I'm writing this chappie in a fit of inspiration! Once you read it, you figure well, it had to happen sometime. I mean, he is Nephamael. Not everybody gets to be a Roiben. WHY ARE YOU SO SELFISH???? Sorry. It's Three in the morning, the only time I get unobstructed access to the computer. :P

-X-

I drifted behind Nephamael.

I was nothing but a shadow. Unable to speak or want, I ignored Roiben, and when I could, I gave him a look that said, This is for my life. Only I could not tell him this was my love. It was half between awful and lovely, the way I lived for this pathetic trailing, for a smile aimed just for me, or for moments sitting behind his chair, absorbed in the way the thorns plunged into deep already-made cuts, making them bleed once more. I don't think, half the time, he knew I was there, or if he did he had no time for me, unlike before when he only had time for me. I didn't let that bother me. He loved me. I knew it.

I leaned my head on the stone-and-earth wall that separated th Queens retiring rooms and the main part of the hill, where Roiben no doubt stood, just on the other side of the door, waiting. I let the thought go. If I thought about him, I'd feel pity. And I didn't want pity.

"And what of the girl, Myrocia?" The Night Queen lifted her goblet of wine to her perfect lips and set it down on the hands of a trembling hob. I looked up at Nephamael, he hadn't so much as twitched. I gave alittle sigh and rested my head on my knees. It was an ignoring day. There seemed to be more and more of those recently. The leather backing of my loves chair bulged as he leaned back, at ease.

"What of her?" I was mildly surprised by this reply, but after all, this was Nephamael, who knew not the meaning of subtlety, and was hard, always hard.

"You seem to have an affection for her."

I tuned my entire mind into the conversation. Some might call it eavesdropping, hiding behind his large chair and listening in, but all I craved was to be near him, I couldn't care what he was saying, I only wanted the smooth texture of his voice in the air. I was prepared to be rooted out and told to leave, for Nephamael to turn around in the stretching silence and order me, none to gently but with love in his eyes, to go.

What I was not prepared for was the barking laughter that followed.

"My lady, you must see she is nothing but a whore!"

I pressed my hands to my mouth, stifling my shocked cry. My green eyes were wide as saucers as I looked up to the fine head of my love. My love. The word echoed around in my head like I was standing in a horrible canyon. Even the Queen had frozen.

"Indeed?" her voice seemed no more than politely interested, but her expression betrayed her hunger.

"Yes. It is a very entertaining story, if you would care to listen."

"I suppose."

"When I first arrived at the Seelie court, I was at a loss. I had been used to being admired and loved . . . especially by women. As it was, many of the girls at the Ladys court were lovely, and they caught my eye. Myrocia is one of the many I took a liking to, including your new knights sister. She was especially . . . willing. She was the one Silarial saw me chasing, and due to her belief you can only like one at a time, she sent her. She was naught even my favorite."

Tears were flowing openly down my pale cheeks, and only my slim fingers covering my mouth kept me from screaming curse and hitting him, and only common sense kept me from trying to hurt him.

"How intriguing," the Queen said, sounding sedated, her hunger gone.

"Indeed. She's nothing but one of many, and you should see how she launches herself at me. I've quite tired of her."

"Let us go, Nephamael, fine food awaits," came the Queens lovely voice, and the door opened and closed, Nephamael stepping through swiftly, and I could see the quick glance he shot towards me, a look of triumph.

By now all my tears have drained and left pure fury in their place.

-X-

If that was love, sacrificing your dignity and life for a meeting of lips, I had no wish for it.

If only I had held true, and not given it all up for this awful man, this would not be happening. If Roiben had not fallen so hopelessly in love with the Queen, his life would be peaceful and light, he would sit with Ethine, Talathain and I, braiding flowers in his sisters hair. I would not be so hopelessly angry. I ran out of the room, angry, crying and out for blood.

A green-skinned pixie ran lightly by, I grabbed her shoulder. She turned, fear showing clearly on her face. Why did she seem familiar? Oh, yes. I had seen her here earlier, Roiben had kissed her, and it had softened my heart, petrified by Nephamael.

"You're the pixie, yes, the one who kissed Roiben?"

Panic was etched on her face, and I looked her in the eyes.

"He said this would happen, she said they'd hurt me . . . let go!" she demanded, yanking away with each of the last two words. I nodded.

"I'm a friend of Roibens . . . just do this for me, alright?" She paused in her bid for freedom and studied my face. "Don't hurt him. If this is some sort of game to you, don't do it. It's not worth it. Just don't hurt him."

She looked at me, confused, but I had already released her and was walking for my rooms, plans formulating in my head as easily as if they'd always been there. And perhaps they had, just waiting for me to realize I hated him so much.

-X-

I just finished watching Pans Labyrinth, which, without fail, made me cry and filled me with inspiration. I have veered from my aforementioned plans, and I LOVE my new ending! Although I'm sniveling just thinking about it. YOU WILL CRY. YOU WILL.

Excellent. Snivellus,

-Ash