IV.

"Raped?" Alex breathed. His eyes were open wide and his mouth stood open. "How? Why?" His eyes moved rapidly and to Claire, who knew him quite well, it seemed as if he was already searching for the man. She reached out for him and put one hand onto his arm.

She glanced at him. "Alex, don't, you hear me?"

"What?"

"You know what I mean. Calm down." Her voice sounded strange. Tess looked at her and frowned.

Claire got up and walked across the room. "Anyone another beer?"

"Yes!" came from Tess and Alex in unison. Claire went into the kitchen and came back with 3 bottles of the homemade beer that Alex had brought with him the other day.

All three of them opened up a bottle each and drank. Alex drained his bottle in almost one long sip. Then he stood up and walked towards the doorway.

"Where are you going?" Claire asked.

"I want to see if she's alright…" said Alex and looked at her.

In his eyes Claire and Tess saw something they've never seen before, something that came close to a mixture of sadness and agony, and Claire bit back any other comment she had been wanting to say. She let him go and watched him walk up the stairs with his head hanging low and his back bent as if it was his fault. But it wasn't. It hadn't been his fault. He had found her and brought her here, he probably had saved her.

But Claire understood. Alex had probably never had to deal with the topic rape in his life before, but Claire, after having met Becky, had learned about that. Alex would have to learn now too, and learn it the hard way. Although she felt a slight pang of jealousy, she realized that Alex began to feel for the girl. And when she now saw him disappear up the stairs, she had to sigh. Tess turned around and looked at her inquiringly, but Claire did not say anything and turned back to her beer.

"Are you alright?" Tess asked.

"Yeah!" made Claire and took a long sip.

Alex opened the door quietly and stepped in. The regular breathing calmed him down immediately, but when he saw the pale and bruised face with all those cuts, all the anger came back. He sat down on the edge of the bed and took her hand. Even though she was unconscious, Alex thought that he felt a slight pressure on his hand from her hand and he moved a little closer. For the first time now he realized that she had long blond hair and a petite face. Meg must have washed away the dirt and mud so that she now looked quite clean. She slept deeply, but it was not an easy sleep.

Alex hesitated at first, then released her hand and put his hand against her now warm cheek. In her sleep she turned her head and pushed slightly against his caressing hand. Quickly Alex pulled back his hand and breathed in and out to calm down again. With one last glance at her, he stood up from the bed and went to the door. He turned off the light and closed the door behind him, making sure that the girl was fast asleep.

When he came down into the living room, Tess and Claire had already left, they had probably gone to bed. He checked the time and realized that it was almost 4 am. He was deadly tired, but in his head the thoughts were running around wild. What was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to talk to her now, if she ever woke up?

He knew that Becky had been raped but she was a little tomboy, to him she was only Becky, nothing more. He tried to convince himself that this strange girl was also only someone, and not someone he felt for. But his heart knew better. Alex was a man who never thought about things longer than only a few seconds and then did it and his heart now did the same thing. It did not let itself be talked into not feeling for her, and Alex finally understood.