Pre-Comment: So I heard your begging, and I bring you this.
Enjoy Chapter Thirteen desperate readers!
Chapter Thirteen: It's Only Illegal in Some Places
"I have an announcement to make. But first, I'd like to thank everyone for their kindness and support for our relationship. You all have been very understanding of us, and both of us appreciate that very much. As many of you know, I am currently engaged to one Lelouch Lamperouge. We both—"
He paused to allow the applause and cheering die down.
"We both are very grateful to all of you for all you've done and said for us. However, we feel that it's only right to take things a little slower than they've been going. And so we have decided to delay the wedding that is fast approaching us and have it rescheduled to a later, unspecified, date. That is all."
There was a moment of sheer silence where even the ever-present clicking of cameras was missing.
And then the media instantly descended upon the stage like sharks, struggling to get closer upon the only source of the newest, juiciest piece of gossip news to hit all of Japan. (At least right now.)
"Mr Kururugi, does this delay have anything to do with—"
"—your feelings about his previous relationship—"
"—do you intend to do about Mr Lamperouge's—"
"—mean you feel threatened by the presence of—"
"—the end of your relationship with Lelouch Lamp—"
The announcement was then promptly switched back to the regular programming and the gossip news reporter covering the event as Suzaku gave a final wave and smile at the cameras before disappearing backstage.
"There you have it ladies and gentlemen. Suzaku Kururugi, CEO of Sakura Group, and Lelouch Lamperouge: An indefinite delay in the wedding plans. Could this be a sign of trouble in paradise? And does this have anything to do with the announcement made yesterday by Mao, an old flame of Mr Lamperouge's? Our guess is as good as yours. Back to you, Lenard."
The announcement had made CC pause from enjoying her piping hot, fresh, and fantastically free pepperoni pizza long enough to make the announcement important. After indulging in the rest of her slice and absorbing the following latest story that the gossip news station had to report, CC licked her fingers and hummed thoughtfully.
"Lelouch's not going to like this~"
After making the broadcast Suzaku returned home—and by home he meant office-home. Somehow, he managed to barricade himself in his room before his cousin could get her hands on him and nag him about what just happened (or cause him physical harm). For the next ten minutes, he had turned on loud music and flat-out ignored her until she unmistakably kicked the door and stormed off.
Clearly, when she said 'do something about it' after showing him the television broadcast, indeterminably postponing the wedding was not what she had in mind.
But inside the admitted teenage douchiness that was Suzaku Kururugi who started the whole thing in the first place, the man he had become had admitted a certain wrong had been committed—and needed fixing. Of at least some kind.
The entire charade was based on the solidifying assumption and (accurate) knowledge that Lelouch was straight. There were any number of arrows pointing to the fact that just washed away all of Suzaku's moral inhibitors. Now that it was undeniably revealed that Lelouch was, and is, of the homosexual orientation (even though he's not), Suzaku wouldn't be able to live with himself if he ruined someone else's life like this. Not that he would've married Lelouch anyway, but saying 'Haha it was all a joke!' when the other person isn't gay either somehow has lesser social and moral ramifications in his mind.
Even so, as Suzaku continued to work and go on with his life as if nothing happened (the every hour on the hour phone calls to Lelouch and hanging up right after 'hello' because his balls failed him every time notwithstanding), he couldn't help but feel the damage had already been done.
Suddenly, his intercom buzzed, "Sir, there's someone here to see you."
Suzaku's pulse raced, wondering if it was Lelouch, here to put the nail in the coffin.
Oh God.
He wasn't ready for this. He didn't know how to deal with a crying gay man. (And wasn't sure if he'd come out alive if his mother were to spontaneously show up to—
Happy place, Suzaku, happy place.)
Straightening himself out, Suzaku cleared his throat. "Uh, who is it?"
"Don't worry, Sir, it's not Mr Lamperouge," she reassured. And then a moment later, "Or Miss Marianne. Or Miss Sumeragi."
Sigh of relief goes here.
Note to self: Nina deserves a raise.
"Uh… then, who is it?"
"Miss Ashford is here to see you."
Well.
It was a touch better than the previous alternatives.
He cleared his throat for the longest time ever before, "Let her in."
Moments later, the doors to his office opened and in walked the bright and sunny Channel Six reporter. She didn't look condescending, or angry, or judgemental, or even anything other than her chipper self—which was reassuring since he had already gotten the rack from various other people for making the announcement and almost nothing Milly Ashford could do to him could make it worse.
The operative word in that sentence being almost.
"Suzaku!" she greeted energetically, sitting down on top of his desk.
Really.
He had other seats in his office for a reason.
"Milly! Pleasant surprise! What can I do for you?" he asked cordially, plastering his TV smile onto his face.
"Nothing really, just coming in to check up on you."
"Thanks then. Doing great."
"Really? I mean, I'm here for you if you want to talk about it. It's always rough figuring out what to do with ex-boy—"
"I don't—There's nothing to talk about," he corrected quickly.
She gave a disapproving frown. "Suzaku. Lelouch is really upset about this. You need to sort this out and talk with him."
"You talked with him?" Suzaku blurted out. "Is he—How is he taking it?"
"Well, I haven't talked with him. I don't know him all that well, after all. He was your beau. I did however speak with Gino—who spoke with Kallen—who talked to some girl named CC. And I hear he's pretty miserable about it."
Despite the game of telephone, Suzaku had no doubts about the veracity of this information.
He sighed, holding his face in his hands.
Milly looked away. "Suzaku, can I… ask why you did it? Delay the wedding. I mean… you looked so happy to—"
"I'm not gay."
The reporter blinked. "What?" she deadpanned, turning sideways so she could look at him better.
"I did it because I'm not gay. I never was. It was all just a joke."
Milly narrowed her eyes at him darkly with disapproval. "That's a really bad joke, Kururugi."
"I didn't—! Neither was he! Or he wasn't supposed to be! It was just supposed to be a really big prank."
"Whoa, whoa, slow down. What are you talking about? Start from the beginning."
Suzaku let out a long, frustrated breath. "First of all, I am not interested in men. Second, neither is Lelouch. Or at least he's not supposed to be."
Milly's eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What?"
"Yeah. I met him at a business mixer a couple months ago—it's a long story. But I figured he was just a gold-digger or something—you know, getting a little big-headed. So I decided to take him for a ride and see how long he could weather the storm."
"I see."
And, truthfully, she could since this was the type of behaviour she had subconsciously installed into each and every Student Council member during their days at Ashford. As a questionably (un)fortunate side-effect of her leadership skills.
Fantastic leadership skills, of course.
What her amazing leadership failed to promote was, however, reasonable (moral) limits.
"Yeah. And now I've found out that he actually is gay—and probably has been this entire time—and I'm not, and here we are about to get married—and his mother will—and I just—I panicked and I just—I had to do something to fix it."
"So you cancelled your wedding… to a man who was supposed to be straight… but isn't, to cut your losses."
"Yes."
"I see."
Silence.
And then—
"You're a real douche, Kururugi," she concluded sweetly, smiling.
Suzaku banged his head on his desk with a loud thump. "I know."
"Have you talked to him since the announcement? It's been a couple days now."
"I've tried. But I could never get past 'hello' and now he's stopped answering and CC says he doesn't want to talk to me. It's got to be pretty bad because she's not even making jokes about it."
Milly sighed. "How about I help you patch this out? Since you're so pitiful."
Suzaku raised his head, a red mark staining his forehead. "Really?"
Lelouch wasn't quite sure how to handle the sudden news (although his first reaction was to chase Mao around the house with various sharp objects intending bodily harm), or how Suzaku would call and then hang up suddenly before any words were spoken. This had been Lelouch's routine, more or less, every day for the past few days. Although he had only entertained Suzaku's case of chicken up until Wednesday before telling CC to just divert all of his calls in whatever way she wanted.
And then there was the issue of their rapidly decreasing money fund because, quite honestly, Japan was getting expensive just to be in, let alone live in. There was also the issue that certain red-haired devils—whoshallremainnameless—ruined the last big cash in at his disposal and Lelouch was quickly getting to the point where he was running on fumes and desperation.
As such, sensing his increasing distress over the situation, CC had taken it upon herself to go out and swindle some poor businessman into very near destitution and was thus gone since Monday. Although he didn't like the idea of CC 'working,' per se, because it was more dangerous for her than it was for him (at least most of the time), there was no a choice in the matter. They needed cash flow, and money from a certain someone's Swiss bank account was not forthcoming any time soon.
That and cheating would look bad.
Time away from Suzaku was giving him the precious opportunity to consider their financial situation, while at the same time causing the media to turn into ugly flesh-eating piranhas. Often, little snippets of their little excursions into the public would often be caught by some errant news reporter or such, confirming that all was well in paradise—misleading photos and conveniently angled shots and such. But with the latest bit of breaking news (for which Mao paid severely for after) and the complete disruption of communication between the two of them, things were getting understandably dicey.
Either way, he could feel this job swiftly running downhill and needed to do something about it.
KNOCK. KNOCK.
After he answered the door.
Spying through the peephole, wary of carnivorous media bottom-feeders, Lelouch instead was surprised to find that blonde, busty friend of Suzaku's he had met several times before. He vaguely remembered her being… nice… if a bit on the crazy, megalomaniacal and slightly perverted side. According to Channel Six and Suzaku, she was also a news reporter, but had graciously decided not to use her long-standing friendship with Suzaku to enrich her career.
For which Lelouch couldn't be sure if he was thankful for.
(Although he should, he really, really well and truly should.)
All the same, he wondered what she was doing here.
And so he opened the door to find out just that.
She smiled. "Hi, Lelouch!"
"Uh… Hi. Miss… Ashford was it? What can I do for you?"
"I'm just wondering if you know what chloroform smells like?"
Lelouch blinked.
Er.
Should he be worried?
"I… uh… no?"
Her face brightened. "Great!" And then she proceeded to dig around her bag to pull out a bottle and a white, non-descript cloth—like the kind in the movies. She opened the bottle, carefully held the rag against the opening, and tilted it slightly.
"What... what are you doing?"
"Oh, not much," she answered cheerfully, going about her work like it was normal to be soaking a rag with chloroform like she intended to use it. "Believe it or not, I've got a license to handle this stuff, so you don't have to worry about cardiac arrest or lung problems," she added conversationally, now putting the bottle away and folding the cloth over into a square.
Lelouch blinked prominently.
He wasn't quite sure what to make of it. But he was fairly certain nobody was quite bold or blatant enough to prepare a rag of chloroform in front of the person they planned to use it on. It went beyond the reasoning of a normal person.
Which was why he wasn't expecting the rag to cover his nose and mouth in a swift (and well-practiced?) motion while the other hand swung around the back of his head to prevent escape.
And before he blacked out, Lelouch made a (rather important) mental note to himself:
Milly Ashford is NOT a normal person.
To say that he was pleased with himself was probably an understatement. In the span of a few days, Mao had successfully thrown a secure relationship between two straight men (no, it still made no sense to him) on the rocks and escaped the wrath of certain individuals who surely intended him fatal, bodily harm.
Marianne had not contacted him about their 'arrangement' any further, and Mao could only assume that was a good thing. A very good thing.
And now, with the security of Lelouch's now-troubled relationship floating over the media waves—if CC's gossip and the news stations were to be believed—Mao decided it might be a good time to clinch the deal and do something only a straight man that feared for his life would ever consider doing to another man.
That is, go for the throat and make him fall in love.
Hopefully CC wouldn't mind.
He was sure that if he explained it nicely enough she would understand. It would probably make her laugh quite a bit and that would be that.
Because, you know, his love for CC was pretty eternal—written in the stars and all that.
And so, as he strode up the walkway to Lelouch and CC's temporary home, past the gate, and knocked on the door, he was somewhat surprised to see someone other than the only two occupants living here open the door with a cheerful—
"Hello!"
Mao blinked.
It was a girl.
And it wasn't CC.
And, the colour wheel be damned, that dress she wore looked horrible with her hair and eyes despite being the right tone. The overall effect had been far too complementary and made her look like Christmas several months too early.
But for some reason, Mao couldn't take his eyes off her.
"Um. Hello."
The girl tilted her head curiously, orange locks sweeping over her shoulder as her green eyes sparkled slightly—in the same way that the heroine's might when she meets the main character for the first time. "Can I help you?" she asked helpfully, in a perfectly tempered service-industry-worker voice that has learned to deal with many, many, many bad customers and endure.
The only difference was that this sounded… scarily genuine.
He blinked.
Can. Help. I. You.
And Mao, because he was suddenly overcome by the urge to woo this mysterious, badly color-coordinated service-industry girl off her feet, said what any charming Casanova on their first impression would say.
"What?"
Except that he was an idiot.
She giggled a bit—at his expense—and he let her. Usually, it drove him insane, but there was something about that giggle of hers that… well… sort of made him think not clear English well very.
Very well.
Not good English very well.
"Can I help you?" she repeated again, for his benefit, in that same, soothing the-customer-is-God voice.
Mao decided he liked that kind of voice.
And for a brief moment he imagined himself sitting at a table in some ritzy restaurant, admiring how perfectly she could read items off a menu to him. Her green eyes were bright and interactive, she was wearing something that didn't clash so horribly with her hair and eyes, and she was just getting to what kind of sides he could have with his pasta when—
"Sir?"
Daydream Bubble Status: Popped.
"What? Oh, right. Um. I'm looking for Lelouch. He does live here right?" he asked cautiously, looking back at the house number for a brief second.
"Yes! He's away on a vacation with Suzaku—his fiancé—and won't be back until the end of next week," she informed him informatively.
A flight attendant, he decided, she could be a flight attendant.
The one who does that ridiculous demonstration about the folding card about emergency procedures that no one ever pays attention to anyway.
"Oh. What about CC?"
"Miss CC is also on a vacation with her boyfriend—who is not Lelouch—and also won't be due to arrive back until the end of next week."
Maybe a nurse.
A sexy nurse.
A sexy nurse not wearing that awful green colour.
Taking his blood pressure.
"I see. Uh... so… who are you?"
"I'm Shirley! I was asked to housesit for them by Milly."
Or a maid.
A French one.
With a feather duster.
Oh! And stockings! Couldn't forget the stockings.
"Are you okay?" she asked, concern tinting that perfect service-industry voice of hers.
A cop maybe—reading him his rights while she cuff—
Oh God, this was getting ridiculous.
"Ah, yes! Sorry, I'm fine."
And then a thought struck him so ingenious that Stephen Hawking would be jealous.
"Are you single?"
"But they look so cute together! And I thought for sure that—"
"Well, it's true," she cut off tersely, still unhappy about all of it.
And honestly, truth be told, even though she was now officially (in her mind and according to her—Gino's claims of all this being established much earlier notwithstanding) in a courting relationship with Gino Weinberg, a small part of her still kind of wanted Lelouch. He was more or less her first love after all.
Despite, you know, him being a douche and everything.
And possibly gay for real.
And possibly gay for Suzaku for real.
Which was mind-blowing in and of itself.
Even so, Kallen had decided to sit with her unpopular opinion that both of them, Lelouch and Suzaku, were still, invariably, straight. Sure, Suzaku had told her (and apparently Gino too) that he was just there to play around with Lelouch for entertainment, but she couldn't deny how… well… how happy he looked lately. Kallen had seen the infamous fake I'm-only-doing-this-because-a-camera's-on-me smile, and the way he smiled around Lelouch wasn't one of them. It was almost as if he actually was in love with Lelouch.
Now what a backfire that would be.
And then there was the matter of Lelouch being straight—who he may or may not be anymore in light of recent events. Heck, he could've just been bi all this time and was actually interested in Suzaku and not after his money after all. Lelouch could actually be in love with Suzaku for real! He had a heart, right?
…
Ha.
Yeah, okay.
Even the Benefit of the Doubt held no ground there.
"You're still sure that neither of them are gay?"
"Pretty damn sure. Well, I'm sure at least Lelouch isn't. I can't say for Kururugi anymore. He sounded pretty rattled on the phone when I asked him about all that media bullshit a while ago. Sounded pretty bothered about it altogether."
"What about Lelouch?"
She shrugged, going for a magazine in the compartment in front of her. "No idea. I haven't talked to him since our double da—I mean, our dinner as friends a while ago."
Gino just grinned, restrained himself from chuckling at her expense, and leaned over to kiss her on the apple of her cheek, causing a cherry red blush to form which was beautifully complemented by pursed lips. (He had since learned what the boundary between pleasure and pain was with her. It was a very thin line.)
"Anyway, it's nice that you have time off from the company."
"Yeah, the boss seems to want me in Japan a lot more for some reason. He's also pretty keen on keeping tabs about Suzaku and Lelouch's relationship for some reason. Although I don't know why."
"Huh. Which hotel are we staying at anyway?" Kallen asked as the seatbelt sign came on.
Gino grinned. "l'Amour Springs Hotel."
L'Amour Springs Hotel.
CC pulled down her sunglasses just a touch to look at the hotel in all its glory. It was a building—a palace really—which screamed luxury with its pristine white-washed walls, gold detailing, and cool marble foundations. From the granite to the welcome mat, the place reeked of wealth beyond imagination. The servicemen and bellhops were all dressed in pristine ivory and gold suits to match the décor and she could see a concierge in a white tuxedo giving directions to a young, newlywed-looking couple.
And then she looked down to read the description she read in the magazine on the flight here. Located in the busiest, but arguably most private, part of the island, it boasted the world's finest resort get-away for lovers, couples, and miscellaneous others. (The last part wasn't in the magazine, but she knew it must be true.)
The bellhops had rushed to take care of her luggage upon seeing her step out of the limousine and have it all prepared in the room before she got there. Her temporary beau was already waiting inside for her and she had resigned herself to enjoying this vacation as much as possible and leaving the poor rich boy high and dry by the end of it. Preferably handcuffed to the toilet or something very far away from her.
To be honest, CC had no real intention of working while in Japan, but this opportunity seemed to have just fallen into her lap. She was admiring a painting of his—which had originally caught her interest because of its striking resemblance to a triple crown pizza (abstractly rendered of course)—and he was visiting in with the curator about various sales his work had made.
They struck up a conversation, he hinted at how beautiful she was, and how rich he was, and how it was fate and they should be together, and CC really couldn't refuse. He took her out to dinner that very night and proposed they go on a vacation at one of his hotel resorts the very next day.
CC could scarcely believe her luck.
And so she had ditched Lelouch to work and get pampered all at the same time. Lelouch was always unhappy about the notion of her working, because men were always more cautious about the Scarlet Woman (as opposed to Scarlet Man?) than women, but generally forgot about any qualms when she finished the job in record time with a few thousand or so in the bank.
The best part was that CC, for reasons that will not be discussed here, didn't exist on paper anywhere.
With a sigh and shrug of her shoulders, CC pushed her sunglasses to rest on top of her head and walked past the jet of air-conditioning into the cool lobby.
Sure, it was a bit risky for her, but it was new, exciting, and exhilarating to be out on her own with a man she had known only for thirty-six hours at most—including flight time. But she couldn't deny the vibe she had gotten from the adorable, clumsy boy who had shown up on the doorstep on her first day of house-sitting. And after their first date, Shirley knew it must be fate that she wind up with this man.
(The history of her thought process passing along this trend for every boy who took interest in her notwithstanding.)
Mao was cute, charming, adorably shy, and he always listened! So well! So very well! He hung onto her every word and could parrot it right back at her without any problems she was sure!
And now, with Nina taking care of things back home, Shirley was on the beautiful Paradise Island—a man-made island resort off the coast of Japan, boasting everything Hawaii, Maui, Honolulu and whatever other tropical resort had and more. It wasn't her first trip away from home or out of the country, but it was her first trip without telling anyone about it!
Her father would be downright angry and that thought made her worried, but was thrilling all at once.
As she chattered away on how happy she was to be here, because she liked to talk and he liked to listen, Shirley just couldn't see how this wasn't a match made in heaven. Most of the boys she met found her too talkative and were always thinking of ways to creatively make her shut up without hurting her feelings (she wasn't stupid).
They walked in past the cool jet of air and right up to the counter where one of the many receptionists at a long white marble counter greeted them pleasantly.
"Welcome to l'Amour Springs Hotel, how may I be of service?"
Lelouch woke up with a headache.
He lifted his head experimentally, wincing his eyes shut at the throbbing sensation in his temple, and fell back down on something soft and fluffy. Upon cracking an eye open to inspect his surroundings, he saw that he was on a bed, in a room not his own and groaned.
As he lay there, feeling like his head was stuffed with cotton and ready to explode, he slowly became aware of various things. He was aware of the slight salty breeze floating in through the open window, the ivory curtains hanging around that window, how soft the pillow beneath his head was, how the blanket covering him was light, comfortable, and smelled of something vaguely familiar, and how nice the silk beneath his skin felt.
Wait.
That didn't sound right.
Lelouch's eyes snapped open and he laid there, stock still, taking in his surroundings which suspiciously looked like a hotel room. And then he noticed that the blanket covering him wasn't a blanket at all but a suit jacket.
And that suit jacket was probably covering him because he was practically naked, stripped down to nothing but his underwear.
"Lelouch! You're awake!"
He froze.
Sweet.
Merciful.
Heaven.
He knew that voice.
But! Maybe it wasn't! It could've been a dream! It could've been all some chloroform-induced (now that he thought about it) dream! All of this could be some effect of being downright kidnapped from his home with something he was pretty sure was illegal in at least six countries. It might not actually be as bad as he was making it out to be! Su—that person—could be a in the shape of a green, gigantic dollar sign and they would then declare their undying love for each other.
Lelouch raised his head and looked—
Brown curls, worried green eyes.
Damn.
—and then laid his head back down on the soft pillow, wondering if it would hurt to bite his tongue.
Suzaku sat down next to him, causing an understandable amount of concern for Lelouch—considering he was practically naked. "Now, I know what you're thinking, but I just want you to know that none of this was my fault, and that nothing happened—" Except for the fact that he had obviously been kidnapped. And stripped. "—so you have nothing to worry about."
There was a moment of silence between them.
Suzaku pursed his lips nervously.
Lelouch just stared at him with an unreadable expression.
And it wasn't so much the fact that he was practically naked in front of Suzaku (this had happened before and was no less mortifying than the last time) with only a suit-jacket (that was probably Suzaku's) to defend his modesty, or the fact that he had obviously been kidnapped far, far away.
It was the fact that he was all of the above and handcuffed to the bed with a red ribbon wrapped around him was on that bothered him.
Which prompted him to do the only thing he knew how to do in this situation.
CC raised her head, suddenly jerking it away as if she had heard something.
That sounded like—
A hand was placed over her wrist and squeezed lightly. "Something wrong?"
Relaxing, she turned to her companion and smiled reassuringly.
It couldn't be.
She was worried and her head was making things up.
Covering his hand with her other one, she shook her head. "No, everything's alright, Clovis."
Note: Okay, because I think, after thirteen chapters, you all deserve at least one after all the ones I've pestered you with, are there any questions you have for me? Gosh. That was hard to do. It's like asking for spam to arrive in my mailbox. Leave it in a review or PM it to me, and let me know if you want it featured somewhere (when I figure out where that will be). If you don't hear a response from me, it's either because you have PM turned off or I didn't think you were seriously asking me a question.
And, yes, I would marry Minute Maid if it were legal to do so. And, no, I don't know when the next installment will come out. Possibly when I have time and remember to work on it.
Please R&R.
- Minute Maid
Beverage of Queens.
