Disclaimer: I don't own Instant Star. I do own some of the poetry and the songs used
Chapter 2: Parties and Job Offers
"Jude what happened to you?" Jamie asked as I walked into the house, closing the door behind me.
"I went for a walk and got caught in the rain."
"You went for a walk with him, didn't you?" He spat at me. He was always so cold on the subject of Tommy.
"Yes, I did. We haven't seen each other in ten years, Jamie. We just wanted to catch up." I hissed at him.
"What ever, look I got a call from Darius and he wants me to work at his new label."
"Why would you work for him? Especially after what he did to me, Jamie he almost ruined my career and if it wasn't for Tommy, he would have. Also, think about me being near Portia."
"Why the hell do you even care? I mean she hurt Tommy not you." He spat.
"Maybe because actions have consequences Jamie, I mean her actions almost cot me my life."
"Jude that was a long time ago, ten years to be exact." He walked over to me and he tried to hug me. I moved away from him.
"Jamie, her actions of trying to kill Tommy, and killing Angie almost killed me. Hunter came after Tommy and everything that he loved because of her, and at the time I was with Tommy so he came after me." I hissed. I was disgusted at the fact that he would even consider it.
"Jude, the job would be good for us. I mean we would be away from Kat." He said hoping to change my mind.
"No, you don't have a job. I have my job at Island and I'm not leaving. But, hey if you want to take the job, then take it. But if you do then me and you are done." I said. He tried to grab my arm and he leaned into kiss me.
I went in the bedroom and grabbed my journal from where I kept it hidden and my guitar out of it's case and I went out onto the patio and listened to the rain fall and I started singing and strumming my guitar.
Time stops for no
one and moves on unaware
It's easy not to notice
It's easy not
to care
Conversation circles
There's money changing hands
I've
been standing in the middle
I've been caught up in the spin
But out of the
confusion
The static and the noise you got my attention
And
made me wanna live
Live like it's the last moon
rising
Scream just like no one's there
Lose all of my
defenses
Hold you touch you love, you like it's
A very last
moment in time
It seems like I woke up beneath a different
sky
And I'm drunk on what I'm seeing through these open eyes
All
the little ways you move me
All the places you expose
The
illusion I held on to
You've got me letting go
I just wanna
stay here soaking up the rain
Falling all around me wash the world
away
Live like it's the last moon rising
Scream just like
no one's there
Lose all of my defenses
Hold you touch you love,
you like it's
A very last moment in time
Let me feel you
next to me
Let me taste the breath you breathe
Open up the
space between us
Live like it's the last moon rising
Scream
just like no one's there
Lose all of my defenses
Hold you touch
you love, you like it's
A very last moment in time
I finished singing the song and strummed the last chords. I laughed at myself when I was done because the song was about Tommy, and what happened today. I missed writing and this was the first song that I had written in months. I wrote an entry in my journal and then I closed it up and put it back where I got it from. I put the guitar back in its case and I saw Jamie.
"That was amazing." Jamie said trying to make-up from our fight.
"I'm getting in the shower and then I'm going to do some errands." I said with an icy tone and then I walked off.
I went back in the bedroom and shut the patio door. Then I locked it and I went over and locked the bedroom door. I looked at my hiding spot one last time and I decided not to worry about it. I wanted to make this work with Jamie but, I wasn't going to sabotage it though. I don't love him but, I also don't believe in divorce.
I was in love with Tommy and I think that I loved Jamie but, not anymore. Things weren't right between us anymore. I was going to enjoy my time here and forget about it all when I went back home. I'm not letting my feelings for Tommy get in the way of my life. He got in the way before and I wasn't going to let it happen again.
I decided not to worry about it until I had to. I went into the closet and I grabbed a dark denim mini skirt and a strapless top that was hot pink, turquoise, and white. I walked out of the closet and went into the bathroom and locked the door. I turned the shower on and I peeled of my wet and sandy clothes and I let the shower get hot before I stepped in.
I got in the shower and the water felt good. I didn't realize how tense I was. I really needed to relax. I wasn't in the mood to deal with Jamie trying to come in here. I heard him knocking at the bedroom door and I ignored it. I had my reasons for locking the door and he knew that. The water was steaming, and I wasn't ready to get out but, the waster was turning cold fast. I guess I underestimated how long I had been in the shower.
I got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around me, and I wrapped a towel in my hair. I walked over to the counter and I took out the blow dryer and blew my hair dry. After I did that I did my make-up. My head was telling me that I didn't need to do all of this for Tommy but, I couldn't help it. I wanted to look good for him.
I put my clothes on and unlocked the bathroom door and I opened it to let the steam out. I walked into the bedroom and I went to unlock the door and I heard Jamie talking to someone. I slipped on my flip-flops and I walked out. I silently opened the door and Jamie was talking to Darius and he was here.
"Jude, it's been a while." D said as he came over to hug me.
"Yeah, it has."
"How have you been?" He asked me. I was faking a smile like every other day of my life.
"Good." I lied to him.
"Jude, D was here to talk to me about the job." Jamie interjected in the conversation.
"Oh, D how did you find us?"
"I was down here on vacation with Shay, Stephanie, and Eden." He said looking directly at me.
"Ah, how's Portia doing?" I was getting curious.
"She get's out next month."
"and, I'm sure that she's going to get full custody of Jessica after she gets out." I spat.
"Jude, how do you know about her?"
"Let me put it this way, I am never going to forgive you or her for what happened."
"Jude, that had barely any impact on you. But to answer your question she is."
"Guess what Darius it did because her actions almost got me killed."
"Jude why can't you let it go?" D and Jamie asked me in unison.
"Don't ever ask me why I can't let it go." I spat and I walked out. I grabbed my purse and the rain had stopped. The moon was bright and the stars were out in full force. It was a beautiful night, and I was hoping that this night would get better.
I was walking down the beach and I heard the music from a couple houses down. I was glad that no one else was there to hear the music. I was relaxing now that I knew that I was going to see Tommy. I was falling for him again and I couldn't stop myself from doing it.
I missed the fact that he was the only one who understands me. I missed the fact that every time I cried he always held me until I stopped. I loved the fact that Tommy always told me the truth and he never lied at least about my music. I just missed him and I wanted him to know that but, I guess that it was to late.
I walked in the house and I saw Jessica talking to some of her friends. Then I saw Tommy talking to an older woman who had to have been his mother. It looked like his dad was there to. I had never met his parents and he never talked about them.
"Hey Jude." Jessica said.
"Happy Sweet Sixteen birthday girl." I said and she gave me a hug.
"So, I know you're married and all but, my dad still loves you." She said. My mouth kinda hung there for a second.
"Are you sure?"
"Oh yeah, I am so sure. He was grinning from ear to ear when he walked in the house earlier."
"Jess, I still love your father but, I am married to Jamie."
"Yeah but, your married to a guy that you don't love, Jude I saw you look at Jamie this afternoon and you looked at my father and I saw a difference."
"What kind of difference is that?"
"When you looked at my father, I saw a look of passion and with Jamie I saw a look of hatred and unhappiness." She said this with a huge grin on her face.
"You're right but, I don't believe in divorce."
"I figured you wouldn't. My dad told me about it. He talks about you all the time. My grandparents have tried to set him up and when he gets home he just goes into his room and looks at a picture of you both together from before he left."
"Didn't your dad tell you not meddle in people business Jess?" I asked her.
"Yeah but, I never listen. I get that from my mom. She was always nosy."
"I remember. She tried her hardest to get Tommy o admit his feelings for me and he wouldn't."
"That's definitely worth something isn't it?"
"It was"
"Look, I know my dad messed up when he left but, he regrets it. He didn't have to come here when he did. He chose to because he wanted you to understand and he never got the chance because he thought you had already made your choice."
"You really have good intentions don't you?" I asked her with a smile on my face.
"Yes, I do." She said before one of her friends dragged her off. I turned around and noticed that Tommy was gone. I walked out on the beach and I felt a familiar hand on my shoulder. I turned around and it was Tommy.
We were inches apart and I just looked at him. He looked so good in the moonlight and I wanted to kiss him. But, I didn't.
"You and Jess have a good talk?"
"Yeah we did. I found some stuff out."
"Like what?"
"Let's just say that I need to talk to you about something important."
"What?"
"Come here." I pulled him and he followed me.
"Jude what's going on?"
"I found some stuff out and I need to tell you."
"Spill it then"
"Alright, D is here on vacation with Shay, Eden, and Stephanie and he came to Jamie and offered him a job."
"Okay."
"There's more. Portia gets out next month and she is going to fight you for full custody of Jessica."
"She's what?"
"She is. Jamie was offered a job to run D's new label and I think that he's taking it."
"Did he consider your feelings at all?"
"No, they both told me to get over it because it was ten years ago."
"Darius just doesn't want his name ruined and Jamie is mad because it involves me and he hates me."
"You're right on both accounts."
"Then why are you with him?"
"Because I don't believe in divorce,"
"I figured but, I can't stand to see you in a relationship with him."
"I hate myself everyday but, I don't have a reason to leave him."
"Jude-"
"Tommy, look I leave here in a few days and I don't want to do anything that I'll regret."
"I understand that, come on let's go back inside and enjoy the party." He grabbed my hand and we went back into the party together.
I had a fun night. I met his parents and they liked me. I was just regretting not doing what I wanted to do in the first place. I just didn't want to start anymore drama that had already been started. I just wanted to go home and maybe everything would go back to normal.
I said bye to Jessica and Tommy and his parents and I walked back up the beach to go back to the house. I didn't know if Jamie was there or not and right now I didn't care. I walked up the patio and I walked in the door and I saw movement in the bed. It was Jamie and Kat. I could tell because of the woman's hair.
