Chapter 14: Her Name

He could barely remember how it had happened. The unbearable throbbing of his head was threatening to close in on him, making him wonder if he was going to die because of it. It hurt too much to even think about lifting his head off the cold metal table. He remembered waking up alone. Cameron was supposed to be keeping watch but she had disappeared. She had abandoned him. He remembered feeling like he was going to faint on the spot and couldn't help but wonder if it was some kind of test. He had convinced himself that it had to be a test. Then things got fuzzy.

He felt the plasma blast burn just above his left shoulder before he ever saw the Terminator. He remembered falling and landing on a jagged piece of concrete. He wasn't sure if his head had snapped back or if the Terminator had hit him over the head with it's gun but now it throbbed. Somehow he had fallen unconscious again and then he woke up in the cell. The same cell he was in now. But he couldn't remember when they had branded him. He thought he would have tried to resist but as the machine interrogated him, he knew he couldn't do anything.

But the pain… he could never forget the pain. They asked him questions he didn't have the answers too. He hadn't even tried to stay composed. He knew it was hopeless. No one except Cameron and the Lieutenant General knew he had left and it was too risky to save him without getting more people caught. He was utterly alone and it hurt more than any kind of pain they inflicted on him. He had trusted them and they had abandoned him in return. Every fibre of his being hurt now. His racing heart ached with stress at the mere thought of the numbers on his wrist. They had branded him like an animal. He was one of their prisoners now.

"Justin."

The boy's body shook with silent sobs as tears rolled down his cheeks. It wasn't real. The voice was a lie. It was just a trick his mind was playing on him to try and convince himself that there was a shred of hope left. His world was already hell and he didn't see how it could get any worse. The constant throbbing in his head synced with the seconds of his life that were painfully ticking away. He had tried lifting his head but it hurt too much. He couldn't do it.

"Justin, please."

There it was again. Nothing more than a ghost of his past. He forced the voice out of his head and filled his mind with questions. Where had Cameron gone? Why had she let the machines take him? How was he supposed to complete his mission now? Lieutenant General Brewster had been counting on him and he had slept on the job, believing that his companion would keep him safe. But she abandoned him. Why was he even still alive?

"Justin!"

He couldn't lift his head. She wanted him to look at her but he couldn't. It hurt too much. Tears ran down his stinging cheeks as his breaths fell heavy and labored. Every breath felt like a stab to his lungs and the air was sharp and hot. The world around him had simply stopped turning. He just couldn't do it anymore. He wanted to die. A strangled sob ripped past his lips, instantly turning into a howl of pain. He weakly stamped his right foot on the concrete floor as he pressed his throbbing head on the metal table. There had to be something to take away the pain.

"Dude seriously! I'm not gonna say your name again."

Justin's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. She was no longer begging him. She sounded annoyed yet… excited.

"Come on! I've been waiting an hour for you to get your lazy butt out of bed. If you don't hurry we're both going to be late to my wedding! And if you think that I'm going without you, you're dead wrong. So get your single, hungover self out of bed and in the bathroom. I'll grab your suit."

Wedding? She wasn't old enough to get married. They were twins and he knew he wasn't an adult yet. His voice scratched against his throat, barely coming out above a whisper.

"What?"

"You heard me, Justin Adebayo Herr, get up! I'm gonna be a Mrs. soon!"

Tears fell as he squeezed his eyes shut, grinding his teeth as he struggled to lift his head. He cried out in pain.

"Come on!"

It was agonizing but he could do it. He had to see what was going on. It didn't make any sense. The world was at war, there was no way they could do a wedding. He was shackled up in a work camp not lying in some comfy bed. He had suffered hours of interrogation and torture and they were coming back for more. He knew it wasn't real. But he had to see his sister again. He willed himself to open his eyes and drew in a painful gasp at the sight.

The picture was blurry but it was his sister. The morning sun was peeking through the light blue curtains, making her perfectly white wedding dress look like it was glowing. It was angelic. His sister Jaenell Adah, the one he had seen die, was standing in front of him brushing off a nice black suit. He could see her lips moving but didn't catch a word she said. His head was pounded too hard to hear anything else. She set the suit down on a chair and walked over to his side, kneeling by him. Her plump lips curved into a smile he had always loved seeing and she sighed.

"You know, Justin, you're lucky that we decided to have the wedding in the backyard otherwise we would have been waiting a thousand years for you to show up."

"I… I…"

Her golden amber eyes bore into his, illuminating in the bright sunlight. Tears blurred in his eyes once more as he flicked over every detail. He frantically took in her thick eyebrows, the golden eyeshadow and black eyeliner, the small scar on her forehead from that time he had accidentally tripped her, the white earrings hanging from her ears, and her coiled black curls wild and free as an afro. He thought she would have pulled her hair back but she wasn't and he still loved it.

"Come on, man. Have a little faith! I know that you've been struggling right now with the breakup and everything but it's okay. Everything's going to be okay."

"Jaenell…"

"I mean, look at me! Remember all those nights I sobbed on your shoulder because I was alone? And now…"

She flashed her engagement ring in his face, letting the sunlight catch the diamond.

"This is it. The day I've been dreaming of for my entire life and I am not going if my brother isn't there. Do you get that? I'm not going without you. I would never go without you."

Justin shook his head slowly, trying his best not to sob as he looked at his sister.

"You left…"

"No, Justin. I didn't. Here, I'll make you a promise."

She extended her hand once more and stuck out her pinkie finger and wrapped it around Justin's.

"I solemnly swear that as long as one person in the world knows my name that I will never leave my twin brother, no matter what."

Jaenell smiled as she pulled away, jumping to her feet. The train of her dress trailed behind her as she moved to pick up his suit.

"I know that things haven't been easy lately but it's okay. We're all gonna be okay, Justin. It's just a part of life. Things will get better."

She tossed the suit on the bed next to him and winked as she turned on her heel. She walked toward the door and panic filled Justin at the thought of being alone again. He tried to shout her name but no sound came out. He was locked in time, only allowed to observe. She closed the door behind her and Justin turned to the window, expecting the room to grow dark again. The desperation and pain trickled back into his mind and overwhelmed him. And just like he knew it would, the scene faded in front of his eyes and he was left staring at the empty chair in front of him.

His chest tightened in pain and he tried to keep himself from gasping but couldn't. He squeezed his eyes shut, screaming at his sister to come back. He just wanted to see her smile again. He wanted to hear her voice one more time. He just wanted to hug her and believe she wasn't really gone but all he could see was the bad. He tried to grasp onto the memory of her wedding dress but was unable to find it in his thoughts. Tears pricked his tired eyes once more as the terror settled in his bones.

He could hear her scream tear through the air as he tried to drag her away from their dying mother. He wanted nothing more than to stay with her but she insisted they leave her behind. He remembered how she kicked and screamed, scratching his arms with her fingernails but he never let go. He had been there to hold Jaenell as she dropped to the ground the next morning, sobbing. They had been too afraid to fall asleep that night.

He remembered the many days that followed, traveling alone, scavenging for anything useful only to find nothing. And the one time they had found food, she had told him she wasn't hungry and he hadn't given a second thought to it as he had eaten. Guilt shot through his veins at the thought that she might not have died if he had shared what they had found. The fleeting hope of finding a group only to experience the agony of seeing the wild eyes of the desperate survivors who attacked them, stealing what little food they had, and killed anyone who got in the way.

He had tried to keep Jaenell back but the moment that soldier pointed his gun at a toddler, he knew from the depths of his soul that it was over. He barely had time to scream before the bullets hit his sister. Justin leaned forward in despair, letting his head fall onto the metal table again as he tried to get the image out of his mind but he couldn't. His head throbbed as he cried, remembering how he clung to his sister's dead body, unable to say goodbye. He had wanted to die then. He wanted to stay there forever and die with the his last family member but the Resistance had taken him.

Tears pooled on the table, wetting his forehead as he sobbed. In that moment, the only physical pain he felt was heartbreak and separation. He couldn't feel his heart beating out of his chest or his bones jabbing into his lungs. He didn't register the fact that they were so heavy and labored that he could barely breathe. He tried to cry but they had all gone away. He was hot and sweaty and tired. His gut plunged to his toes as he heard the metal door open with a creak. He tried not to think of the machine that was about to loom over him, asking the same questions he didn't have the answers to. He felt the metal handcuffs tighten against his wrists as he tried in vain to twist them.

"I solemnly swear that as long as one person in the world knows my name that I will never leave my twin brother, no matter what."

Justin's body trembled as he heard the machine speak but he didn't listen. She wasn't gone… not yet. There was still one person who knew her name which meant that she was here with him. He grit his teeth as he slowly lifted his head, meeting the dead red eyes of the machines he hoped he would never meet. He gave the metal monster the best glare he could as he breathed her name out. His twin sister. The only reason he had lifted his head. He gathered as much saliva as he could and spit it at the ground in front of the machine then looked up and shook his head slowly.

"Connor will stop you."

"And who will save you?"

He could feel the corners of his mouth tugging into a smile but he was unable to form it.

"Jaenell."

Now there were two people who knew her name; Justin and Carol Pointe.