Four days after moving into their apartment, Caitlin and Brandon received their first visitor. Caitlin had secretly wanted it to be Jeff, but realistically she knew that it would be a long time before he came to see her or Brandon. She wasn't disappointed at who came instead though, as Paul arrived on her doorstep with a huge bouquet of flowers in a beautiful vase.
"Paul." Caitlin smiled and reached out to hug him, being careful not to knock the vase out of his hand. "I'm so glad to see you."
He responded by kissing the top of her head and taking her hand gently. In an instant, Caitlin felt warm and safe, the way she used to feel around him four years ago, before everything in her life had begun to go pear-shaped.
Brandon bounded into the hallway, anxious to see who was at the door. He too had thought that it was Jeff, who he had been missing incredibly, although his three year old mind was often drawn away to the goings-on in the big city. Seeing Paul, he stopped dead, nearly slipping on the wood flooring and stared at the man standing with his mother.
"Hi," Paul said, bending down onto one knee and looking his son in the eye. "What's your name, big fella?"
Brandon stood there not moving an inch or saying, overcome with shyness and a slight fear and in complete awe of the huge man towering above him.
"This is Brandon," Caitlin said, moving beside her son and putting a reassuring arm around him. "Brandon, say hello to Paul."
"Hi," he whispered nervously, gripping his mother's sleeve tightly. "Are you Triple H?"
Paul laughed, although Caitlin could tell he was upset that Brandon knew him only because of his in-ring persona. "Yes I am. Nice to meet you Brandon."
Brandon let Paul shake his tiny hand, before retreating back behind his mother, who shot Paul an apologetic smile.
Catching Paul's eye, Caitlin saw two huge pools of emotion that seemed to be eating him up from the inside out. She knew he was desperate to hug his son, and was doing everything he could to hold back. Despite his feelings, Paul was managing to stay aware enough to know that Brandon would freak out.
"Brandon honey," Caitlin looked down at the boy clutching her leg and peering round at Paul. "Can you go to your room and let mummy and Paul talk for a while?"
Obediently, Brandon trotted through to his room, quite glad to put some distance between himself and the big scary man his mother had let into the house. Caitlin led Paul into the sitting room and motioned for him to sit down on the couch opposite her. He watched her wander through to the kitchen and return with a couple of bottles of water for the two of them. Dry-mouthed, Paul smiled and took a bottle from her, quickly twisting off the cap and taking a large gulp.
"So this is your new place?" Paul looked round approvingly. He liked it, even though it was poorly furnished compared to the last apartment Caitlin had in the city. "It's really nice."
"Thanks." Caitlin knew she couldn't deal with small talk, she had to cut straight to the issue on her mind before she lost her nerve and she wasted another chance. "I think we should talk about Brandon."
Paul looked at his feet, unsure what Caitlin was about to say. He wanted to talk about it, but at the same time, he was anxious about what she was going to say. He wanted to laugh. Triple H, a man that many fear in the ring, was petrified what a woman was going to say to him.
"I don't think I can tell him about you just yet. He's too young, and he's been through a lot in the last few days, what with the move and all. I think we should let him settle, and as far as he is concerned, you are just a friend, a good friend, but a friend. I know that's not what you want and I can understand if you are frustrated, but I have to take this in baby steps for now. Is that okay?"
Paul nodded. He was scared to open his mouth, afraid of what might spill out. He wanted to tell Caitlin that it wasn't okay, that he wanted to be a proper part of his son's life. He wanted to make up for the time he had lost being a fool. He still beat himself up on a regular basis for the way he had treated her. But he knew that saying any of that to her wouldn't help matters. So instead he silently leaned over and gently kissed Caitlin on the lips.
Caitlin's arms wrapped around his neck and grasping him tightly, forcing the kiss deeper. She felt so alive and finally free of the world, she felt as though for once everything was going to be alright and that she could get used to a life without Jeff.
Pulling back reluctantly, Paul looked deep into Caitlin's eyes. "I can't believe I have you back. I never thought this would happen in a million years. I thought I lost you and it was eating me up inside. Ask Shawn or Kevin, I was unbearable. I must have done something right for once."
"You must have done a lot of wishing and praying really hard," Caitlin agreed jokily, her hands running down Paul's broad shoulders, remembering the many nights they had spent together, nothing separately their two bodies, almost unable to believe that he was sitting here with her now, and that he had really changed.
But what has he proved? Caitlin mentally asked herself. He could still be the same as before. You thought he was a decent guy, and look what he did. How do you know what happened with him and Stephanie. He could have cheated on her too. Can a leopard really change his spots?
Shut up, Caitlin scolded herself. Stop jumping to conclusions and fearing the worst like you always do. Just enjoy the fact that he is here now and for the time being, he doesn't seem to be going anywhere.
"What are you thinking about?" He asked, a puzzled look coming over his face. "You look like you're a million miles away."
Caitlin shook the doubts out of her head and gave him a bright smile. "Nothing, I was just thinking about furniture."
They chatted idly about Caitlin's job at RAW magazine, and Paul's upcoming storylines for a while, before Brandon came running through and announced that he was hungry.
"Mummy, I want lunch."
"Sorry, mister. What did you say?" Caitlin gave her son a meaningful look.
"Mummy, can I please have some lunch, please?" He gave her his biggest brightest eyes, the ones he already knew she couldn't resist.
"That's a lot better. What would you like?"
"I want a PB and J sandwich with lots of J," he told her. "And no crusts, because they are gross."
Paul and Caitlin burst out laughing at the way Brandon screwed up his face at the thought of the crusts of the sandwich. Giving them a look that clearly asked what they found so funny, Brandon turned around and ran back to his room.
"Come and help me in the kitchen," Caitlin told Paul as she wandered through the flat. "You can talk and I can make sandwiches."
They chatted as Caitlin make their son's lunch (without crusts). At several points Paul found himself looking over at Caitlin and feeling a deep longing to make love to her, the way they used to. He shook his head, trying to get the thoughts to leave him alone. He knew that after what had happened before, he was going to have to take the physical side very slowly.
While she was making lunch, Caitlin chatted away, mainly about Brandon.
"He is really missing his daddy," she said and noticed a puzzled look come over his face, followed by a look of realisation.
"Are you talking about Jeff?" He asked, feeling emotion rise up. "Does he think Jeff is his dad?"
Caitlin grimaced. She didn't mean for Paul to find out about this until later, and she wasn't sure what to say. "Well, it just sort of happened that way. We didn't mean it, but Jeff was the closet thing to a father he had and we figured it would be less confusing for him."
Paul rose out of his chair. "I need to go. I have a meeting."
"Paul, don't do this," she replied, but she was too late. Paul was already halfway out of the kitchen door and showed no signs of turning back. Just as she was about to follow him and try and work it out, the phone rang.
"Hello," she said, distractedly.
"Hey girl," Amy's cheery voice came down the line. "How's things?"
"Not fantastic. What can I do for you?" She asked, not really wanting to hear an answer.
"I'm just phoning to let you know that I'm going to be in New York next week for a couple of appearances and I thought it would be cool to catch up. I think we have some talking to do."
What does Amy want to talk about? Why did Paul storm out? Is that the end of Caitlin and Paul? Tune in next week...well, when I eventually get round to writing the next chapter!
