And It All Seemed Harmless: Chapter 10
What the fuck is that noise…
Shepard winced as she lifted her head from the thin sheet spread on the couch underneath her, her neck straining from the activity as if gravity had intensified to hold the spectre's body from motion. A low beeping noise sounded again from somewhere in the soldier's earshot, barely audible in an average situation, but to the commander's pounding head, the noise was piercing. Involuntarily, the spectre let out a low groan as she surveyed her environment. Her vision was blurry, the objects around her a variety of colors and shapes the soldier couldn't seem to force into focus. This wasn't the first time the commander had opened her eyes to an unfamiliar environment, the soldier often found herself in difficult situations that sometimes involved waking up in the hands of the enemy or in a clinic closest to the battlefield. And, despite her experience with the unexpected, the commander loathed waking up confused, knowing that with enemies like the ones she had earned, confusion could be her death.
Taking a deep breath, Shepard lowered her head, deciding to narrow her eyes and feign unconsciousness as much as she could while her vision returned. To Shepard's relief, her sight returned in just under a minute, the blurriness clearing to the edges of her vision and then completely as the seconds passed.
This doesn't look like a prison…
Shepard mused, taking in the view before her. The soldier, to her surprise, was not laying on the floor of a horrid prison or warehouse, but a luxury couch covered with a thin blue sheet. Another blanket was bunched at the spectre's feet, and an ottoman was pushed close to the couch, a thin water bottle atop the small piece of furniture. Shepard scowled, it was definitely an apartment, and she didn't know what the fuck she would be doing in an apartment.
How did I get here….
To her dismay, the soldier has no idea. Trying to remember makes her head throb more, as if her brain was trying to tell her she didn't want to know what had happened in the last twelve hours. Her last clear memory involves a bar stool, and a smart ass asari handing her another drink she now regrets taking.
I stopped drinking like that. God fucking dammit Shepard!
The spectre practically screams at herself internally. It was true, the Alliance soldier has spent a lot of her early Alliance service with a headache as brutal as the one she had now, but the N7 program had been a punch to the face for the soldier in realizing how self-destructive her behavior had been. And with a new purpose and rank, she had stopped drinking. For a while at least. Though, not being one for denial, the commander was frighteningly aware that her drinking had started to escalate again as pain from the suicide mission and rejection from her old colleagues had mounted. The only comfort the soldier had was that she had yet to blackout from the alcohol and risk her life as she used to so carelessly. But coming to terms with her lack of memory, the soldier's comfort was gone.
How's a mess like me supposed to bring a team back from a suicide mission…
As Shepard began to feel a wave of disgust for herself enter her mind, she felt another comforting presence, probing softly at her halestorm of thoughts with calming feelings. In panic, Shepard quickly blocked the presence, her throbbing mind making it hard to discern much about it other than it was a foreign presence close to her mind, and yet, other than her mind. As the soldier pushed out the other feelings, she heard a small noise, soft yet very close to her, and it startled the spectre considerably. In a panic, Shepard sat up, not quite prepared for another being to complicate her morning confusion further, though the soldier's back immediately rejected her sudden movement. A web of pain shot through the commander's muscles, and Shepard stifled a groan and paused for just a moment. The soldier taking a deep breaths in an attempt to ignore her body's annoyance with her decision to not heed Ms. Karin Chakwas' directions the night before.
Scanning around in an attempt to isolate the source of the other noise, the soldier is disappointed. There is not another being in sight, and the room is empty besides two other couches, one piled high with a mess of blankets, and a few decorative plants. Standing gingerly, the soldier bounces on her legs for a moment, allowing feeling to return to her tingling feet, and quietly steps away from her resting place from the night. Though a part of Shepard wanted to run for the front door, get as far away from the mysterious place and make a date with her bed in the Normandy, the spectre sensed there was more to her being taken to this place, and if nothing else, she wanted answers to why someone had been probing at her mind.
Assuming combat position, Shepard stalks out of the room, her hand drifting to her side for her weapon only to find she had not brought one. The soldier cursed herself. It had not been the worst idea in the galaxy to dress as a civilian when going to the bar to avoid detection. The vanguard commander had some of the most impressive biotic skills in the Alliance and could defend herself without a sidearm. However, low on eezo and severely dehydrated, the soldier wondered how effective she really could be if combat was necessary. Deciding to exercise even more caution to avoid finding out the answer to the question of her biotic effectiveness, the soldier stalks forward slowly, passing a small office nook hidden behind the staircase, lit only by orange monitors flashing streams of information the soldier couldn't quite make out from so far away. Another beep sounds, a bit louder this time, alerting the spectre to the source of the noise that had reverberated off her skull since she had awoken. As she began to edge towards the office and the noise, the soldier detected motion out of the corner of her eye, the large pile of blankets on one couch moving slightly, causing the commander to pivot on her feet, facing the couch as if it could attack her. As the soldier stands motionless for several seconds, the couch does not move again, prompting Shepard to edge towards it, resolving to find whatever it was before it found her.
Moving only on the balls of her feet, any combatant would struggle to hear the vanguard approach, and she crosses the room in only a few seconds, absolutely silent. Upon closer inspection, the blankets are less a pile, and more a wrapping, folded around a presence the spectre can hardly make out. Only a square of blue skin peeks out from below a corner of one of the comforters. Calling her biotics to charge, the spectre's body begins to glow blue, preparing the commander to attack any unwelcome presence, but as her hand gently guides the fold away to reveal the other apartment occupant, Shepard's biotics fizzle away in an instant as she is faced with the last person in the galaxy she was ready to interact with, Liara T'Soni.
The soldier takes a step back in shock, tears flooding to her eyes though she refuses to let them fall, embarrassed at the effect just the sight of the other woman had on her.
Why...why am I in Liara's apartment…
Since reuniting with the asari, however sour their interactions had been, the soldier had longed to be with Liara, on the Normandy or wherever the asari had made her home in the spectre's absence. However, her throbbing head and only memory from the night before paralyzed the soldier with fear, thousands of negative intoxicated scenarios playing through her mind, all trying to explain how the spectre could have possibly ended up on her ex-lover's couch for the night.
God, I hope I didn't get drunk and find her. Who knows what I would have said to her...
Shepard could not help but fear what an inebriated version of herself could have possibly said to the asari. Though the soldier was not an angry drunk, her frustration with the information broker's inability to talk to her could very likely have bubbled to a head after the commander's horrible day yesterday, and Shepard desperately hoped she hadn't been cruel to the asari. Or worse, done something to ruin any chance of a friendship.
Leaning forward to peer over her ex-lover's face once more, a small smile crosses the spectre's features, starkly contrasting the tears filling her eyes. She can't help but smile as she looks at the peaceful asari, the sight almost causing her to forget all the questions racing through her mind. The soldier starts to scold herself for the reaction, frustrated by the fact that just seeing the asari seemed to solidify the commander would never be able to look into that blue face and not view anything other than the woman she loved. The soldier is only broken out of her frustrated thoughts by an observation, one that pierces the soldier's heart on sight. There are drying tears on the asari's face, streams that even though thin, don't belong there in the spectre's book. Like a punch to the chest, the soldier is breathless with pain, realizing her presence could very well have caused those tears.
Why did she bring me here, I always make her cry.
Shepard shakes her head, disappointed with herself for everything. For the mission, for her death, for deciding it was a good fucking idea to get drunk in Nos Astra, so close to the asari.
Was she at the bar?
Shepard questions herself, desperately searching her memory for any fragments of the asari.
I don't think so...the only asari were Aethyta and that….oh God.
Nausea hits the soldier like a concussive blast as another segment of her night returns to her. Another asari had invited Shepard to join her in the back room, and the spectre had accepted the invitation. Holy shit holy shit what did I do... Shepard screams internally, grabbing the sides of her head and letting out a quiet curse. If Liara had been in the bar to find her so intoxicated, had she found her in a compromising position with another asari? That could explain the tears….God I didn't want to sleep with her, I was so spaced, why did I get so spaced?!
Shepard continued to internally berate herself, convinced that if she had been anywhere but Liara's home she would be punching something to escape the mental pain. The Commander was not in any way deluded into thinking Liara was still in love with her, but there had been something there, a trace of affection and care that hadn't faded, only shown to the spectre in the raw kiss the asari had planted on the soldier upon first glance on Illium. That small trace of affection was what kept the spectre going through her everyday life, though from the tears on her love's face, she knew that trace had been detonated like a land mind, leaving nothing but hurt.
I should go, I can't keep hurting her.
Shepard decides solemnly, tucking the blankets closer around the asari as she remembered the scientist preferred, her head screaming at her to kiss the asari goodbye and yet she can't, she won't do that to Liara. When satisfied the asari would be comfortable, the spectre turns on her heel to leave. As she begins to make her way to the front door, trying to keep focused only on her escape and not the asari behind her she wanted to hold until the tears dried, the alert on the terminal catches her attention again. Though the beep had consistently sounded, this time the soldier notices an alert message spreading across the screen, stopping Shepard in her tracks. With a sigh, she jogs over to the terminal, deciding only to look because if the asari was in imminent danger and the soldier had left without a second glance at the warning that could have saved her, she could never forgive herself.
Leaning over the terminal, the spectre's eyes narrow as she see the keyword the asari had tagged for alert. Shepard.
Oh goddammit… Shepard sighs. So Liara had been monitoring information about her, even going so far as to create an alert when another broker was auctioning information about the soldier. So she does...well DID still think about me…
Peering over her shoulder to make sure the asari had not crept up behind her, the soldier decides to open the information, confident she had enough credits in her own personal chit to use as payment for whatever information had leaked on Illium about the spectre. Especially if it involved any information about the soldier's previous night.
With a click on the alert, the beeping stops, and an auction page opens, the information broker selling the information tagged "Shepard" fielding offers from various agents in a messaging interface. Scrolling to the last message sent, Shepard releases a long sigh. Why did I expect anything to go right today ...
The information was clearly about Shepard's currently location, the broker had been boasting in the messages that they had camera sources from several locations on the current planet on which the spectre was located. Though Shepard felt a pinge of dread from the statement, wondering what camera sources were the ones detailing her night, the message that truly unsettled her was just below it. The information had been sold, to a buyer who only identified by an ID number belonging to a system of credentials defined by the messenger's own unidentified employer.
Wait a minute...I know those numbers... Shepard leaned forward and tapped her omni tool, her own Cerberus ID number flashing across the screen as the soldier called for it. Both numbers were similar in structure, CD the prefix for the identification of both. So Cerberus bought it….or someone from Cerberus… With a few taps on her tool, Shepard accesses the Cerberus database, flipping through pages hurriedly until she found the one she required at the moment, the employee identification database. With a glance at the other terminal, the soldier punches in the number, results displaying instantly on the tool. The information takes the soldier's breath like a punch to the gut.
The number belonged to Dr. Gavin Archer, chief scientist, Project Overlord.
In a moment the spectre's heartbeat begins to race, and she's back in the lab.
Staring, just staring at Archer's brother as he hung from the skin piercing machines, tears streaming down his face as the tendrils of a machine arm hold his eyes open.
"Shepard!" David cries, his sobs choking his words. "Help…"
The soldier leaps into action, bounding towards the terminal on the far side of the room she hopes has the power of releasing him, but she doesn't make it there. Dr. Archer grabs the soldier, pinning her against the wall and though the spectre knows she should be able to easily overpower the scientist, she is unable.
"Let me go you're killing him!" Shepard screams, and Archer flashes the commander a smirk.
"You don't know that Shepard….you should only know that we need him. Millions will die if he does not stay here Commander, David is our path to controlling the geth, without him those machines will take many lives, as they have tried to take yours."
"NO!" Shepard screams, and she attempts to drive her omni tool into the scientist's neck, the scientist managing to evade with barely a motion, the soldier failing miserably.
"Don't struggle so much Commander, I'm not the one who put him here. You are."
"That's a lie!" Shepard shrieks, finally throwing the scientist to the ground. And before Shepard can restrain herself, she's beating the man, fist after fist brutally colliding with the scientist. When the scientist grows motionless, the soldier finally stops, her breath fast as she struggles to find any semblance of calm, her entire body shaking above the still scientist.
"It's a lie…" She sobs, looking at her blood stained fists. And with an eerie, slow motion, Archer's head lifts from the ground, spitting blood at the soldier as he speaks.
"Cerberus did this Commander….and you're Cerberus now."
Shepard snaps out of her flashback with a sob, crumpling to the ground as her body gives way. Tears are streaming down the spectre's face though she doesn't allow herself to make a sound, unwilling to wake the asari that didn't deserve the burden of comforting the monster of a soldier who had invaded her home. Taking a deep breath, the soldier wills herself to her feet, nausea once again attacking her as she stands. Oh God….I'm really going to puke this time….
Swiftly moving out of the office, Shepard peers past the staircase for a bathroom and only sees a kitchen, so immaculate the spectre couldn't imagine touching even the waste can. Praying she might survive the trek that seemed her only other option, the soldier jogs up the winding stairs, to her relief locating the bathroom moments after reaching the landing.
Shepard barely has a moment to shut the door before she's hanging her head in the toilet, shaking as her nausea leaves her body.
