(Quil POV)
Claire slept most of the day after I took her to Sam's. The kids were down for a nap as well while Sam, Emily and myself sat at the kitchen table. Emily seemed so upset, Katie was her niece, after all.
"At least I can help Jen watch after Claire for now, right?" She sighed, sipping coffee. Neither of them got much sleep with the two young kids. Sam was as reassuring to his imprint as he could be, but there wasn't much anyone could do. I heard soft footsteps and her scent filled the air around us- Claire was awake. She quietly made her way into the kitchen, her hair all over the place. She seemed so.. not herself. Emily got up and patted Claire's back, telling her in a soothing voice to sit down and she would make her a bowl of cereal. She gave Claire a one-armed hug and my small friend sat down in the chair nearest to my right. She silently scooted over to me, the chair scraping the wooden floor, and leaned her head on my shoulder. I let my arm drape over her shoulders, holding her steadily as she sighed. Her heart beat slow as usual- she wasn't erratically upset or in shock anymore, just.. sad.
Big hazel eyes looked up at me from under thick eyelashes. She definitely seemed tired still, though she had slept so much.
For the next three days, my little Claire didn't speak more than a few words.
A whole week passed, and she had begun to make small talk with her aunt and the kids then, a few words to me, as well. I stayed with her unless I had to go on patrol. Jake said he would bring Nessie over to see Claire soon.
The worst day was probably the day that I had gotten the call from Jenna. She sounded unlike herself- as if a big part of her was entirely gone. I knew what was going to happen- I think we all did.
"They mentioned her being an organ donor, y'know, like I know she wanted to be when she got her license. A little boy in Florida is getting her retinas so he can see for the first time, and they said that they would contact me when they found a match for her heart." Jenna sounded as if a part of her was going to die, too. "Her brain activity keeps decreasing- she's gotten down to nineteen percent. They said that there isn't even chance of a miracle to save her. The put a breathing tube in about three days ago." She spoke erratically, as if she had no idea how to say it all. It seemed so foreign, talking about my imprint's sister, whom I had grown pretty close with, as if she were already dead.
Claire had opted to stay with Emily and not visit Katie- she said she couldn't handle seeing her sister like that. I understood perfectly clear- had I had a sibling, I wasn't sure if I would be able to, either.
Jenna decided that I should bring Claire up so I could be there when she told her about what had to happen- Jen knew that Claire would need me there, and I knew it, too. I wanted to help her through this.
The smell of the hospital was so strong to my heightened senses, I hated it, but I stuck through for Claire. We sat in the room, Claire on my lap again. She had her head leaned against my neck, watching her sister's forced breathing. My little Claire had never seemed so.. numb, quiet, reserved, and even lost. While her and Katie weren't impossibly close, we all knew they loved each other and Claire looked up to her big sister. We all noticed when she stole one of Kate's shirts or a piece of her jewelry, and Katie usually pretended not to notice, or let Claire keep it. Claire still wore their friendship bracelet they had made years ago- Katie probably would have been, too, if she didn't have a cast on that arm. I rubbed Claire's arm reassuringly as she sat so still, watching her sister and her broken mom.
"Claire, sweetheart," he mother's tired voice rasped, as I noticed Claire look up slightly to meet her mom's gaze. "Come here, honey," she held out her free arm, which Claire walked slowly over to, leaning into Jenna's shoulder.
"I miss you, Katie too," Claire whispered. "I just can't.." The lump in her throat was obvious through her speech. She hid her face in Jenna's shoulder, and Jenna kissed the top of her head. "When is she gonna wake up?"
"Baby, Katie's not doing that good," Claire looked up quickly, her face seeming so defeated. "The doctors and I had a talk today. There's no chance she's gonna come back, baby. Keeping her here any longer wouldn't be right." She finished, gauging Claire's reaction. The girl who had been so quiet and reserved for over a week suddenly changed. She furrowed her brows, seemingly in confusion and anger.
"What? But.. they said she had a chance!" Claire spoke loudly, anger clear in her eyes. Jenna didn't seem shocked. "She had a chance, mom! Katie? Katie!" Claire yelled to her sleeping sister who laid in the bed, un-moving. She didn't budge.
"No, Katie, you can't leave me!" She shrieked. "You're gonna get better and come home!" Jenna and I made eye contact, her nodding slightly. I made my way quickly to Claire, kneeling behind her and putting my hands on her shoulders.
"Claire, kiddo, it's okay, calm down," I tried to reassure her, and it seemed like it worked, for a moment.
It didn't.
She shook herself free from my grip.
"No!" Tears streaked down her cheeks. She was too young to have to go through something like this. So was Katie. It wasn't right, not any of it. "No, Quil," she whimpered, her anger wavering, giving way to the sadness that enveloped her once again. I took her into a hug and warm little arms hugged around my neck in a choke hold. It was killing me to see her cry and be in so much pain- I could feel the agony in my own chest.
"I don't want my sister to die," she sobbed into my neck, tears dampening my shirt. I rubbed her back, sitting on the floor cross-legged and holding her in my lap again. She let it out. Jenna and I explained it all to her.
"She's gonna help a little boy be able to see for the first time, and someone is going to live a lot longer thanks to her, baby," Jenna smoothed Claire's hair, and the little girl sniffled, looking up.
"Really? How?" Her tear-reddened eyes glanced at her mother, full of some form of hope.
"When people pass away, they can donate things like their eyes, heart, lungs- things like that. He's getting a part of her eye that he needs to see," Jenna smiled reassuringly, which Claire sort of returned. She sniffled again, hugging me tighter, but keeping her gaze on her mom and Katie.
"I don't want her to die, mommy," she whispered almost too quietly to Jenna, and I could see Jenna tear up slightly.
"I know, baby. None of us do- the gods are just ready for her sooner. You'll see her again one day, and she'll always be with you," she reassured Claire. The three of us sat in those places for over two hours, silently and calmly, yet sad. So, so sad. I had thought Claire started to fall asleep as the rhythm of her heart slowed, but she was just a lot more calm. Her small hand held Jenna's tightly as I held her on my lap, still on the floor. Listening to the slow, stable beeping of one of the machines, Claire didn't move.. Until that beeping became one long, steady ring. Claire sat up instantly as multiple doctors filed into the room, urging the three of us to wait outside. Claire was silent this time, aside from her crying into my neck again. I held her tightly as Jenna told us to go in the waiting room while she waited outside the door. The event happened so quickly, but once we got to the waiting room, time crawled by slowly. Every time she cried, though, I felt as if I were being kicked in the chest. I hated seeing her so sad, especially when there wasn't anything I could do aside from be here- but if I could do at least that, I could stay here with Claire 24/7.
I sat myself and Claire on the couch, letting her sit next to me and curl up against my side. I looked down at her just as she looked up at me.
"Quil? Why does stuff like this have to happen?" She asked- while Claire was very smart, just like Katie, she was still only ten years old. A kid, still innocent from a lot of the real atrocities of the world. "I mean.. Katie.. she's smart, and she's so, so nice." She emphasized every word. "She doesn't deserve to die. None of her friends did, either. She was supposed to go to college and be a vet," she reminded me, one of the dreams that Katie had. She loved animals, although Jenna was allergic to their dander or something like that. Claire was right, she was a great kid. I thought hard for a few moments- while Claire had a perfectly valid point, sadly, that was just how the world was. All of the best people seem to not get a full life.
I felt a sharp pain in my heart as I looked into her eyes- sadness, nothing more. She seemed more.. comforted when I was there, at least. Someone so young didn't deserve to go through so much loss in her life. Especially not Claire, in particular. She had already lost her dad- which at least she couldn't remember. Not her sister, too. It was hard to believe that the night before everything fell apart, we were sitting around their kitchen table, eating pizza. Claire was laughing, and I got to show her my wolf. Things were.. perfect. I hugged Claire closer, taking a deep breath.
"Y'know, kid.. I don't know if I have the answer to that. Your sister was a great person. She was smart, kind.. basically the best things a person could be. She had dreams, just like everyone else does. But sadly.. people do die. Great people. Amazing people, just like Katie, every day." Claire stared at the tile floor, seeming so defeated and lost. Before she could speak again, I continued. "Of course, though, there's always something you could do. Remember how nice and wonderful Katie was? Live that out for her. You don't have to let her die, not fully. Just because she won't be physically here, doesn't mean that she'll be gone forever. Let a part of her live on through you." Claire's eyes welled up with tears again, but not from sadness as much. I saw her smile for the first time in over a week, even seeing it in her eyes, as well. Her arms wrapped around my torso as tightly as she probably could.
"Thank you, Quil." I kissed the top of her head, feeling the pain in my own chest lighten. As I looked back up in the waiting room, Jenna stood in front of us. Claire looked up as well. Jenna nodded, entirely silent- we knew what she meant. Claire walked down the hallway, between her mother and myself, one of our hands in each of hers, to say goodbye to Katie.
(Claire POV)
That was probably the worst day, yet the best in some way. While I had to let my sister go forever, at least physically, anyway, Quil was there. He supported me the whole way.
I had spent a whole week at my aunt's house, depressed beyond belief. Even with two young kids, aunt Em still made sure I ate throughout the day and took care of myself and Sam tried his best to make me laugh. Quil spent the whole week with me, aside from when he had to go out and do his part as a part of the pack. I don't think that I spoke more than twenty words the whole week there.
And then my mom called. Quil talked to her, and we went to the hospital. She told me Katie wouldn't make it. I was angry. I yelled, at my mom, at Katie, and even at Quil. I didn't want to let her leave- but I had no choice. They told me that she would still be helping someone when she passed away- a little boy would be able to see because of her, and her heart would save someone's life. Hearing that helped, a lot. We all sat by her bedside for well over an hour, entirely silent.. until she flatlined. Quil took me out of the room and into the waiting room as I cried. Mom waited by her doorway. Finally, a question that I had been mulling over in my head for over a week came out.
I looked up at Quil as I huddled close to his side on the uncomfortable waiting room couch, looking into his dark brown eyes. He, too, seemed sad even. I asked him why good people died. As amazing as Katie was- so sweet, kind, understanding, helpful- the list went on for days, she had to die? Why? Why would the gods take her away from us? He explained it to me. And he was right.
I wouldn't truly be losing her. She would always be with me, in spirit. Just because she wouldn't always be in her room or with me physically didn't mean much. I could still let her kindness and all of her amazing traits live on through me. I didn't want to let her die, but now I didn't have to. I wouldn't let her ever fully die.
Then we walked back down into her room, the three of us, together.
The doctor was waiting for us in Katie's room. Her heart monitor sounded a lot slower and more uneven then. He told us we should all have a seat. I stood next to my mom that time, and Quil sat on Katie's other side. Mom and I would need each other through this. The doctor's face was grave and so apologetic.
"Her heart stopped, but we got it beating again. Ms. Young and my staff have decided that it would be best to let Katie go peacefully. You all have time to say anything you need- she can still hear you, before we turn off the machine that's breathing for her." He paused briefly as I let mom lean forward, to speak to Katie. "I'll let you all have your moments," he nodded respectfully as he exited the room, closing the door.
"Katie.. my baby," she cooed to my sleeping sister, whose eyes remained closed. He skin was so pale, especially for her. Apparently, while we were waiting, mom called aunt Em, because she walked into the room quickly. I could see Sam outside the window- he wasn't good at things like this, Em told us. Tears fell down her cheeks quickly, and she knelt next to me, next to mom and Katie. I hugged her tightly- this was her first time seeing Katie since the accident, and it would be the last time as well.
"Everyone who loves you to pieces is here. Me, Emily, your little sister, Quil Ateara, even uncle Sam, and he hates hospitals," mom chuckled sadly. "We're all here for you, sweetie." Her thumb stroked Katie's cheek. "I remember when you were just a little baby, when daddy taught you to ride a bike, your first time in a restaurant- how you threw a piece of your food at us because we wouldn't let you eat a crayon," everybody laughed, even me. I did envy Katie for that- she got to know dad. "Whenever daddy passed away, and how strong you were through it- oh, you were so strong, baby girl," she smiled sadly, sniffling as a single tear fell down her cheek. I squeezed her hand tightly. "You helped me and Claire get through it- then Quil came along," she looked up at my best friend, who smiled sadly himself. "You and your sister loved Quil- he helped all three of us and he was like your guys' big brother, and he still is." She paused for a long moment. "We're gonna be okay, baby, and so will you. I know I'll see you again one day." Mom urged aunt Em to talk to Claire as she had to exit the room and get some air. Emily took mom's chair, holding Katie's hand. She was quiet for a while- Emily wasn't the most emotional person, but she was obviously crying.
She told Katie that she loved her and she would miss her, and she told her about her favorite memories with her, then she had to leave- she said that it was too heart-breaking to see her like that. We understood, and I told Emily that I would see her later. She hugged me, almost too tightly, then left. It was only myself and Quil in the room then, and I met his gaze. He instantly made his way over to kneel next to me and have his arm around my shoulders, holding me securely. I wasn't sure that I would have been able to handle something like that without him there.
"Katie.." I whispered, taking her cool hand in mine. Her nails were still painted the light pink that she had them before. I smiled sadly- she loved to paint her nails. They were always a different color each week. "You're my big sister, my best friend.. you're the best big sister someone could ever ask for. You helped me and taught me so much. I remember how we used to make those bracelets and necklaces together, and how you let me make your first pair of earrings that you wore after piercing them behind mom's back," I chuckled. "And how even when you knew I stole your clothes or your perfume or something, you would act like you didn't notice. I know you did." I squeezed her hand again. "I still have this thought that you're gonna sit up and laugh and ask why you're in the hospital, like it was some big prank or something. Or, when I'm at aunt Emily's, when is where I've been for like a week now, you're gonna walk down the stairs and insist that we bake cookies together. Man, you always had a mad love for Em's cookies." I laughed again, and I heard Quil chuckle, too. I was quiet for a few moments, letting a tear fall down my cheek. "I'm gonna miss you like crazy, Kate," I smiled sadly again, letting go of her hand.
I let Quil talk to her then. We didn't move- I didn't think I could, or else I would probably break down and cry again. I couldn't believe that I was saying goodbye to her, but I had to be strong. For Katie, for mom and aunt Em, for Quil, and for myself.
"Gonna miss ya, kid. You really were great. I'll wear that necklace you made me tomorrow, promise," Quil smiled, and looked to me reassuringly, then back to Katie. "I'll make sure your favorite clothes don't go to waste," he chuckled. I smiled with him. "And I'll take care of Claire and your mom. We're all gonna miss ya, Katie." He concluded. As if on cue, everyone else came into the room, even Sam and the doctor and one of his nurses. We all remained on Katie's left side as they stood on her right. Sam hugged Emily and she hid her face in his shoulder. He tried to smile reassuringly to me, but I knew he couldn't. I understood. I nodded and turned my attention to my sister and her doctors. Mom was standing on my right and Quil kneeling on my left still as I sat in mom's chair. They both held one of my hands as the doctors let her go.
I think that would have to be the saddest day of my life, knowing that she definitely wasn't coming home with us.
After, Sam and Emily left. The three of us waited with Katie and mom discussed what arrangements she wanted to be made. She didn't want a funeral, she said- we pretty much just had one, were her exact words, and she was right. She would have Katie cremated and she would stay with us. After, mom turned to me, kneeling down and taking both of my hands in her. She smiled, still so sad.
"Claire, honey, do you want to come home with me tonight or stay with Em and Sam?" Of course I wanted to come home with her, I told her. I loved my aunt, uncle, and my niece and nephew- but I don't think that I slept a whole night without waking up to a baby crying. Plus, I missed my mom, my home, and my bed. She seemed relieved that I wanted to come home with her.
That night, Quil took me home to be with my mom. He promised that when I woke up the next morning, he would be there. I couldn't thank him enough for being there with us.
Over time, I knew we would all heal.
