Chapter II: Knowing the enemy.
Now in the kitchen of her home, Kim tries to understand what went wrong, as she tries to calm down the headache cause by her own grappling hook.
Kim: (With her hands around her head) I can't believe he got away!
Ron: (bringing a bag of ice) don't you worry K.P. we'll catch him next time.
Kim: (with the ice bag on her head) thanks. Who is this guy anyway?
Ron: Well at least we got the money back.
They hear a sound. A sound heard thousands of times before.
Kim(looking her watch) Wade. What did you find?
Wade: Kim. This guy is something else. Just look at this list. 48 charges of identity theft, 48 of perjury, 64 of trespass, 85 charges of robbery, 3 of forgery, 154 charges of grand theft auto, 33 of smuggling, 72 of weapon possession, 36 of assault, 12 charges of simple battery, including what he did to Joss, 9 of mayhem, 32 of conspiracy to commit murder, 346 charges of attempt of murder, and finally 24 charges of murder on the first degree. Something about border patrols.
Ron: My God! He is more dangerous than Shego.
Kim: Shego knows how to fight, this guy just shoots and runs, it was luck that he hit me.
Ron: I don't know K.P. I think we have to be really careful around this guy.
Wade: I'm with Ron in this one Kim. 966 charges is something, Shego is around 600.
Kim: It doesn't matter, I can take him.
Wade: Kim. You know what is the scariest thing about this guy?
Ron: Other than 966 charges?
Wade: 966 charges so far. And the first crime he made was 7 weeks ago. Not even G.J. has been able to find out the guy's name or from where he is.
Ron: I thought it was Red Hand.
Wade: Na, the local news gave him the name, cause of the glove.
Kim: So no one has caught this guy? Not even once?
Wade: (scratching the back of his neck) actually… yes.
Ron: What about fingerprints then?
Wade: Yeah… this is how it works with this guy. First he gets arrested, then just before the fingerprints or the photograph. He escapes.
Ron How?
Wade: Well let's just say that more than half of the charges were made by policemen.
Kim: What kinds of policemen live in that place?
Wade: Places Kim. You heard about him because of Joss but. He's been arrested in Arizona, Utah, Wyoming and Montana.
Kim: So his in the move.
Wade: I'll be watching the F.B.I's database, in case of anything ne…
Kim: Wade?
Wade: He was arrested! Oh.
Ron Oh? What's oh?
Wade: He escaped again. Now he has 1001 charges.
Kim What did he do now?
Wade: Well, Long story short. He smashed the entire department of Pryor, Montana. This time they interrogate him, and. He is now enlisted on the F.B.I. most wanted.
Ron: Yeah, but what did he do, Wade?
Wade: Okay, let's see, well I have the testimony of an Officer Aaron. And I quote "That (Expletive deleted) broke the interrogation room glass with my partner and started to jump all over the place kicking, throwing thing at people, then after he went to the evidence room for his guns he took me hostage, started to shut the locks of the cells letting all the people we arrested that night out. All of this while shooting random and singing Mika's Grace Kelly. Finally he escaped by biting the ear of Officer Colville here. This is one twisted (Expletive deleted) Tyson Wannabe."
Ron: He bit his ear?
Kim: Well, At least hi's a small villain.
Ron: Small! He shoots, bites and sings!
Kim: So.
Ron: I, I mean that, (exhales) his tough O.K., hi's.
Kim: (Interrupting) What I meant was, that he's just a thief, his not a real villain.
Agent Johnson(making his brown eyes appear from behind his sun glassesfor a second to look at his partnermen they were wrong.
Agent Thompson(Writing in his notebook with a little chuckle) I'll say.
Ron: (Looking with amazed eyes and open mouth what it seem to be two amateur interrogators) ah. Excuse me!
Both agents turn his head to Ron.
Ron: I was in the middle of something.
Agent Johnson: (accommodatinghis black tie) sorry. (Pointing his palm at Ron) please continue.
And he did.
Kim: O.K. Wade thanks for the info.
Wade: Later Kim
Wade disappears of the teen's watch as she faces a very worried face.
Kim: Ron. (Grabbing Ron's face) Listen to me. I'm gonna be O.K.
Ron: (Grabbing Kim's hips and pull her close) I know. It's just that, you really scare me back there.
Kim: I'm fine.
Ron: (smiling and getting close to her face) just fine?
She chuckles and he kisses her.
Agent Thompson: Mr. Stoppable?
Ron returns to reality with that voice
Agent Johnson: Are you gonna tell us every detail of the story?
Ron: Yes.
Agent Thompson: Exhaling while returning to his notebook) O.K.
Ron: But, you were right. We were wrong. All of the sudden he pop up from Montana to Europe.
Agent Johnson: Aaaahhhh! (Looking at his partner and waving his finger) Florence.
Agent Thompson: Yeah I remember. The Interpol was pissed.
Ron: I don't blame them he took the David and robbed the stores of Ponte Vecchio in the same week.
Agent Johnson: Then it was France.
Agent Thompson: The Mona Lisa, Liberty leading the people, Oath of the Horatti, The pilgrims of Emmaus, St. Sebastian.
Agent Johnson: Hell, he almost broke your back against the winged victory of Samothrace.
Ron: Yes, I remember that thank you. The statue was ugly anyway. It didn't even have a head, or arms. How do you guys know so much of this?
Agent Thompson: It's our job Mr. Stoppable.
Agent Johnson: And we watched the surveillance videos, they were kicking around back in the office. They're pretty funny.
We're transported to the Central Intelligence Agency. Were all the agents of the floor are watching a surveillance tape
Agent 1: Come on, Come on.
While saying this all the agents watching the tape are slowly raising their hands
Agent 1: Come on, Come on, Come on
Agent 6 and 8: oh, oh, oh, oh.
The tape now shows how Red Hand kicks Ron to the winged victory of Samothrace and he and the statue fall to the floor below turning the victory into pieces.
All the people in the room now with the hand completely in the air start laughing and screaming things at the same time
Agent 1: He kicks and scores!!!!!!!!
Agent 4, 6, 8, 34, 54, 23: Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Agent 2: That gotta hurt.
Agent 3: There goes a couple million.
If you were looking at the agent from the screen's point of view you'll say that agents Johnson and Thompson were on the left corner, sitting on two computer chairs.
Agent Thompson: And yet another World Heritage the U.S. destroys
Agent Johnson: Another one?
Agent Thompson: Yes, the first one was the real Mona Lisa.
Agent Johnson: What?! The one he stole is a fake?
Agent Thompson: Yeah, long story, true story. It happens, that Marilyn Monroe…
A man opens violently the doors and walks in while in the room suddenly silence reign
Man: What the hell is going on here? Why isn't anybody working?
Agent 2: Director, sir…
Director: Wait. It's that. Yeah it is! Did you get to the part when the blond kid is kicked to a statue?
Agent 45 We just pass that.
Director: Well rewind it, I love that part.
They see it yet one more time and do the same rising hands ritual.
Agent 23: (While everybody's laughing and with a tape on her hand) who wants to see the Roswell crash again?
Agent Johnson: Oh! (Pointing at the tape that agent 23 has in her hands) that tape is freaking hilarious!
Now back in the interrogation room.
Ron: Angrily Well, I'm glad you like it.
Agent Thompson: Man, you always have to take the mystery out of everything, do you?
Agent Johnson: What do you mean by mystery? Oh, right. ImitatingThompson) It's our job Mr. Stoppable. What the hell was that?
Agent Thompson: It's call being dramatic.
Agent Johnson: Being dramatic.
Agent Thompson: Yeah. It's in the manual.
Agent Johnson: What the …
Agent Thompson: (Interrupting) yeah.
Agent Johnson: Manual? What manual?
Agent Thompson: It's part of the job.
Agent Johnson: (Little pause) we have a manual?
Ron clears his throat in order to make the agents stop his ridiculous discussion and it works. They are now quiet and facing the teen.
Ron: You guys done?
Agent ThompsonYeah.
Agent Johnson Sorry.
Agent Thompson(Returning his eyes to his notebook) Please continue.
Ron: Well, I think he return to Italy after a while, he stole something at Venice.
Agent Johnson: Then Jonny went to Rome.
Ron: Yes, Jonny.
Agent Thompson: He stole the "Puerta de Alcala" and the "Arc de Triomphe"
Ron: Yes, we later took them back, Jonny sell them both to the Seniors.
Another sound interrupts the conversation, an explosion even louder than before, this time little pieces of ceiling fall while the lamp start to hang from a cable. Ron rushes to the door while the lights still comes and goes. While opening the door all stops and all people stand still for a second, but then the "hospital" start again like nothing happened.
Agent Johnson: Mr. Stoppable.
Ron closes the door behind him and picking up his chair sits down facing the two agents once more.
Agent Thompson: Can we hurry this thing.
Ron: We could, if you guys shut up.
Agent Johnson: (A little offended) O.K.
Ron: Well, where was I, oh, yeah. I think I'm going to tell you more about Juan.
