Disclaimer: I do not own Blindspot. More like it's the other way around… I've come to realize that THEY own ME. :)
Of course, because they were so focused on reaching the village, the day seemed to drag on and on. Jane found herself glancing up at the sun often, willing it to have moved across the sky and signaling the passage of time. However, the sun seemed determined not to cooperate, and if she didn't know better, she would have sworn that it wasn't moving at all. They didn't talk much as the morning slowly wore on, both of them thinking of only one thing – reaching their destination. It was hard to be sure just how much time they had lost on the way down the mountain, due to numerous setbacks, however, now that they had picked up speed, they wanted nothing more than to just get there already.
The sun was finally almost directly overhead when Kurt, knowing what Jane's reaction would be and bracing himself for it, suggested a break.
"Jane, let's stop for a few minutes," he suggested, tugging her gently to a stop with the arm around her waist as he slowed his steps. "We've been going full speed all morning." He hadn't bothered to look at his watch when they started, all he knew was that it had been early.
"I'm fine," she protested in annoyance. "I don't need to stop. Let's just get this over with." Their arms had dropped when he'd stopped and, unwilling to be completely separated, they were now holding hands. She was tugging at him right back, not wanting to take a break.
"We're not going to walk all day without at least taking a break," he protested, hoping that she would hear how crazy that sounded. Of course, he realized too late who he was talking to, and the fact that she would think nothing of walking all day without a break if it got her to her goal.
"So? It's not like we have anything left to eat – which is just another reason not to stop. So that we can get there sooner."
Seeing that she was not going to be easily convinced, he sighed and shook his head at her. This fierce determination of hers was both a strength and a weakness, depending on the situation. "Five minutes," he told her. "Call it a water break."
Rolling her eyes in annoyance, she finally agreed, and they sat down in the grass beside the path. Kurt took out one of their water bottles, handing it to her. Out of habit, she took only a sip before handing it back to him.
"More than that, Jane. We're not running out, remember?" he urged her gently.
"Oh, right. At least we still have water," she replied, a note of annoyance in her voice.
Kurt couldn't help but smile. He was hungry too, and while Jane was usually better at hiding her discomfort, she'd had so much to deal with in the past few days, past few months, it was a wonder she was as even-tempered as she was. Besides, he had a feeling that if she was with anyone else, she would have pretended to be perfectly fine. It was only with him, he suspected, that she let her guard down enough to show this flash of annoyance. After everything they'd been through, he was even grateful that she could snap at him, because it meant that she was there with him.
When she handed the water bottle back to him, he took the opportunity to take her hand as well, bringing it to his lips and kissing the back of it lightly. When she looked at him in surprise, he just smiled and said calmly, "We'll be there soon. I'm not sure exactly how long, but it should be today. Okay?"
The tightness in her features melted away then, as she realized that she had absolutely no right to take any of this out on him. On the contrary, she'd done this. She was the reason that he had had to come out here and bring her back. She thought these words without starting a spiral of guilt, for once – it was simply a fact. They were here because she had run here to get away from him. To protect him. End of story. She breathed in and out deliberately, pondering what Kurt had told her.
We're here now, and we're going home.
She repeated the words objectively in her head. When she didn't let herself use them against her, they were just a statement of fact. Remembering that she had yet to reply to him, she smiled apologetically and looked up into his eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered, squeezing his hand. "You're the last person in the world I should be taking things out on."
"And yet, I don't mind a bit," he said soothingly. "The situation isn't ideal. I know. You have every right to be grumpy."
Dammit, why does he have to be so… nice? I really am grumpy.
"That's not fair to you, though. I'm sorry." She realized only afterwards that she had apologized, not once but twice, but thought maybe he'd let it slide. After all, her bad mood was something for which she really should be sorry. Smiling up at him tiredly, she was surprised to see him beaming at her.
"I know you didn't want to stop," he told her empathetically. "And I know it's hard for you to let anyone take care of you. Thank you for humoring me. Are you ready to go?"
For a few seconds she blinked in surprise, smiling slowly as she processed his reaction. She didn't know how he was so calm and level-headed, but she had no complaints.
"I thought you'd never ask," she replied, and they stood up slowly and brushed themselves off. Jane had insisted on carrying her backpack that morning, and now she reached for it again. Kurt handed it over without a word.
"How are your feet?" he asked.
"Sore," she replied. "Didn't you hear? I've been walking down a mountain for the past few months."
He chuckled quietly, shaking his head. "But otherwise okay?" he asked.
"I've made it this far," she said with a smile. "And I can now tell you first hand that there's a big difference between sore and on fire. But I'm fine."
He looked at her uncertainly for a few long seconds. After all, she was prone to saying she was fine when she wasn't anywhere near fine, so it was hard to know if she was telling the truth. The exasperated smile on her face told him that she knew what he was thinking.
"Yes, really," she added, tugging him to a stop this time and turning towards him. Now standing on her toes so that they were almost at eye level with each other, she leaned forward to kiss him. It was an innocent kiss, simply to reassure him, and she leaned back just enough to be able to focus on his face. "I promise," she whispered.
His heart fluttered slightly in his chest as he smiled back at her. "I just want to make sure you're alright, Jane," he told her softly, his brow furrowing earnestly as he tucked a strand of hair that had blown into her face behind her ear.
"I know you do." She swallowed all of the other things that her mouth wanted to say – I'm sorry and I don't deserve you and any other similar words – and all the guilt that went along with them. It required her to grit her teeth to do it, but she managed, deciding that, like so many other things, it was a starting point. Getting rid of the thoughts would take longer, but that was to be expected. "I'm not trying to be difficult," she added, her muscles in her face tightening in frustration with herself and, to her dismay, the corners of her eyes stinging suspiciously.
"Sshhhh, hey… I know that," he assured her quickly, concerned by the sudden desperation he saw in her eyes. The hand that wasn't holding onto hers went to her cheek, and she leaned into it as she nodded, a faint smile on her face as she looked back at him. Feeling satisfied that they understood each other, the hand on her cheek dropped reluctantly, his other hand squeezing hers.
Just like that, calm flooded through her. It's amazing that he can have such an effect on me, she thought in wonder.
It's because you love him, silly, the voice in her head reminded her. Now feeling perfectly calm, her smile broadened slightly and they started walking again.
They were quiet again then, just walking side by side in the sunshine. The day was cooler than the others had been – it didn't feel hot, despite the fact that it was mid-day and the sun was almost directly overhead. It was the perfect weather for what they could pretend was a leisurely walk through a park, and not the end of the first leg of their long journey back. Yes, they were tired and hungry. On the other hand, coming on the heels of the past few months, the fact that they were there together was more than enough.
He was surprised at the pace Jane was able to maintain over the next few hours. They were making better time than they had since probably the first day. Every time they went came around a bend, or they became able to see just a little farther ahead, they looked out for anything ahead that might mean the village was near. Sadly, many hours later as the sun was already getting low in the sky, they had yet to see any signs of civilization. Jane was trying in vain to hide her disappointment, and her pace was now slower, though still determined.
She was pushing herself, but feeling like beginning to feel like they would never reach the village. Once again she wondered if they'd taken a wrong turn, even though there hadn't been any turns, and despite the fact that passing the stream had told them that they were on the right path. The idea of sleeping outside again – while not exactly unpleasant, because sleeping next to Kurt was, of course, the only place she wanted to be – made her push herself even harder. If they had to camp another night, they certainly could… but it was more about the attainment of their goal, of reaching that first milestone on the way home, so that they could move on to the second and the third, and eventually arrive back in New York.
Of course, once they got home they still had to find their friends, but they had to be home first. Trying not to think too hard about anything but that first goal, lest she feel overwhelmed by it all, she pushed herself harder. If there had been days more of walking ahead of them, she would have saved her strength. But because they were so close, she could exert herself a little more, if that was what it took to reach the village by nightfall.
Kurt knew what Jane was doing, and he couldn't say he blamed her. Of course, he wanted to get there, too, and he couldn't fault Jane for her frantic pace. He worried about her, however. That was only natural. He always had, and he always would, even more now than ever before. But he knew that as long as there was a single ray of light in the sky, there was nothing he could do to deter her from pushing herself as hard as she could if it meant they could reach the village that day – well, that night, now. And so he did as he had done for the past several days: he walked beside her and held onto her, by the hand that day, thinking how truly lucky they both were to have ended up there together, despite everything.
The last of the light was fading when they finally saw the faint shadows of small buildings in the distance. Kurt had been about to tell Jane that they needed to stop for the night, and he had really, really not been looking forward to having to say it. At almost exactly the same time, however, they both breathed in sharply as they saw what they had been hoping for all day, squeezing the other's hand.
"We made it," Jane breathed quietly as they quickened their pace. It would be best to get there before it was completely dark, after all, especially since they were strangers. After that they said nothing, simply put all their effort into getting to that village that grew larger much too slowly. They couldn't run, not with all of the gear between them. Kurt was carrying most of it, of course, and despite his strength, after four days of walking under less than ideal conditions and almost no food that day, he could only go so fast.
As they entered the small village, which consisted of a small group of houses and several other buildings whose uses weren't immediately obvious in the dark, they slowed to a walk, looking around. There was very little noise except the sounds of crickets, and only a few of the houses had any light coming from them. Both Jane and Kurt remembered this village from when they'd passed through on their way up the mountain, though obviously Kurt had been there much more recently.
"Any ideas where we start?" Kurt asked. "How were the people when…" He hesitated, since the question meant an allusion to a time that neither of them liked to think about. "…when you were here last?"
Jane was scanning the darkness, not wanting to look at him just then as she thought back to that time. When she hesitated, she felt him squeeze her hand in encouragement, a silent reminder that they were okay. "Shy," she whispered. "Wary, but maybe that just had to do with… how I look." She couldn't remember how many of her tattoos had been visible that day, but she didn't think she'd gone out of her way to cover them up. She did remember was getting strange looks from the villagers, but then that could just have been because she was foreign looking to them, even besides the tattoos. "Could have been the tattoos, or just my being white. But they were very kind to me."
He wished he could look into her eyes at that moment, but there was far from enough light for that. Besides, they were both looking around them carefully as they walked, staring into the dark for signs of life.
Just as Kurt was about to ask if she had any idea where to start, a door to their left creaked open slowly, letting a crack of light out into the darkness. The shape of a person that they couldn't see was silhouetted against the brightness behind it, and they froze, squinting towards the figure. It was unlikely that they would have to defend themselves, but their jobs had taught them that you couldn't be too careful.
An older man's voice rang out through the darkness in a language that Kurt didn't understand, but to which Jane replied almost immediately.
Of course she speaks the language, he thought with a relieved smile. Jane had bowed her head slightly toward the voice, then tugged Kurt along as she turned toward the man. He was slowly opening his door wider letting more light out little by little. Behind him, there were several other shadows, undoubtedly curious family members. He imagined that their arrival in the village, especially after dark, would be a subject of great interest.
The speech pattern he was hearing was so completely foreign to his ears – not like Spanish, where he might pick out a word or two – but Jane and the man seemed to be having a long conversation. From what he could tell, it seemed to be going well. The man was now beckoning them to come inside his small house. As they stepped inside and their eyes adjusted to the dim light given off by candles set in several strategic locations throughout the room, their eyes slowly adjusted to the light and the people who had been just silhouettes a few moments before suddenly had faces.
Kurt was wary of the strangers, feeling especially protective of Jane. He'd gone through too much to get her back to have anything happen to her. As he listened to the words that meant nothing to him, however, Kurt realized that the man who'd just invited them in was probably feeling just as cautious about these mysterious strangers, if not more so. The more the man and Jane talked, however, the more the man seemed at ease, glancing over at Kurt every minute or so, smiling more at him little by little.
"He's the elder in this village," Jane whispered to Kurt. "And he we were welcome to stay here tonight. We can put our things down here, for now." She pointed to a spot near the door, against the wall, next to which a neat collection of shoes was lined up. Jane had knelt down to untie her boots, and Kurt wondered how her feet would look after the day's hard walking and barely any breaks. Speaking of which, he wondered for her feet felt after that day's more strenuous pace. She hadn't complained once, and they'd been so focused on moving along, he'd neglected to even ask her. By the time he was removing his own boots, she was standing and looking at her feet, sighing quietly.
Jane was dismayed when she saw that her feet had not fared as well as they had the day before. The more extreme pace and the lack of all but the shortest of breaks had obviously taken their toll, because her socks, while not as stained as they had been two days before, were also not as clean as they had been the previous day. She hated for even Kurt to make a fuss over her, so when she looked up from where she sat on the floor and saw the older man looking down at her feet, and then calling for his wife to come back in from the next room, she felt very uncomfortable.
Kurt watched the village elder's reaction to Jane's slightly bloody socks with concern. He couldn't understand the man's words, but from his tone, he seemed to be very concerned with Jane's well-being. Just in case, he crouched down on the floor behind her again, one hand landing on each of her shoulders as he leaned toward her left ear. As he did, she turned slightly over her left shoulder towards him, bringing her face close to his.
"Everything okay?" he whispered, even though he was relatively sure they didn't understand him anyway.
"Well, it seems that you're not the only one to be concerned with the state of my feet," she said, smiling as she glanced back up at the older woman who had just appeared above her and was now kindly giving her instructions. Nodding at the woman, she turned back to Kurt and said, "They want to treat my feet first. Makes sense, they don't want me bleeding on their floor. They want me to sit up on that chair over there," she said, pointing across the room, "and then to soak my feet. Could you…" She paused, as if she hated to ask it of him. "Could you please lift me up to the chair?"
"Of course," he replied, surprised that she looked so flustered to ask something so simple of him. "I've been trying to carry you for days, if you recall. I only got a short chance to do it, and then we had to stop by the stream." He kissed her on the forehead as she shook her head at him, then lifted her up and carried her across the small room to the chair she had indicated. The older couple looked quite surprised, as did the two middle aged girls who walked into the room at that moment. When Kurt set her down gently, the four others in the room clucked at him, smiling and appearing impressed, though of course he didn't understand a word of it.
"You've just become Superman, I think," Jane told him with an appreciative smile. Kurt smiled back at Jane, and then awkwardly at the others, then looked back at her cautiously. Just because these people seemed friendly, that didn't mean he wasn't still suspicious when it came to just what exactly this woman was about to do to Jane's poor feet. One of the girls that was about their age had just brought the older woman a tub of water. Kurt stepped back, out of the way as the water was put down on the floor directly in front of Jane. The water wasn't exactly soapy looking, but it also wasn't clear. There was something in it, but since he didn't know what, he remained wary.
"Any idea what they're about to do to you?" he asked, a worried edge to his voice.
Jane shook her head at him, smiling from across the short distance that now separated them. "It's okay Kurt, they're not going to hurt me. These are good people. As soon as this is finished," she nodded at her feet, which were being submerged in the water, pleased to find that it was warm, "they're going to give us dinner."
At that moment, then older woman turned around from her work, looking up at Kurt towering above her. The expression on her face softened, and she smiled at him. Then, in a language he didn't understand, she began speaking to him, her tone friendly, then gesturing over towards Jane. Looking back up at his wife for assistance, Kurt saw Jane nod and smile at the woman, and then at him.
"She said, you don't have to worry, and that if you want to bring a chair from the next room and sit next to me, you are welcome to," Jane told him. Feeling slightly self-conscious to be the one person in the room who didn't understand what was going on, he just nodded, glancing at the older woman, who had already gone back to her work on Jane's feet, then ventured slowly into the next room to look for a chair. In less than a minute he was back with a chair, setting it down beside Jane carefully so that he did not interrupt the work that was happening in front of them.
"Don't look so worried, I'm fine," she told him with a grin, reaching over to take his hand. "This feels a hell of a lot better than walking on them did." Still, when she flinched a second later as the woman worked on an extra sensitive area of her left foot, Kurt squeezed her hand tighter at almost the same instant.
He nodded slowly, watching with a solemn expression as the woman did something to Jane's feet that he still couldn't quite understand. For some reason, even though he knew that this was probably for the best, it bothered him that it wasn't him taking care of her, but a stranger.
Jane's voice was in his ear again then, a few seconds later. "And you did a great job taking care of me and my stupid feet the past few days, by the way. I wasn't implying that you hadn't been," she added.
"Didn't quite have the water supply handy," he lamented jokingly, glancing up at her. "I'm assuming it's at least warm?"
"Very," Jane confirmed. "My feet are happy."
"Good," he said, squeezing her hand. "That's all I care about." After a second he added, "Well, and that the rest of you is happy, too." When Jane smiled at him once again, he felt the tension in him over what was happening to her begin to lessen.
The woman looked up then, giving Jane instructions of some kind and pointing into the tub of water, where the water was slightly pinkish now thanks to a few patches of raw skin not holding up as well as others. Jane just nodded, then said something Kurt didn't understand, smiling brightly at the woman. After the woman had dried her hands on a towel sitting on the floor nearby and then stood up and left the room, appearing to tell them to stay put, if Kurt had to guess, Jane leaned over to him to translate.
"As you can probably guess, she's done for now. She wanted me to soak my feet a little longer, while she heats up some food for us. I told her how long it's been since we had more than a little bit to eat, so I'm sure she'll go overboard." Watching his face light up at the thought of food, she couldn't help but smile brightly herself. Suddenly feeling the tiredness that she'd been denying all day, she leaned her head down on his shoulder and stifled a yawn. Almost as if it was an automatic reaction to her head touching that spot, he turned without thinking and kissed the top of her head, then watched a smile erupt on Jane's face.
"I'm kind of tired," she admitted quietly, settling against him and suddenly feeling very drowsy.
"Hey, don't go to sleep here, with your feet in a tub of water," he teased her tiredly. He picked up her left hand, which he was already holding in his right, pulling it to sit on his right leg and now clasping it between both of his hands.
"I'll just rest my eyes for a minute," she said, feeling them closing involuntarily anyway. Doing her best to stay awake, she focused on the sensation of her hand between both of his, and his voice murmuring not far from her ear.
"I hate to tell you not to go to sleep, because I know how badly you need it, sweetheart. But I also know how much you won't want to wake up, and that you need to eat. Not only that, and maybe this is selfish of me, but I do not speak the language here, so if you fall asleep, I have a major communication problem."
Her eyes were still closed, but she laughed gently at his words. It was true. Kurt had many hidden talents, but foreign languages were not one of them. But her ease with languages made up for it, just another reason why they made such a perfect team.
Just then the floor creaked in the doorway, and one of the younger women appeared, smiling apologetically. "Please," she said in heavily accented English. "Come. Eat."
"Well I understood that," Kurt murmured. "Come on, Jane. Let's get you some food and then I promise, we'll sleep. Okay?" He felt her nod against his shoulder, and he turned very slowly since her head still leaned heavily on him. Move he did, however, and she picked up her head, turning to smile and say a few words to the young woman who was standing and watching them.
Jane had had every intention of standing up, and she'd pulled her feet out of the tub of water and set them to dry on the towel that sat beside the container in front of her, pausing there for just a few seconds. Before she could do anything else, however, Kurt leaned down and folded the towel over to pat her feet dry, then stood up and, before she knew what he was doing, had picked her up yet again.
"Don't fall asleep on me this time," he instructed her playfully. "We're only walking to the kitchen."
"Very funny," she replied, narrowing her eyes and pretending that she was not at all amused with him, though she couldn't hide her smile.
The young woman who'd been waiting for them in the doorway smiled nervously, looking down shyly, and then motioned them to follow her into what, it turned out, was the kitchen. There was a fireplace on the far wall, and a small table and four chairs in the middle of the room. The fire looked like it had been stocked with new firewood recently, and it was giving off a warmth that Jane hadn't even realized she needed. The older woman began chatting happily when she saw them come in, and pointed to the food that was already sitting in the middle of the table, along with a few small, white candles that provided additional light for the room in addition to what came from the fire. Kurt set Jane down on the chair closest to the fire, then sat down beside her. After their continued closeness the past few days, sitting on a separate sides of the square table made him feel like he was miles away from her.
The two elders, the parents of the middle aged girls, Kurt guessed, sat down at the table with them, and the woman passed Kurt a bowl of what he would have described as looking like "Chinese food," looking at it and, if he guessed correctly, urging him to eat. "Thank you," he said awkwardly, which Jane translated. He attempted to repeat the phrase that Jane had used, but when the other three people at the table, as well as the two daughters standing off to one side, all chuckled at his attempt, he got the feeling that he'd said it wrong.
Jane gave him the most endearing smile, nodding at him. "That was a really good try," she told him, and he huffed slightly, trying not to feel self-conscious.
"Have some of this," he told her, holding the bowl out in her direction.
The look on his face was just as serious as it had been when he'd told her to eat the dumplings their first day on the mountain. For a second she could see it clearly in her mind all over again. She'd been uncomfortable and still so emotional, and hadn't wanted to eat anything, but Kurt had insisted. This time, however, that stern look made her feel warm inside, and reminded her just how serious he was about taking care of her – as if she could ever have forgotten. She spooned a dish that looked like noodles and meat onto the plate in front of her, thinking that it might be the most delicious smelling food in the world. Not wanting to offend her husband, however, who had, in fact, cooked many delicious meals for her over the last few years, she decided not to say that. Besides, it probably had something to do with how long it had been since they'd had a real plate of food – neither of them could remember when that had last been for them, but it was far more than four days.
"Thank you," she whispered when she was finished serving herself. "May I hold it for you?" He nodded slightly and handed her the bowl, which she held while he heaped food onto his own plate. By now the smell had worked her stomach into a frenzy, and there was an audible growl from its direction. It was none too soon when he took the bowl back from her and set it down, as the older couple and their daughters watched the two guests eating hungrily. They seemed genuinely pleased with their guests' reaction.
In between bites, Jane conversed with their hosts. Kurt, of course, was quickly getting used to the conversation going over his head, but he was more than happy to focus on eating, anyway. Jane had been talking to them for so long that he had finished his food, feeling completely satisfied, while she was only three-quarters of the way done with the much smaller portion that she had served herself. After how little they'd eaten the past few days, he was surprised that she didn't seem hungrier. Wondering if she had returned to old, bad habits, not eating consistently being one of them, he watched her for a minute, resolving to himself to once again ensure that she was eating regular meals, not just tiny intermittent snacks.
Having finished, and tuning out of the conversation in the room because he had no hope of understanding, he felt himself getting very sleepy. When he heard Jane finally addressing him, in English, it was almost a surprise, his thoughts snapping back to the present.
"Ready for bed?" she asked. Jane was turned slightly away from him, towards her other side, and one of the two girls was kneeling by her feet, wrapping one and then the other in what looked like some kind of bandages.
"More than ready," he assured her. "Where are we going?"
"Well, both of the daughters were arguing over who would have the honor of giving up their bed for us," Jane said with a smile, glancing at the two younger family members. "But I think that dilemma has been solved. They are going to share, and we are going to get one of their beds. And don't think I can talk them out of it. I tried. They were not receptive to the idea of our sleeping in the sleeping bag on the floor."
"I will not argue," Kurt said with a sleepy nod of his head. "I'm going to be sleeping in this chair if we don't get to bed in the next few minutes."
Jane said something to the others, and everyone stood wearily, Jane on her aching feet with the new bandages. Kurt followed along as the party walked back toward the front door. "We're just collecting our things, and they'll show us where to go," Jane narrated as Kurt walked behind her, his hands on her shoulders. Whether it was to steady him, to steady her, or both of them, or just because he'd already missed having contact with her, it didn't matter. Their backpacks once again strapped on loosely, they followed the small parade down a dark, narrow hallway to the room of the girl who had insisted on won the right to have the visitors sleep in her bed.
The two girls then bowed slightly and said a few words to the group, some of which he heard echoed back to them, so he assumed that they were some form of "Good night." After that, the two sisters made their way to the next doorway on the same side of the hall, disappearing inside.
Now only the parents stood in the hall with them, pushing the door open to reveal the small room that Jane and Kurt were being offered for the night. There wasn't much – a narrow bed, a chair, and a chest on which there sat a thick white pillar candle, burned about halfway down. The candle was giving off the only light in the room.
Jane exchanged a few more words with the couple before they bowed slightly and also retreated down the dark hall, leaving her alone with Kurt. Inside the room, they set down their things in the corner. "The bathroom," Jane informed him, "is across the hall. She was describing the facilities and it sounded… well, it's basically one step above outside."
"Well then, we've moving up. One step up is one step up. That's the right direction," Kurt replied. "You go first."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"Of course," he said, yawning loud and long as she raised her eyebrows at him. "Now hurry up so I can have a turn before I pass out." Shaking her head at him, she rummaged through their things until she found both toothbrushes and their toothpaste and headed across the hall, leaving the door open to light her way.
Kurt sat down on the bed, his elbows balanced on his knees as he ran his hands over his face. It hadn't just been a long day or a long week, or even a long month. It had been an eternity since the last time he'd allowed himself to stop and breathe like this, and since he'd felt that everything was right with the world. He'd been so exhausted for so long, he'd forgotten what it felt like not to feel exhausted. Even the last few days, since he'd found Jane, their trek down the mountain had felt like a frantic rush to take her away from the place that she'd run to. Sitting here, in this tiny house at the very edge of the end of the Earth… he could at least mentally prepare himself for what was to come.
Of course, their trek back to New York was far from over, but somehow it felt like getting this far, of coming out of the wilderness literally, and maybe figuratively as well, gave him the first real chance he'd gotten to believe that his nightmare could really be over. It would be a long time before the doubts that had plagued him for so many months without Jane would go away, he knew, but those would be easier to deal with now that he didn't have to get by without her.
"Next," she said softly from the doorway. He looked up from where he sat, and saw her walking toward him slowly, the flickering of the dim candlelight making her look even more beautiful than usual. Standing up wearily, he took a step forward and met her in the middle of the small room.
"You okay?" he mumbled, feeling tiredness taking over his brain.
"Better now," she said sleepily, her arms winding around him without a second thought. "But you go get ready. I'll be here."
"Will you be awake?" he asked, yawning again.
"No promises," she replied. "Depends how long you take."
He chuckled at her, nodding tiredly. "As long as you're here… that's all that matters." His arms had instinctively encircled her, as well, and for a few seconds they simply clung to each other with a combination of exhaustion and love.
"Go, before you fall over," she murmured in his ear. "So you can make it back before you pass out." She let go of him reluctantly, moving only far enough away that she could look into his eyes. After staring into them for a moment, her eyes closed and she leaned her forehead against his nose, suddenly craving more contact that just her arms around him and his around her.
Make it back. Her voice echoed over time and space as he remembered. So long ago, in a country far away. And he had. She had. Both of them had, often miraculously, over and over again.
"I love you," he whispered, thinking just then that he couldn't possibly ever tell her that enough to express just how much.
"I know you do. I love you too, silly," she told him, leaning back farther this time to force him to loosen his grasp on her. "Now go and get ready so that you can come and share this tiny bed with me."
"I like the sound of that," he whispered, attempting to wink, but too tired to accomplish it and just laughing at himself instead. "I'll be right back."
When he disappeared through the door, she turned around slowly to get ready to climb into bed. Every cell in her body was exhausted, but her heart was bursting with happiness. She remembered this feeling. It had started the night that she'd told Kurt that she loved him, in the hall outside his – now their – apartment. Everything had been so dazzlingly perfect… until she'd let her mind convince her that she couldn't have it, that it wasn't hers.
This doesn't belong to you.
She heard Remi's icy voice from the long ago dream that had started out so sweet and ended up in some sort of cage match between the two halves of herself. And yet… Kurt's face immediately popped into her head, and Remi's voice simply faded away.
Yes, this life does belong to me. It's not up to you, Remi. I'm sorry that you had the life that you did. It wasn't your fault… But that's over. You're not going to take me back there. Never again.
She was surprised at the certainty of her thoughts, and she couldn't help but smile as she thought of how proud of her Kurt would be when she told him what had just happened. Because she would tell him. Unlike last time, she wasn't going to let anything spoil her happiness.
A/N: Nope, it's not over yet… but it won't be long.
