For all you Yaoi haters, never fear. Even though the title sounds Yaoi-ish, it isn't exactly romance. Well, just keep reading to find out.
Meta Knight carefully watched as Captain Falcon, still in Toon Link's body aproached him.
"Look, man. I need to ask you to do something for me..." He whispered. "You see, Samus agreed to go out on a date with me and-" Meta Knight gasped, stopping him from talking.
"S-Samus! I thought she hated you!" Meta Knight held up Lucas' stick. Captain Falcon only glared. "Er, if you were trying to ask Lucas for date advice, then you have issues."
"No, but you.. are Lucas, you know-"
"Yes yes, I know that! Except I could probably set you up much better, alright? Just visit me later at say, 4 PM. 'Kay?" Meta Knight grumbled. Captain Falcon nodded as he left for his dorm room.
Meta Knight glared around the room. "Wasn't Samus in deep love with Snake..?"
"What do you mean I'm on a date with Captain Toon Falcon!" Samus screeched. "I can't go looking like this!" Her and Red had swapped bodies, and since it was only once a day per person, she had to be him for the rest of the day.
"Well... I didn't mean to, I mean, I didn't say anything but he just took it as a yes!" Red held his chest area cautiously. "Man, these are huge! At least I'm in your Power Suit..." Samus shuddered.
"No matter. Snake is busy in his world, so you're on a date with Captain Falcon." She smiled.
"But I can't go on a date! I don't wanna be gay!" Red shook her shoulders violently.
"Well, you technically aren't gay, since you're in my body, which is feminine."
"That doesn't count! I don't wanna kiss him!"
"Well, I ain't going on a date with my worst enemy. And besides, if he tries to kiss you, just kick him!" Samus held his three Pokeballs up high. "So, you're going on the date or else."
"Or else what?" Red grinned. Samus took a glance at the river that flowed beside the Smash Mansion, then the Pokeballs.
"You want me to throw 'em in the river? Okay, I'll go do that now-"
"No!" Red tugged the Pokeballs from her arms. "Anything but that!" He paused. "Fine. I'll go on the stupid date but only if you watch over my Pokemon!" Samus groaned.
"Fine. I'll watch your Pokemon for a few hours, you go on the date. Is that clear?" Red was already out the door and in heading for the dining room. Red's three Pokemon, Squirtle, Ivysaur and Charizard glared at her.
"Guys, could you cooperate with me and be kind, little Pokemon?" She said sweetly. They looked at each other and then glared at her.
Squirtle chirped as he nudged her. They all looked hungry.
"Eh, what exactly do Pokemon eat?" Samus sighed.
There were only a few tables in the 'Romance Room,' as most Smashers called it. It was where happy couples could eat in peace as the others chatted and such in the main dining room. Meta Knight was busy looking out for 'Samus'.
"Is she here yet?" Captain Falcon asked as he lit up a candle. "Hopefully she didn't cheat on me!" Meta Knight looked back at Captain Falcon.
"Jeez, you could've at least changed back to yourself, what is Toon Link gonna say when he sees chapstick all over his real face?" He tripped over for the millionth time that day.
"Meta Knight, here's some advice; tie your shoes!" Captain Falcon pointed to the red shoes that Lucas and now Meta Knight was wearing.
"How am I supposed to know how?" The two shot glances at each other. "Wait, there she comes!" Meta Knight rushed for the kitchen, which was actually connected to both the dining and romance rooms.
Samus, AKA Red, hid by the door as he set something up. In his hands was a strange looking gadget. "Hope this works," he mumbled as he set it at the top of his Power Suit helmet. Finally, he gained the courage to walk in and next to Captain Falcon.
"Hey, Sammy," Captain Falcon approached him. "Even in your power suit you shine brighter than ever!" Red, trying to be more Samus-like, gave a small giggle. The gadget in his helmet caused his voice to sound exactly like Samus. "So, shall we sit down?"
Captain Falcon tried to take his hand but Red ended up kneeling down a bit, as he was now two times Captain Falcon's height, but only because the pilot was in Toony's body. The candle light lit up their surroundings a bit, and was sitting in the middle of their table.
"What kind of drinks would you like to order?" Meta Knight had came out and was holding a tray in one hand and a notepad and pencil in the other. He was taking advantage of being taller and longer arms while he could.
"Ah, we'll both have some champagne, please." Captain Falcon said before Red could argue. Champagne, Red thought. I'm not even old enough to get my driver's license! Meta Knight nodded as he headed back to the kitchen. The two of them waited in silence.
"So..." Captain Falcon tried to converse with Red. "How're things going with Snake recently?" Red shuddered. Oh, of course he had to ask me that! He paused momentarily.
"He's on a mission back at his universe," Red told him. Captain Falcon sighed.
"No one should trust him, I mean, he was supposed to DIE in his last game-"
"But the year set in that game was 2014." Red tried to keep quiet after that, just to avoid angering his date. Meta Knight finally came with two wine glasses and a bottle of champagne.
"Some drink for our lucky couple," he smirked. "I'll be back in a moment to take your orders." He left again for the kitchen. Captain Falcon proceeded to pour Red's glass to the brim with alcohol. Red sniffed the drink carefully.
"Oh, don't worry Samus. Pit didn't make it, so it isn't gonna be poisoned. Besides, Peach decided to help out with dinner tonight." Captain Falcon held Red's hand tightly. Red suddenly realized that he would have to take off his helmet to eat or drink. He didn't know how he'd be able to talk without the voice changer implanted behind the helmet. Taking chances, he took off the helmet and gulped down the whole drink at once.
"Whoa, Samus. You must be brave to drink it all at once!" Captain Falcon laughed. The drink burned as it came down Red's throat. But, for some reason, it tasted good to him. He held out his glass and Captain Falcon happily refilled it.
"You still don't wanna drink the whole thing, though. You'll be belching the whole night!" Meta Knight finally arrived back at their table. He was busy fixing his blonde hair to try and make it not look like Elvis Presley's hairdo.
"Ahem, are you guys ready to order your appetizers?" He asked proudly. Captain Falcon nodded, and Red just stared into space.
"Ladies first," Captain Falcon winked at Red. Red sighed as he pointed out the chicken soup on his menu. Meta Knight glared.
"I thought they had banned the chicken soup, with Falco and all. Heh, okay then, just don't tell Falco." Meta Knight then looked at Captain Falcon.
"I'll have today's featured salad," he announced. Captain Falcon eating salad? Red only shook his head. There must be a lot of other things I don't know about him. Red was already finished his second glass and Captain Falcon was busy pouring him another.
"Oh, Samus. The way you look at me gives me strength." He told her. "I've never felt this much in love with someone before." Red shuddered. He was about to answer when he felt extremely drowsy.
Meta Knight watched as Peach and Pit worked together on dinner. "I see Pit has learned quite a lot about cooking," he remarked.
Pit scowled as he was cutting vegetables. "I would like to see you do better, Meta Knight." He watched as Peach prepared a pot full of water.
"Ah, don't worry about it, Pit. As soon as you're back in your own body again you'll be relieved of your cooking duties. But, it'll be awhile before we swap back, you know."
Pit was about to complain when he heard a crashing sound from the romance room. He looked at Meta Knight, who looked at Peach. The three rushed into the room to see the champagne bottle lying on the floor in glass shards.
Red's helmet was on the floor, and his eyes were heavily twitching. "It's okay, Falcon sweetie, I'm not drunk!" Everyone in the room gasped as they heard Red's voice. "I'm fine, perfectly fine!" He grabbed a hold of Captain Falcon's right hand. "Marry me, hottie!"
"Ack! You aren't Samus, but you are!" Captain Falcon pulled his toonish hand back. "Don't tell me you swapped with Samus like I did with Toon Link!" But Red didn't answer as he was busy pulling the tablecloth off. The candle fell on the hardwood floor and began to set it on fire. Pit grabbed Peach and dragged her into the kitchen.
"This is what happens when kids drink alcohol!" Meta Knight yelled as he grabbed a giant water pitcher and drenched the floor and Red in water. Looking up, Red threw up as he tried to get up, and collapsed instead. Meta Knight and Captain Falcon stared at each other.
"Next time let me know how I can tell a swapped from a real person, Meta!"
Red woke up in the hospital the next day. He was still in Samus' body and Power Suit, and his helmet was lying on the side table next to him. He could hear Mario screaming at the other Smashers from the hospital lobby.
Samus was standing by his hospital bed. "We messed up big time," she admitted as she held Squirtle in her arms. "But now I know Captain Falcon really was in love with me."
"I'm sorry for all this, you probably hated caring for my Pokemanz-"
"Oh no! It was quite enjoyable actually. Maybe I could do so for another few days..." Samus overheard Mario's yelling. "Well, unless Mario takes action on yesterday's incident." The two rolled their eyes as Mario banged on a table.
"I've never seen him this mad," Red groaned.
"Ah, he gets grumpy when he has to take care of the Smash Mansion himself."
"Then why don't any of the other Smashers help?" Samus thought over Red's question for a brief moment.
"Well, let's just say Mario wants to prove he's all that and trustworthy. Anyway, you'll be in the hospital for another few hours. Dr. Mario told us to never give you alcohol until you're 32, but we don't have to listen to him." She smiled once more before leaving again.
"Man," Red sighed. "I wish fun things like this happened more often!"
There ya go! Chapter four. This is probably my most T rated chapter yet, and thank goodness it isn't Yaoi. I'm not a fan of Yaoi unless it's well written, as I've seen quite a few good ones before. Anyway, continue to rate and review and suggest more swaps.
