Disclaimer: All WWE content is owned by Vincent Kennedy McMahon and any use here is purely for entertainment value only. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: Jeff Hardy had made a successful comeback after years away from the WWE, and he should be on cloud nine but he finds himself lost with no direction. Can a person from his past come back and change him for the better or will he be lost forever?
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Series: Mended Hearts Series
The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
"I'm listening."
Jeff made his way over to the bed and sat down across from his brother, who had since put the laptop he had been working on away and was preparing to bring his brother up to speed. Jeff had known that something had happened back then, because Amy had eluded to it back when she was with Matt, but he hadn't given it much thought. He had walked away and wanted to make sure he didn't surround himself with the backlash.
"When you walked out that night, I'm sure you figured she was going to turn into a mess and you wouldn't be wrong on that. She ran to Amy and I. She needed answers because she said then that she didn't believe the ones that you had told her. She wanted to know if you were indeed into the drugs, and if it was making you do things you wouldn't normally do. We told her the truth on that front, and she knew it wasn't that anyway. I think the only reason she asked was because it was put on the table but those assholes in the WWE offices."
Jeff nodded and watched his brother intently. None of this sounded hard to take so he assumed the worst was yet to come.
"She then wondered what she had done to make you run from her. She knew that you were dating Beth and you wanted to be fair to her, which was true I think in hindsight, but she also knew that there was more to you leaving then what you were telling her. She felt that you were running from her, and for weeks afterwards she was a wreck. So much so that they faked an injury and gave her time off to deal with the demons. Jeff she went inside herself when you walked out and until Ron came along again, a blast from her past, she stayed there."
He swallowed the huge lump in his throat then and he felt the sickness rising up in his stomach. He had known there would be questions, but he never for one moment thought that she would believe it was all her doing and retreat inside herself the way Matt was explaining now. Just what had he done and was he ever going to be able to fix it?
"Which is why I know that she is going through this divorce now, and dealing with you is making it that much harder on her. I am afraid for the both of you. I think that if you do not take the past for what it is and let it go then you are both going to hurt each other. She is going to go inside of herself again and retreat away from the business she just came back too, and you, well Jeff we all know what you do when you aren't right in the head."
"Matt, I'm not going to run away again. I told you that already. I am a different man now."
Matt looked his brother square in the eye, trying to gage whether or not he was telling him the truth. When he was satisfied that Jeff was being honest with him, he spoke again.
"It's not a matter of you being different Jeff. It's about looking at this logically. Do you really want to cause her any more pain? If you for any reason know you cannot give her what it is she needs from you then you need to stay the hell away from her. For both of your sakes."
"And what if I can be what she needs?"
Matt looked at his brother and a small smile came across his lips. A smile that Matt Hardy did not usually give unless something was genuinely nice.
"Then I say you are in the wrong persons room right now man. I think if you believe you can be what she needs then you need to find her and tell her that. Make her see you for the man you are now and not the idiot that you were then."
She sat in the lightly lit living room and brought out the stack of old books she had been wanting to go through since she had moved into the house in Richmond Hill months before with her new husband. Or soon to be old husband if her lawyers had anything to do about it. She laid them on the sofa and went back into the kitchen to grab her glass of wine.
It had almost been four years since she had written in these books, the ending being right around the time that Jeff had left the company. As she opened the first one now, she knew she was going to be in for a lot of raw emotion and pain. But in order for her to be able to put the past where it was, to be able to move on as Jeff had said and live for the moment now, forsaking all others, then she had to read this. She had to come to terms with the woman she was then and the woman she was today.
She took a sip of wine, placing the glass down and she allowed herself to be enveloped by the past.
He kissed me tonight and I have never felt higher then I do right now. When he placed his arms around me, the heart of his body meeting with mine the way that it did, i think I felt the earth shift and the world stop for that whole second it took for him to put his lips to mine. I could feel him breathing on my cheeks and it felt wonderful but the feeling his lips left when the kiss was over felt even better.
I swear now, hours later I can taste him the way I could then. I can smell him around me as if at any moment he is going to walk through those doors and into my arms, telling me he had made a mistake being with Beth and that he knew where his heart lay now and it lay with me.
It may be wishful thinking on my part, but I have known him for years and we have never once had a moment so complete with emotions as this. We have finally reached the point where we care romantically for each other and I wish for so much more. I know it may never be but the want is there.
I am completely in love with Jeff Hardy and I think the time has finally come for me to admit it to him and be damned with the fallout.
She closed her eyes as she finished reading the entry and took herself back to that time when she had been so caught under a spell that she thought she could never be free from it. She had never gotten the chance to admit to him that she was in love with him because a week later he had come to her and told her of his plans to leave the company and never look back.
That was when her heart died, that night he had walked out and she had always thought that she would never recover. But then Ron had come back into her life like an angel and taken her away from it all, making her feel love the way she had hoped it would feel. So why wasn't she here with her husband now? Because the love he had shown her was not the love that she wanted and she knew it. She still craved Jeff Hardy's love and she knew that no other man would do it for her again until she had it.
Sipping another glass of wine, she stared at the phone, willing it to ring but at the same time wanting to pick it up and call herself. It was time now that she finally let herself feel again. It was time she came back out of the pain and did what Jeff wanted her too and that was focus on the future, what they could have now.
Without another moments notice she picked up the phone and dialed. She only hoped that she wasn't too late to fulfill what needed to be done for her to finally feel happy.
