Disclaimer: this is all fanfiction. Rose Zeller is actually in the order of the phoenix. The world of harry potter is owned by JK Rowling.

I haven't had time to work on all my fanfics, but I tried to see which ones were more popular (or I liked more) and am trying to prioritize those. This is one of them. Please review if you like this chapter, or the story in general, and also to give suggestions. Productive criticism is as appreciated (if not more so) as compliments.


Chapter 13- Jarred

Voices. Loads of them, everywhere you looked, all you could register was noise, and a huge mass of students. Jarred had always been in introvert, socially awkward, naturally quiet, friendless. Okay, maybe that was not entirely true. If he were so unlikable, would that boy, Eun Abercrombie, was it? Would he have gestured that he followed him? And if he were so shy, would he really have followed Eun and the mousy dark-haired girl he had also waved to? He must not be that bad then. Maybe Jarred was just setting too high standards for himself. All his life he had been comparing himself to his sister instead of looking at his own skills. It was time for him to rise up and accept his flaws- or better, learn from them.

At least… that's what Eun had told him. Jarred wasn't really buying it. Eun was a highly confident boy. He had big brown eyes like a pool of mud that went on forever- and if you stared at them too long, you would be pulled in with him. He was already dressed in his uniform, and his black new student tie was perfectly in order. He had light brown skin, and shoulder length purplish-black hair. He had long bangs that he was constantly pushing forward instead of back like Rose sometimes did. Jarred thought this might be to cover a splotchy white mark on his forehead. Eun didn't seem like one to care about such things like vanity- but Jarred had a guess as to why this mark might concern him. He soon learned that the Abercrombie family, like his own, was really against Harry Potter and Dumbledore's side of recent politics. With his large round glasses he constantly complained about- he mustn't want any more similarities.

In fact, Eun was right in the middle of a rant that Jarred was vaguely paying attention to. "Honestly, my father works at the ministry and is just sick of all the trouble that Dumbledore and his pawn, Potter are causing. Ha, or maybe it is our headmaster who is the pawn."

Jarred nodded his head. He had told no one this, not even Emily who was the only one he ever confided in, but… He wasn't exactly against Harry Potter. Dumbledore, maybe, but not Potter. What had he really done? Yes, the whole Cedric Diggory thing was awful, but whether the boy was killed by Vol- a dark wizard or not, did it really matter? Yes, it mattered if He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had returned, but he hadn't. It was probably Sirius Black or somebody. How would Harry know the difference? He would want to warn the ministry, was it bad that Harry was taking caution and speaking of what he at least thought he saw? And if it really was just an accident, he had still died. Surely someone cared. Why spend all this energy on Potter instead of getting to the bottom of the death. Harry couldn't prove his point, but was the ministry really trying to prove theirs? Jarred opened his mouth to express at least some of what he was feeling, but Eun interrupted his silent words, and Jarred's jaws closed.

"Speaking of pawns do you play chess? My dad taught me, he works in your uncle's department. That's how I knew you. My dad gave me photos of all the kids to look out for. Celia, here." He pointed to the black-haired witch "Is related to the minister before Fudge. Her name was-"

A boy who Jarred didn't remember sitting next to, suddenly appeared. He startled Jarred by saying in a dull, but loud tone, as if this excited him but no one else "Famous Ravenclaw Ministers for Magic include Millicent Bagnold, who was in power on the night that Harry Potter survived the Dark Lord's curse, and defended the wizarding celebrations all over Britain with the words, 'I assert our inalienable right to party'." He paused as if just registering the fact that Celia and Jarred were openly gaping at him "Oh, I was reading under my dad's invisibility cloak. My name is Robert by the way. Robert Hilliard. I live next to Euen by the way. BTW we are best friends already, sorry."

Jarred noticed he didn't say this in a mean way. He sounded like he genuinely thought Jarred was here to replace him. "Robby, you can't say 'BTW' after saying 'by the way' that would be like saying 'by the way' twice, which is weird. Also, not cool. We can all be friends. It's not a competition"

Robert backed down, but he still eyed Jarred warily. Jarred gave a shy wave which Eun's friend ignored. Fine, if he was going to be that way, there was no point on trying. Rose wouldn't be bothered… so why should he? Celia gave him a slight smile, as if to apologize for Robert's behaviour, even though she, like him, had just met them as well. The minutes ticked on, thanks to his louder-than-need-be watch, he was uncomfortably aware. Getting hot, he rolled up the sleeves of his heavy green sweater. The stress didn't help with the boiling heat, and he scooched a little away from Robert so as to better hide how heavily he was sweating. Robert looked at him strangely, and Jarred embarrassingly realized it looked a lot like he was moving to avoid Robert. Merlin, he needed to work on his people skills. Now Robert would never like him...bother. "I-uh" Everyone turned to stare at him, he gulped "We are, er, almost there, and, and...I should get into my robes now. So, yeah".

Eun nodded "Good thinking. Here-" he passed him his bags, and Jarred gave a smile of appreciation.

What Eun didn't know, was the sign of thanks wasn't for being passed his luggage, but rather to whatever forces had allowed him a good enough excuse to get out of there as soon as he possibly could. Hurriedly rummaging through his stuff until he found and pulled out his robes, he raced to the door. About to close it shut, Celia stood up. Jarred noticed that, besides him, she was the only one still in muggle clothing. Uh, oh. He stopped short, biting his tongue in frustration not to just slam the door shut and keep going.

"Hey, that just reminded me! I probably should change as well. Don't want to get there and be the only one in street clothes. Or worse, the train gets here while I'm changing. Wouldn't want to miss my first day due to laziness."

Jarred vaguely nodded while Celia spoke. Great. He had wanted some time alone to think, so much for any ideas of solitude. As they walked through the halls he ignored her, staying as far away as the narrow aisles allowed. The mobile floor bumped, up and down, Jarred bobbing along with it unsteadily. There was a lump in his throat, and if his gaze hadn't already been fixed on the floor, he would have looked down. Even in his irritation he felt...guilty. Celia had done nothing but kindness the whole insufferable train ride, in fact, she might as well have felt just as overwhelmed as he! He should attempt conversation, any decent person would do it. Rose would do it, he pushed this glum thought aside. Sighing, he opened his mouth to say something, anything. But what could he say. It's not like they were best mates, he barely even knew her. Besides sharing blood with some minister, but Jarred wasn't in the mood to talk politics.

"Excuse me, may we capture your attention for the briefest of moments?" An unfamiliar voice asked politely.

Jarred looked up to see two red haired 7th years peering down at him. Jared didn't like bigger creatures staring down at him. Like he was prey to be caught and eaten last, and not because he was the best of any sort. He immediately looked down. Doing his best to fit into the wall behind him, he froze, making only the noise of fabric vibrating against metal. The older boys focussed on Celia (which was a smart choice, she wasn't cowering against the train's innermost side) they were smiling and one of them reached into the pocket of his robe to distribute small candy-like items into the 1st year's outstretched hand. Okay, so they didn't look scary, or anything of the sort. That is, besides being older. Being older definitely counted as scary. But, it wasn't as if they were trying to be frightening. Jarred couldn't hold them to something like age, which they couldn't control anymore than he could control being so small, and feeling smaller.

Feeling as though his presence wasn't all too much needed, he slinked away a few feet to the nearest bathroom. He was pleasantly surprised at the quality of such, especially since most trains he had boarded were designed for short distant travels and didn't bother with bathrooms at all. It was small, but clean, and had enough room to change in. Upon entering he realized everyone else must have changed beforehand. Unsurprisingly, instead of feel regret in being slow about it- he was just grateful for the lack of a line. Not sure whether to change slowly, in hopes that the older kids would have passed; or quickly, so as to finish before when they were due to arrive at school. He decided to go about getting ready normally- which was altogether slower than most people took, and hope for the best. Exiting a few lengthy moments later, he creeped along the empty bathroom's door, and opened it slowly. Not seeing anyone, he rushed out as fast as he could. So fast- that he didn't even notice the hooded figure until it was too late.

"S-sorry." He mumbled, helping the other person up.

"No problem bro, just look next time." Rose snapped.

"Rose?" He said in surprise.

"No, your other sister." Rose said sarcastically "Of course it's me. Orla's a jerk, I wanna ride with you."

"Um," Jarred said, not sure he wanted to share a car with his bossy younger sister.

Before he could make up an excuse to get away, Celia came in to check on him. She was smiling, and her robe pockets were stuffed with sweets. She opened her mouth to say something, but upon seeing Rose, closed it again. Looking the young girl up and down, she smiled again saying, "So, is this your twin sister?"

"Younger. Sister." Jarred seethed through clenched teeth.

"How-?" Celia started.

"Long story, not important." Jarred said, ignoring Rose's questioning eyes.

Celia frowned, but didn't inquire further. Hugging a bag of merchandise to her chest, Jarred noted that the first year had yet to taste any of her purchased treats. He personally liked to savor his food, but would at least see if the sweets were any good before stocking up in such amounts. Still, who was he to judge? "Well, if you'll excuse me- I still have to change so…"

Rose moved out of her way and Jarred followed suit as Celia marched passed. As soon as she was out of earshot, Rose was on him. "Who was that?" she said, wrinkling her nose "How unpleasant!".

Jarred took a start. His sister was particular with choosing friends, but Celia had been nothing but nice- if not a bit awkward. Compared to who Rose hung out with, she was a saint in fact. Speaking of which, "So, Orla dumped you for cooler older friends?" Jarred asked, he had been dreaded, yet hoping, for this day to come for ages.

"No." Rose scoffed, he gave her an unconvinced glance "She dumped this lad, Stewart, or something. No," she repeated "I dumped her."

"Took you long enough, Orla was…" he fumbled for a word.

"Vain, self-centered, and a total b-" Celia started, zooming out of the bathroom with a slight smirk teasing her lips.

"Billywig?" Rose offered, and Celia let out a small laugh.

"Sure. Ooh, I hate her." Her gaze turned serious for a second "Were you really friends?"

Rose flushed, and Jarred wished he could defend his sister. But what was there to say? Celia was right, Orla was a monster. A trickle of shame ran down him, and he felt a lump of shame rise in his throat. Had he been a bad older brother by standing idly by while Orla and her friends strung his sister along? Sometimes it was easy to forget that Rose was younger, she acted so mature, but Jarred should act more responsibly more the less.

However, before he could come up with something clever to say, Rose answers "I know, right? She was revolting- I was blind not to see through her petty lies."

Rose and Celia went off discussing Orla and various members of her crew. They seemed to be creating a long lasting friendship, if either was even capable. Jarred had thought Celia to be shy, but it turned out she had boldness behind her quiet. Robert had said that he had a lion inside too, but Jarred doubted that. When he looked inside of himself- all he saw were the bad things. Sibling squabbles. Bullying neighborhood kids. Scornful villagers. His parents disapproving and disappointed faces. And most of all, that inner voice, telling him he didn't deserve the magic given to him. "Wait up," Jarred said half heartedly as he trailed after them.

To his surprise, Celia actually paused the conversation- peering back at him. Tugging on Roses sleeve, they came to a stop. Rose clicked her tongue impatiently, while Celia's calm face was serene and patient. Huffing and puffing, Jarred caught up to them. Rose made to lose him again, but Celia whispered something to his sister that made her slow her pace. Jarred looked down, embarrassed. He didn't need her sympathy.

When they got back to the compartment, he let Celia go ahead. Pulling Rose aside, he let out his mind in one big wave. Or, at least tried to. "Rose, I-"

"Geesh, bro. It's cool." Rose said, cutting him off before he could even explain.

"It is?" Jarred blinked at her. "What is?"

Rose made the clicking noise with her tongue again. It was starting to annoy him, was she trying to be rude? "You started this- not me." when Jarred continued to gape, she sighed "I know you don't want me to 'ruin your chance at friendship by being your annoying sister'. Just chill. Trust me, I will help your coolness. Or what's left of it…"

This was so unfair! She just couldn't listen. His vision blurred as he held back tears. Rose's eyes narrowed. Jarred was nowhere near brave, and brought social awkward to a new level- but he never cried. Well, at least he never let her see. On many occasions he had been brought to tears, but he made sure Rose was out of sight. He hated feeling weak to her. With everyone else, he had grown used to it. But Rose was his younger sister. He would be failing to be there for her. Emily was never there when Jarred was in a tough spot. Emily may be the perfect daughter, Jarred just wanted to be a better older sibling.

So far, his hopes for that were fading. His tool box was dwindling, and he had only one chance left. "Rose." He said, firmly.

For once, Rose didn't speak. Her head tilted, and her eyes met his. He had her whole attention, and didn't plan on wasting it. "'To hurt is as human as to breathe,' and hurt I have." he said, quoting Beedle the Bard "I've tried to please Mum, please Dad. And you, and Emily. I try to make friends, but they always think they are above me. Maybe they are. And when I find a nice one, like our cousin, or that boy from skiing, or Celia. You are always there to swoop in and steal them."

He was full on crying now, and couldn't think on how in the world to stop it. Rose had the courtesy to look a tad guilty, but he could tell he hadn't convinced her of his trial. Jarred tried again. "I am not blaming you. Okay, fine, I am. But not fully. I am mad, I have been mad a lot, and I want you to know. When Dad gets cross, and he yells until Mum makes him apology, she says 'Honesty is key to trust. Telling each other what you feel may not cease the conflict, but it erases the confusion.-'"

"'-One cannot defeat their troubles until they look their uncertainty in the eye and accept their fears, if not the challenge. Knowledge is power, and understanding is magic.'" Rose recites.

"'These are the ingredients, and love is the solution'" They say in unison.

"Right." Jarred says, realizing how cheesy it sounded "And I am using honesty now. Siblings fight, but they must apologize if they are to stay close. Bonds may sustain distance, but lies break them in a heartbeat. The relationship between brother to sister is important, especially with us. In a completely new place, a blind adventure where trust and honesty truly are the key. I fear we are losing that. Like I did with Emily. And even Mum and Dad. I am holding you a line, please don't snatch it free."

Rose's eyes get squinty, like she was going to cry too. His sister sobbed often, but mostly just to gain attention. This time, her watery eyes filled with a sorry emotion, not a greedy one. It was times like these when he could see truly how young she was. Jarred wondered if he was too hard. How cruel he was, to place his self hate on her shoulders, even if they almost reached his own. Jarred is about to apologize when Rose chokes out "O-o-ohhhhh…!" she slammed her eyes shut, but not before he could see the red in them "'Clever as I am, I remain just as big a fool as anyone else' that's a lign from Beedle too. Another appropriate one would be; 'No man or woman alive, magical or not, has ever escaped some form of injury, whether physical, mental, or emotional.' It seems you have suffered at least the latter. Some of those times, I suppose myself responsible. What can I do to fix these horrible flaws I've let soil me essence!"

Even when in a deep and severe amount of despair and theatrics, Rose's words were as brilliant as ever. Jarred admired her vocabulary, wishing she had her skill in english. Would people excuse his lack of conversation if what he did say was so smart sounding? He was interrupted from his 'what if?' as Rose gave him a somewhat affectionate (and very tight) squeeze. Somehow managing enough breath to speak, he said, "Rose, we all have flaws. You said so yourself. Honesty has healed some today, at least, right? And-" he said, taking a risk for the truth "Remember, sometimes I don't need your help. I am not as helpless as everyone thinks me, I don't need your advice every second. Sorry."

Rose releases him, a defiant expression on her face "Don't say sorry. I understand. I-"

"Sweet apology, Jarred. But you two should hurry it up." Celia said, emerging from their compartment. "We are approaching Hogsmeade station".

Jarred wondered how much she had heard. As if to answer his thought, she added "No worries, no one else paid any attention." Celia let out a snort "I bet the boys would have heard if you'd yelled. Robert seems obsessed with the sound of his own voice, and Eun just stares off into space, as inanimate as a dust bunny."

"Speaking of the devil-" Rose muttered loudly as Robert and Eun came bounding out of the compartment.

"We're here! We're at Hogwarts! Well, the station at least." Robert practically shouts.

If he heard Jarred's sister's comment Robert didn't show any offense. He just continued to exclaim "We're here! I can't believe it, we're here!"

And so they were.


They are finally at Hogwarts! I am trying to fix Rose and Jarred's dislike of each other, mostly making Rose nicer and Jarred bolder. This story is about character identity and how both siblings change. Will update with the next chapter soon(ish). Thanks for reading!