The trouble with the stabiliser had been easy to fix once Wan figured out how. He'd appeared on the scene just as the rest of the engineers turned up, and gave a very thorough and detailed reason why the Shaft Room was shuddering its way out of the ship and why he hadn't told anyone until now. The engineers were trained to trust the chief, so the explanation was accepted with the fewest of grumbles. The solution involved a lot of splicing, some bolting, and one person having to go down every couple of hours to kick it for the rest of the trip. If anything it was easier than usual. One of Shui's first experiences on the ship was keeping a valve in a pipe over a massive drop for three hours with nothing except her teeth. Under no circumstances could they do anything so treasonous as stop for repairs.

The search party had been organised in good order, and in spite of her husband's protests that it would be better if she just stayed put and let the people do their job, Kyo lingered with Lieutenant Yin while he sent his men methodically through the rooms of the ship, asking people whether they'd seen a boy matching Nandi's description. Mostly they got blank stares and people mistaking him for someone else. After each round of questioning, Xuan was quick to mop up and provide discounts on hair salon treatment to ward off anything close to unease.

Throughout the ship, most were unaware of anything going wrong. Mostly they were either relaxing in the sun on the upper deck, throwing balls around, chatting the afternoon away, agonising about whether or not to use their rations on various luxury items the Hong Yu Guo Service was flogging with complements, or pouting in the shade and yelling at the young 'uns to keep their voices down. There were laughs and there were arguments, and even a couple of drunken challenges to an Agni Kai that both parties gracefully scarpered from. Life blossomed on board the Gang Shen.

Except there was one thing amiss aboard the ship that people did take notice of. Most of the children seemed very reluctant to come out and play. When they did play, they congregated indoors, complaining that the sun was too bright, or that the sea spray made their skin itch...any kind of excuse to keep away from the watery vastness they were immersed in. Many a parent tried to coax them out, but the sight of the water filled them with goosebumps. They couldn't explain it. They just didn't like it.

"But look," said one parent, pointing out at the deck to persuade the child to step forward, "they're having fun!"

Indeed, not every kid was spending their time indoors inside the Gang Shen's steel shell. A few seemed perfectly happy to run around outdoors, making fun of each other, picking and flicking boogers, and all the other wholesome activities children were supposed to do in the summer sun. They were but a few, though. Five, to be exact. Two boys and three girls. Normal as could be, the boy was enticed forward.

The children, spread out over the deck, stopped and turned as one. They smiled at the boy, and giggled.

The boy shrank back and declared that he'd much rather play marbles with the kids below deck. The children continued playing as if nothing happened.

As far as the eye could see, the Gang Shen was a sliver of silver floating atop the vast blue yonder. But it wasn't alone. Beneath the waves, something else huddled closely to the hull. They could feel the life aboard the ship, and envied.


The three disguised friends of the Avatar had their heads bowed at the floor between them. The tone had been set for the day and it wasn't budging no matter how bright it was outside. Momo was using the opportunity to help himself to the group's supply of lychii nuts, and everyone else felt too dour to really take offence. A small lump groaned from the bed at the other end of the room, charged with fever but reassuring everyone that he was just taking some rest. Other than the churn of the engine and the call of the crow-gulls, the silence was so prevalent it was starting to burrow into their ears.

Sokka sighed heavily for the seventh time since they came back, "we're supposed to be talking strategy but all I got is how many screws there are between me and the wall."

"Can't talk. Moping." Toph answered succinctly.

The silence enclosed again, but Katara felt obliged to shove it outwards again. "Can we please have an adventure where someone doesn't die?" she hugged her knees and looked up lazily, drawling, "I kinda miss those..."

"It's just such a waste," Toph waxed lyrical, "we'd barely met, and there were so many horrible, cruel, sadistic things I was gonna do to him and now I can't because someone else got to him first..."

"Moving, Toph. Moving," Sokka was getting agitated from lack of activity, "but we're not gonna figure things out just by maximising our glumness. First things first. What the heck happened back there?"

"A dead kid nearly beat the living snot out of us," Toph commented.

"Yeah...I noticed...but how!?" Sokka asked urgently, "Katara, you stopped him just by moving your hands around. What did you do?"

"I'm not sure...I...I just wanted him to stop," Katara drew her legs closer, "it was weird...like he was being dragged or something...and I...it felt like I was pushing something away...it's hard to explain..."

"It's...like he was a puppet...and Katara cut the strings..." Toph's eyes widened when she realised what that meant. Sokka realised too, and nearly jettisoned the whole idea out of his head. It was bizarre even by spooky bending standards.

"You're kidding!" Sokka was excited with anger, "you gotta be kidding! No way! No frikkin' way! You're telling me that kid was being waterbended!?"

"He can't have been!" Katara defended herself, "all the scrolls I read, all the time I was being taught by Pakku, all the tales, all the legends, I never heard anything about a single Waterbender who could bend the human body! It's impossible!"

"Well I'll be glad to know what the heck else it coulda been, 'cuz I don't care what weirdness this world throws at me, I am drawing the line at zombies!" Sokka stabbed the ground with his finger, "last I checked, dead people don't get up and walk around!"

"What about Aang?" Toph suggested flippantly.

"That just proves my point! You don't see Aang getting up and walking around, do you!?" Sokka threw his arms towards the bed, highly animated in the terse room. The dead boy in question groaned loudly and buried his head under his pillow.

"...your voices are hurting my head..." Aang croaked. The sudden appearance of this voice jolted the others into remembering what it was they were heading to the Fire Nation for in the first place.

"Hey! Dead-Weight feels the land of the living to be worthy of his presence!" Toph smirked.

"Where did you get 'Dead-Weight' from, anyway?" Sokka fielded the question, since Katara was too busy rushing to Aang's bed-side for it to enter her mind.

"His toes couldn't twinkle if you poured icing over 'em," Toph shrugged, "good excuse for a new name as any."

"Aang...you were sleeping when we came in, I didn't want to disturb you..." Katara placed a hand on Aang's clammy arm, "and...I'm sorry. This stuff really is going to disturb you."

"...that's okay...I heard..." Aang struggled to turn himself over, gulping down breaths between sentences, "...I've...been awake all this...time..."

"You have to relax!" Katara slid her arms around herself to stream the water out of her pouch, flowing her hands over Aang's body to find the points of resistance inside his body. The water glowed, and once she started to think about the energy coursing through Aang's veins, the flow of chi that allowed her healing to work, the thought of not just easing flows but asserting herself over them came to mind. She pushed the possibility out completely. It was impossible. She didn't control the water, and if she thought she did she'd be a terrible Waterbender. She persuaded the water, coaxed it, allowed it to flow where she wanted it to flow, used its power and its force on its own, without claiming dominion over it. You could persuade water from a pond to leap up and string around, to adapt the way you wish, since water by itself is usually content to flow free and is under no other influence.

Blood is different. Blood has an influence already. It's owned. It's someone's personal property. You couldn't persuade water that was already committed to the greatest task of all...sustaining life. No Waterbender could do it even if they wanted to. Healing was a matter of coaxing water to go where it already wanted to go in the first place, easing pressures. To do otherwise would go against someone else's will. She looked down and realised that she was starting to soak Aang's shirt in distraction. She quickly swelled her hands upwards to persuade the healing water to do the same. Aang looked up and blinked blearingly, "...I'm fine...really...I'm just glad you got to them in time, Katara..."

"So, wait, Katara said you warned her that something bad was going to happen. You knew that something bad was going to happen," Sokka interrogated, "you're the only one with any idea what it is, you've been awake and listening all this time...and you haven't said a thing."

"...I would've...it's just..." Aang took a deep breath before launching into the next exertion, "...I've been kinda paralysed in agony until now. Okay...okay that's better...that's better..."

Katara swung her arms back to send the healing water back into the pouch. Aang pushed up on his arms but found leaning up harder going than he thought. His muscles had wasted into noodly appendages so he needed help from Katara and Sokka to drag his upper torso upright and his back to the wall. Once up, he took a series of deep, soothing breaths that seemed to make his intense dizziness easier to cope with. Katara asked, "so...what is it we're up against?"

Aang, who was previously fairly chipper about being awake and pampered by the girl of his dreams, became serious as he prepared himself for confrontation with something he alone was responsible for. The light outside the porthole was dazzling next to the room's indoor gloom, and all three of them sans a stuffed Momo were gathered around the bed. The Avatar began, "...do you remember, when we were passing over the Yalujiang, I talked about the Yalu Pillars at the mouth of the river?"

"Oh yeah..." Sokka recalled the silhouette from last night, "the ones the Fire Nation are using as bridge foundations. The jerks."

"Yeah, those..." Aang confirmed, taking a deep breath for the next bout, "...I said something about water creatures too. They used the pillars as nests. They were like giant honeycombs inside, where their young swam in pools. They're almost mythic with the stories surrounding them. Tales of white mask faces, voices without sound, taking over the living, and were either good spirits or vengeful demons depending on who was writing the story. I couldn't remember what they were called, but I remember 'em now. They're call...hrk!" Aang broke out in a fit of coughs, smacking his hand onto his mouth to contain them.

"Hey! Don't leave us in suspense!" Toph complained. Katara leaned in to support Aang as he coughed violently. After a while he calmed down, but he felt like his throat had been shredded, and Sokka was quick to pour out a cup of water while the Air Nomad was coughing and handed it to him as soon as he stopped. Aang gulped the water greedily and breathed deeply.

"...they're called...Shachihoko..." Aang croaked out, deciding to let himself recover. Even the name haunted the room, as Sokka and Katara looked at each other.

"So...these creatures lived in the Yalu Pillars...and the Fire Nation destroyed their home..." Katara figured out the gaps.

"And their kids..." Toph suggested.

"Annnd...they decided to gang up and attack Fire Nation ships with their creepy mythic fairy-tale powers?" Sokka winced, "c'mon, you can't be serious. These are creatures! Animals! They wouldn't know what vengeance meant!"

"Shachihoko are more than just animals," Aang interrupted, having recovered from his coughing fit, "their bodies are nothing more than water, and they're the spirits and guardians of rivers and streams. Many villages give tributes and blessings to them. With everything that's happened, I think we need to take those tales seriously. And that means we're being haunted by powerful and deadly Waterbending spirits who want vengeance against all of humanity for the annihilation of their entire race."

Aang's words put things into clear, awful perspective. The pregnant pause was unsatisfactorily filled with Sokka crossing his arms and claiming "I'll believe it when I see it."

"You just did," reminded Katara, seething in irritation. Sokka peered at his sister inquisitively. Eventually he threw his arms up in a shrug.

"Okay! I've been wrong before!" Sokka exclaimed.

"Wait a minute..." Toph realised, "how come you know all this?"

"Uhhh..." Aang concentrated for a second, trying to recall something that was several lifetimes ago, "I'm...not sure. I heard about the Pillars and how beautiful they...were a hundred years ago when I was in the area. I heard about the creatures for the first time then, but I'd just planned to leave it for another trip. ...actually...you know what, Toph? I've no idea how I learnt this stuff about the Shachihoko."

"Avatar junk?" Toph guessed.

"Avatar junk," the Air Nomad concurred, "but I know what I saw when I was out cold. I saw you all sinking in the sea, with the rest of the Gang Shen. That'll be our future if we fail."

"So what can we do?" Katara asked, "Aang...you're the bridge between the worlds. Between Mortals and Spirits. You're the one who's supposed to protect the balance and everything. Couldn't you do what you did with Hei Bai? Talk to them and calm them down? Make them see reason and stop attacking?"

"I could...except for one thing," Aang admitted with his eyes turned downward.

"What?" Sokka interjected.

"They've gone insane."

The words were close to an admission of failure for Aang. The balance was so far out of place that even the spirits were going mad. An insane Firebender they could manage. But an insane force of nature? How could anyone deal with that? If the Avatar himself couldn't put things right...they were horribly, tragically stuck.

"Oh..." Sokka reacted to the news, "rules that out, then."

"I don't know what to do..." Aang declared, breathing through a sudden bout of tiredness, "...but if we don't do something, we don't stand a chance."

"We could just grab a boat and get out of here," Toph suggested, "it's not like it's our problem."

"Yes it is our problem!" Sokka explained, "as much of a jerk Wan is, he's right. If his big 'n holy 'God of Steel' ain't good enough to protect us, there's no way we're lasting an hour in an ironclad canoe."

"But what about Wan?" Katara wondered, "he knows who we are, now! What do we do when he tells the Fire Nation about us as soon as we step on shore?"

"I got no idea...run real fast?" Sokka held his hands apart, trying to keep several strands of thought together, "we'll cross that river when we come to it. For now, we have to concentrate on these Sachichochichaka...things. We need to know what they're doing, what they want to do, and how we can stop them doing it. They worked through Nandi, but they couldn't've stopped there. They might try again with some other kid."

"We have a responsibility to put things right," Aang mumbled from under his blankets, "things just shouldn't be this way. These people are Fire Nation, but they need our help all the same. They're still people. We can't leave things like this."

"And on that cheerful note, let's get moving!" Sokka began striding towards the door, filled with a mission to uncover just what the heck was going on, "we should go out and ask around. Being cooped up in here all day won't help things."

"Wait! Sokka!" Katara left Aang's bedside to halt Sokka's march, "we can't leave Aang on his own. Someone needs to stay behind and make sure he's okay."

"Sure, while you're here stroking and petting your boyfriend, I can go get my insides hollowed out and turned into the Shachi-'n-Shachi road-show's star marionette!" Sokka turned and leaned into Katara's face, clearly needing a day off, "I need you...with me...chasing off the children of the damned...and...well...you're better at talking to people than me!"

Katara giggled at the sudden complement emerging out of the stream of abuse, calming herself to try to look confrontational, "if Aang gets worse while we're gone, this whole trip would be for nothing. We can't take him with us, so one of us has to stay with him."

"I'll stay..." Toph waved a hand side-to-side in what she guessed was the direction Katara and Sokka were in. The Water Tribe siblings had to both pause a while as the bizarreness of what Toph was implying impinged on their thought processes. They both slowly turned to face the blind girl, who was busy waving her hand with a curious look on her face.

"Sorry...uh..." Katara held her arms out to steady her thinking, "...what did you just say?"

"I said I'll stay..." Toph made it sound as natural as possible, "I'll look after Aang while you two go off and check the ship for creepy kids and strange happenings."

"...Toph?" Sokka queried, before breaking out into a smirk, "are my ears playing tricks on me, or did you just volunteer for a selfless, responsible task with much drudgery and little reward?"

"Got nothing better to do," Toph shrugged, hammering a foot on the steel plate she'd been dragging around to shunt it into the air and catch it in one hand, "anyways, I gotta practice with this thing. Might as well do that and babysit for a while."

"That's a really good idea!" Katara smiled, eager to encourage the merest smidgen of co-operation from the Earthbending runaway, "just make sure he's okay, will you? You know...keep talking to him...take his temperature...give him plenty of water...uhh...hope he doesn't need to go to the bathroom..."

"I'll be fine!" Aang giggled, slightly embarrassed, "I can do those things by myself! Just...worry about what's important, 'kay?"

Katara looked and eventually nodded, understanding what she had to do. Sokka opened the door to let Katara out, smiling back at Toph and saying, "I gotta say, Toph, I'm impressed! You really do have a sweet, nurturing, kittenish side in that smarmy, jerky shell of yours!"

Sokka barely flinched when a metal cup rebounded sharply from the edge of the door frame. Toph evidently saw that as an insult, but if anything Sokka's grin only widened, "hahah! Can't do anything now, can'tcha!? I can stand here all day and call you whatever I feel like and there ain't nothing you can do about it! Hahahah! Hahahaha-ack!"

The metal jug stuck to his face from the force of the impact, peeling off and spilling across the floor a second later. Toph held her throwing arm out, scorning, "I can hear you from the other side of the ship, you dweeb."

Sokka was not terribly amused, and shut the door after himself without another word. Toph relaxed her arm and leaned on the bed post. In his half-vegetative state, Aang wasn't too sure, but he could swear Toph was blushing. Thinking about the whole scene from afar, and the people in it, he couldn't stop himself from bursting out laughing. Toph's brow screwed tightly as the laughter mixed in with a fresh bout of coughing. Aang had to stop to get his breath back, but fresh laughing wasn't too far from the surface. He beat his chest to get everything out, "okay...heheh...it's okay...I'm okay...heheheheh.."

"What's so funny?" Toph wondered, utterly confused.

"Nothing, nothing...it's..." Aang chuckled slightly and wiped a tear from his eye, "...I think you got a crush."

"What!?" Toph leaned over the bedpost, turning her head this way and that as tried to get her head around what Aang just said, "...whuh...uh...uhmwuh...what!?"

"There, just proved it!" Aang smiled triumphantly, "you got a crush on Sokka."

Toph gawped at Aang, "that's...that's the dumbest...stupidest...most disgusting thing I ever heard. Ever! I mean...where did this come from!? I don't have a crush on Sokka! That's retarded!"

"Your face looks redder than the nose of a spiral monkey," Aang stated smugly.

"Gee, I don't know what your face looks like, but if you don't shut up I'm gonna make sure nobody knows!" Toph threatened, "I don't have a crush on Sokka! He's the most stuck-up, nosy, pompous, arrogant jerk I ever met! I hate him! I mean...didn't you see me throw that jug in his face!? Isn't it obvious!?"

"Oh yeah, it's obvious," Aang felt a need to stroke his chin, "you can call it too obvious."

"I don't...get...the logic!" Toph clutched her head, "Aang, you're a monk! A naïve, simple-minded, carefree...kinda whiny lately...monk! You got no idea how this stuff works!"

"Actually, it's been something I've noticed for a while," Aang said half-seriously, "when I was trying to master the Avatar State the Guru told me that I should let go of my attachments, get away from what connects me to the world...stuff like that. I used to find it hard, but now it's become kinda easy, since...y'know...dying kinda makes you step back a bit and look at things a different way. You know what I mean?"

"I don't know, I haven't died yet," Toph shrugged.

"Eheh...good point," Aang smiled, "well...it's kinda like...I see things from a distance, you know? See how things join together, people, friendships, love, all that stuff. How we act around each other and what we say and do and what it really means."

Toph walked around the bed-post and jumped up to plant herself on the side of of the bed, arms stretched behind her, "and...what's that got to do with crushes?"

"Just something I noticed," Aang shrugged, "when you feel for someone...I mean really feel for someone...you just can't act normal around them. You either act like you love them, if you're honest with yourself, or you act like you hate them, if you're embarrassed or don't want to admit it or try to hide it or...whatever. You can't act like you're just ambivalent or disinterested, the emotions are too high. If they're sweet and charming, you act like you hate them because you don't want to admit it. If they do the smallest thing wrong, you really do hate them, blindly, without remorse, because it feels like such a betrayal."

"So the right answer is that I don't think anything of Sokka whatsoever?" Toph asked, "what if he is being a jerk? Can I call him a jerk then?"

"Call him whatever you want. It's your life! But the emotions never lie!" Aang shifted over to his side to rest better. He'd been holding on to a smile for much of the conversation, but as his eyes rested on the far wall it gradually left his face, as he contemplated why he had paid attention to these things in the first place, "that's why Katara doesn't love me."

Toph's head jerked slightly backwards at the sudden 180 in the discussion, "woah! Leaping much!? What gave you that idea?"

"Think about it..." Aang leant up again, "in all the time you've known, have you ever seen her yell at me? At all? Get flustered with something I've done? Anything like that?"

"Uh...not really..." Toph considered, "but she really cares about you. Almost in a creepy way. She goes wayyyy overboard trying to deal with your whiny self."

"I'm not whiny..." Aang complained.

"Then what's with the self-pity?" Toph pointed out, "C'mon, Dead-Weight! She obsesses about you! She spends her every waking moment caring for you."

"Sure, when there's something wrong with me," Aang continued, "when I'm okay, it's like I'm not important anymore. She loves me as a son, a geeky little brother, as the great hope for the world and all that stuff. She loves me as family. But she doesn't love me. I'd had such a huge crush on her ever since I woke in her arms in the South Pole that I never noticed that crush wasn't coming back."

"Big deal!" Toph thrust her arms apart, "love ain't this twinkly thing that comes from the sky y'know! You have a crush on Sugar Queen...I know that much, your heart starts playing the banjo every time you look at her...so now you're down because you've figured out she's not getting handed to you on a plate. Does she even know you have a crush on her?"

"...I...I think so..." Aang wondered, "I think we kissed once..."

"You think?" Toph mocked, "what? You're not sure? You have this great and wise insight into the ways of lurrrve and you don't even know if you kissed a girl or not?"

"It...it was dark!" Aang countered, "I don't know what I felt...uh...I mean...wait a minute...what is it with you anyway!? I didn't ask you for advice!"

"No, you kindly volunteered your own stupid advice, so I thought I'd advise you to stop being pathetic and stand up for yourself!" Toph shouted.

"You don't know any more than I d- hurk!" Aang shouted animatedly, bringing himself out into a series of debilitating coughs. Toph just sat there, too angry to help.

"Yeah...that's right...kill your lungs from talking crud," Toph nodded sagely, "see how much I'm not leaping over and coddling you like a big baby."

Aang looked up from his coughing position evilly, "you...I...you little...guh...egh...shut up!"

"Advantage: mine," Toph remarked smarmily. Reflecting on what Aang had said before, her cheeky smile faded as she voiced her thoughts out loud, "wait...if acting like you hate someone means that you love them...doesn't that mean we have a crush on each other?"

Aang and Toph considered the proposition together, and after due thought began to panic like they'd never panicked before. Aang flailed, "ah! Ah! Ah! Uhhh...I consider you a good friend and a valuable asset! You've been very helpful, a good...uhhhh...colleague! Yeah! Good, friendly colleague Toph!"

"Yeah!" Toph gripped the bed fiercely as her head buzzed through several possibilities at once, "annnd...you're also a valuable colleague and a very dear..."

"'Dear's' too cozy! 'Dear's' too cozy!" Aang warned loudly.

"Not dear! Not dear!" Toph thought hard, "uhhhmmm...a veryyyy nice uhh...associate! Yes! A very important person for world-saving things for which I am glad to volunteer some effort until other commitments come along!"

"Of course!" Aang's eyes swiveled wildly, "and I'm happy you are one of a number of volunteers who want to help save the world! We're a nice group of friends who do friend-type things...as a group! So we can do what we like because we appreciate each other as free, single, single, individuals!"

"Absolutely!" Toph's breath was getting away from her, "after all, just being friends and everything! We can argue sometimes, but all in good fun! Because we have no strong feelings about each other whatsoever!"

Feeling they'd done enough, Aang and Toph sank down in a huge sigh of relief, having avoided something that could have been horribly embarrassing. Chipperly, Toph jumped off the bed and gathered up the metal plate at the foot of the bedpost.

"Well, time for me to try this thing out!" Toph decided, kneeling crossed-legged on the floor in front of the plate, "now don't bother me, Dead-Weight, I need to concentrate."

"...that's okay..." Aang mewed. The effort of avoiding a crush on Toph had been rather exhausting, and he turned himself back to one side the drag the blanket up, "...I won't be any trouble...you can concentrate on your metal..."

"Thanks for your permission," Toph would've rolled her eyes if it meant anything to her, "just to warn you, if you do need the bathroom, I ain't moving a muscle."

"...alright...don't need...bathroom..." Aang's eyes drooped shut, "...just...need...sleep..."

The conspicuous silence in the room alerted Toph, and she turned her head to hear better. The blind girl briefly worried about whether he had 'phased out' again. She couldn't tell without sensing his heartbeat, which was impossible in this room. "Hey, Dead-Weight," Toph called, "Dead-Weight! Aang! You okay!?"

A few terrifying seconds passed, and Toph was almost certain he was drifting off again, until a monstrous sound ripped through the air. Aang's eyes were closed, but his mouth was wide open, complete with tongue flopping out. Feeling put upon, Toph turned back from the bed and placed a hand on the plate before her, muttering, "since when did he snore?"


Colonel Mongke had been wondering whether he'd need to ask for directions, since Nagaoka was a sprawling mess of a city while The Digie Den didn't sound like an establishment that readily advertised itself, and on top of that his method for asking people things didn't involve so much asking as holding flickering flames underneath people's nostrils and daring them to sneeze. But he needn't have worried. The large parade of faceless, red-helmeted Royal Guard was something of a giveaway as to where he was supposed to go.

The parade ended at a set of steps that led down to the basement of a large, multi-storey building, along a side-street that was infrequently travelled. Down the stairs was a dinky little metal door with a slider at eye-level, and on the wall next to it was the calligraphy 'The Dijie Den' with a handy little arrow pointing inside, just to make it all the clearer. Mongke hesitated to walk down, but he wasn't afraid in the least. Just irritated that he had to take valuable time out of the day to do this. So long as he got a good drink, he'd be happy. And if this was a trap and dozens of armed soldiers poured out of the woodwork to capture him, quite frankly he was looking forward to it...anything to break the monotony of working with Zuko.

Mongke huffed once he made his decision, ruffling his nose ring, and stepped down to knock on the rusty door. The slider flew open, and a pair of bloodshot, paranoid eyes stared back at him. The man at the door spoke deeply, but fretfully, like an ox-hippo on amphetamines, "we're closed! You can't come in! We're fumigating! Go away! Get lost!"

"Hey, I got a note telling me to come to this dump," Mongke held the origami-message up to the hole in the door, and the man's eyes widened in fright.

"Ack! Ehh...come right in! Come right in! We're open for business for you and your guest!" the slider flew shut, and a vast number of bolts and locks began springing from the other side.

"Guest?" Mongke asked to the closed door, shortly before the metal thing creaked open. Beyond it was a dingy little place which seemed to have been rapidly cleaned up in the last few minutes. It was small and cozy, dark except for a small filter of red light, and Mongke could smell from the air that around this time it'd usually be musty and smoky as well, and of course full of men having a good time away from the missus (or full of women having a good time away from the factory boss...there were a suprising number of those places, and even more surprisingly they tended to be just as rowdy. How the soldier came to know of this was a secret he would take to his dying day). But now it was deserted save for six utterly silent Royal Guards standing to attention in front of the pews that clung the walls of the Den.

Everything was sending him towards the bar at the far end of the Den, with several free stools to sit on and a bartender that had just ran to a complete stop, picked up a glass and started cleaning as if nothing had happened. With nothing better to do, the Colonel stepped forward and seated himself on one of the stools, resting his arms on the bar. The bartender was a man slightly older than him, bald-headed except for a long pony-tail and pudgy-faced besides, sweating bucketloads even as he kept up an incredibly artificial smile. He blurted out the question, "what'll it be!?"

Mongke looked up and blinked wearily, "since ye're serving, I guess I'll have a glass of seishu."

"Will that be 'Spirit of the Fire Lord' Seishu or 'Nectar of the One True Element' Seishu!?" the bartender asked a little too eagerly, clearly uncomfortable with asking it but just as clearly scared out of his wits that something bad would happen to him if he didn't ask it.

The Colonel was tired of these games, "just...give me a seishu..."

"I'll have a glass of Lychii & Bin Jun Juice," a young confident female voice ordered from behind Mongke, as the woman who ordered the drink sat down on the stool nearest the Colonel. The bartender let out a gurgled squeal and set to work making drinks as fast as humanly possible. Mongke looked aside and saw Azula leaning over without facing him, looking comfortable and speaking conversationally, "you shouldn't drink alcohol, it isn't good for your constitution at all."

The bartender had almost instantly poured the drinks, which was something of an achievement since he needed to mix the Lychii Juice and Bin Jun Juice on the spot, and slammed them onto the bar. He smiled, held his hands together and prayed quietly to the god who watched over his bar that she hadn't forsaken him and gone off with some other bar. Both Mongke and Azula pulled their drinks towards themselves, and Azula took a decent swig of her juice. Mongke didn't drink, but just held his glass by the rim and watched the Fire Princess with an etched frown. Azula put her drink down and mimicked Mongke's way of holding it, smiling at the career soldier. Their gazes were locked in a battle of wills for quite some time. The Dijie Den was deathly quiet, except for the nervous glass-cleaning the bartender was engaged in. The Colonel was finding the silence suffocating.

"Okay, Your Highness, I'll bite," Mongke began, "what do you want?"

"To have a bar chat," Azula spoke as cheerfully as she seemed capable of, which still had an icy gloss to it. Mongke glanced around.

"Yes, I can see that," the Colonel fixed his stare, "but...why?"

"I didn't realise I needed an excuse," Azula sipped her drink flippantly, "I was under the impression that having bar chats was a soldier's favourite part of the day. I don't believe I'm mistaken?"

"No, not at all, Your Highness," Mongke corrected the Fire Princess, "'cept last time I been to a bar chat, there were more than just two soldiers and we didn't have a whole parade standing to attention while we drank."

"Hmm...you have a point," Azula considered, glancing behind herself, "Guards? Stand watch outside until I say otherwise." The six Royal Guards bowed in reverence and quickly exited the Den. Azula faced the bartender and spoke without a single change in tone, "and that goes for you too."

"Yes, Your Highness!" the bartender bowed gratefully, walking tensely and slowly behind the bar until the Fire Princess was out of sight before launching into as fast a run as his legs could manage away from her. Azula took another sip. Now the deathly quiet really was deathly quiet.

"I want us to have a little chat. A calm, casual chat about your priorities," Azula's tone never changed, but the menace behind it was crushing, "when talking about something as crucial as your choices in life, it's always best to be comfortable, isn't it?"

"You mean I have a choice?" Mongke felt the need for his first sip of seishu.

"No one ever has a choice, Colonel," Azula revealed her point of view, "they might pretend that they do, but really they don't. Their very biological make-up forces them into decisions. Their minds and bodies the product of an endless chain of cause and effect. Choice is an illusion, a simple matter of feeling yourself to be dominant. It's a product of a time when everything was uncertain, when the world was kept in a miserable, tepid, degenerate equilibrium, when the weak were allowed to multiply and the strong were allowed to whither on the vine. Now the Avatar is dead, we can finally begin the long overdue process of whittling down humanity to those who are superior, and discarding those who are redundant. Which would you rather be?"

"No marks for guessing which one you think you are, then," Mongke took another sip of his drink. As he studied the glass he hoped the seishu was on the house, "sucks for me if I'm one of those getting extinct, ain't it?"

"You know and I know that you're worth more than the worms who make up most of mankind," the Princess announced, "or would you prefer being in the company of that bartender over there?"

"Where are you going with this?" Mongke asked, setting aside his drink for a moment.

"I'm simply asking, as a favour, that when the time comes for you to show your loyalty, your choice reflects your privileged place in the greater scheme of humanity," Azula coolly sipped her juice, "and until that time, while serving under someone who's less than you, you just keep that scheme in mind."

The soldier twisted the words around in his head in an effort to get them to make sense. But he realised that all he needed to do was consider the conniving little sneak who was saying them, and it all slid beautifully into place. He nodded sagely, "aaaah...I see. You want me to spy on your brother for you."

"I admire your bluntness. It's very refreshing," Azula smirked, "and I can admire your perception of things. You know who your superiors really are, and you know Zuko isn't one of them."

"Ech, I'm not that smart. And ye're forgetting one thing, Your Highness," Mongke swivelled his glass around in thought, "I'm a soldier. When I said I don't do political hijinks, I meant it. I don't fight people's petty squabbles. I fight wars. It's the one thing I do best. Nothing else."

"I'm not so sure about that," Azula observed, "I've heard some impressive accounts of your solo performance in 'Story of the Red Snake'."

What irritated Mongke the most was that he couldn't bite back at the Fire Lord's only daughter, so he just took the half-complement as it came, "very well, Your Highness, I can fight wars and play the lead in operas, but that don't change anything. It's not my place to get involved in matters of the Royal Family. Whatever 'greater scheme of humanity' you've found, that just goes 'swoosh' over me."

Mongke flew a hand over his head to emphasise the point, settling down to take another drink. He continued, "if you want me to spy on Zuko, you gotta give me a better incentive than 'because you're better than him'. Sure, I don't like Zuko that much. He's arrogant, short-tempered, rude, inconsiderate, he's terrible, terrible conversation, as lively as a snail-sloth and has about as much personality, but...how can I put this diplomatically?" Mongke looked up in consideration, pausing, then he slammed his drink down and turned to face Azula, "I don't think you're much of an improvement."

Azula wasn't amused in the least, and said simply, "I did warn you against drinking alcohol. A loosened tongue could be fatal."

"Hasn't killed me yet," Mongke held his glass aloft, grinning deviously, "and something tells me I've still got long years ahead of me. You want to know why, Your Highness? Because I'm not just following Zuko. I'm following the orders of an authority even higher than you. The decree of the great and mighty descendent of Agni, the bearer of the Sun Spirit, the light of our Nation etc. etc. The Lord of you and I has proclaimed that Iroh must be found, that Zuko be the one who finds him, and that he either does or faces the ultimate punishment. And that means anyone who gets in his way faces the ultimate punishment too. No exceptions. Not even for a Princess."

"How does his fate matter to you?" Azula implored, "the leader of the Rough Rhinos couldn't possibly feel himself beholden to the whims of a pathetic, rudderless inferior."

"I don't, but I remember Your Highness saying something about choices?" the Colonel looked down into the smooth liquid swishing about in his glass, "this isn't the Earth Kingdom, where we can get away with stuff that'd make anyone 'cept you shake in horror. This is the Fire Nation. The centre of the world. I get killed here, those Guards will know, that bartender will know, my friends will know, everyone in the city would know, and soon the Fire Lord would know, and he'd be looking for a damned good excuse why one of his most trusted commanders was lured to a basement and burnt to a crisp while looking for his treacherous older brother."

"I remember you saying something about not getting involved in political hijinks," Azula toyed with the rim of her glass, "reconsidering your opinion?"

"Nope," Mongke brought the seishu to his lips and flung his head back, swigging the rest of the alcohol in one gulp. The Colonel slammed the glass back on the table and stood up off of the stool, marching away from Azula without a second glance, "which is why I'm getting out right now, and you're not gonna do a thing to stop me."

Mongke continued to march away, expecting to receive some sharp and brutal put-down from the Princess behind him. But it never came. Immensely puzzled, the soldier's march ground to a halt, and he felt compelled to turn around to see what Azula was doing. She hadn't budged from her stool, and just seemed to nurse her drink as if nothing had happened. He could see a smile in the corner of her mouth. This wasn't what he was expecting at all.

"You're...really not gonna do a thing to stop me?" the soldier asked in all honesty. His abrasiveness against the daughter of the Fire Lord was well over the line as it was, and that she wasn't doing a thing about it was troubling. She took another sip of juice and looked aside at Mongke.

"What's the need? All we're having is a friendly little bar chat," Azula stated. Mongke, deciding to leave the matter unresolved, nodded politely and turned to leave. It was then that Azula finally piped up, "just...one question, Colonel." Mongke paused. The Fire Princess asked, "you seem so contemptuous towards the Fire Nation. Its leadership, its principles, its citizenry and its way of life. And yet you soldier on. Why do you keep fighting when you don't believe in what you're fighting for?"

Mongke considered his answer carefully, turning his eyes away in thought, "I could have stopped fighting, once. I could have put up my uniform, returned to my mining village in the north, lived a normal life just staying with my folks and doing normal, everyday things." Mongke's decisive eyes met Azula's, "but when you're looking in the face of an eight-year-old child after you've killed everyone he's ever held dear...you realise you can't ever go back. Normality is for other people. I've left it far behind."

Azula's smile widened, and she turned fully towards Mongke. "I wasn't being flippant when I said I admire your honesty," Azula revealed, "good luck in your future endeavours, Colonel Mongke."

"Your Highness," the Colonel nodded slightly more reverentially, and turned again to march out the door into the bright daylight outside. In the dark, dreary silence of The Dijie Den, Azula didn't budge from her position or her wide smile, looking immensely pleased that the conversation went the way it did. The door slammed shut, and she leaned her head back to take the last sip of the juice.

While she was drinking, out of nowhere emerged the long-faced assassin from the darkness of the Den, standing to Azula's left. From above, the wide-faced acrobat dropped from the ceiling with a twirl, steadying herself to Azula's right. They both looked ahead at the closed door, and Azula resumed her cold smile as soon as the last of the juice was drunk, placing the empty glass on the bar behind her with a small tap, purring "you know what to do."


Katara's hand sprung up to shade her eyes from the brilliant sun. It was the first time in nearly twenty-four hours that she had seen daylight. It seemed so bizarre. How can something so terrible happen on a beautiful day like this?

The siblings had travelled onto the Upper Deck of the Gang Shen. It had two layers to it, consisting of the wide deck itself that held the sun beds and ball gaming sections, and an upper observation deck shaped like an oval that raised off of the deck itself and was accessible via several stairways. Inside the oval was a range of various facilities and shops, including a small sparring gym with several scorch marks around the door. It had everything a tourist needed to have a comfortable, relaxing trip, and the watermark of the Hong Yu Guo Service was plastered next to every sign.

Katara looked around at the sun-drenched deck, the adults getting their fill of the early afternoon sunlight, the 5 children having the square between the oval and the con tower all to themselves and making the most of it, hearing the roar of the prow slicing through the waves, and feeling the still, blue ocean that surrounded them. The Waterbender leaned back against the side of the hull and closed her eyes, feeling the breeze cool her skin. In all this time she hadn't had the chance to relax.

"Kat...ugh...Ursa!" Sokka called back to her, having realised he'd been walking on his own for some time. Katara snapped out of her exhaustion and looked at the Water Warrior, while he remarked sternly, "what are you doing? We need to concentrate!"

"Oh...sorry..." Katara wiped her brow, "I'm just tired, that's all. You're right, we do need to concentrate."

"You got that right," Sokka marched forward, and Katara dutifully followed alongside, "if we want to get to the bottom of all this, we need to keep our mind on nothing except weird, out-of-the-ordinary things. We can't afford to be distracted by..." Sokka's head spun aside and dragged the rest of his body back with it as he read the sign next to a wide-open door inside the oval, "ooooh! Professional masseurs...relaxing and recharging massages for arms, legs, hands, feet and back, only 10 Shu and 1 Luxury Item ration a pop..."

"Sure. Can't afford to be distracted by that, can we?" Katara crossed her arms moodily at Sokka's hungry clamouring for special treats.

"But...but..." Sokka whined, "with a nice, refreshing massage, we can concentrate better! You said you were tired..."

"Yes, I am, and the idea of being groped by a complete stranger while lives are at stake is just making me more tired," Katara pointed out, "maybe we can talk to the people up here? Except...what are we supposed to ask, anyway? 'Have you noticed any white-masked spirits stealing your soul lately'? I don't think we're going to get very far, somehow."

"If we go in there we can ask while they're too relaxed from easing their muscles," Sokka pointed hopefully towards the massage parlour, "catch 'em at their most vulnerable 'n all."

"Will you stop being so hung up on that stupid massage parlour!?" Katara boiled over, "why do you want one so bad, anyway!?"

"A healthy body means a healthy mind," Sokka spurned, feeling no need to explain himself, "as the brains of the outfit I want my head to be alert and at peak efficiency!"

"Look out!" yelled a titchy voice from down the deck. Sokka had enough time to turn and mutter a 'mwuh?' before a leather ball hit him square in the face. The robust and experienced warrior yelled loudly and clamped his hands to his nose, sprawling out over the deck in pain. The rotund child who threw it waddled forward to reclaim the thrown object, and shrank before Sokka's evil stare, "uh...sorry mister..."

"It had to be you, didn't it?" Sokka lay prone on the deck and stared down the child. He was soon joined by another child, a round-faced girl with her hair rolled up into pig-tails. She looked at the boy and nudged the scared boy.

"Hey, Tai...that the one you told us about?" she whispered loudly, "the one talkin' to the moon?"

"Uh...yeah, Niu, I think he was..." Tai stepped back to look Sokka over more clearly. Sokka leapt up to his feet in embarrassment. Katara was raising an eyebrow, and he wanted to defend himself.

"What!? What are you talking about? Don't make stuff up you know nothing 'bout, kid!" Sokka held his arm forward to point, but in bringing his hands away from his face he inadvertently allowed a dribble of blood to escape his nose. His hands slapped back onto his face in fright, but the damage was done as Niu immediately burst out laughing.

"Suuure, whatever ye say, moooon-lover!" Niu teased. Tai was sniggering along as well, and Sokka was getting into a panic. His reputation was at stake! Thinking quickly, he snatched the ball out of Tai's surprised hands and chucked it as far as he could towards the con tower.

"Go long!" he shouted.

"Hey!" Niu complained, as she and Tai ran after the ball. Beside him, Sokka could see that Katara had hands on hips in scepticism, but was still smiling knowingly at this evidence of Sokka's willingness to believe in the superstitious nonsense he was always belittling everyone else for. Sokka held his arms apart and grinned in an attempt to play down the incident.

"Heheh...kids these days!" Sokka spoke jokingly. Peering down at his own nose-bleed, he hurriedly pinched his nostrils with one hand while still holding out the other. It was in this embarrassing position that a small squad of four Fire Militia abruptly appeared around the corner of the oval and marched up to them. The Water Tribe sibling's blood froze out of fear of discovery.

"Hello, there," the young officer in charge of the squad walked up and waved a friendly hello, "sorry to bother you, but we're looking for information on a young boy, around 11 years of age, thin build with brown hair. You haven't seen anyone like that in the last six hours, have you?"

The squad of Militia, wielding pikes except for the officer and looking menacing in spite of their friendliness, waited expectantly for a response. Sokka peered to Katara, who peered back at Sokka. If they were talking about Nandi, that was bad. If they were talking about Aang, that was really, really bad. Being set upon by a group of Fire Nation soldiers was unnerving for any member of the Water Tribe, and coupled with the surprise at their appearance and the awkwardness of Sokka's position, made them stand stock still in nervousness. Realising that they were taking too long was just making their nervousness worse. Finally, out of desperation, Sokka blurted out, "sorry! Can't help you! We only just came up on deck! Ehhh...bad case of sea-sickness! Needed to lie down! Haven't seen anybody! Nope!"

The fresh-faced officer might have taken to the long pause and hurried reply with suspicion, but as it was he had to strangle a guffaw at Sokka's nasal voice and try hard to retain a veneer of professionalism, "is...something wrong with your nose?"

"...nosebleed," Sokka answered curtly.

"And...your hair?" the officer asked.

"...lice," the Warrior responded.

The officer shook his head in pity, "you poor soul..."

"This boy...what's his name?" Katara jumped into the conversation once the danger had passed, "maybe we can help?"

"It's nothing to worry about, we have it under control..." the officer began.

"Nandi..." a strained voice piped up behind the squad, and the Militia felt obliged to step aside to let through the determined, slender young woman. Kyo was trying hard to keep herself under control, and succeeding admirably, taking command of the questioning, stepping up to Sokka, "you saw him this morning, only a minute before he disappeared. I remember you. You and your friend. Nandi's friend. Please, tell me you saw him. Tell me you've seen my boy."

Faced with this fraught, distressed mother, Sokka mellowed. He couldn't wisecrack or just cover his tracks. But what could he say? He couldn't tell her the truth. Even if it didn't bring the wrath of the militia upon them all, he couldn't bring himself to tell this woman that her son was lying inside a vault in the Coolant Room. But lying felt wrong too. He glanced at Katara for guidance, but she was as lost as he was. Sokka took his hand away from his nose and hoped a good response would come to him.

"I..." Sokka stopped abruptly as more blood dribbled out of his nose. He slapped his hand back and felt ashamed of himself.

"Oh for goodness' sake..." Kyo pulled a napkin from her pocket and grabbed Sokka's hand, pulling it away to dab Sokka's bleeding nose with her fingers, "here...this'll clean you up."

After a few dabs, Sokka felt like his nostrils could breathe again. He blushed with embarrassment, "thanks..." and he added skittishly "but...I'm sorry. I don't know any more than you do."

Kyo stepped away, putting the napkin away, and nodded once in recognition. She smiled weakly, "at least I know someone cares."

Sokka's smile back came naturally. He looked aside at Katara, who was keeping up a smile in return, then abruptly turned away and crossed her arms crossly. What was she thinking? Of more interest was the officer turning up towards the sky and shrugging. Sokka followed the shrug and found that it was directed at the top of the con tower, where a serious-looking female officer, probably the Captain, leaned over the railings to watch the search in progress. She didn't seem happy at the lack of it.

By the time Sokka's eyes had returned to eye level, the search party had moved on to the nearest adult, apart from the officer, who gave the disguised Water Tribesman a condescending glance before moving on. Sokka experienced a sinking feeling when he realised what he was giving a glance for. He'd said he hadn't seen Nandi because of seasickness when he obviously had done. Curse him and his big mouth. The officer made clear that he'd come back for him, and turned to the overly large woman flapping pieces of clothing over the side of the ship and hanging them back on the railing. He asked "excuse me, ma'am? Sorry to bother you. We're looking for a...what are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" the woman didn't give the officer the slightest bit of attention, "I'm drying out my daughter's clothes after they got soaked last night...aaaand this morning...aaaand just a few minutes ago. Don't ask me how, but the little sneak just keeps gettin' 'em wet. An' that joke ye call a laundry room ain't gettin' any cheaper."

"Well why didn't you say so!?" a smiling entrepreneur asked loudly. Sokka gave a small shriek as Xuan appeared right behind him without any warning whatsoever, making a bee-line for the woman along with two lovely, smartly-dressed assistants. The sly middle-aged man took one of the woman's hands and kissed it lightly, imploring her, "it would be an honour to bequeath to you one of our all-inclusive laundry tokens. Anything to make your journey with the Hong Yu Guo Service that much more comfortable!"

The woman looked down at the man in mild disgust, and snapped her hand away, instinctively wiping it against her shirt. She muttered, "er...thanks...I guess."

"Anyway," the officer interrupted the little exchange to ask, "have you seen a small boy? Aged around 11? Brown-haired? A little thin?"

"Aw, heck, they all look alike ta me," the woman took to collecting up the wet clothes, "small 'n smarmy 'n soaking wet. Th' lot of them."

The exchange moved into other territory, a back and forth seeking more info, with Kyo close to pleading for any scrap of knowledge, and Xuan trying increasingly desperate means to distract her from anything being amiss. The kids behind him kept playing loudly in complete ignorance of the conversation, but something had dislodged in Sokka's mind. A small piece of conversation he'd overlooked until now. Soaking wet. Something about last night and getting soaking wet. Clothes needing dried. Being with other kids. As it came together, the 'ding' in the Warrior's head was almost audible.

"Hold on!" Sokka cried out, attracting everyone's attention, "you said that Nandi had gotten wet from standing on the prow at night with the other kids, right?" Kyo nodded. Sokka continued, "and your kid got wet the same way, right?" The woman, befuddled as she was, nodded slowly. Sokka concluded, "then maybe those kids know something! Maybe this is all connected somehow! Where's your daughter now?"

The woman, considering Sokka's insight, stood back for a moment. The officer looked Sokka over and mentally took him off the suspects list, somewhat impressed with his investigative skills. The woman shrugged and pointed past Sokka, "okay, she's right...over..."

All eyes turned and saw an empty deck behind Sokka. Where the five kids had been playing before, now there was nothing but a few lonesome puddles of water. They'd all heard the children playing just seconds ago. There couldn't possibly have been enough time for them to disappear, and they all realised that. Sokka and Katara's faces fell, knowing what was going on. Above, the Captain leaned over and peered closely at the empty deck. She didn't see them leave either.

"Maybe...they just went inside?" Xuan spoke hopefully.

"I told her to stay where I could see her..." the woman rushed forward, looking frantically from side to side and calling "Ya! Ya, where are you!?"

Kyo was trembling and shaking her head, her hands rubbing each other in a futile effort to calm herself, shuddering "not again...please, not again..."

"Spread out!" the officer commanded loudly enough for everyone on-deck to hear, marching forward as he called his orders, "find them! Now!"

Captain Mayu had seen enough, and pushed her hands off of the railings as she ran off the balcony and back into the con tower. Sokka dragged Katara along, imploring "c'mon! We have to tell Wan!"

Everyone was running, except for Xuan, stuck to the spot in a state of shock. His victory was slipping away from him as he breathed. Those pools of water on the deck could soon be the liquefied remains of his reputation if he didn't do something drastic, and fast. His lovely assistants stood dim-wittedly beside him, wondering exactly what was going on. He smiled a freakish smile and placed his hands on his assistants shoulders, "'scuse me ladies, but Papa Xuan needs to sort out something pronto. Be right back!"

Xuan legged it towards the con tower, disappearing inside before his assistants had the chance to react. One of them huffed, "I gave up Aqueduct Engineering at the Academy for this?"

"Right with you, sister," the other assistant chimed.

Mask-faces watched the rigmarole from under the waves, distanced from the petty whims of the little people on board. They were sharper than typical, but none of that would matter. There was nothing that could stop. Soon, very soon, they'd have their children back. And the Avatar would pay the consequences for breaking their promise.

To Be Continued…

Avatar: The Last Airbender Concept and Characters © Nickelodeon 2005-06


Author's Note: I keep saying I'll update more regularly, and I never do. What does that say about me? I apologise for having this turgid, overblown offering to give to you. A lot of it has been swishing around my head for months, waiting to be put to page, while everything else is ill-conceived, leaden humour, convoluted melodrama and pointless, POINTLESS exposition. Gragh! I think I'm getting worse. And longer. Definitely longer. I'm going to have to cut down on the size of these chapters if I want to keep myself sane. There's enough stuff in here to fill three whole parts, and it just keeps gooooiiiiing. I need to speed up drastically to keep MY interest, let alone yours. Self-loathing. SELF-LOATHING!

I'm just going to have to be resigned to the face that updates will come at a snail's pace. I was on holiday at my parents' if that's any excuse, and I'm writing on my fancy new laptop now, having managed to claw my way through the second half of this chapter over the course of three days. The Chapter 4 of Book 3 is going to have to be a lot more streamlined to keep me going. The next 'episode' is already looking more light-hearted and fun than this sub-Hitchcockian nonsense (further evidence that M. Night Shyamalan is a baaaaad idea, considering this material).

Haha...I make in-joke. Rimshot plz... COLLAPSE