her wand instead. She teased her wavy hair out and smudged eyeliner around her light blue eyes, carefully applied some soft pink lipstick just a bit outside her lip line (which she knew made her lips look pouty and seductive). The last touch—nude high heels she had bought with her new dress. She was ready. And she looked too good.

Roxy texted her on her new flip phone—outside HFP dorm

Lily tried to walk quietly to Roxy, but her new heels were loud. She tried to charm them into being quieter, but she could only walk a couple of steps before the clacking crescendoed back to its original decibel. Eventually she took off her heels and walked barefoot, tip-toeing past hallways and dipping behind a tapestry when she saw a light headed toward her.

Finally she met with Roxy, but she wasn't alone.

"Hey," her cousin whispered, "look who I brought!"

There stood Rose hand-in-hand with Scorpius. Between the two of them, they stood out like a sore thumb. Rose wore what Lily could only describe as camp counselor chic. A tie-dye t-shirt and jean shorts that were a little too long to be cute, in Lily's opinion, and frayed at the ends. Scorpius looked better than Rose, however—not a difficult feat—but was still dressed too casual for the occasion.

"We're going to a club. You know that, right?" Lily said frankly to Rose.

Despite the darkness, Lily could see a blush rise across her cousin's cheeks. Rose stammered, "Well, at least I don't look like a prostitute."

"Rose, I don't think you even know what a prostitute looks like, so shut up," Lily snapped. "You invited her?" she directed to Roxy.

"Lily," Scorpius admonished. Lily felt herself shrink back, although she didn't know why she cared so much. She was stung.

"I-I thought it would be fun. You know, the more the merrier?" Roxy offered. "I invited Dom too, but she was busy… unfortunately." It was obvious that Roxy didn't find this very unfortunate.

"I was just kidding. Of course I'm glad Rose came. It will be fun," Lily said without much conviction, but it was enough to make the tension dissipate.

They headed out, and while they walked, Scorpius fell back a bit from Rose to talk to Lily.

"Are you mad that I came? I hope it's not weird," Scorpius said, his voice low, his eyes meeting hers in a way that was restrained and awkward.

Lily felt warm, uncomfortably warm. She wasn't wearing much, but she felt like she was wearing a parka. His gaze was worrying—like he could see right through her. She was concerned that if he could see right through her, what could he see? After a stress-filled pause: "Of course it's not weird. Why would it be weird?"

"Good," Scorpius said, not answering her question like she was kind of hoping he would. Because it did feel weird. It felt really weird. She was hoping maybe he had an inkling as to why. But she never got the chance to find out. He quickened his pace to catch back up to Rose, grabbing his girlfriend's hand so seamlessly that it was obviously natural for them. Lily let her gaze linger at their entwined hands just as she heard Roxy say to Rose, "Do I look like a prostitute, too?"

"No one looks like a prostitute," Scorpius said exasperatedly. Lily smiled softly in the darkness, a smile that met with his as he turned his head slightly to look at her.

They arrived at a club that was hidden underneath an apartment complex on the far side of Hogsmeade Village. It was an hour walk, made worth it by the thrill of their rebellion and the promise of what the night could lead to. Fred had told Roxy about the secret club called Vice that held special events once a month featuring local bands and DJs. Fred passed the information down to Roxy along with the date of these so-called special events, as they were extra exclusive and only announced privately, to only a certain few, so that the parties were especially elite.

Being wizarding royalty had its perks.

Lily had drawn close to her three companions, because although she hardly felt scared, walking through this seedy part of town at night was not a comforting experience. She drew especially close to Scorpius, who noticed her hesitation and linked his arm through hers. Maybe that action would have made Lily feel special, if it weren't for the fact that his other arm was occupied holding his girlfriend's hand.

However, Lily felt her fear melt away as they walked down some steps and stood before a door with a rusted, old apartment number nailed to the black-paint-chipped door: 7C. The seven was hanging so that it looked like a 'V', indicative of the club's name. They were definitely at the right place. Although there were heavy charms put on the door to prevent noise escaping the club, Lily could feel heavy bass vibrating under her heels.

By magic, the door opened as they arrived, permitting their entrance, no bodyguard necessary. What Lily saw inside made her eyes widen, while Scorpius sucked in a surprised breath of air beside her.

The club was filled to the brim with moving silhouettes, bright lights swirling and flickering, lighting up each person like colorful lightning in the dark. Suddenly Rose's tie-dye shirt no longer mattered—everyone looked as if they could be wearing tie-dye. It wasn't until Lily passed the threshold and stepped onto the concrete basement flooring that she heard the loud, pumping bass that made her whole body quiver.

Without any hesitation, Lily and Roxy grabbed hands and melted into the crowd. Lily briefly looked back to see Scorpius looking after her while Rose nervously looked around. Lily waved a beckoning hand to him, and he smiled and followed, letting his girlfriend's hand go. Rose watched him go in surprise, then quickly followed before he was lost in the mob.

Four very different reactions occurred that night. Roxy felt free and beautiful, and even more confident looking at her cousin beside her, who looked racy in a way she never had before. With a nod to Lily, they parted ways. Roxy loved to dance, but hardly got a chance to. A top 40s muggle song was being remixed over the blasting speakers, and soon she was adrift in a sea of pumping bodies, following their moves and gaining some attention from the guys surrounding her. None of them knew Roxy was fifteen, or that she was a Weasley, or that she was a Hufflepuff. She smiled a secret smile to one of them—he wasn't the cutest, but he was the best dancer—and pulled him closer by the front of his shirt.

Lily wasn't quite as comfortable with jumping right in. She pushed her way through the club in search of the bar. When she reached it, a worry cropped up in her mind she hadn't thought of—did they I.D.? Did she look old enough to pass for seventeen? She knew she looked older in her current state, but she was undeniably small. Not only was she short at just a bit over five feet, but she was skinny, too. But she wanted to let off some steam and release some of the tension squirming in her stomach.

Lily reached the back of the club, and there it was. A long bar with tons of people surrounding it. In her mind, she would just slide onto a stool and call the waiter with a casual wave of her hand. She'd order a shot—that's all her body needed to get tipsy—and then move on. But there were no stools in sight, and if there had been, they'd all be taken up. And it looked like it could take a while to order.

She approached the bar and tried to stand on her toes, because despite her heels, she still wasn't tall enough to see over the shoulders in front of her. After a couple of beats of the song, she pushed between the people in front of her, ignoring their protests and reaching the front. She waved a hand but realized she really didn't have to—a bartender was helping the guy right next to her.

"What'll it be?" he yelled over the music.

"A shot of tequila," Lily yelled back.

"Cuervo or Patron?"

"Cuervo," she improvised, unsure what it meant. Types of tequila?

"Hey! She just got here!" a girl in a slinky dress with deep cleavage yelled next to her, much louder than they had been yelling.

"I don't care," the bartender replied, "don't you know who this is?"

For a moment, Lily felt taken aback. He knew who she was? Maybe she looked like someone he knew. But still, the wording of the question was odd if that was the possibility. Then she realized. This had happened to her brothers before, but never her—not so far. She knew she was featured in some gossip magazines for various things—for instance, while she was at a grocery store checkout line with her mum, she saw a blurb in Witch Weekly with a picture of her and Lorcan Scamander sitting together at a Gryffindor versus Slytherin quidditch match. The caption questioned their relationship—were they young lovebirds? But being recognized in public without her family with her was something that had never happened before.

"I don't give a fuck who this is—," she started before he cut her off, "Lily Potter!"

The guy next to her nursing a rum and coke perked up, facing them and exclaiming, "Merlin! It is! Wow, you're even more beautiful in person." He put on a charming smile and told the bartender whatever she ordered was on him. The girl to her right was scoffing, whether in awe or annoyance, Lily paid no mind. She was now paying special attention to the guy next to her—a very cute young wizard, she realized.

"Thanks," Lily said, grateful for the wild lighting that hid her blush.

He leaned toward her and said in her ear, "I'm Greg Farris, nice to meet you." The smell of him overwhelmed her, heavy with cologne and sweat. She was intoxicated before her shot was even poured. She smiled demurely at him as his hand splayed against her lower back, sending warmth up and down her spine.

He ordered a shot along with her, and both of their shots were placed before them along with a salt shaker and a bowl of limes.

"Me first," he told her, and before she knew what was happening, he cupped her neck and pulled her towards him. She froze, unsure, but feeling adventurous. She couldn't believe what was happening as his warm, wet tongue traveled up the side of her neck. She let out a quiet moan, but he probably heard, because his body shook with a chuckle. He put salt where he had licked, and then took a lime and held it to her mouth.

"What?" Lily cried, feeling so giddy that she let out a series of nervous giggles.

"You bite it, love," he said with a smile so dazzling her knees felt weak. Even Philip's smile hadn't had this effect. And even with Scorpius somewhere in the same room, his perfect smile didn't even come to mind. She nodded and he put the lime in her mouth, his fingers lingering on her plump lips. She was worried she might be drooling, but hoped it might just look like lime juice. The tangy sourness jolted her senses, making her hyper-aware as he leaned back towards her neck. He licked up her neck again, making her shiver, but this time she managed to hold in her bodily reactions. He pulled back, downed his shot like a pro, made a face and then leaned towards her, like… like he was going to kiss her.

Lily was so surprised her head almost jerked back, but she forced herself to stay still. Her heart beat fluttered so fast, like butterfly wings, trapped in her chest and making her throat close up and her stomach clench. Greg cradled the back of her neck as he kissed her deeply around the lime, his tongue darting out and into her mouth, sucking the lime out and into his mouth. Lily's eyes slowly opened from the kiss, and she felt she might topple over from the pure force of it—not any sort of physical force, it wasn't a gentle kiss but it definitely wasn't aggressive—but in the sensual force of it. Greg was talented, Lily admitted to herself, smiling dizzily.

"Now you," he said. Lily followed his actions, holding onto his shoulders as she got up on her tiptoes and licked his neck, kissing and sucking briefly in a fleeting moment of allure, being so close to him, his potent smell, his warm, smooth skin. His hands clenched the back of her dress, his fingers digging into the sensitive flesh of her lower back. She applied the salt, licked up his neck again, and downed her shot. She realized she forgot the lime, quickly grabbed one and bit into it. When she turned back to him, their lips collided and they began to kiss vigorously, right in the middle of a crowd of people. Anyone could've seen them. Anyone could've taken a picture and sold it to a tabloid. Hell, one of her companions could see and interrupt her naïve actions. But in that moment, she didn't care. Her stomach was churning, warmth spreading through her bloodstream as the alcohol took its course.

People behind them began to complain about getting to the bar, so they pulled apart and Greg downed the rest of his now watered-down rum and coke and led her out to the dance floor.

Rose felt uncomfortable. She watched rather helplessly as her two beautiful cousins went off into the crowd and probably had the time of their lives, while she was left feeling too big, too under-dressed, and too dependent on the boy standing next to her. They obviously didn't fit in here. Her skin itched with the bass vibrating through her and the heat of a hundred bodies in a small, enclosed space. She felt she might collapse, and with this feeling, grabbed onto her boyfriend with desperation. Beyond that action, she had no idea what to do.

Drink? Rose had never had alcohol before. It was irresponsible, and she didn't turn seventeen until a month later, so it was illegal, too. Dance? She had never danced before, not like this, and definitely not with Scorpius. She just couldn't see herself grinding against Scorpius while he held onto her hips. No, that wasn't her. But what else could she do?

She looked over to Scorpius, who also seemed rather lost, looking around and wondering why he'd agreed to this. Secretly, deep down, he knew why. Lily could make anything fun. With her witty cynicisms and carefree attitude, she could make standing in line at the DMV an adventure. But now he was standing alone with Rose, and as beautiful and lovely and intelligent as Rose was, she was also uptight and timid and didn't belong here at all. He knew it would be more fun if he had just come here with Lily. With that thought, a deep sense of guilt ran through him. Scorpius pulled Rose close and led her towards the back, where hopefully a bar would be. If somehow he could get Rose to drink, or to let him drink, the night might take a turn for the better.

However, Rose dug her heels in and yelled into his ear, "Where are we going?"

"To the bar," he replied. Rose shook her head forcefully.

"No! I'm not seventeen."

Sigh. "But I am." He turned and started to walk again, but again, she dug in her heels.

"But… but you don't need alcohol to have fun!" she said hopefully, trying to smile her lovely smile. Scorpius wanted to laugh, but didn't want to hurt her feelings.

"Do you just want to leave?" Scorpius said exasperatedly. It was a rhetorical question, but as soon as it came out, he was worried she might actually agree and drag him back to Hogwarts so they could "cuddle" (not have sex).

"No, no, it's fine, let's go to the bar," Rose resigned. Scorpius smiled sarcastically and they walked to the bar. Rose stopped him again and pointed, looking amused. There was her cousin, Roxy, dancing with a rather big guy with smooth moves, his hands roving over her body, her leather skirt riding up dangerously high. Scorpius watched with jealousy as she turned around and dropped low, coming back up and grinding against the stranger. Jealousy because he knew he'd never get that, not with Rose, not with anyone. He'd never have that carefree, sexy fun. Again, guilt swept through him—he loved Rose. He didn't need that.

They continued to the bar, and it only got worse. Because there was Lily, and she was kissing someone. Scorpius jolted forward, but Rose held him back, her face etched with concern. "What on earth are you doing? What's wrong?"

"That guy has his grubby paws all over Lily!" Scorpius yelled, his hands clenching at his sides and his chest puffing out. A burning feeling blossomed in his cheeks and in his chest. Like—anger? Protectiveness?

"So what?" Rose said, grabbing his face, making him make eye contact with her. This usually calmed him down, but he still felt riled up, and even more so when she said, "She seems like she's okay with it." Scorpius yanked his face back from her grip and back to the embracing couple. Well, shit. Lily did really seem to like it. One of her small, delicate hands was buried in the fabric of his shirt at his back, the other tangled in the stranger's hair. Scorpius came down a bit from his heightened emotions, letting out a long breath.

"Oh. Sorry. Let's go," Scorpius said, pulling her towards the opposite end of the bar from where her cousin stood. Rose followed in confusion.

Scorpius fought his way to the front, and after a fifteen minute wait, ordered his overpriced drink. He offered a sip to Rose. Her response was exclaiming that she had to go to the bathroom, and she disappeared into the crowd before he could protest. He finished his drink, checking his watch as Rose was gone for five, ten, fifteen, eighteen minutes. He had time to order another drink, finish it, and feel a buzz begin. The colors from the lights blended and swirled in an inexplicably satisfying way. However, he still felt an odd sense of melancholy as he stood alone, watching couples writhing and grinding and bouncing together.

Lily even made an appearance in the crowd, as for a split second the position of every person for about twenty feet or so cleared in a way that he could spot her dancing rather closely with the guy from the bar. In that brief glimpse, he saw her arms thrown around his neck, his head bent down to her level, their eyes locked and their faces smiling, their bodies touching and moving back and forth to the fast beat. His nostrils flared.

"Hey," Rose said, reappearing beside him. He looked to her and by the time he looked back, the crowd had surged back together so that Lily and the mystery man had disappeared. "Is that a new drink?" she questioned in an accusatory tone.

Annoyance shot through Scorpius as he replied, "Yeah, so what?" Rose shrunk back but didn't say anything else. A couple of minutes of silence passed between them before Roxy materialized before them, stumbling a bit and grabbing onto Rose for support.

"Rose, I just had five shots!" she screamed so loudly that several people around them turned to look at her in amusement. She was smiling ear to ear, and her skirt was definitely ridden up too far. She was holding onto Rose and then her eyes rolled back in her head. She lost her grip—luckily, Scorpius' arms shot out, holding her up. Her eyes shot back open and she pushed away from him, frowning deeply.

"Hey, don't touch me! You're dating my cousin! How dare you!" Roxy screeched nastily. Scorpius quickly pulled away, astonished. Rose laughed beside him, good-natured in even the most awkward of moments.

"Honey, let's take you home," Rose said, putting her arm around Roxy in support. Roxy smiled dreamily. "Scorpius, let's go."

"No!" Roxy insisted, backing away from Scorpius and dragging Rose with her. "He just came onto me! It was disgusting!" Rose tilted her head back and let out a hoot of laughter. Scorpius didn't find it that funny. People were looking, probably thinking he was a pervert.

"It's okay. I'll be home in a bit. You two go ahead," Scorpius said, rolling his eyes.

"Okay, see you tomorrow at breakfast? And make sure Lily gets home safe," Rose said, never one to cause a scene. He nodded and they disappeared, and he was truly alone. Except for Lily, who was somewhere deep in the crowd, probably getting groped on the dance floor. Little Lily. Was that her first kiss? Young, exciting, cool Lily, getting felt up on the dance floor by some douchebag who was undeserving.

Scorpius decided, yes, he was leaving. He walked out, not meaning to, but looking around for Lily and not spotting her. And also not meaning to take his glass with him. Opening the door and stepping outside, he was met with an astonishing, penetrating coldness and silence that sobered him in an instant.

He shook his head in wonder. Why the hell was he leaving? He couldn't just leave Lily behind, but he wasn't going back in there. He sat on the steps leading up to the sidewalk, set his drink down beside him, and settled in to wait for his friend to come out.

Scorpius leaned his head on the railing, the cool metal soothing his pounding head. He waited for maybe thirty minutes as people left in groups, walking around him and chatting loudly in their inebriated state, before his eyes drifted closed and he fell asleep.

Lily was being led down a hallway, her fingers intertwined with a stranger's.

Greg was twenty. He worked at a restaurant in muggle London as a waiter, and when he went to Hogwarts, he was a Hufflepuff who played seeker for two years before suffering a shoulder injury and quitting. Something else very important about Greg—he had whispered something very naughty in her ear only moments before on the dance floor, making her whole body go hot with attraction.

They went up some stairs in the hallway and pushed out a door with an exit sign above it. The moon was high in the sky, lighting up their features better than it had in the funky lighting of the club. Now she noticed different things about him as he pushed her up against the brick wall of the building and brought his face close to hers. He had freckles which made him look younger, and brown hair. His eye color, which she had been able to tell was light, she realized was a light hazel. His teeth were a bit crooked, but nothing too bad. He had no facial hair, but probably not by choice—he had a baby face. She wondered what she looked like to him—if her make-up was smeared now, if she was sweating too much, if he still found her sexy.

The response to the last question became clear as he confirmed it with a searing kiss. It turned sloppy as it deepened, and his hands roved over her breasts, squeezing and fondling in a way that wasn't pleasant, but if it made him feel good, she didn't mind. His hands moved down to her thighs, where he started to nudge her dress up. After a few minutes of his hands caressing her upper thighs, only having made an inch or two of progress, she pulled away, exasperated.

Lily hiked up her dress to just below her panty line, then jumped in a moment of impulsivity and passion, wrapping her legs around his waist and pulling his face back towards hers. They slammed back against the brick wall behind them. He kissed her neck, hitting an erogenous zone and working at it until she was panting and whining, bucking against his crotch. He was hard, and she felt it—boy, did she feel it.

Greg jumped a bit to hold her above his waist, unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, and with assistance from Lily's feet, his trousers and pants were soon around his ankles.

With a shove of her thong to the side, he slid in her, and she whimpered. It had been over a year. She'd be lying if she said she didn't miss it. It helped that she was really attracted to him and, well, really wet.

They fucked against the brick wall. It wasn't nearly as satisfying as it might have been with Philip, who knew her likes and dislikes, but in other ways, was way more satisfying. She'd never see Greg again. He had a large cock. His eyes were searing. He didn't have a girlfriend she'd have to pass in the hallway every day—she had asked. And he was a great kisser.

Lily didn't quite come—it had been building throughout, but was cut off when he pulled out and came all over the concrete steps beside them, groaning in a theatrical way that made her giggle. He pulled out his wand and used a spell to clean himself up, then got dressed. Lily pulled her dress back down and patted down her sex-hair.

He walked back over to her, took her face in his hands, and began to kiss her again. Lily felt an urge to leave. Now that they'd had sex, there was nothing else to build up to. She pulled her face away and whispered, "I have to go."

"Okay," he said, but started kissing her again. She gently pushed him away, and he let her go, smiling at her in an intimate sort of way that made the heat she had felt during their tryst return. Okay, she thought. Maybe I can milk this a bit more to my benefit.

And behind Vice where no one could see, a stranger named Greg went down on Lily and finished what he started.

Scorpius woke with a start, then quickly realized what had woken him. Lily stood over him, leaning forward and shaking his shoulder. He fought not to look down her cleavage.

"Hey, sleepyhead. You trying to get mugged?" she joked with a smile. He laughed and shook his head.

"I was waiting for you; I didn't mean to fall asleep. What time is it?" Scorpius said groggily.

Lily sat down beside him and grabbed his arm, peering close down at his wristwatch. Her hair fell over her shoulder and onto his lap, wine red in the darkness and fragrant—like flowers. And sweat. Scorpius inhaled deeply, quietly, so she wouldn't know.

"Oh, shit. Four in the morning. Let's get back home," Lily informed. She hopped up and grabbed his hand, helping him up in his tired state.

"You're too peppy for me right now," Scorpius said, fake-annoyed but smirking down at her.

"Huh. I've been called many things, but I have to admit, 'peppy' isn't one of them," Lily joked. She linked her arm through his and pulled him up the steps. She was happy. Too happy. Radiant, actually.

"So I guess things went well with that guy?" Scorpius said carefully. He didn't want to reveal he didn't approve, in case she clammed up and didn't tell him what happened between them.

"I mean, I guess. I'm never going to see him again, if that's what you're asking." She shrugged, smiling up at him.

"Good. Because he's too old for you. How old was he, anyway?"

"He's only 20, Scorpius." Lily rolled her eyes, trying to play it off. But it was a thought that had definitely crossed her mind. A twenty-year-old man who must have known how young she was… it was creepy. In the moment, it had seemed daring and sexy, but in the light of day, Greg had just been a graduate with no real career options and looking for a shag. He wasn't trustworthy, and he could easily spread it around that they had had sex. But would he? Lily was betting that he wouldn't, purely because of the age difference.

Lily also remembered that Philip was twenty now. It wasn't like she'd never hooked up with an older guy before. Still… it seemed different. Philip had been different for her. He had meant something.

Scorpius, true to her expectations, was taken aback, spluttering and upset.

"That's disgusting! Lily, he took advantage of you. I should've stopped him! Rose should've let me—,"

"Wait. You tried to stop him?" Something about his half-admission gave Lily pleasure. Scorpius, coming to her rescue. It gave her a thrill. She wondered what would have happened if he had stopped them. Would Greg have punched him? The idea of Scorpius wiping away blood from a split lip with anger in his eyes made Lily bite her lip and blush. Would he have punched Greg back? That idea appealed to her even more.

"Well, Rose stopped me. She was right to, I could've caused trouble," Scorpius answered. Lily frowned, her imagination reigning back in. It was completely out of character for Scorpius to ever punch someone. Come to her defense, maybe, but never one to cause a fight. Scorpius was diplomatic, and he was smart. Lily thought this made him the perfect head boy, somehow completely different than the head boy she had known so well before.

"Yeah," Lily agreed weakly.

They walked together into town before Lily was nearly crying from pain (from her shoes), fatigue (from the night's vigorous activities), and insobriety (from the tequila). They still had a thirty-minute walk ahead of them, and because of that knowledge, Lily fell to the ground, right onto her arse. Her thighs scraped the pavement, but she didn't care. She kicked off her shoes and saw that her heels were bleeding. Just the sight of it made her collapse in tears.

Scorpius fell to his knees beside her, cradling her head partly to comfort her, partly to keep her from collapsing completely.

"Oh, Lily, I know. Tonight was too much strain on you, wasn't it? Too much stimulation," Scorpius said the first half to her, and muttered the last half to himself, already going into brainstorming-mode. He looked around and saw, a block away, the answer to his prayers.

"Lily, there really is a God," he said excitedly. Without warning, he picked her up, one arm holding her shoulders and one arm under her knees. "Wow, you're light."

"I weigh eighty-five pounds," Lily whimpered, still crying quietly. Scorpius laughed, and she smiled weakly up at him as he began to walk down a street to their right. Lily tipped her head against his shoulder, trusting him completely. "Where are we going?" she asked casually.

"See that motel up there? We're going to stay there tonight," Scorpius told her.

"How romantic. But what about my shoes?" she said dryly.

"Fuck 'em."

The room they entered was exactly what they paid for. Low price, cheap quality.

Lily didn't care.

She went into the bathroom without a word, ignoring the fact that there was carpet with mysterious stains and that the drain was surrounded by dirt. She stripped off her dress and underwear, the only clothes she was wearing, turned on the water, and stepped under the cold spray. In under thirty seconds, she was sobered up.

Lily used the cheap bar of soap to wash her face of any make-up, and the shampoo to wash her sweaty hair. Once she was done, she wrapped herself in a towel and reentered the bedroom. Scorpius saw her and quickly looked away.

"I don't have any clothes," Lily admitted, embarrassed. "And… and you can turn around… I don't mind." Lily's face went hot, and suddenly she was hyper-aware of her makeup-less face, the immense amount of freckles across her tiny, pale shoulders and clavicle, and her knotted, wet hair, slicked back from her naked, flushed face. She felt bare and vulnerable, more than ever before.

Scorpius turned around, his blue eyes very obviously sticking to her face, but he didn't say a word, his eyes wide and confused. He approached her slowly, as if she might run off, unbuttoning his shirt along the way.

"Here," he said, shrugging off his flannel shirt and handing it to her. Luckily, any further embarrassment or nudity was avoided as he wore a white wife beater underneath. Still, Lily was embarrassed. His shoulders were tan and broad. Not muscular, but filled out and strong. She knew if she reached out, if she let her hand connect with his bare skin, he would be hot to the touch.

"Thanks," she murmured, taking the soft fabric from him. They stared at each other for another intense moment before she excused herself to change in the bathroom. She fled the room and closed the bathroom door behind her, quickly—practically slamming it in her desperation to be alone. Oh Merlin, what was happening? Her stomach felt like lead. Her head was pounding. Was she still drunk?

Lily pulled on her underwear and buttoned the shirt over her cold body. Scorpius' shirt landed at her upper-thigh, no higher than the dress she had worn earlier, but was somehow racier than the dress had been. Her hair dripped down her back, wetting the shirt and making it cling to her shivering spine. She pulled the collar closed around her face, breathing in deeply his warm, masculine scent. It was heady and strong within the cloth, and she felt as if Scorpius himself was embracing her. The shirt ghosted over her breasts, making her nipples harden. Lily gasped and crossed her arms over her chest, giving herself a few moments to calm down before leaving the safe space of the motel bathroom.

"I'm back!" Lily exclaimed with a silly smile, jumping back into the room, hoping to lighten the awkward mood. But upon seeing Scorpius sitting up in bed, she felt her smile and any happiness she had tried to fill this moment with flee the room. Oh Merlin, the bed. Were they to sleep in the same bed together?

Upon seeing her confused, horrified face, Scorpius quickly said, "It's a pretty big bed, but I can sleep on the floor if you'd rather?" A moment of silence passed between them before he quickly added, "No, you're right, that's stupid, I'll just sleep on the floor—,"

"No!" Lily practically yelled. His shocked expression made her tense muscles relax to reassure him, "I mean, no. It's fine. It is a rather large bed." She laughed for no apparent reason at all, other than that she was nervous and the silence would have killed her.

She walked over and fell into bed with him. The last time she had been in a boy's bed… well, she hadn't exactly been in the bed as she had been bent over it. This situation was entirely different, but somehow felt just as exciting and wrong. But this time, she was scared. Inexplicably scared.

"I guess I'll be going to sleep now," Lily said awkwardly. She slid down under the covers and closed her eyes. Scorpius turned off the lamp, rustled around a bit, and before long, his heavy breaths filled the room. Lily smiled at the endearing sound, allowing herself to relax and push away any feelings of foreboding, and soon enough, she had fallen asleep, too.

Lily was awoken by a light shining in on her face, the scrappy curtains that the motel provided doing hardly anything to shield her from the intense light. She sat up slowly, confused at first by her surroundings. Off-white sheets were twisted up around her bare legs from a restless night of sleep. She was wearing a shirt that wasn't hers, but smelled like…

Scorpius! He was still there, sleeping next to her, blankets tossed to the floor, his face red from the warmth in the room. He only wore boxers and a white wife beater. He lay on his side, hands touching as if in prayer, propping his face up from the pillow. His mouth was open, and air whistled between his teeth in a soothing rhythm. His breath hitched and his eyes suddenly opened, as if sensing her stare.

Their eyes met, and he stared at Lily for a moment before smiling and saying, "What's going on?" His smile faded as he read Lily's expression and sat up suddenly, holding a hand to his head as the room spun around him. "Wait. Wait. What's—what time is it?" Shame flooded every feature of him then—his expression, the crease in his brow, the pout of his lips, the way he shrunk away from her as if she had just told him she was ill and contagious.

Lily hopped out of bed, careful to pull the hem of his shirt farther down her thighs, then ran to the window and pushed open the curtains, as if she could tell the exact time just by looking at the sky. What she could tell, however, was that the sun was pretty high. Morning had passed. And they were still gone. At a seedy motel.

She ran back over to him and grabbed his wrist, reading his watch: "It's—oh my god, it's 1:30." Lily sat back against the pillows behind her and let her head drop in her hands. It was late enough that people would be wondering where they were and why they were missing—together.

Scorpius seemed to follow her train of thought before he got up, quickly pulling on his jeans and running his hands through his hair repeatedly and vigorously. "It's okay! It's okay! You know why it's okay? It's Saturday—Hogsmeade Saturday. So… so Rose will probably just think I got home late and left early to go into town. Yeah! Yeah, she'll probably just think that!" Scorpius' smile was so fake it was silicone.

Lily knew Scorpius was only trying to comfort himself. Rose was on his radar right now, not Lily. When he looked at her, she was sure he couldn't really see her at all. In his mind, he was already getting his fingers caught in Rose's knotted curls, his lips pushing across her pink ears, his voice saying sorry, it didn't mean anything, it was an accident, I was drunk, I'm so sorry.

Lily couldn't stand another moment with her thoughts. She got up and went to change in the bathroom, robotically unbuttoning his shirt and pulling her dress back on. She didn't have shoes, but she didn't care. She'd walk through broken glass all the way back to Hogwarts if it meant getting away from Scorpius.

But it didn't matter, because when she reentered the room, he was gone.