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"Thanks for having me" Lexie awkwardly stood in the hallway.
Meredith didn't even bother looking at her anymore. They had spent a pretty nice day and they were just beginning to understand each other. Or so she thought. Obviously, she was wrong.
Derek had just gotten back from the hospital, and was still trying to understand what exactly happened. "Lexie we should talk about this. Meredith and I can meet with Thatcher, we can get him the help he needs. You don't have to... "
"There's no point Derek, she already made up her mind. " Meredith's patience ran out half an hour ago. Now she would just act with indifference. If her efforts weren't appreciated, then she'd just stop trying.
The begging voice needed something to hold on to. "Meredith, please...He's my dad! I can't just give up on him. I will talk to him. I will make this right.. I need to try." Lexie didn't need much at this point. No blessings, a simple nod from her sister would be more than sufficient. "Would you give up on someone you love? Would you give up on Derek if he were in trouble?"
Meredith aggressively crossed the room and threw herself in front of the naive brunette. "Derek NEVER hurt me!" she yelled with conviction. "Can you say the same about you daddy? Can you look me in the eyes and tell me he never hit you?" Meredith felt as frustrated as she was angry. There was nothing she could say that would matter at that point. They were back at zero: Meredith felt sickened by Lexie's naivety. The only difference was that now, she did care about what would happen to her sister.
The two women stared at each other without speaking for a while. Lexie's eyes were apologizing while she wondered if she'd ever get another chance with Meredith. "I need to try." The brunette whispered once again.
Meredith's frozen eyes were now impossible to read. While she felt a storm preparing itself on the inside, she appeared as cold as ice.
"Your car is at the hospital.. I can give you a ride" Derek broke the unbearable silence.
"She can walk for all I care" Meredith bitterly mumbled. Lexie was throwing herself to the wolves and she certainly wouldn't help with that.
Once again, the awkward silence was filling the space. Lexie was nervously playing with her fingers.
"Are you sure about this?"
"He's my dad, I... I can handle him" Most of the time. Denying reality sometimes is the only choice we think we have.
"He's not your responsibility." Derek insisted although he was sure Meredith already tried to establish that point earlier. He wasn't convinced it was his place to preach but he couldn't help it.
"He's not... It's not like you think it is. Sometimes" The brunette confessed, realising it was the first time she opened up about Thatcher. Her voice was filled with emotion "Sometimes he holds me and.. while he cries, he implores me to never leave him." Lexie's heart was holding on to the precious moments when Thatcher was so heartbroken that he would cry and apologize for hours. "He loves me. He is my dad"
"I'm sure he does" Derek nods, offering a comforting smile. "But what happens when he can't control his temper Lexie?"
Maybe it was weird, but the brunette felt more relaxed talking about it with Derek than with her sister.
"He... I... It doesn't really happen often" Lexie answered with embarrassment
"It doesn't matter and you know it."
"Look, I'm not making any excuses. But I need to give him the benefit of the doubt. I will talk to him tonight. I will tell him how I feel about the drinking."
Derek couldn't say he agreed with Lexie, but since nothing would change her mind, he at least made clear that he was willing to help. When he stopped the car, he asked Lexie for her phone and registered his number and Meredith's. "Whatever you need, we're one call away."
Lexie offered a shy smile, avoiding eye contact. "Tell Mer I'm sorry"
Lexie still needed a minute before getting out of the car. It felt like going back there meant giving up on having a relation with Meredith.
"She likes you" Derek reassured.
"She's mad" Lexie sighed.
"Yes she is. Because she likes you" Derek insisted though. "We could both go back.."
"No!" Lexie cut off. "I mean thank you but.." The brunette opened the vehicle door. "My place is here"
"Take care of yourself"
Lexie nodded. Derek observed as Lexie disappeared. He even waited a few minutes, just in case.
Sometimes, it helped to know better than others. Just sometimes though. Tonight, it felt like a curse. Meredith hated that she could predict the future. Her sister would get hurt, again. And there's nothing she could do to avoid her pain. Why didn't she stop her? Because it's impossible to save someone who doesn't want to be saved.
Derek was hugging her and she didn't know if she wanted to push him away or on the opposite, clinging on to him for as long as she could.
"I was being nice to her" Meredith grumbled, as if it has been an effort.
"I know"
"She's stupid and immature and credulous and..." Meredith mumbled
"Maybe.."
"No, not maybe, you don't get to defend her. She's stubborn and.." It surely would feel misplaced for Derek to affirm Meredith was even more stubborn. So he nodded, trying not to smile.
"She's not ready to let go of him. When my father died, I would have given anything for a chance to have him back." Derek's compassion towards Lexie was sincere.
Meredith let the new information sink in. But, even her clemency had a limit, and right now, she couldn't take any more on her shoulders. "Still, Thatcher's a drunk. I'm sure he's a pain in the ass."
"She only sees"
"What she wants to see. Stop it now! I don't wanna talk about Lexie anymore, I don't wanna hear her name, and I certainly don't care about what happens to her." Meredith drastically concluded.
It was a little after 3 AM when Meredith's sixth sense woke her up with a jolt. She hated the poignant feeling in her core. Imagination is a tricky power, she told herself. The young woman was about to reposition herself close to Derek when her phone rang. Even though she hadn't answered yet, she already grabbed the closest pair of jeans she could find. It wasn't her imagination after all. She just knew something was wrong.
"Lexie?" The sobbing and the agonizing screams took Meredith's breath away.
