(TW: Same trigger warning as Chapter 2, though it will NOT lead to an assault, I do know someone inappropriately hitting on someone inebriated can be triggering to some individuals and I would like to protect them with warning. THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT SO FAR EVERYONE, I've bee really touched by the follows and readership on my first published fanfiction.)

And It All Seemed Harmless: Chapter 3

"Are you alright Dr. T'Soni?"

"Hmmm?" Liara was yanked out of her own thoughts by the voice of the Turian before her. The Illium police officer had been typing away on his omni-tool moments ago, and she hadn't even noticed he had been speaking to her while he did.

"I was just checking to see if you are alright ma'am. You've sort of been going in and out while I've been talking to you..."

Liara cringed inwardly, she had been hoping her disinterest in the man's interview hadn't been too obvious. She had so many other things to worry about in her search for the Shadow Broker, and an interview on what she knew about the whereabouts of her missing assistant was certainly not a priority. But, it was still in accordance with her reputation to be attentive.

"Well, officer, as you can imagine, I am a very busy woman. It shouldn't come as a surprise to you that I have a lot on my mind, and would like to finish this interview as expeditiously as possible."

The officer nodded and let the subject drop out of respect, though the asari could tell he hadn't bought a word of it.

"Fair enough. I think I've gotten a pretty good statement from you on all you know about the whereabouts of one Nyxeris."He said, grossly mispronouncing her former assistant's name.

Liara tried to hide her annoyment. The policeman had obviously not received an impressive education, and his interest in the case seemed forced at best. He was just wasting her time. But if this was the best the Illium police force had to investigate her assistant's mysterious disappearance, then she would have a lot less clean-up work to do to disguise her crime than she had thought.

"Thank for your time Doctor, if you find anything else, feel free to contact me. I'll forward my contact information to your office later."

"Farewell." Liara said dismissedly as she was finally able to turn her attention to the blinking monitor on her desk. Her display was littered with alerts, her various informants all vying for attention and funds in exchange for their information. She scanned them quickly. None were the message she had been waiting for regarding the Shadow Broker's various connections on Illium, but a particular message in the corner of her screen caught her eye.

Subject: COMMANDER SHEPARD

Her heart stopped just seeing the name. Admittedly, she both loved and hated to get news about Shepard. Love being because any news meant her love was still alive, and hate being because any news about Shepard was rarely good news. The soldier was always putting herself in danger, and though it was a bit morbid, Liara always read any message concerning Shepard for fear it would be the message alerting her that soldier was once again gone. In truth, she didn't know what she would do if she ever received that message. Even though she had lived through Shepard's death once, she wasn't positive she could again. Even with the separation and intense precautions she had taken to keep herself from getting hurt this time, the soldier invaded her thoughts more than was strictly healthy. And she never had the heart to push her out of her mind. Not after she had already pushed her out of her life...

Liara immediately banished the memories of their last meeting as they surfaced. What was done was done, no matter how much time she spent regretting it, she had been the one to make Shepard go. Shepard wouldn't give up her suicide mission for her and Liara was not about to go through it all again when her love finally made it to the Collector base. If anybody could survive it was Shepard...but Shepard was not invincible. Shepard had died.

It was silly, holding a grudge for something the Commander had had no control over, but there were moments she absolutely hated the Commander for dying. For leaving her, for making her get in that escape pod without her. The memory of those fatal few minutes had haunted the young asari for two years, tainting her dreams and breaking her over and over again. Those few minutes had changed her over the past two years, changed her into someone she wasn't exactly proud to be. And though she knew it was unreasonable, she blamed Shepard for that change. Because if she hadn't left... Goddess, who would she be today?

Liara sighed. She had more than enough reasons to wish that the Spectre had never died. If she hadn't, Liara would have been able to continue travelling on the Normandy two years ago, rather than coming to Illium to make a living as an information broker. If she hadn't, her bitter feud with the Shadow Broker wouldn't exist and Feron wouldn't have been captured and most likely killed by the devious Broker. But to Liara's dismay, she knew the biggest reason was still, and would always be, that she loved Shepard, and had never been, maybe would never be, strong enough to lose her. She cursed silently, blaming the Goddess, blaming the whole galaxy for the unfair situation she was currently in, and had been in for years: in love with a doomed soldier. A human no less.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the message, fighting down her fear that she had an unhealthy obsession with Shepard with reminders that she was still Shepard's friend. She had a duty to look out for her just like she would Garrus or Tali.

She sighed in relief. Her agent wasn't asking for many credits for the information, which meant it likely wasn't too important. Shepard was okay then. She allowed the relief to wash over her and purchased the information regardless. Even if it was unimportant, it still concerned Shepard. Several long minutes passed before a log of ships docked in the Illium docking bay appeared on her screen, fresh from her agent. She scrolled through it quickly, eyes darting through the information before she saw a log for the Normandy SR-2. It had arrived at 18:02 hours, and was still currently docked.

Her heart started pounding in her chest, and she allowed herself to fantasize for a moment that Shepard was here to see her. That she would open the doors of her office to see her love clad in her N7 armor and a smirk that never failed to weaken her knees. She smiled at the thought for a moment before the memory of the last time Shepard had been in her office finally seeped into her mind.

"Wouldn't what? Wouldn't want somebody to know that you fucked me?"

"Shepard!"

She cringed at the memory of the Spectre's words. The mere idea that Shepard would think that she was ashamed of what they had been broke her heart. She loved the Spectre, she wouldn't have minded telling the whole galaxy, but things were different now. She was different. But when Shepard had walked out of her office that day, for what was most likely the last time, she was the shy young scientist from Thessia all over again. A heartbroken maiden crying over her love for an entire day…

She shook herself out of her reverie and began to assess the situation. Shepard had already recruited the two team members from her dossiers that were located on Illium, but Shepard would not have flown all the way to Illium had she not had a purpose. A purpose that wasn't her.

Another alert lit up her screen. She moved to dismiss it before she noticed that it was also labeled with the name of her love.

Subject: Overlord: Cerberus: possible Spectre Shepard involvement

She clicked on it quickly and was dismayed to see that this piece of information was very expensive. Something bad then. Though the message only alluded to the possibility that Shepard had been involved, she knew the Spectre well enough not to expect anything other than full involvement in the situation. Shepard had most likely been there, but not spotted enough. She forwarded the credits, ignoring the large total. She knew she would spend every penny she had if it meant keeping Shepard safe. She cringed at that knowledge. That was certainly not something a person trying to get over their former love should be thinking.

The information arrived quickly. It was a Cerberus mission report that had no mention of Shepard, but her agent had included a note that any mentioned "Cerberus personnel" was rumored to have been the Commander. She sighed in annoyance. So Cerberus labelled her as just another piece of personnel. She still hated it that Cerberus acted as if Shepard was just another tool. Another weapon bought and paid for. And I condemned Shepard to that life.

From: Cerberus Command

Project Overlord concerning the geth was shut down by Cerberus Personnel earlier today. The interfaced Virtual Intelligence had gone rogue, and instead of salvaging progress, ground Cerberus Personnel chose to eliminate the project. This will set advances in Geth technology back several years. Chief Scientist Dr. Gavin Archer is to report to the Illusive Man after cleanup of the Atlas facility.

Transaction Summary:

Grissom Academy - contacted

Casualties:

-All but Chief Scientist Archer and the test subject

Liara's stomach churned at the summary. She hated Cerberus' clear apathy when it came to the loss of lives. In a research facility, there had likely been hundreds of scientist working. To lose all but two...oh goddess Shepard.

Her love was seen as a renegade. A stone soldier that never allowed her heart to get in the way of her duty. But when Liara had joined with Shepard, had been with Shepard, she had felt the sheer compassion and guilt the soldier harbored every day. She blamed herself for every life lost and the faces of those she couldn't save screamed at her in her dreams. If Shepard had walked into a facility with hundreds already dead, she likely wouldn't be sleeping very well for quite some time. She knew the mind of her love, she would be thinking of all the ways she could've saved them for days, wishing she had gotten there sooner, wishing she was more than she was. Liara sighed, overwhelmed with an urge to go to Shepard and make sure she was all right. Hold the soldier like she used to, sending comfort and acceptance through the meld. That was the only way she had been able to stop her Commander's nightmares about Akuze, the only way she kept the Commander's mind off the alcohol she kept stashed below her bed. She wasn't sure if Shepard ever even knew she was aware of its presence below them when she slept, but there were no secrets in the meld, and she didn't blame her love for turning to alcohol sometimes. She wasn't sure she wouldn't be able to had she lived even a fraction of Shepard's life.

Self-hatred stabbed her when she realized it was possible for her to go to the Spectre and take care of her like she used to right now, and yet she wouldn't. She was on Illium, and though Liara still didn't understand why the Spectre was here, she was here nonetheless. And she wouldn't be going to help her.

Their relationship was over. Shepard would most likely be uninterested in seeing her and even if she agreed to be around her, a meld was far too personal a thing to share with someone you didn't trust. Tears welled up in her eyes and she cursed herself for having the nerve to feel so helpless when her position was entirely self-induced. She clapped her hand over her mouth and sobbed quietly, hating herself for being in distress when Shepard was the one who was probably hurting.

Taking a deep breath, she returned her attention to her monitor and resolved to find some way to help Shepard regardless, even if Shepard wouldn't know who was helping her. It was unlikely Shepard would undertake another mission tonight, so she was either on the Normandy, or exploring Illium. Or worse a bar. She pushed the thought out of her head, silently praying that Shepard wouldn't return to her alcohol-dependent ways as she pulled up the feeds from Illium security cameras around where the Normandy was docked. After a few minutes of fast-forwarding, her love sauntered out of the ship alone, wearing a plain Cerberus uniform that curiously, had no Cerberus logos attached. In one glance, Liara could immediately tell just how bad her Spectre was hurting. The soldier's commanding demeanor was lost, replaced by a sagging shoulders and a quick walk to escape notice. She didn't even look up, her red hair protecting all facial expression that would likely give away her strong emotions. Pain washed over Liara's heart at the sight. She had always hated to see her love broken. The woman who gave everything to help others always seemed to never get any help herself. A tiny bit of her was glad she couldn't see the Spectre's face, she wasn't sure she could handle it.

After sifting through cameras and recreating Shepard's path, Liara's heart sank when she realized it ended at Eternity. Shepard wasted no time in crossing the room to where the bartender stood, and Liara frowned when she saw the drink Shepard selected. Oh goddess Shepard be careful. Stop it Liara, she's a grown woman. She commands a ship, I think she can remember not to go overboard drinking. Shepard and the bartender Liara recognized as Matriarch Aethyta, spoke quietly as the Spectre drank. Liara strained to hear them, but the bar was too loud for any reliable audio feeds. She gave up and just watched the Spectre, amazed once again at the mostly brave face the soldier bared to the Matriarch. Liara surveyed Shepard, it didn't look like she was carrying a weapon. She sighed, knowing that if she and Shepard had still been together, she would've chastised her for doing so. Shepard had quite the knack at getting shot at, the least she could do would be to stay prepared so she could shoot back.

At least, she had to admit the bar didn't look too dangerous. Cameras were everywhere so it was definitely much safer than a seedy bar in the Wards or Omega, and most of the patrons seemed saintly in comparison to the crude personalities Liara had met while drinking at Flux with Shepard and Garrus. In the corner, a bachelor party involving a human, turian, and salarian was taking place, and Liara was relieved to see none of them had any interest in Shepard.

However, on the other side of the room, a table full of Alliance marines was toasting something, but their glances kept straying to rest on Shepard. Marines are harmless she thought pointedly, the Alliance practically worships Shepard and they're probably just starstruck. She prayed silently that none of them would have more than a professional interest in Shepard before one of them disappointed her by making an obscene gesture towards Shepard while speaking with his friend.

Liara tried to ignore the anger that coursed through her at the soldiers, the idea of warping all of them into another galaxy somewhat appealing, but she knew it wasn't her place to be possessive anymore. Shepard could do whatever she pleased, even if Liara knew she wouldn't even be able to stand watching Shepard touch someone else. She blinked back tears, fear seizing her heart with the thought that Shepard actually could go home with one of them, before the bartender directed Shepard's attention to them, which was rewarded with a look of disgust. Liara breathed a sigh of relief. At the very least Shepard is not interested in one of them.

As Liara began to survey the bar, she noticed a great deal of the patrons were interested in Shepard. Even the asari "entertainment" had taken notice to the attractive woman sitting alone at the bar. Jealousy surged through Liara, and before she could control herself, her biotics surged, knocking back nearly everything in her office. She knew some of the other offices would complain, but she hardly noticed. She skipped through the video, rushing to the most current feeds to avoid angering herself unnecessarily at the sight of the nearly the entire bar ogling her love.

She couldn't keep track of how much Shepard had drank by the time an asari approached her, but if the bottles along the bar were any indication, it was way too much. As the asari stepped close to the human, pure hatred surged through Liara. That asari has been hanging around the bar with an eye on Shepard all night, and she chooses to approach her after she is thoroughly inebriated? Liara raved in her head disgustedly. She turned the audio up, trying her hardest to hear through all the commotion anything the other asari might be saying to the Commander, but she only caught bits and pieces. The bit she did hear however, made her sick. The asari had definitely said something about a "back room" and to her complete horror, Shepard was agreeing.

As Shepard stood and stumbled to the back room, and Liara felt her eyes well up with tears. Oh goddess, please don't Shepard. Goddess no. The asari hadn't even bothered to help Shepard to the room and Liara wanted nothing more but to go down there and shatter her skull with that shotgun Wrex had given her so long ago. The asari exchanged a few words with the bartender, and Liara felt a wave of uneasiness creep over her when the bartender dumped the drink she had made for Shepard and started making another one. One that definitely didn't look like what Shepard had been drinking. Bitch! Liara growled and pushed her desk to the floor as she stood, pacing back and forth and in her office.

Shepard was a grown woman, if she wanted to have sex with that asari whore, that was purely her choice. But, Shepard was obviously far too intoxicated to make a choice like that for herself and there's something off about her drink. That bitch of a bartender probably roofied her she thought with pure malice. Making up her mind in a matter of seconds, Liara grabbed her pistol and rushed out of her office, severely hoping that she hadn't noticed what was going on too late.