Chapter Two
"Why is the Rum Gone? Pt. II"
Elizabeth awoke to the sun in her eyes, while resting on Jack's arm. He shifted beside her as she looked at him, and then she double blinked. A scream was heard from her mouth as she was confused to what happened the night before.
"CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW!!!!!!!"
Jack awoke to the sound of her screaming, piercing his eardrums. "What, what is it?" he said springing forth from the sand. "What, what?!"
"You are a horrible man," she said as she raised her hand to slap his cheek, but she didn't. "Look at all these rum bottles, Jack. Look at them! You drank them all!"
"I drank them? Excuse me, Elizabeth, but you drank them too."
"THAT'S MISS SWANN TO YOU, JACK SPARROW!" Elizabeth said, rising to her feet and kicking sand as she stomped away.
"Captain…" he corrected. He got up and followed her. "Where are you going?" He saw her heading towards the cache.
"Getting rid of this abomination of a drink," she said, gathering the bottles.
"Oh no you don't," Jack said, taking them from her hands. "We only have four bottles left, and we are not getting rid of them. Waste not, want not… I think."
"Fine," she said crossing her arms. "Then what do you suppose we do with them?"
Jack raised an eyebrow.
Five minutes later.
"Ay, merry may we be, the pirate king as beautiful as she, and Yo ho and really bad eggs, we take the rum as we kick our legs!" Elizabeth giggled as she found herself dancing around the sand, rum in hand. "Ay, ay. I made a song, Jack! I made a beautiful song!
Jack looked at her with a smile. "So you did. Now, let's drink some more." He clinked their glasses. "Elizabeth, you really are a great pirate." He took off his hat and placed it on her head. "You could be my first mate…er, maiden. My first maiden."
"Yes, I shall! I'll be your first maiden, and you're second in hand to the crew! We'll sail together, one by one, together forever and search all the scallywags and be the greatest duo ever to sail the seven seas." Elizabeth rest her head on his shoulder. "And we could be married together, because I love you, Jack Sparrow!"
Jack looked at her quizzically. "…Ay?"
"Yes, yes. Married. Do it now. Marry us, you are a captain, you must know some duties of being a priest! Marry us now!"
"But…I…"
"DO IT NOW!"
After five minutes later and many sips of rum.
"…And so I pronounce thee, husband and wife, you may…kiss the bride—oh wait, that's us," Jack said, as he laughed. "Ay, kiss the bride." He kissed Elizabeth as they fell onto the sand. He pulled away and sipped more rum.
"You are amazing, Jack. I love you—rum. I love rum."
"I love rum, too."
Elizabeth lay on the sand and stretched out. "Sleepy time. Sleepy…"
"Yes, sleepy. Very sleepy, love."
"I am tired."
"Rum does that. Gives you good dreams. Dream well, poppet."
"Ay, dream well…pop?"
Jack laughed. He snuggled next to her; Elizabeth snuggled back.
The next morning.
"Argh…" Elizabeth groaned as she woke up, feeling very groggy and hung over. She looked up to the sky and saw the sun high in the sky, as she found Jack beside her. Rum bottles, two, were scattered next to them.
"CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW!!!"
"Yes?" Jack said, waking up.
"You drank again! And so did I? What happened?"
"Love, I don't know."
Elizabeth rubbed her eyes, but felt something scratchy on her finger; she looked to see a piece of grass entwined around her ring finger.
"Jack…why is there a blade a glass around my ring finger?" she asked, looking at him.
"..I…don't—oh. I know why."
Elizabeth raised her hand to slap him, but he moved away. "We're married?!"
"I think so, yes."
"Reverse it! Reverse it, reverse it!" she screamed.
"Only one way to do that, love."
"And that is…?"
Five minutes later.
"Ay, you're right. I do like being Elizabeth Sparrow-Swann! It feels so good to be married! Finally!" Elizabeth shouted cheerfully.
"Yes, love. I told you so. Drink more. Be merry. For that is the last of the rum."
Elizabeth stopped dancing. "What? What do you mean the last of the rum?" She walked towards him. "We must get more! More rum!"
"There is no more rum. The rum is gone. Gone, gone, gone, love. Non-existent. Incoherent. Extinct."
"No!!" Elizabeth whined. "We must have more! The rum is not gone!"
"Only one place where rum is…"
"Where?!"
"Tortuga. Loads of it," Jack said.
Elizabeth locked arms with him. "To Tortuga!"
"We have no means of transportation, love. We are stuck here, with one pistol and one bullet, and one heavily drunken woman named Elizabeth Sparrow-Swann." Jack said as he examined his hat. "I do not know what do now. We will surely die here."
Elizabeth looked at her rum bottle. She had a lot left. "Save this."
"Alright…"
Elizabeth fell to the ground and fell asleep.
"Um…" Jack said as she looked at the rum. Tempting… Should he drink it?
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