Pre-Comment: [Insert Typical Lengthy Writer QQ and General Other QQ Here.]
Okay, so anyway, I'm starting to get really bored with this and with my stupid humour that's really, really rampant throughout this story. In order to fix that, I'm going to go photoshopping just about everything I see until my head explodes. This means I'm putting this story on a haitus. No, I mean a 'haitus.' But I guess it's really 'haitme' since there's no 'us.'
Thanks for your misunderstanding and unwilling cooperation--and for all the jokes from the last chapter.
Chapter Seven: Some Call her Lilith
Inspecting the polished mahogany surface for any imperfections, Lelouch let out a breath of relief. Placing the back of his black, silk-gloved hand across his warm forehead he turned to look out the window enviously. The sky was blue and nearly cloudless. It was the kind of day he'd rather spend sleeping in—not polishing floors, banisters, tables, and everything that could turn into a mirror with enough polish and elbow grease.
Ugh.
Housework.
That was a wi—
You know, let's just not go there.
Moving along to the next room, Lelouch felt his shoulders fall of their own accord, looking at the ominous task set before him: Organization. Piles of books were lying everywhere casually. Some were opened. Some had bookmarks placed neatly in them. Others were stacked in piles that resembled Jenga way too much in a don't-touch-me-or-you'll-be-sorry kind of way.
And then there was that small, whining meow from behind him caused his eyebrow to twitch.
Lelouch slowly turned around, for fear of assault.
It was still there.
Like it had been for the entire morning—following him like a meowing evil shadow.
Swallowing, he turned back around and back at the books on the floor.
He sighed.
His life had hit rock bottom.
No really, it had.
Making his way around the piles on the floor, he easily saw the five stacks of books that needed organizing onto the shelves—marked out with blue Post-It notes on the topmost book. Peeling the empty note off, Lelouch started with the first pile, then the second and finally the rest, taking his time and occasionally reading a few of the more interesting books.
He wasn't told anything about not slacking off and he was pretty sure Sayoko did it often.
No one could possibly be that diligent.
The sun was starting to make its way slowly into the western horizon and the nearby clock told him it was nearly time to prepare for dinner, and so he headed to the kitchen.
Another blue Post-It note on the otherwise flawless fridge detailed out what was to be made for dinner tonight. 'Noodles' was scrawled elegantly in Sayoko's neat, crisp cursive.
He turned to the cat who sat there, looking up at him expectantly.
"Shoo." Lelouch moved to nudge it with his foot when it stood up and he shrieked slightly, withdrawing it.
(It would be good to mention Nunally's cat, Angel, had given him more than just a few scratches, including an unnatural aversion to cats just outside the legal diagnosis of a phobia.)
The cat sat back down and Lelouch grumbled, determined not to get on this cat's bad side and exhibit his appealing scratching post qualities; qualities Angel had exploited to the fullest extent of her very, very sharp claws and evil fickle nature.
He was hoping Arthur—Suzaku's cat—wasn't having the same ideas.
"Fine. Stay there, just don't come near me."
Lelouch turned towards the task at hand. He had made noodles before. CC liked his home-made pizza better, but she would still always compliment his cooking thoroughly, honestly, and affectionately whenever he did. He knew he had to cook every once in a while otherwise she would die of malnourishment from Pizza Hut and he'd have that weigh on his conscience for the rest of his life.
Inside the fridge were the noodles as well as condiments and other raw ingredients for food. Lelouch's eyes lit up at the salmon still sealed in its packaging. He poked it slightly. It was fresh.
After frying up the noodles, he smoked the fish. Just as he was about to flip the noodles, something warm and fuzzy wrapped itself around his leg and Lelouch jumped—thus making the pan do the same, causing the oil to bounce and burn his skin.
Hissing, he pulled his burnt fingers it into his mouth before running cold water at the fountain into a basin and dipping his hand in to soothe the burn.
"Wow."
Lelouch pulled a face and didn't need to look to know who was there.
Probably smirking.
That ass.
While Lelouch really didn't want to know what provoked a 'wow' response from him, regardless of warnings regarding cats and their damned curios—
"Wow what?"
He grinned. "Arthur really likes you. He's usually only friendly to girls. Everyone else is a scratching post."
If you listened really closely you could hear the last dredges of Lelouch's claim to masculinity flush down the drain.
Well wasn't that just wonderful?
Just fantastic.
It just couldn't possibly be better: He was being stalked by a cat, pretending to be gay for money, getting sexually harassed every six minutes, had been roped into doing this, and was now effeminate enough to fool animals.
Life was grand.
Lelouch turned back to the food with carefully hidden death threats murmured under his breath as he added salt and pepper to the food, while one useless hand soaked in a bucket of cold water he filled.
"Is there something you want?" he asked irritably, pulling his hand out of the water to flip the food in the pan.
Arms circled around him and he felt something tug at the fake tail he wore.
His face turned a brilliant shade of scarlet.
Because he had started forming an allergic reaction to Suzaku's touch and it was rising to his cheeks. While he hadn't thought about it, the reaction had probably manifested to replace his suppressed defence mechanism against degenerates like Suzaku.
It itched ridiculously.
The kind of itch that made you want to scrub yourself clean with iron wool and strong cleaning detergent—of the strong variety that had at least eight steps telling you how to upchuck it if ingested.
Lelouch wanted to go home.
And then there was always that little voice in his head that would then say: 'But the money! The money! You didn't suck up being a princess this long for nothing!'
And that was the end of his lapse of homesickness.
"I want dinner," was cooed softly in his ear, licking it.
But still, there were some actions that continued to cross lines.
Lelouch jumped again and cursed as oil splashed on his arm (he had taken the silk gloves off as a fire hazard).
Suzaku snatched up his hand and placed his tongue against Lelouch's forearm where the oil splattered.
A chill of mortification ran up Lelouch's spine as his rash spread before he snatched his arm back away from Suzaku—resisting the urge to tear away at his skin until it bled.
"You'll have to wait," he said briskly, flipping the noodles as if he hadn't just been sexually harassed. Again. "It's almost done."
With a dramatic sigh, Suzaku leaned away from him, heading back towards the kitchen entrance. "Fine. By the way, you look good in that outfit—especially with those ears and that foxy tail."
Suzaku left in time to avoid the potential hazard of the knife now sticking out of the wall on a horizontal angle where his head once was.
Lelouch growled, cursing his internal sense of fair play and paying back debts, as well as his weakness to looks which should be banned.
Naturally, Kallen was to blame for all this as he thought back to last night and flipped the noodles again.
While Suzaku and Lelouch (Lelouch reluctantly) followed Kallen out onto the rooftop of the building, Lelouch had been praying to every god and deity he had ever heard about (including a few he had made up on the spot). He had promised he would do whatever penance (a promise he later regretted) it took only if he could survive this life-threatening encounter with a crazy ex-wife.
(None of that, ironically enough, carried even a hint of remorse of any kind for stealing Kallen's money.)
When Kallen stopped walking, Lelouch started fidgeting slightly and considering possible methods of escape from—possibly two—murderous psychopaths.
(Lelouch, you lied to me? How could you? I confessed and everything!)
(Suzaku, you hold him, I'll punch. After ten we'll switch.)
It was a rather unpleasant thought.
Lelouch wondered why he was walking out here willingly instead of running away, because this probably wasn't going to end well for him.
Escape routes sounded really good right about now.
These escape routes included, but were not limited to: Jumping off the edge of the building, faking a heart attack, and screaming fire as loudly as possible (which was a questionable tactic seeing as how the fire exits were closest to the crowd of people still inside, and those around him would easily see through it).
"What's wrong, Kallen? Tell me." Suzaku asked, first breaking the silence.
When Kallen turned around, she did just that.
It was long.
It was epic.
It felt like she was stabbing him over and over again with words alone.
It was unpleasant.
Lelouch made a mental note that Kallen had the memory of an elephant because she had even brought up the Cooler Incident.
(An event which, of course, comes with the cursory—)
Don't ask.
There was a long moment of silence where: Kallen just stood there—red-faced and ready to dish out some serious hurt—Suzaku looked like he might crack and do the same at any given moment, and Lelouch really started going over 'I'm too young to die' thoughts in his head.
What happened next he never would've expected.
Slowly, slowly, painfully slowly, Suzaku folded his arms. And then he sighed. And then he—
"So what?"
Kallen's mouth dropped open in shock.
Yeah, hers wasn't the only one.
"So what!? So what!? What do you mean so what!?" she shrieked, sheer anger colouring her face an unattractive shade of cherry red.
Lelouch didn't like the look in her eyes. At all.
And he was pretty sure they were blue, not that orangey, evil-looking colour they were glowing.
She advanced forward and Lelouch yelped, jumping behind Suzaku for cover. Kallen wound her fist back and—
"I'll tell you so what! I'm going to pound that damn little pretty boy's—"
"Sorry, my dear, but you won't be hitting his pretty face today."
—widened her eyes as it smacked uselessly against Suzaku's palm.
Kallen looked livid.
And that was like saying Armageddon was coming.
She swung with her other hand.
And it was blocked easily with Suzaku's other arm, twisting to grip her forearm disarmingly.
Blinking in confusion, she growled (in an impressively feral sort of way, Lelouch had presence of mind to not add vocally) and tugged at her restraints, to free her weapons from Suzaku's grip. Lelouch watched the events unfold before him with a surprised sort of awe and the revelation that Suzaku made a pretty good shield against things (or pissed off, crazy ex-wives) intent on killing him.
"Why are you protecting that asshole!?" Kallen screeched furiously, unable to do anything else, continuing to try and free her hands. Kallen didn't like feeling helpless, and having the ability to maim and destroy taken away from her wasn't helping. "He's a jerk! An idiot! A traitor! A… A… Why are you protecting him!?"
Suzaku merely smiled patiently and understandingly until Kallen was spent from yelling obscenity after obscenity that was illegal in some states and just a few countries.
"Why…?" she gasped, shoulders slumping in defeat.
"Because I love him," he replied calmly once the storm had spent itself.
And that shocked everyone.
(Even though it was the second time Lelouch heard it aside from a few moments ago.)
Kallen blinked. Her eyebrows knit together helplessly. "You what?"
Suzaku's voice was calm and steady, "You heard me. You might have been my first kiss and first crush—" Oh, so that was their connection. "—but he's my first love."
The only thing you could hear up on the roof for a while was the blowing wind.
"Really?" Kallen whispered as Suzaku let go of her hands. They dropped uselessly to her sides as Suzaku nodded.
Slowly, Suzaku stepped aside, and Lelouch's eyes widened, wondering if he had been sentenced to death after all. Whatever the reason, Lelouch realized he was now alone in this. Kallen stepped forward and wound her hand back.
"Kallen, please, don't be hasty—"
CRACK.
The acute sensation of pain spread out heatedly across his face as he was suddenly looking somewhere to his right.
It hurt just as much as last time.
And then hands cupped his face and he was pulled into a gentle kiss. His eyes widened and Lelouch found his face connected to Kallen's as she kissed him. A deer-in-the-headlights sensation overtook him by storm.
Softly, she whispered, "I still love you, Lelouch Lamperouge—even though you're such a stupid, stupid, BEEP, BEEP—" (It didn't take much to imagine a black censor bar across her mouth) "—BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, stupid douche," she said in an angrier tone, smacking him against the head again—albeit lighter. "I can't help but still love you."
Face still stinging from the earlier slap, Lelouch winced. "I'm sorry, Kallen."
Kallen's shoulders slumped. "I know you are. You always are. You're such a jerk to me, but I still love you. It makes me wonder if I'm the idiot."
Smiling softly at her, Lelouch touched a hand gently to her cheek, brushing away the tears slipping down her cheeks.
Suzaku made a point by clearing his throat.
Shaking her head, Kallen stepped back, wiping her eyes. Turning back to Suzaku, Kallen let out a long sigh and threw her head back to stare at the inky night sky before smiling.
"Take care of this idiot, Suzaku—he may be an ass sometimes…" Kallen smiled, turning back to Lelouch. "But I think he's still worth it."
Suzaku smiled. "I'll keep that in mind."
Kallen started to walk away, stopping a few metres away. "Kururugi!" she suddenly yelled, commando-style.
Suzaku stiffened, standing at attention, looking like he was resisting the urge to salute.
"No one is allowed to make him cry but me; understand?"
Lelouch could see a shiver run down Suzaku's spine.
And all Lelouch could do was think: That's right, I dealt with that for a whole year PLUS marriage.
(Even if it was only a week.)
"I'll hunt you down and kill you otherwise," she finished, never losing that threatening tone from her voice.
"Y-Yes, Ma'am."
Wow.
He stuttered.
Lelouch took careful note: Kallen Stadtfeld vs. Suzaku Kururugi—Kallen wins.
On every day that ends in a 'Y.'
Only one thought ran through Lelouch's head at this:
Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now. Thank God she's on my side now.
And Kallen was gone.
Lelouch then found himself alone with Suzaku on the roof. A sense of overwhelming gratitude towards Suzaku bubbled in his chest. It felt strange. Lelouch wasn't the kind of person who thanked people for anything—usually because people had aversions to doing nice things for someone who had just duped them out of extravagant amounts of cash. (It was an unwelcome side effect of the job, but money was always a great pick-me-up cure for remorse over that.)
So, he turned to Suzaku with a genuine, awkward smile on his lips, "Tha—"
"Do you still want to break up?" Suzaku asked despondently, looking away—a look of hurt crossing his face.
Kicked Puppy Look Inc. All rights reserved.
And suddenly Lelouch felt like every bit the jerk Kallen knew him to be.
If he just dropped Suzaku now, he'd feel even worse since Suzaku had just defended him from the living embodiment of the apocalypse come early.
Not only that, but Suzaku l—that 'L' word—him.
And there was also the money telling him it was all smooth sailing from here.
Ugh.
He'd have to somehow deal with that.
Somehow.
Somehow.
The guilt of that copyrighted look was too much for him.
"I… maybe… I was too hasty with… that. I mean, for that, just now, I sort of… owe you… a favour, I guess."
Before he could say anything else, Suzaku crossed the distance between them and Lelouch ended up being hugged by Suzaku.
It was quick and Suzaku stepped back, looking him over appraisingly. Humming, he grinned.
Uh oh.
Lelouch didn't like the look in his eyes at all.
"Well then… about that favour; what are your measurements exactly?"
Right.
That was why he was now wearing a cat costume complete with ears and tail of matching colour. It was regular cotton but it clung to his skin like spandex in all the wrong ways and Lelouch was pretty damn sure it was a size smaller than it should be.
Lelouch growled again, walking over to retrieve the knife stuck in the wall.
He had always been very good with knives.
And he was reminded agonizingly of someone else who was very good with knives.
Wedging it out of the wall carefully, he examined the damage.
Sigh.
Sayoko wouldn't be happy about that hole there.
"Why didn't you tell me that a week ago? You ass! I'm already back in Britannia!"
Suzaku laughed. "Because you would've indefinitely killed him if I did. I know you, Kallen, don't deny it."
She huffed from the other end. "But still, this doesn't make me happy about the situation. You pulled it off really good too—I TOTALLY thought you were serious about that 'love' thing."
"The confession?"
"Yeah."
He scoffed. "That? That's nothing. You should've seen me when I was consolidating all the Sakuradite resources under my roof. My father was a politician, and my mother spent the latter years in her life talking to priggish company executives all day. Acting is in my blood."
And it was true.
Kallen giggled. "You had ME fooled, for sure. You think Milly saw through it?"
Suzaku shrugged, even though the gesture was lost on Kallen—Kallen being at least a thousand miles away in another country. "I don't know. Maybe. I never know what goes on in that head of hers."
"Why go through all that trouble? To keep him around, I mean. It doesn't make sense."
"Well, here's how I see it: Japan will eventually get used to the fact that I am no longer single—or straight—and the girls will have to all just give up on me. It's only been, what, two-ish months? If I end this stupid thing now I'll get even more junk mail with condolences and other people asking for his contact information and whatnot."
"That's kind of selfish, Suzaku. What about Lelouch? What if he falls for you?"
"Pfft. Do you really believe that?"
"I don't know. I'm just pointing it out as a possibility. How about you? What if YOU fall for HIM? He's got those girlish good looks covered after all."
Suzaku felt like throwing up.
Just a little.
"Why does everyone say that? Look, my mail isn't the only reason I'm keeping him around. He's pretty fun to humiliate—and it's pretty damn easy too."
"You're kind of a douche, too, Suzaku. Now that I think about it—sitting here listening to all this. He's not going to be happy when he learns that you were straight this whole time."
"What, are you defending him? Actually? After everything he's done to you."
"You're right, I shouldn't be. I'm just saying, Suzaku; karma has funny ways of getting back at people."
Suzaku frowned.
This wasn't what he had expected. He expected Kallen to be laughing with him, to be on his side. With her history with Lelouch he thought she would be taking amusement in all this instead of reprimanding him for his unlawful behaviour.
It was like a mother scolding her child.
It left him with an uncomfortable feeling.
What he was doing wasn't wrong.
Per se.
Whatever Lelouch was doing was wrong. He was the one who started this mess. Suzaku was just playing along for the hell of it.
"I don't see why you're so angry about this, Kallen. It's not like I'm causing any harm. Just having a little fun with him. That's all."
Kallen sighed and he imagined her frowning. "You stupid boy! Don't you ever think about anything at all? How would YOU feel if someone said 'I love you' like that and was faking it in the end? I know what it's like to be that person, Suzaku. Those are the kind of things you say only if you really mean it. You just might be more of an ass than he is."
There was a silence between them. Suzaku idly grabbed a pen and tapped it, feeling like he had just been sent to his room with no dinner.
Kallen was the first to break the silence, "Anyway, I have to get going, Suzaku. There's a meeting I'm already late for. I'm the CEO's daughter so I can get away with a lot, but missing it is out of the question."
"Alright, that's no problem," Suzaku acknowledged in a defeated tone.
Kallen had effectively killed his interest for humiliating Lelouch—who he had finally wheedled into wearing that purple cat costume with the discovery that Lelouch had a real exploitable weakness for that Kicked Puppy Look.
"By the way, I meant what I said back on the roof. You make him cry and I'll kill you."
"I'll remember that."
"Like I said, karma has a funny way of dealing with things. Bye, Suzaku."
"Yeah… I'll talk to you later, Kallen."
With the end of the phone conversation, Suzaku was left thinking about what she said. Kallen was the last person he expected to scold him over such a silly thing—especially after what the guy did to her. Shouldn't she be feeling some sort of triumph? Some sort of revenge? Passively at least? Even though she wasn't really the one exacting the revenge?
Although getting Kallen's revenge hadn't been Suzaku's intention with Lelouch, it happened as a result in a roundabout way.
It was an unsettling thought and Suzaku didn't know how to deal with it. Up to now he hadn't thought whether this was right or wrong. He had to concede Kallen's point though—he wouldn't appreciate someone saying things like that if they didn't mean it.
Wait.
Didn't Kaguya mention something about this before giving him advice?
Something about messing with Lelouch's heart and how that was wrong?
But Lelouch was doing the same so it was alright.
Right?
Right?
Suzaku groaned.
His rebuttal back then sounded so much better than it did now.
It felt like his guilty conscience was finally catching up to him.
He just wanted less mail. And entertainment.
Innocent enough, right?
Well, now that he was thinking about it, he supposed there was a third reason. What he didn't tell Kallen was that he also liked spending time with someone his own age for once, as opposed to thirty and forty-year-old men, since graduation. It was a nice change, one he especially didn't want to lose even if it meant pretending to be gay.
So when Lelouch said he wanted to end it, Suzaku started pounding on the panic button and pulled out the trump card, hoping it would work. He didn't even really know the reason why Lelouch wanted to end the faked relationship between them. Did he know Suzaku was actually straight? Did he run into some kind of trouble and need to go home?
More importantly, why did Lelouch cave to him wanting to keep it going?
Was it really just because he saved him from a homicidal maniac or was it—
Oh God.
Lelouch wasn't actually falling for him was he?
Somewhere in the back of his mind he could see and hear Kallen and Kaguya laughing their socks off.
(Kaguya was probably intent on taking pictures after.)
And then the dinner bell rang, shattering that image in his mind.
Loosening his tie, Suzaku pulled it off his collar, signalling the end of his personal work day and left it on the desk where he always did. Sayoko had always gone around at night collecting his various ties on the various desks he left them on—for he always found them neatly pressed, ironed, and back in his wardrobe within the day. It wasn't work without a tie for him, and consequently, it wasn't relaxation if it was with a tie.
So, when he opened the door to his smaller, personal dining room, seeing Lelouch wearing the outfit Sayoko had prepared for him tore a well-contained stitch in his side, Suzaku was very glad he wasn't wearing a tie.
Not only that, but seeing Lelouch thoroughly pissed while wearing it also made him forget all about his recent and sudden guilt trip.
It was also a good deal of reassurance to see so much hatred built up on Lelouch's face that Lelouch was not in love with him.
Very reassuring indeed.
Lelouch stood beside his chair, positively glaring death from those violet orbs of violent intent. The silver tray he had brought the meal in on was held conservatively in front of his lap with both gloved hands.
When Suzaku sat down without a word, he slipped in a tug at Lelouch's tail and enjoyed the small shriek of protest from Lelouch as he reflexively took a step away.
Unable to do otherwise, Suzaku laughed. "I really could get used to this. Waking up every morning seeing you dressed like that serving me breakfast in bed. Won't you marry me, sweetheart?"
A hiss of anger bubbled at the back of Lelouch's throat and didn't go unnoticed as Suzaku started eating, fanning out the paper next to his meal for his perusal.
Clearing his throat, Lelouch pulled out a piece of folded paper he had tucked away in a silk glove.
"I've finished arranging the library, polishing the banister, organizing the file room, and everything else Miss Sayoko gave me instructions to do. Including everything you asked me to do this morning."
"Okay," he acknowledged, making a mental note to harass Lelouch about his home-making skills later on in the relationship.
His cooking really was good.
Lelouch blinked and a dainty frown of disapproval pursed his lips.
"You're… not going to check it over? See if I did it right?"
Suzaku didn't even look at him.
No doubt Lelouch wouldn't have done as thorough a job as Sayoko possibly could, but he didn't really care right now in light of other amusements—like making Lelouch as uncomfortable as he humanly and possibly could.
"No," he deadpanned, returning to the news that was no longer centered around him and dissecting his love life.
Anger and confusion of a sort furrowed Lelouch's brow as he frowned. "Then why did you tell me to do all that useless stuff this morning?"
Sitting back, Suzaku tapped his chin in thought for a moment—pretending to think it over.
And then he smiled as candidly as was possible.
"Because I wanted to."
Which was a nicer way to say: I Did it For the Lulz.
Lelouch growled and Suzaku was—"You stupid ass!"—caught off-guard as Lelouch lunged for him with intents to kill.
"No, definitely the purple one," she pointed out, tapping the image on the magazine being held out to her.
"Of course. And what about that issue with—"
"Don't mention that name to me, Jeremiah; you know what I think about that."
Jeremiah nodded in silence respectfully. "So, Miss, what has brought us to Japan? You were quite vague about the reasons… and still very much distressed."
Sighing, she slumped her shoulders dramatically in despair, placing fingers delicately on her temple. The other hand was held bracingly over her heart—as if it might give out at any moment. "My darling Lelouch is in desperate need of my love."
Jeremiah blinked as he seemed to think for a bit. Understanding broke the cloud of confusion misting over his eyes. "Ah, Lelouch. A fine boy. What makes you say that?"
Another dramatic sigh. "He's gone astray and run off with a slattern on me. I am quite distressed over it, Jeremiah."
Jeremiah blinked. "Miss, are you sure? Lelouch isn't the type of—"
The crack of newspaper unfolding the front page of a recent issue was fanned out in front of him.
'Sakura Group Leader Kururugi's New Love-Love Toy!'
She appreciated the way Jeremiah's eyes widened instantly.
He took the newspaper from her and inspected the image closer.
"Miss, this could be any—"
"I recognize that delicate frame better than anyone, Jeremiah. I have cuddled with that boy at night more than anyone else has growing up."
Fact.
"That is definitely my darling Lelouch." She slapped the page with the back of her hand. "Look at how far he's gone astray! My poor Lelouch is starved for affection if this—" she backhanded the paper again "—is where he's getting it. I'll not allow him to eat out of dumpsters any longer for love. I plan to marry him after all. He's my beloved! My one and only!"
Jeremiah swallowed and knew better than to point out the impossibility of just one of those latter declarations.
A delicate line had been trespassed on—he realized that now. A line that separated regular love and a complex that put all other complexes to shame—with the added benefit of the denial of its existence (Really? That's a benefit?).
Tentatively, he named it a Lelouch Complex.
"So, where to first, Miss?"
"Have you brought my shotgun, Jeremiah?"
Jeremiah hesitated. "Er… firearms are illegal in Japan, Miss. And they wouldn't have let it onto the plane since that—"
"No matter. We shall pay my darling a visit first then; after retrieving my knives from the house."
CC lay on her back, reading the letter over again—for the umpteenth time. Pensively, she thought on it as she reached for another slice of warm pizza. Chewing thoughtfully, she perused the letter again—trying to make sense of it.
By now she had the legible parts committed to memory.
The letter had been written neatly, precisely, and primly in the beginning before it degenerated into literature of ill-contained rage and a few well-placed threats indirectly towards an obvious someone not Lelouch.
There were even a few holes in it CC had questioned the origin of since the perpetrator was nowhere near.
Sticking her finger through the slits in the paper, one after the other, she assumed it was from a very sharp object.
It didn't take a rocket scientist to understand who those threats and all that anger was directed towards.
The individual had arrived in Japan surprisingly quickly in comparison to the date-time stamp on the letter. CC was curious as to how they did it. (Although she had no doubt it had something to do with why the suitcase was so heavy with not-safe-contents.)
And then there was the meeting of this individual just a little while ago.
CC smiled.
That was special.
Slowly, she started to sing quietly to herself, "Liar, liar, pants on fire; hanging from a telephone wire. Kissing fags, dressed in drag. 'Fess up now 'cause the pe-nal-ty's di-re~"
Suzaku had to give him some form of credit. For being so weak he sure had a lot of skill in cultivating his violent intent and adrenaline to make you think otherwise. It was impressive and reminded him that even the weakest of kittens had very, very sharp teeth.
Even so.
Kittens were still primarily cute and Lelouch was still very weak.
Lelouch was still pinned underneath Suzaku in more than just a compromising position—the result of at least thirty minutes of Lelouch venting all his pent up rage and frustration of the last (approximately) twenty-four hours. Suzaku appreciated the look suggesting mild arrhythmia on Lelouch's face after the realization sunk in that he couldn't fight Suzaku off him.
(It perhaps paled in comparison to the fact that he was now trapped under Suzaku with Suzaku resting comfortably between his legs.)
When Lelouch stopped panting, catching his breath, he struggled a bit more before finally giving up and declaring defeat as his body went lax.
"You win. Now get off me."
Suzaku grinned. He liked winning. "You sure? We could always take this back to the bedroom. It's a big bed."
Cue look of sheer terror.
"Suzaku Kururugi, if you—"
"If I what?" Suzaku challenged, tugging a little on Lelouch's tail again. It was long enough to allow him to tickle Lelouch's nose with it while the boy was more or less helpless to stop it with his arms pinned above his head. "There isn't anything you could do to stop me if I did."
Lelouch swallowed and glared at him threateningly. "You wouldn't—"
"Want to bet?" Suzaku cut in, feeling his alpha-male genes start to kick in as he descended on Lelouch's stricken face as violet dilated.
It was a little closer for comfort than Suzaku would've liked, but the look of panicked disgust, horror, and everything in between provoked Suzaku's sense of I'm-better-than-you more than he would've liked it to. There was just something about Lelouch that made Suzaku just want to… well, to win against him in every way imaginable. He couldn't really explain it and didn't feel the pressing need to either.
Besides, despite the sexually suggestive position, his mind reasoned that Lelouch was probably more horrified than him right now and that made it alright.
(Which was a backwards logic actually much more sound than it seemed for someone who grew up with literally no parents to teach him the merits of social limits, and what was right, and what was very, very wrong. It also didn't help that he had a cousin hell-bent on undoing any moral awareness his aunt or uncle taught him.)
(Which, in itself, was just a really big, fat, complicated excuse.)
Lelouch inhaled sharply.
"You wouldn't want to repeat what happened in the mall do you? Your lips were so soft after all."
It would be important to note that Suzaku Kururugi had absolutely no intention of actually repeating what happened in the mall that day—at all. (He was still trying to cope with the chill of disgust that churned in his stomach—soap is an unpleasant thing to eat he later found out (although he didn't regret eating it in the least).) But, like it was mentioned earlier, he was keenly aware of just how much more Lelouch was unwilling to do anything like that—and so that made this alright.
It was about the only thing that made this even remotely acceptable for Suzaku.
"Suzaku—"
"Yes?"
Suzaku felt just like those axe-murderers in the horror films. The feeling of control and knowing someone else was terrified spitless of him sent a thrill down his spine he never knew existed. All his life he had played the nice guy—simply because he had no reason not to. He had been terrified of others before, but no one had ever truly been scared witless of him.
It was kind of a satisfying feeling.
The very vocabulary-aware part of him spelled out the letters to a word that described people like this in his head in big fancy, bold lettering starting with an 'S.' They were the kind of people that were often put to jail because they didn't know how to put a lid on it.
Suzaku conveniently ignored all of that.
"G-Get—"
"I'd like to see you make me," Suzaku returned sharply, feeling every bit the knife pinning the butterfly down. Leaning closer over him, he grinned triumphantly. "Can you?" he whispered.
A look passed over Lelouch's face that clearly showed he was afraid of Suzaku right now.
It would be a good time to point out right now that Suzaku Kururugi has next to no social limiters that regular people do.
"Can't, can you? You couldn't even stop me if I—"
And then Lelouch did something Suzaku never would've expected.
He started bawling.
It was enough to bring him back to his senses.
Now he started to feel really guilty.
Maybe Kallen was onto something about this whole 'karma' business. Maybe this charade really had gone long enough. Maybe it really was time to end it.
Sighing, he backed off him a bit and felt his shoulders slump. "I'm sorry, Lelouch, I… didn't mean to… I should let you know that I'm not actually—"
BANG. BANG. BANG.
Suzaku turned to look at the entrance. A bit of dust fell from the rafters. It sounded like someone had taken a battering ram to the doors.
He frowned. Just who on earth would—
The door flew wide open on its hinges.
His eyes bulged. "That door was locked!"
Suzaku had only a second to think before he felt himself tackled to the ground (and off Lelouch) from the white-gloved hand seizing around his throat threateningly. The wind was knocked out of him and he had less than a second to see the sharp end of a knife coming down and close his eyes for impact.
THUNK.
Slowly, when he realized he was still alive, Suzaku opened his eyes, one by one, slowly.
A smiling demon stared down at him, inches away from his face. Satanic violet eyes flashed and he could see the reflection of sharpened steel in them—ridges, grooves, and all. One hand remained on his throat while the other stayed on the impressive-looking skinning knife (wait—skinning knife!?) against the side of his head.
She twisted the knife in the ground slightly and he felt the slight flat of the blade press against his head.
For the first time in his life, Suzaku Kururugi thought he might just die.
A grin slipped over her rouged lips. "It is very nice to meet you, Suzaku Kururugi. My name is Marianne vi Britannia. I am Lelouch's mother."
Comment:
I would call her Lilith.
Yeah, that 'haitme' thing--I was kidding. I'll see you somewhere next week. Hate me now, don't you?
I'm sorry (kind of, but not really), I just had to imagine your reaction to that. I'd actually really love to hear about it. I've always wanted to do something like that because I like messing with people.
Okay, so I covered animals, weird fruits, and a bunch of other interesting stuff. What kind of cake do you guys like? I like ice-cream cakes myself.
Please R&R. (Because it keeps me updating on a somewhat regular basis. And because it makes me happy.)
- Minute Maid
Beverage of Queens.
Oh, and whoever mentioned something about a bone lost in life… I need an address to send the hospital bill to, because that's where I ended up after the lack of oxygen from laughing so much started causing me brain damage. I'm mostly recovered, but I have to refrain from thinking about a 'bone lost in the way of life.'
No, I couldn't tell you why I think it's so funny. It just was and I just do. And, yeah, I do still find it funny.
