CRAP!
Ziggy: What?
I'm outta Avatar episodes! Crap!
Ziggy: Why don't you just wing it? People read this for entertainment, not for insightful parodies.
Chazz: I wonder if people read this...
Adam: If they are, I wonder if they know who I am...
Ayame: Pickles...

Zuko: Is it my job to do the disclaimers or something?
Rick: Yep.
Zuko: -sigh- Mo does not own anything. She's poor. Brown trash, actually.
Rick: ... She's going to smite you...
Zuko: BRING IT ON!

(Begin Transmission)

Dear Diary,

I'm Lois Lane.

Love,

Lois Lane, a.k.a Superman's Wench

0

Dear Diary,

Still wondering who the hell that blind broad is.

Do you think she's the Avatar's girlfriend? I mean, they must be the same age. And the Water Tribe wench is like... 14. So if you think about it... 112 is really old. Hm, maybe if I jump into an ice cube and wake up 100 years later, I can have my own band of Merry Men! AND I CAN PLAY THE ELECTRIC TRIANGLE!

... What's electric?

Love,

Lindsey Lohan

0

Dear Diary,

I tried to explain my theory of electricity to Uncle, but he just stared at me blankly and said, "How could you get lightning to stay inside of a glass ball?" Actually, I don't know. I was hoping I could just go, "STAY IN THAT BALL, YOU WORTHLESS SPARK!" and it would.

Maybe I should dump this and work on my theory of evolution. You see, I think that we were all pecans at one point. Then the sky had a baby, and we crawled out of the Strawberry Pecan Salad that was the Gene Pool.

I'm so freaking smartical.

Love,

Arhat

0

Dear Diary,

I'm a pretty girl...

Love,

Lois

0

Dear Diary,

Maybe if I threw eggs at the Fan Mob they'll go away... I have to do something about them... They keep trying to take strands of my hair... I wonder if the Avatar has fangirls... Ha, that's a laugh. He's so old he can get Medicare and Social Security...

Damn, I need a kitty.

Love,

Zuko the Kitten-less

0

Dear Diary,

YAY! I gots me a KITTY CAT!

I named it Bobby Mofobby Fee Fi Noblobby Bobby. Bobby for short. But, I shall call him Bobby-chan, BECAUSE I'M AZN-4-LYFE YO! Word.

Uncle just LOVES Bobby-chan! He loves him so much, he gave him a big rock as a present! Then he threw him into a pond... It turns out that cats don't like water too much. Who knew?

Love,

Zuko-chan

0

Dear Diary,

Ha. Bet the stuuuupid Avatar doesn't have a kitty. Cuz he's stuuuupid.

Love,

Zuko the not stuuuupid

0

Dear Diary,

Something has to be done. These fangirls are going into a feeding frenzy! I'm not sure how long I (or my virginity) can last!

... What? I'M SAVING MYSELF FOR MARRIAGE, DAMMIT!

Love,

Zuko The NOT GAY!

0

Dear Diary,

Tai Li was right. That Water tribe peasant is kinda cute...

... I'll admit to being bisexual. Curious at the most, you bloodsucking slash harpies.

Damn, I'm glad nobody will ever see this. I can say whatever the hell I want!

... I did not like The Godfather.

Love,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

I'm really starting to wonder if Uncle means it in a good way when he calls Bobby-chan the "Spawn of Satan." So what if he's lazy eyed, has three legs, patches of fur missing, and yowls a pained yowl every night?

He's an outcast. Just like me...

PAPA, WHY DIDN'T YOU LOVE ME?

(Teardrop),

Zuzu-kun

0

Dear Diary,

My entries keep getting shorter and shorter... Maybe it's time to cry again...

WHY DID AZULA ALWAYS BURN MY DOLLIES? AND MY TOY SOLDIERS? WHY DO THE GOOD DIE YOUNG, BUT DISC JOCKEYS LIVE? HOW THE HELL DID CARROTTOP GET POPULAR? WHO THE HELL DOES PARIS HILTON THINK SHE IS? SHE CAN'T SING FOR HER LIFE!

... HOW DO I KNOW ALL THAT? IS IT THE SUE RADIATION? WHAT'S WITH THE CAPS LOCK?

DAMMIT IT ALL,

ZUKO

0

Dear Diary,

Today I drew a picture of the Water Tribe peasant. It was pretty. I think I have an eye for detail, and that I'm an art God. But when I tried to sell it to this guy, HE SPAT ON IT!

HE FREAKING SPAT ON IT!

SPAT ON IT!

... SPAT ON IT,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

Yeah, I totally killed that bitch from yesterday.

He so had it coming.

Bobby-chan ate his brain.

Yay,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

It turns out that bitch was Lee's brother.

Killed two birds with one stone.

I really hope Lee cries, that Radical Edward/Yahiko wannabe. Then I shall laugh. Laugh the laugh of HAPPINESS!

Dude,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

I met up with Song today. Actually, she had turned into a ninja and was after my head. She looked hot in her ninja getup. But, she was trying to get Bobina-dono, my birdie horse. So, I threw Bobby-chan at her.

Tee hee. Shuttlecock.

Tee hee,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair
In 77 and 69 revolution was in the air
I was born too late and to a world that doesn't POPTARTS!
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair

When the head of state didn't play guitar,
Not everybody drove a car,
When music really mattered and when radio was king,
When accountants didn't have POPTARTS!
And the media couldn't buy your POPTARTS!
And computers were still scary and we didn't know everything

Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with POPTARTS! in my hair
In 77 and 69 revolution was in the air
I was born too late and to a world that doesn't care
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair

When POPTARTS! still remained a myth
And ignorance could still be bliss
And when God Saved the Queen she turned a whiter shade of POPTARTS!
When my mom and dad were in their teens
and anarchy was still a dream
and the only way to stay in touch was a letter in the POPTARTS!

Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair
In 77 and 69 revolution was in the POPTARTS!
I was born too late and to a world that doesn't care
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair
When record shops were on top
and vinyl was all that they POPTARTS!
and the super info highway was still drifting out in space
kids were wearing hand me downs,
and playing games meant kick POPTARTS!
and footballers still had long hair and dirt across their face

Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with POPTARTS! in my hair
In 77 and 69 revolution was in the air
I was born too late and to a world that doesn't care
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair

I was born too late to a world that doesn't POPTARTS!
Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair

... Ok, I'm NEVER GOING TO DRINK TEA AGAIN! I keep singing things that don't exist...

Weeeeird,

Zuko

0

Dear Diary,

One of the fangirls tried to kiss me today.

Totally kicked her ass.

And who is this "Mary Sue" character? The one with the long pink hair and emerald eyes? Seriously, she won't leave me alone!

DAMMIT, SHE'S ON MY LEG! Sorry for the shortness, I have to go get my spray bottle...

BAD MARY SUE! BAD!

Love,

Zuko