Tale of the Two Lovers

by Ulquiorra9000

Chapter 3

Normally, patrolling the grounds of the Seireitei was some pretty tedious work. But today, Rukia hummed to herself as she leaped from rooftop to rooftop, her mind buzzing with ideas. She landed on a tree branch and crouched, watching people pass by underneath. Hmmmmm...

Momo's advice about creative writing stuck in Rukia's mind. Create compelling characters! Touch the heart of your readers, and express yourself truly. But how to do that? Writing about herself and Ichigo in a story... where did she even start? Ichigo... he meant so many things to so many people, and now, the carrot-top was Rukia's fiance, her future. And she was his. How did you write about that?

Rukia shook her head, half frustrated, half amused. It was easier to think of the simpler things in life, like a home-cooked meal, being with your friends, meeting someone new, watching sunsets... sentimental things like that. Ichigo was hardly ever sentimental, though. He was almost alien to her, even after all this time, being from the human world, with human thoughts and going to human high school...

Rukia gasped and clapped a hand over her mouth. That's it!

"Momo! MOMO!" Rukia flash-stepped across the Seireitei toward Squad 5's general patrol area, and she didn't stop until she landed right in front of Momo Hinamori. Rukia panted for breath, pointing at her editor. "Come with me!"

Momo blinked. "Rukia? What..."

"Now! C'mon!" Rukia grabbed the collar of Momo's robes, and both girls flash-stepped to Squad 13's barracks and into Rukia's office. Rukia firmly shut and locked the door.

Momo wiped her brow and smiled. "Oh, I think I know what this is about. Did your muse visit you?"

"Yeah. She sure did," Rukia said distractedly, rifling through all her stuff. There had to be... yes! A fresh sheet of paper and a pen full of ink. Rukia sat at her desk, shoved everything off with a sweep of her arm, and got to work. She wrote bold characters at the paper's top and underlined them.

Momo peeked over Rukia's shoulder with her arms folded, a curious look on her face. "Is that the title? Tale of the Two Lovers?"

"Yeah," Rukia said vaguely, already madly writing a column of characters on the right side of the page. "Here goes nothing..."

In the kingdom of rabbits lived the warrior-princess Raiko,

A noble lady of raven hair and deep eyes and cherry-red lips,

Her rabbit vassal Chappy beside her, guardian of her will.

From across the distant misty mountains emerged a wanderer,

The man Kuzo, with wild hair, his robes purple and yellow,

A black sword in his hands, his past unknown.

Kuzo spoke: "Where can I find the best sword master in this kingdom?"

Raiko stepped forth, discarding her kimono of pink and white,

Leaving her form-fitting black uniform, showing a warrior-princess's

Body of muscle and grace, a stunning queen of the sword.

The princess Raiko spoke: "I shall be your opponent, and

Should I best you, I shall have you in my court, mind and body."

"And should I win," the foreigner Kuzo spoke, "I shall have you,

Mind and body, fair maiden, and I may find joy in your company,

And behind closed doors, I shall discover what the maidens of this land

Can truly be, when intimate with a man such as I."

The princess Raiko

"Whoa, whoa!" Momo crossed her arms in an X. "Just where are you going with this, Rukia?"

Rukia smiled, her pen poised over the paper. "I'm just doing what you told me, Momo. You wanted me to dig deeper into my mind and my thoughts, and what I feel. Nothing is too minor."

Momo went pink. "Oh, I think I know what's coming next..."

"Darn right." Rukia kept writing.

The princess Raiko, true to her word, crossed katanas with the stranger

And in so doing, sheared his robes, leaving the scraps upon the grass

And she and the onlookers witnessed what a ravishing stallion of a man

Had crossed their borders.

"You have your victory," spoke Kuzo the wanderer. "What will you

Have of me, dear maiden?"

And he had his answer, later in the Rabbit Castle's deepest bedchambers

As Raiko the princess discarded her sweat-stained clothes

And ran her hands down her fair, smooth flesh.

"If you would have me, dearest wanderer," spoke the princess,

"Perhaps we can tussle again, and here, we will need only

Your sword, and I shall provide the sheath."

"Oh, no way!" Momo squealed, clutching her face with her hands, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet. "Write more! Write more, Rukia!"

Rukia nearly poked a hole in the paper in her haste to write more.

Once again the princess Raiko did a dance of two bodies

With the wanderer Kuzo, her bed frame creaking with exertion,

The sheets twisted and stain'd with the fiery passion.

"Are all the maidens of the Rabbit Kingdom thus?" inquired the wanderer.

"No, but I, as princess, must give a proper welcome,"

Spoke the princess Raiko. "No visitor has proven himself worthy

Of such a warm welcome, and my bed has been so cold as of late,

My body untried, untested, until this day."

Had she waited her whole life for the wanderer Kuzo?

This succulent being from a faraway land of metal and glass

Proved himself a master of the sword on the field of battle

And between the sheets of the castle's opulent bedchambers.

"I can imagine no other," Kuzo exclaimed in the throes of passion,

"No other maiden who can satisfy me so, and make me so whole."

"Stay awhile, if you will," the princess told him, "so you may

Prove your worth to my brother-in-law, the lord of this land,

For his heart is like stone."

The wanderer Kuzo agreed, and henceforth, he was no wanderer,

But as the new hero of the Rabbit Kingdom,

And as the companion of the bedchamber the princess

So craved...

Momo seized the paper and read it again, an embarrassed but delighted smile on her face. "R-Rukia," she croaked, "this is a wonderful first installment! I think that epic poetry really suits you."

"It does?" Rukia asked with false modesty, fanning herself. "A girl's got to try..."

Momo folded the paper in half, then half again. "We should take this straight to Squad 9! It'll make the perfect pitch to get Tale of the Two Lovers serialized in the Seireitei Bulletin!"

Giddy with excitement, Rukia followed Momo to Squad 9's barracks, her patrol totally forgotten. Heck, she wouldn't mind getting a reprimand later. Totally worth it!

Just as Momo reached for the barracks door -

"Wait a minute! Shouldn't you both be on patrol?"

Nanao Ise confronted them, adjusting her glasses and scowling at the two girls. Momo made a nervous giggle and lowered her arm.

"We were taking a short break," Momo said, "because -"

"May I see that?" Nanao swiped the folded-up paper and read it quickly, her eyes narrowed. Then she went red and returned it with a trembling hand. She held her other hand over her heart. "M-Momo, what is...?"

"It's mine," Rukia explained. "I-I'm experimenting on self-expression with literature, but if you don't like it, I understand -"

"No, no!" Nanao chuckled and waved a hand. "I mean, your technique may need some work, but..."

Could it be? Rukia gasped. "You like Tale of the Two Lovers?!"

"This is a breath of fresh air, to be honest," Nanao said, her voice rising with excitement. She beamed. "This could be really popular with readers! I help out Lieutenant Hisagi more than he'll admit with the Bulletin... I'll vouch for your material, Rukia, and make sure that Hisagi accepts your pitch. You can count on me!"

Momo patted Rukia's back. "Well, there you go, Rukia!"

Rukia looked down at her story again and cracked a wicked grin. Shuhei was gonna accept this... or else!

*o*o*o*o*

Oh, great. This is like a cliche in some story...

Ichigo snorted with amusement when his math teacher announced the arrival of a transfer student. And just two months before graduation? This new boy or girl had some pretty wacky timing...

"Class," Ms. Misato said, "please greet, uh..." She squinted at the paper in her hands. "Renji Abarai."

Ichigo threw up his hands in defeat when a familiar red-headed guy slouched into the room, already wearing the school uniform.

"Yo, everyone," he said. "I'm Renji. Nice to meet you."

Uryu glanced at Ichigo for an explanation, but Ichigo hastily looked away. This was already getting weird, and matters got worse when Renji took the empty desk to Ichigo's left.

"How you doin', Ichigo?" Renji muttered as Ms. Misato resumed the lecture. He leaned on his elbows on his desk. "Look, I gotta talk to you..."

Ichigo stared at the chalkboard and waved a hand. "We're not supposed to talk during class."

"But -"

"Can it, Lieutenant."

Renji scowled but fell quiet.

Mercifully, Ichigo didn't see gigai-Renji for the rest of his classes, and he occupied himself with soccer practice for an hour and a half after class. The sun was setting when Ichigo gathered all his stuff, slung his school bag over his shoulder, and trotted down the sidewalk to the Kurosaki Clinic.

That was when Ichigo saw Renji lounging by a lamppost, and the red-head jogged to catch up. "Hey," Renji started.

Ichigo made a face. "Did you wait for me the whole time?"

"Yeah. That soccer sport of yours takes forever," Renji complained. "I don't get humans."

"I get the feeling you didn't come all the way here just to learn algebra..."

"No. It's about Rukia." Renji got serious. "Ichigo -"

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me." Ichigo sped up, but Renji kept pace on those long legs of his.

"The Captain sent me," Renji explained. "Well... more like he offered this mission, and I volunteered, you see. I'm doing this for your sake, and Rukia's."

Ichigo grunted. "Doing what?"

"Setting you straight, man." Renji elbowed his friend. "C'mon, don't you realize what an honor it is, getting to marry into the Kuchiki family? Are you really that big an ingrate? I expected more from you, Ichigo."

"Hey, I'm not looking for your approval," Ichigo said calmly. "Seriously, don't worry about it. Chill."

"But Captain Kuchiki is worrying about it," Renji insisted as they waited at a traffic intersection. "Him, Hisana, the old man Ginrei... you gotta get back to the Soul Society and take a more active role in your engagement. Like, now."

Ichigo grabbed at the air above Renji as though to hold a thin object.

Renji batted away Ichigo's arm. "What are you doing?!"

"Funny. You're clearly Byakuya's puppet, but I can't feel the strings," Ichigo said with a grin as the boys crossed the street. "Where are they?"

"Not funny, carrot-top," Renji snapped. "Man, you're as big a pain as ever. What does the Captain see in you?"

"Did Rukia send you too?" Ichigo asked. "Are you her spy?"

Renji's face fell. "No, but if she saw how stubborn you're being... I really think she'd be upset, Ichigo. She's your best friend. And mine. What's the matter with you?"

Ichigo sighed. "Nothing's wrong with me. How'd you like it if something this huge was dumped in your lap? I mean, a noble family in the Soul Society? I have a life here, too, you know. And a family. What am I supposed to do, give all this up?" Ichigo swept an arm around the scene.

Renji hesitated for a second. "Well..."

"Renji, I shouldn't have to say it, but Rukia does mean a lot to me. I owe her," Ichigo said, growing warm in the face. He thought of her jovial face, and his heart started to race. "She's an amazing girl, and I don't ever wanna lose her."

"Exactly," Renji said earnestly. "You're right for her, man. She's so excited about your engagement, and here you are, goofing off in the world of the living -"

"I'm not goofing off. It's high school, and my dad expects me to graduate."

Renji blinked at Ichigo's defensive tone. "Okay, point taken. Just... think it over, will you? See it from Rukia and Byakuya's perspective."

The Kurosaki Clinic drew near, and Ichigo sighed through his nose. "I'll... see what I can do," he said evasively. "Just don't go and tell Rukia that I'm trying to sabotage our engagement or our friendship. I'd never do that to her."

"Sure, sure." Renji summoned a senkaimon gate. "See you later." He stepped through.

Ichigo, meanwhile, finally relaxed in the comfort of his own home. It was quiet at this time of day, as gold-orange sunlight glowed through the windows. Come to think of it, Rukia did used to liven this place up...

*o*o*o*o*

"Sorry, Rukia, but it didn't really work," Renji said. He hung out in Squad 13's barracks in his regular Soul Reaper body, arms folded over his black-robed chest.

Rukia sighed. "Why is Ichigo such a stubborn dolt sometimes? I just don't get humans sometimes."

"Yeah, we and him are totally from different worlds," Renji commented. "Such is life."

Rukia brightened. "Speaking of which... that was actually a source of inspiration. Look at this!"

She ran off, and returned with tomorrow's edition of the Seireitei Bulletin. Renji took it, and scanned the newest story in it. "What the... you got published?!"

"Yeah!" Rukia beamed, hands clasped bashfully behind her back. "Momo and Nanao and I got Shuhei Hisagi to accept it for serialization, starting tomorrow! What do you think?"

Renji felt himself go as red as his hair. "It's, uh... pretty graphic!" He tried not to imagine what kind of erotic things that must have inspired this...

"Look, let the girls and I take care of the Kurosakis," Rukia declared, taking the newspaper back. She winked. "It's our turn, okay?"

Renji stared. "What does that mean?"

Rukia walked past him and gave him a playful punch on the shoulder on the way. "Stick around in Karakura Town, and you'll see!"