VIII.

Once Alyssa arrived in the kitchen, Meg asked her to run over to Becky's apartment to get her. She had not responded to the calls. Alyssa ran over to the bungalows but she was nowhere to be found outside.

"Becky?" she yelled but got no answer.

She sneaked around the low building and finally found her, inside her room. She saw her through the window and called for her before she opened to door.

"Becky?" asked Alyssa. "Dinner is on the table. Meg sends me to…" She stuck her head through the open door and watched Becky quickly hide the picture behind her back.

"Becky?" Alyssa asked again. "Are you alright?"

Becky sobbed. "No, I'm not…"

"Who is this?" Alyssa asked.

Becky did not reply, she did not even more anymore. Her eyes were tied to the person on the picture and slowly filled up with tears.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" Alyssa stepped over to her and put a hand onto her shoulder.

"Brett…" murmured Becky.

"Brett? Where is he?" asked Alyssa.

"He's dead…I found him…under the bridge…"

Alyssa frowned. "I am sorry, I didn't know…"

"Well, it's alright. It's been a few weeks now." Becky smiled through her tears. "I'll get over it…Don't worry. I'll be alright."

"You sure will…" said Alyssa and smiled. "But you'll always remember him. He will always be here in your heart, believe me."

Becky smiled sadly. "I think about him all the time. He helped me so much to cope with my life…" She glanced sideways.

"Cope?" Alyssa asked.

"Brett was always there for me. I have never experienced anything like that before. My life had not been good before I came here and when I then met him, it suddenly became so clear to me that all I've been doing until then was nothing real and phoney. It may sound completely crazy, but he showed me what I am worth…and now that he's not here anymore, it's hard for me to focus on what he taught me."

"Oh…" was all Alyssa could say.

"Well, yeah…" Becky sat down on the bed. "You have to know, Alyssa, during the time that Brett was gone and I didn't know that he was already dead, I met someone. Jake. He works on Killarney. He tried so hard to help me get over it. At first it was the pain of Brett not coming back although he had promised it to me, and then his death was very hard to digest, as you may understand." Becky was trying hard to avoid any direct questions but she felt that Alyssa was just about to share her secret with her. But she still had to be careful, she thought, and decided not to tell the girl what happened to her when she was 15, at least not now. There would come a time, Becky was sure.

Alyssa nodded. "I lost my mother when I was 12. But I think it's something different when you lose someone you love so much. I've loved my mother a lot, but well…it must have been different with Brett…"

"Maybe it was, who knows. Only one thing is for sure here. I've gotten over it and maybe you will, too."

"I miss my mom but it's nothing that still irritates me. The first year was hard but I had my father and my horses." She flashed the other girl a shy smile. "Although I sometimes wish that she hadn't left me so all alone…You have Claire and Tess, and Jodi and Meg, and also Jake."

"You're not alone anymore, we're all here for you." Becky smiled. "And I'm sure that you can stay as long as you want. You're safe here." She saw Alyssa clench her jaws. What was there? Every time she something like this, Alyssa closed up. Becky quickly changed the subject. "Well, I found my very own home, right here on Drover's. There may come a time when you find your home as well. Maybe even here. Things change all the time, and you can't do anything against that. Tears will dry as time goes by. I've learned it and so will you. Trust me, ok?" Becky smiled.

Alyssa nodded and returned her smile, even if Becky felt a little odd seeing it. "Sure. I just need time."